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Wedding Vows & Ceremony Discussions
How can I maximize space for the ceremony?
If I get no responses to this, I'll understand it as that there are no answers to my questions. Please don't respond negatively... Thank you!
Now, the question:
My fiance and I chose a venue, which is great. We were going to do our ceremony on their porch and then have the reception inside; however, my fiance and his family have way more guests than anticpated that we're inviting (Our total is 240) and when we went back to the venue today to ask some questions and confirm things, we found out the maximum seating that they can provide on the patio is 100 (and 220 in the reception hall). The 100 seats for the ceremony is way less than how many we're inviting... and while although we know a good portion of those people won't come at all, and some won't come to the ceremony, we still will probably have more than 100 and thus we're trying to figure out possible ways to maximize the space.
I suggested having some people stand, although my fiance was not having that (and I understand why).
We're thinking of having some people around the porch, or trying to change the direction that the chairs are facing to fit more... we were wondering if any one else this problem of not enough space for their ceremony, and what they did.
Thank you so very much for any help offered!
Now, the question:
My fiance and I chose a venue, which is great. We were going to do our ceremony on their porch and then have the reception inside; however, my fiance and his family have way more guests than anticpated that we're inviting (Our total is 240) and when we went back to the venue today to ask some questions and confirm things, we found out the maximum seating that they can provide on the patio is 100 (and 220 in the reception hall). The 100 seats for the ceremony is way less than how many we're inviting... and while although we know a good portion of those people won't come at all, and some won't come to the ceremony, we still will probably have more than 100 and thus we're trying to figure out possible ways to maximize the space.
I suggested having some people stand, although my fiance was not having that (and I understand why).
We're thinking of having some people around the porch, or trying to change the direction that the chairs are facing to fit more... we were wondering if any one else this problem of not enough space for their ceremony, and what they did.
Thank you so very much for any help offered!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: How can I maximize space for the ceremony?
[QUOTE]Have you put down a deposit yet? If not, my suggestion would be to look for another venue, if you don't want to trim your guest list. Otherwise it'd be crowded and uncomfortable for your guests. Capacity was one of the main search criteria for us when we were looking for venues.
Posted by ltaylor713[/QUOTE]
Yes, we already put the down payment, are planning on keeping this site, and not trimming down the guest list. :/ Like I said, there's a lot of people on the list that we don't think will be coming (ie: I have family in Australia that I'm inviting... but they all have health problems and haven't been to the states in decards and so they're surely not coming) but we don't know what number that is, and it will still probably be over 100.. so we're trying to figure this out. :/
[QUOTE]If I get no responses to this, I'll understand it as that there are no answers to my questions. Please don't respond negatively... Thank you! Now, the question: My fiance and I chose a venue, which is great. We were going to do our ceremony on their porch and then have the reception inside; however, my fiance and his family have way more guests than anticpated that we're inviting (Our total is 240) and when we went back to the venue today to ask some questions and confirm things, we found out the maximum seating that they can provide on the patio is 100 (and 220 in the reception hall). The 100 seats for the ceremony is way less than how many we're inviting... and while although we know a good portion of those people won't come at all, and some won't come to the ceremony, we still will probably have more than 100 and thus we're trying to figure out possible ways to maximize the space. I suggested having some people stand, although my fiance was not having that (and I understand why). We're thinking of having some people around the porch, or trying to change the direction that the chairs are facing to fit more... we were wondering if any one else this problem of not enough space for their ceremony, and what they did. Thank you so very much for any help offered!
Posted by theysayshannon[/QUOTE]
You might want to consider having the ceremony in the reception space. If the reception space can accomodate 220 people, it sounds like that is your best choice. Without seeing the floor plan, I'm not sure anyone here can tell you how to squeeze more chairs in. But, if the venue is saying the patio only holds 100 chairs, I would probably trust them. And, good for your fiance for saying everyone needs chairs. He is right. No one should have to stand during your ceremony.
Alternatively, choose a different venue for your ceremony and just have the reception at your chosen venue. It just sounds like your original plan isn't going to work. Even if a lot of those 240 decline, the chances of 140 declining is pretty slim.
