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nevermind

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Re: nevermind

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    6fsn6fsn member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    You have a few issues here.  You and the fiance need to talk about finances and savings in general.  You also need to realize that fair doesn't mean even.  I have 4 siblings.  DH has 1.  I'd hate if he said "pick your favorite to invite because we have to be even!!!"

    Also, You don't invite one person in a married couple.  That is beyond tacky.
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    DixieNormous330DixieNormous330 member
    5 Love Its First Comment First Anniversary Name Dropper
    You can't invite one half of a couple. You do not have to invite the children of said couple, but you can't only invite one of the pair. How would you like it if your FI's insert-family-member-here only invited him to a wedding or major event?
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    MNNEBrideMNNEBride member
    First Comment 5 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    A couple of things....

    1.  It is rude to invite one half of a married couple and exclude his wife and children (if you are inviting kids - that's another topic).  It's all or nothing with a couple.

    2.  If you are entering this marriage thinking everything needs to be 50/50, including finances, you are in for a hard life.  It's great to share expenses, chores, etc. but it will rarely always come out to 50 % each.  What happens if one of you looses your job or must take a lower paying position?  What if one of you becomes disabled or is laid up with a broken leg?  A partnership/relationship/marriage is not always 50/50.

    3.  Paying for 34% of your own wedding because 34% of the guests are from your side is kind of silly.  A wedding reception is a party both of you are having, not a dutch treat.
    image
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    **O-Face****O-Face** member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    You know these people will be YOUR family then too, right?
    image
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    DixieNormous330DixieNormous330 member
    5 Love Its First Comment First Anniversary Name Dropper
    O-face has a good point. You're marrying into those skeletons. Take it or leave it. If you leave half of a couple out, you're setting yourself up to be the familial pariah. It's tacky, rude, and like with all families, sometimes you just have to suck it up and deal.
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    PMeg819PMeg819 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    DH and I have been married for 6 years, together for 11. The top two things we fight about are money and his family. My ILs are annoying as fvkc and you have to have a strategy to deal with this before you get married. Getting married doesn't make ILs easier, and if you have kids it's really becomes a PITA. As for money, what others have said is true. If he's not good with money, that's not going to change and its going to cause some serious issues if you say "I paid my portion of the bills, now you pay yours" and he doesn't have the money or whatever. This 34% is so ridiculous too. So when you go out to eat do you only pay for the portion of food you eat? Like the meal is $15 but you only ate half so you for $7.50? What the total number of guests that come is less than what you anticipate, and you have more people? Are you going to give him the difference or something? I mean really, your a couple. You don't have to merge your bank accounts 100% but you have to be realistic.
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    PMeg819PMeg819 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    So basically you wanted us to say "No, you're right" about everything you posted to be validated. Real life doesn't work that way. And seriously my post above is barely readable. I'm sorry.
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    mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its First Comment
    NO ONE SAVED IT!  You jerks.  ;)

    *ded* at only paying for 34% of the wedding because that's 'her share/side/whatever'.
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    6fsn6fsn member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    I thought we were pretty fair here.
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    mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its First Comment
    The replies were really reasonable.  I was surprised at the DD.
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    DixieNormous330DixieNormous330 member
    5 Love Its First Comment First Anniversary Name Dropper
    I even took out the line where I called her a jerk!!!
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    AuntFloAuntFlo member
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    You all suck for not C&Ping.
    �
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    **O-Face****O-Face** member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    No SHE sucks for DD'ing. :-P
    image
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    6fsn6fsn member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    It went something like: 

    We're having a casual backyard wedding.  Something about a minipill hat (or something liek that, you know I'm holding a minipill baby right now) and a best man wearing all black.

    I'm inviting X number.  DH is inviting Y.  Since I only have 34% of the guests that's all I'm paying for.  DH isn't good with money

    fMIL had the NERVE to tell me I needed to invite the SPOUSES of the people on the list and goodheavens the kids too!  No way.

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    DixieNormous330DixieNormous330 member
    5 Love Its First Comment First Anniversary Name Dropper
    nice recap, 6.
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    PMeg819PMeg819 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    No, she was wearing a mini top hat with a plain dress and her groom was in a top hat and tails. You know, for a backyard wedding with like 50 people.
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    AuntFloAuntFlo member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_problems-with-number-of-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:d357ebca-e8d4-4bbd-ae6e-d303736493bfPost:15543823-53d4-4083-a5fa-9e618990093a">Re: nevermind</a>:
    [QUOTE]No, she was wearing a mini top hat with a plain dress and her groom was in a top hat and tails. You know, for a backyard wedding with like 50 people.
    Posted by PMeg819[/QUOTE]

    <div>That alone makes them sound like douches.   <--- I hate that word but sometimes it's the only one that fits.</div>
    �
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    6fsn6fsn member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker

    MiniTOP hat!  I knew minipill wasn't right.

    I recall it was casual casual casual on 12 acres though.

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    DixieNormous330DixieNormous330 member
    5 Love Its First Comment First Anniversary Name Dropper
    they ONLY have 12 acres so it has to be small.
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    mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_problems-with-number-of-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:d357ebca-e8d4-4bbd-ae6e-d303736493bfPost:15543823-53d4-4083-a5fa-9e618990093a">Re: nevermind</a>:
    [QUOTE]No, she was wearing <strong>a mini top hat </strong>with a plain dress and her groom was in a top hat and tails. You know, for a backyard wedding with like 50 people.
    Posted by PMeg819[/QUOTE]

    What?!  Like a fascinator or something?!
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    AuntFloAuntFlo member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper
    Was it an Alice in Wonderland theme?   
    �
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    VarunaTTVarunaTT member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    Hey, I have an awesome mini tophat, but I have a feeling my and DH's Mad Hatter costumes were more high class than whatever this broad had going on.
    �
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    AuntFloAuntFlo member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper
    edited December 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_problems-with-number-of-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:d357ebca-e8d4-4bbd-ae6e-d303736493bfPost:6bcfc9ad-d979-4ba2-b879-bd1e90c67034">Re: nevermind</a>:
    [QUOTE]Hey, I have an awesome mini tophat, but I have a feeling my and DH's Mad Hatter costumes were more high class than whatever this broad had going on.
    Posted by VarunaTT[/QUOTE]

    <div>Your mini tophat is awesome.   As part of a costume.   </div>
    �
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    DixieNormous330DixieNormous330 member
    5 Love Its First Comment First Anniversary Name Dropper
    I did enjoy that her mini top hate was an important piece of information she HAD to give us.
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    thejucheideathejucheidea member
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_problems-with-number-of-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:47Discussion:d357ebca-e8d4-4bbd-ae6e-d303736493bfPost:15543823-53d4-4083-a5fa-9e618990093a">Re: nevermind</a>:
    [QUOTE]No, she was wearing <strong>a mini top hat with a plain dress</strong> and her groom was in a top hat and tails. You know, for a backyard wedding with like 50 people.
    Posted by PMeg819[/QUOTE]

    <em>Hipsteerrrrrsssssss.</em>

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    allisonwondrlandallisonwondrland
    First Comment
    edited August 2013
    .....
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    6fsn6fsn member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    hehehe
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    thejucheideathejucheidea member
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    Zombie thread, sweet baby jesus.

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    tawillerstawillers member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment

    image

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    VarunaTTVarunaTT member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    edited August 2013
    I so hope the search that lead this thread to be resurrected was "mini top hat".

    image
    �
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