Websites/blogs where our wedding has been featured:
http://www.dapperq.com/2013/11/a-very-dapper-wedding/
http://www.onabicyclebuiltfortwo.com/2013/10/wedding-christina-g.html
http://4realequalityweddings.com/2014/05/16/g-christina/
[QUOTE]If I get no responses to this, I'll understand it as that there are no answers to my questions. Please don't respond negatively... Thank you! Now, the question: My fiance and I chose a venue, which is great. We were going to do our ceremony on their porch and then have the reception inside; however, my fiance and his family have way more guests than anticpated that we're inviting (Our total is 240) and when we went back to the venue today to ask some questions and confirm things, we found out the maximum seating that they can provide on the patio is 100 (and 220 in the reception hall). The 100 seats for the ceremony is way less than how many we're inviting... and while although we know a good portion of those people won't come at all, and some won't come to the ceremony, we still will probably have more than 100 and thus we're trying to figure out possible ways to maximize the space. I suggested having some people stand, although my fiance was not having that (and I understand why). We're thinking of having some people around the porch, or trying to change the direction that the chairs are facing to fit more... we were wondering if any one else this problem of not enough space for their ceremony, and what they did. Thank you so very much for any help offered!
Posted by theysayshannon[/QUOTE]
There is absolutely no way that you're going to more than double the number of people the venue itself tells you it can accommodate on the porch (from 100 to 240). You either need to cut your entire guest list to 100 people or find somewhere else to have the ceremony. Having people stand is also not an option.
Further, if the most that the venue can hold is 220, you cannot invite more than 220 people. Does that 220 include your vendors as well, and you and the groom? Never invite more than you can either afford to host or more than the venue itself will hold.
[QUOTE]Is there room on the lawn or backyard to set up the ceremony? If not, I would agree that holding the ceremony in the reception hall would be your best bet. You can then invite guests out to the patio for cocktail hour while they flip the space.
Posted by TeamBLT[/QUOTE]
This is exactly what I was thinking. It also works for a rain plan.
[QUOTE]In Response to How can I maximize space for the ceremony? : There is absolutely no way that you're going to more than double the number of people the venue itself tells you it can accommodate on the porch (from 100 to 240). You either need to cut your entire guest list to 100 people or find somewhere else to have the ceremony. Having people stand is also not an option. Further, if the most that the venue can hold is 220, you cannot invite more than 220 people. Does that 220 include your vendors as well, and you and the groom? Never invite more than you can either afford to host or more than the venue itself will hold.
Posted by Viczaesar[/QUOTE]
<div>This 100%. I don't understand why you are even still considering this venue if you are inviting more than it can hold. </div>
ETA: Provided your guest count won't exceed 220
[QUOTE]Depending how big this venue is for you, I was wondering if you can move the ceremony on the grass if the landscape is beautiful enough.<strong> If not the you might have to tell your guests first come first served and anybody who shows up too late will just have to wait until the ceremony is over. </strong>As a wedding planner I run into this alot.
Posted by Creative Response[/QUOTE]
<div>I would be livid if I arrived at a wedding and was told this, and I would turn and walk out. ALL guests need to be hosted properly. It shouldn't be a race to get their first to get to actually see the wedding. </div>
[QUOTE]Depending how big this venue is for you, I was wondering if you can move the ceremony on the grass if the landscape is beautiful enough. If<strong> not the you might have to tell your guests first come first served and anybody who shows up too late will just have to wait until the ceremony is over.</strong> As a wedding planner I run into this alot.
Posted by Creative Response[/QUOTE]
That is not in any way okay. As a wedding planner you should know that, frankly.
This is horrible advice. As a wedding planner, I hope you are not telling brides that this is ok. You should be telling them that changes need to be made to properly accommodate their guests.
Websites/blogs where our wedding has been featured:
http://www.dapperq.com/2013/11/a-very-dapper-wedding/
http://www.onabicyclebuiltfortwo.com/2013/10/wedding-christina-g.html
http://4realequalityweddings.com/2014/05/16/g-christina/
Alright guys, when I said: If I get no responses to this, I'll understand it as that there are no answers to my questions. Please don't respond negatively... Thank you!
it was referring to people like you, and others on this message board that have said the same thing.
When we originally booked the venue, we thought we were only going to have about 180 guests. Then his parents decided to invite more guests, and that because they were paying for them, it's okay. So we ended up agreeing to it. It was all something that we didn't realize, and now we're trying to figure out how to fix that mistake. I asked for advice on how to fix it - not for people to tell me that I'm wrong, or considering horrible options for my guests - obviously I'm asking for advice, because my ideas may be flawed.
You don't need to tell me that I'm rude and a horrible person or something. It was a mistake. It happens. It's not the end of the world.
Thanks.
I will reiterate - if I get no responses to this, I will assume that it's because you don't have answers. Otherwise, I don't want a response. Thanks.
This is the second time I've asked a question on the knot boards and have only gotten really rude, snarky remarks in reply. It seems that many of you are cranky and negative... You're not really trying to help out, from my experience.
I'm sorry that I'm coming across as rude. I'm just trying to make a point - please only answer my question, otherwise, I don't want a response.
[QUOTE]"There's a good chance your venue won't allow you to rearrange the chairs to fit more people on the porch, even if it is physically possible. You'll need to either find another venue or cut your guest list. Common sense dictates that you should have thought about how many people you wanted to invite before reserving a venue. Your guests shouldn't be inconvenienced because of your poor planning." Alright guys, when I said: If I get no responses to this, I'll understand it as that there are no answers to my questions. Please don't respond negatively... Thank you! it was referring to people like you, and others on this message board that have said the same thing. When we originally booked the venue, we thought we were only going to have about 180 guests. Then his parents decided to invite more guests, and that because they were paying for them, it's okay. So we ended up agreeing to it. It was all something that we didn't realize, and now we're trying to figure out how to fix that mistake. I asked for advice on how to fix it - not for people to tell me that I'm wrong, or considering horrible options for my guests - obviously I'm asking for advice, because my ideas may be flawed. You don't need to tell me that I'm rude and a horrible person or something. It was a mistake. It happens. It's not the end of the world. Thanks. I will reiterate - if I get no responses to this, I will assume that it's because you don't have answers. Otherwise, I don't want a response. Thanks. This is the second time I've asked a question on the knot boards and have only gotten really rude, snarky remarks in reply. It seems that many of you are cranky and negative... You're not really trying to help out, from my experience. I'm sorry that I'm coming across as rude. I'm just trying to make a point - please only answer my question, otherwise, I don't want a response.
Posted by theysayshannon[/QUOTE]
<div>You can't tell people what or whether or not to post, though. It's a public board. </div><div>
</div><div>ETA: And your previous question about milkshakes also had nobody being rude to you. Just because a couple people told you they didn't like the idea of milkshakes doesn't make them cranky and negative. </div>
[QUOTE]"There's a good chance your venue won't allow you to rearrange the chairs to fit more people on the porch, even if it is physically possible. You'll need to either find another venue or cut your guest list. Common sense dictates that you should have thought about how many people you wanted to invite before reserving a venue. Your guests shouldn't be inconvenienced because of your poor planning." Alright guys, when I said: If I get no responses to this, I'll understand it as that there are no answers to my questions. Please don't respond negatively... Thank you! it was referring to people like you, and others on this message board that have said the same thing. When we originally booked the venue, we thought we were only going to have about 180 guests. Then his parents decided to invite more guests, and that because they were paying for them, it's okay. So we ended up agreeing to it. It was all something that we didn't realize, and now we're trying to figure out how to fix that mistake. I asked for advice on how to fix it - not for people to tell me that I'm wrong, or considering horrible options for my guests - obviously I'm asking for advice, because my ideas may be flawed. You don't need to tell me that I'm rude and a horrible person or something. It was a mistake. It happens. It's not the end of the world. Thanks. I will reiterate - if I get no responses to this, I will assume that it's because you don't have answers. Otherwise, I don't want a response. Thanks. This is the second time I've asked a question on the knot boards and have only gotten really rude, snarky remarks in reply. It seems that many of you are cranky and negative... You're not really trying to help out, from my experience. I'm sorry that I'm coming across as rude. I'm just trying to make a point - please only answer my question, otherwise, I don't want a response.
Posted by theysayshannon[/QUOTE]
No one was rude to you. You are the host and expected to accomodate your guests, which you aren't doing right now.....so you are in the wrong (which you acknowledge) and have to fix it. People have offered several options. The one of having it in the reception area or on the lawn if permitted are probably your best bets since you seem to not take another venue as another option. Sorry, you cannot over invite. It will come back to bite you.
I understand that FI's parents are paying, but they can't ove rinvite. Go back to them and say that no amount of extra money is going to fix a fire code issue and have them wittle it back down to 220....period. You haven't sent out your invites, so your list is still flexible. ETA: It would be much worse to invite 240, find out that 230 rsvp yes then you have to make the awkward call disinviting 10 people....it will make you look far worse in the long run. Even if his parent's are hosting, it will look bad on all 4 of you.
[QUOTE]"There's a good chance your venue won't allow you to rearrange the chairs to fit more people on the porch, even if it is physically possible. You'll need to either find another venue or cut your guest list. Common sense dictates that you should have thought about how many people you wanted to invite before reserving a venue. Your guests shouldn't be inconvenienced because of your poor planning." Alright guys, when I said: If I get no responses to this, I'll understand it as that there are no answers to my questions. Please don't respond negatively... Thank you! it was referring to people like you, and others on this message board that have said the same thing. When we originally booked the venue, we thought we were only going to have about 180 guests. Then his parents decided to invite more guests, and that because they were paying for them, it's okay. So we ended up agreeing to it. It was all something that we didn't realize, and now we're trying to figure out how to fix that mistake. I asked for advice on how to fix it - not for people to tell me that I'm wrong, or considering horrible options for my guests - obviously I'm asking for advice, because my ideas may be flawed. You don't need to tell me that I'm rude and a horrible person or something. It was a mistake. It happens. It's not the end of the world. Thanks. I will reiterate - if I get no responses to this, I will assume that it's because you don't have answers. Otherwise, I don't want a response. Thanks. This is the second time I've asked a question on the knot boards and have only gotten really rude, snarky remarks in reply. It seems that many of you are cranky and negative... You're not really trying to help out, from my experience. I'm sorry that I'm coming across as rude. I'm just trying to make a point - please only answer my question, otherwise, I don't want a response.
Posted by theysayshannon[/QUOTE]
You can't always get hat you want, but if you try sometime you just might find you get what you need.
When I ask if any one ideas as to how to fix something, and I only get told that it's a bad idea or I'm wrong, I find that rude and negative... if they don't know how to fix it, they don't really need to waist time responding.
Regardless, the problem has been fixed. The venue offered to seat more chairs if we pay a little extra and we're fine now!
[QUOTE]Depending how big this venue is for you, I was wondering if you can move the ceremony on the grass if the landscape is beautiful enough. <strong>If not the you might have to tell your guests first come first served and anybody who shows up too late will just have to wait until the ceremony is over. As a wedding planner I run into this alot.
</strong>Posted by Creative Response[/QUOTE]
Pease tell me, that you as a wedding professional, really dont think this is a good idea? OP, please note that "first come, first served" is a horrible idea.
[QUOTE]There's a good chance your venue won't allow you to rearrange the chairs to fit more people on the porch, even if it is physically possible. You'll need to either find another venue or cut your guest list. Common sense dictates that you should have thought about how many people you wanted to invite before reserving a venue. Your guests shouldn't be inconvenienced because of your poor planning.
Posted by renegade gaucho[/QUOTE]
I agree, and they also might not allow you to rearrange the chairs (or add more) because it would probably go against the fire code.
Edit: late to the party , as always.
[QUOTE]No, no one is my employee, but I don't understand why they all need to tell me that I'm wrong instead of answering my question... I find it rude, when I was just trying to get some help. When I ask if any one ideas as to how to fix something, and I only get told that it's a bad idea or I'm wrong, I find that rude and negative... if they don't know how to fix it, they don't really need to waist time responding. Regardless, the problem has been fixed. The venue offered to seat more chairs if we pay a little extra and we're fine now!
Posted by theysayshannon[/QUOTE]
Itaylo & Addier: Find a new venue if no deposit is down.
CnSin: private ceremony then larger reception
Cmgi, Team, mlg, NYC, happy & myself: ceremony in the reception room or more chairs outside
Vicz, Xstatic, snippet & renegade: cut your guest list
Those are all the answers that you got to your question. If you think the responses about how you can't over invite are rude, then you need harder skin. Budget and guestlists are the first step in planning, and you should never invite more people than you can afford or fit (and in your case that is a hard ceiling count). I'm glad you found a solution, but don't attack those of us that took the time to try to figure out a solution for you. I still stand by you needing to cut 20 people though and hold to your 220 limit (that includes you, FI and vendors). Best of luck.
I was refering to the people that responded, telling me that I was wrong. I only found it rude because I had asked people not to do that as I was looking for a solution and hoping some people may be creative.
My fiance and I had talked to the woman in charge of the venue the same day that I made this post. She told me 100 was the maximum that she could do. She was referring to the chairs that they had, and she did not tell us that which is why we didn't know that we could fit more.
My fiance spoke with her today and she said if we payed a little more, they could rent chairs from elsewhere and fit more that way.
This was something that we hadn't known before.
All that I was doing, was looking for some creative ways that people may have run into before. I was willing to do the ceremony in the parking lot if I had to.
The reason that I prefaced the post asking for no negativity, was because I have already had that experience on these forums and didn't appreciate it. I don't believe that I need "tougher skin" as I am not losing sleep over this... I was just asking you guys to consider that you were not required to respond and tell me that I was wrong - I get it, I made a mistake, I was just asking for any ideas that people may have.
I know that some people responded with ideas, and I appreciated it, I was just responding to the people telling me that I was wrong..
And I am unsure as to how my post sounds like a preschool teacher, although I am a secondary ed teacher, so I apologize if you have something against teachers.
I know that I may have sounded rude in my post - and for that I apologize. I was just frustrated because I had tried to avoid this conflict and instead it happened any ways. I was just looking for creative ideas.
For those of you that helped me, thank you! But like I said, it's all better now, so it's all good. (: