Las Vegas -- After the Wedding?

starryeyed77 · June 2011

I posted this under the budget weddings and a very helpful person suggested I come here.

We are planning a simple outdoor ceremony at a hotel in Las Vegas (most likely Mandalay Bay) and are expecting about 40-50 attendees. We plan to have a local reception when we get home with about 150 friends and family. Since we are planning and paying for the local reception, we are limited with what we can do for those that WANT to come to Las Vegas to see the cermony. (We were planning on bridal party and family... but people have expressed wanting to go so here we are...)

We are looking at casually inviting everyone to a bar/restaurant after the ceremony and buy the first round of drinks as a thank you? Maybe appetizers. The ceremony is at 7 so people can eat before and will most likely just want to socialize and have drinks after and not need to eat necessarily.

I realize that in a perfect world I would feed and drink everyone after but that isn't something we can afford. ....

Does anyone have any ideas of a good place to go who is familiar with Las Vegas? I have been there quite a few times but can't think of anywhere other than maybe the house of blues at mandalay which is one of our ceremony options.

I am open to ideas and suggestions for low budget receptions, I have done a lot of research and everything is $80/head for food and drinks.
Thanks for your help!

LilMissScareAll · June 2011

You need to host more than A drink for those that are spending the hundreds of dollars to travel to Vegas to witness your wedding.
With the size group that you have, you are a prime candidate for having an in-suite reception. If you havn't read the other posts about in-suites, what they are is renting a LARGE suite and bringing in catering, booze, etc. Masterpiece is a popular caterer, but there are other options as well: Jason's Deli, Maggianos, etc. These types of receptions tend to be a bit cheaper than going the traditional reception route.
If you give us more details about your budget, we can help you find an affordable option to properly host your guests

starryeyed77 · June 2011

thank you. I am def open to help!

Is 8:30/9 too late to do a cocktail reception with hors dourves (sp?) or can you do cake and drink reception?

AJF021410 · June 2011

We are doing cake, drinks and heavy apps (materpiececuisine.com) and it will start at 7

smokeybailey · June 2011

Please do more than a cake and drink reception for a DW. If you were at home at the church and doing cake and punch, I'd be okay with that, but inviting people to Vegas and then saying, hey the first round is on us, is not very gracious.

If you do a 7 pm reception, you are done by 7:30 so you can do a dinner reception at 7:30 or you can do heavy apps. Just be sure that you provide enough apps for a meal. If you can't feed and water all guests then reduce the number of your guests. People have also done restaurant and buffet receptions. I am not a fan of dry receptions but you can do that too. I just think if I haul my ass to Vegas you can provide drinks...

Is $80 your budget per head? (or $63 ish if you net out tax and tip)

Also, are you inviting those 150 people to your wedding or are you just going to have a gift grab AHR? I think you should treat your guests who COME to your wedding rather than those at home.

I am doing my best to be nice here.

AJF021410 · June 2011

The nugget was my first choice! I was so sad when I found out they didn't have the kind of suite I was looking for

LilMissScareAll · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_las-vegas-after-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:91Discussion:557a5c55-f528-40ce-abc5-c6c8828fbe31Post:d936a71e-f238-4b0e-81d3-5757a05bc4d5">Re: Las Vegas -- After the Wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]. I am doing my best to be nice here.
Posted by smokeybailey[/QUOTE]

And I can hear you struggling all the way over here <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-tongue-out.gif" border="0" alt="Tongue out" title="Tongue out" />

j_jaye · June 2011

I am having a buffet reception (as in at an actual buffet). It is a really economical way to feed your guests. The one we are going to includes beer and wine. But an insuite can also be a comparable price depending on the number of guests.

I am not a fan of the AHR but my suggestion would be to scale that back to be able to afford a reception after the ceremony.

Sorry I reread your post and am I right that you only intended to invite family and BP but other people have said they wanted to come along? Well if that is the case and they aren't given a formal invitation then tecnically you aren't responsible for watering and feeding them! It would be polite if you could but given that money is tight I would only feed the family and BP.

erinkay81 · June 2011

As Smokey said, if you are having an at home reception you should plan to invite all of those guests to the ceremony. That said, be prepared for more guests than you expect to come to do so. I planned for a realitively small In-Suite and large AHR, when guests found out the wedding would be in Vegas we had a way bigger turnout than expected. We are getting married in 3 weeks and our guest count is at 90... which is much higher than expected, as we are having a 200 person AHR. So just be prepared for that as well.

starryeyed77 · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_las-vegas-after-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:91Discussion:557a5c55-f528-40ce-abc5-c6c8828fbe31Post:d936a71e-f238-4b0e-81d3-5757a05bc4d5">Re: Las Vegas -- After the Wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]Please do more than a cake and drink reception for a DW. If you were at home at the church and doing cake and punch, I'd be okay with that, but inviting people to Vegas and then saying, hey the first round is on us, is not very gracious. If you do a 7 pm reception, you are done by 7:30 so you can do a dinner reception at 7:30 or you can do heavy apps. Just be sure that you provide enough apps for a meal. If you can't feed and water all guests then reduce the number of your guests. People have also done restaurant and buffet receptions. I am not a fan of dry receptions but you can do that too. I just think if I haul my ass to Vegas you can provide drinks... Is $80 your budget per head? (or $63 ish if you net out tax and tip) Also, are you inviting those 150 people to your wedding or are you just going to have a gift grab AHR? I think you should treat your guests who COME to your wedding rather than those at home. I am doing my best to be nice here.
Posted by smokeybailey[/QUOTE]

Its not a "gift grab"....in fact perhaps I should put "no gifts" on the invitation but maybe that would break some rule of etiquette as well? We just want to celebrate with friends is all. Fiance and I have a lot of work friends ....that he would like to celebrate with when we get back. I know this is non-traditional.
I'm sorry you have to try to be nice. I'm not intending to offend anyone, I am new to this and trying to find a way to do the right thing and still get the wedding we want. Maybe this board isn't for me.

starryeyed77 · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_las-vegas-after-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:91Discussion:557a5c55-f528-40ce-abc5-c6c8828fbe31Post:617cc20e-2e15-4c76-a731-8f6123f00a88">Re: Las Vegas -- After the Wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]We are doing cake, drinks and heavy apps (materpiececuisine.com) and it will start at 7
Posted by AJF021410[/QUOTE]

Thank you I will check them out.
Are you doing the in-suite?

j_jaye · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_las-vegas-after-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:91Discussion:557a5c55-f528-40ce-abc5-c6c8828fbe31Post:79b8c950-ac82-47d2-ab04-aa905cd15536">Re: Las Vegas -- After the Wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Las Vegas -- After the Wedding? : Its not a "gift grab"....in fact perhaps I should put "no gifts" on the invitation but maybe that would break some rule of etiquette as well? We just want to celebrate with friends is all. Fiance and I have a lot of work friends ....that he would like to celebrate with when we get back. I know this is non-traditional. I'm sorry you have to try to be nice. I'm not intending to offend anyone, I am new to this and trying to find a way to do the right thing and still get the wedding we want. <strong> Maybe this board isn't for me</strong>.
Posted by starryeyed77[/QUOTE]

Please don't be like that. The diiference between real life and the internet is that people will tell you how it really is. Whilst this can sometimes seem rude and blunt they really are being helpful and trying not to let you made a faux pas.
These guys are a really really useful and supportive group of girls and guy! If you let us know your budget and what help you need these guys will have ideas flying at you quicker than you can say help!

mizutamababy · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_las-vegas-after-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:91Discussion:557a5c55-f528-40ce-abc5-c6c8828fbe31Post:0b5d5d52-f3ca-4611-8c95-9778e30bcb1c">Las Vegas -- After the Wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]Since we are planning and paying for the local reception, we are limited with what we can do for those that WANT to come to Las Vegas to see the cermony. (We were planning on bridal party and family... but people have expressed wanting to go so here we are...)
Posted by starryeyed77[/QUOTE]

If you're not sending out invitations and these people are just basically inviting themselves, I wouldn't worry about providing them drink and food.

I would politely insist that you're only inviting the bridal party and family due to budget and that you regret not being able to invite friends/co-workers/etc. If they still insist on coming, I would just give thanks for their care/support and apologize in a clear way about not being able to accommodate/host them. If they still want to come, knowing that you won't be able to host, well... I don't think you should be that concerned that anything you might try to do for them anyway might or might not be good enough.

That said, brides on TK are generally not fond of a separate ceremony and reception. It doesn't necessarily mean that the boards aren't for you; I'm sure you'll find a whole lot of support on other topics concerning your planning outside of this one.

MizLynn · June 2011

Well, my $0.02 is that if they've invited themselves, then you aren't really responsible for giving them a meal and booze and whole reception treatment.

That said, I do think that it would be kind of rude to tell them 'hey, you're on your own! We're only feeding the BP and family.'

I think a compromise is to do some heavy apps, cake and champagne directly after the reception. Presumably they came to celebrate with you, so let them hang out afterward and raise a glass and eat some cake. I personally don't think the heavy apps even have to be enough to substitute a meal -- as long as you actually feed your BP a proper meal earlier or later on (they'll be hungry and will have been running around with you all day so I think that's only fair to feed them properly as they probably won't have had a chance to eat beforehand -- unlike some of your guests)

You could always treat your BP and family to a show, a special rehearsal dinner, or even a day-after get together as something special just for them. I'm having a pool party where we'll booze up our friends and family and stuff em with tacos, so it doesn' t need to be fancy or even expensive (tacos are one of the cheapest meals you can get!) Just hanging out and enjoying Vegas and a thanks for your support.

HTH

SportsBear47 · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_las-vegas-after-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:91Discussion:557a5c55-f528-40ce-abc5-c6c8828fbe31Post:79b8c950-ac82-47d2-ab04-aa905cd15536">Re: Las Vegas -- After the Wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Las Vegas -- After the Wedding? : Its not a "gift grab"....in fact perhaps I should put "no gifts" on the invitation but maybe that would break some rule of etiquette as well? We just want to celebrate with friends is all. Fiance and I have a lot of work friends ....that he would like to celebrate with when we get back. I know this is non-traditional. I'm sorry you have to try to be nice. I'm not intending to offend anyone, I am new to this and trying to find a way to do the right thing and still get the wedding we want. Maybe this board isn't for me.
Posted by starryeyed77[/QUOTE]

Being the one that referred you to this board, I meant for you to receive ideas on how you can treat your traveling guests to food and drink to thank them.

The AHR you are planning is not true to etiquette and rude to those guests you are not inviting to the actual DW. On all of these boards you will receive matter-of-fact information from strangers. In the end, it is up to you to decide. Please do not run from the boards because strangers disagree with your plans. Advice is advice and this is what you received.

I totally understand wanting a AHR. We originally wanted a AHR, but it just is not in the budget. Therefore, we cut the guest list to the DW and are treating our 38 guests to a fabulous weekend to thank them for taking the time and spending the money to travel and share in our wedding. That means more to us than the AHR anyway.

If your heart is set on the AHR, maybe a DW is not the best decision. Perhaps staying home and having a full-out reception is what is truly in your heart. Just my 2 cents.

ahhhitsshannyn · June 2011

Skip the AHR and invite everyone to Vegas. Please please please host something for your guests that spend a lot of money and have to take time off work to celebrate with you.

Yawnnnnn it is too early for this. Let me wake up and I might have a better response, sorry.

kara811 · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_las-vegas-after-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:91Discussion:557a5c55-f528-40ce-abc5-c6c8828fbe31Post:1904f05e-0b09-4c02-82b4-f3e004b95a63">Re: Las Vegas -- After the Wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]Skip the AHR and invite everyone to Vegas. Please please please host something for your guests that spend a lot of money and have to take time off work to celebrate with you. Yawnnnnn it is too early for this. Let me wake up and I might have a better response, sorry.
Posted by ahhhitsshannyn[/QUOTE]
<div>
</div><div>Agree. Do in suite with at least heavy apps.</div>

queenklm33 · June 2011

THe AHR only makes sense to me when the couple elopes and its just the two of them at the actual ceremony.
As pps said, have the wedding you can afford in Vegas or have the wedding you can afford at home, don't do things in both places.
Mnay of us here are very budget conscious and understand your dilemma, you will get some great inexpensive or cost saving ideas if you stay on this board.

nycheryl · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_las-vegas-after-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:91Discussion:557a5c55-f528-40ce-abc5-c6c8828fbe31Post:4dcb2898-b2c5-42c9-81e8-12b4e1e286d0">Re: Las Vegas -- After the Wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]THe AHR only makes sense to me when the couple elopes and its just the two of them at the actual ceremony.
Posted by queenklm33[/QUOTE]

I think this might be a good idea for you guys, too. Invite your parents and two closest friends, then have your AHR in your hometown.

I'm not a fan of AHRs either. We decided to invite our closest friends/family and go all out in Vegas. I'm really looking forward to treating this group really well (open bar, dinner), after all they've done for us. And, honestly, it's not that expensive. Worth saving our pennies for a year to do the right thing.

daniela0984 · June 2011

We are doing exactly what you are planning. An afternoon ceremony with 30-45 guests and a cocktail reception. We are doing apps, unlimited beer and wine, and dessert at Trevi at CP for approx $2500 (and that includes tax and gratuity). I have other friend coming out. They are coming to the ceremony and meeting up after the reception to go out on the strip. I also can't afford to feed everyone wanting to come but all of my "extra" guest are completely understanding that the reception is for family only. Its your wedding and its non-tradtional....you can pretty much do whatever you want! Good luck!

smokeybailey · June 2011

An AHR makes sense to me only if you invited 100 people and some subset could not attend. Perhaps THEN you would have an AHR for those who couldn't attend.

If you choose to elope, you are choosing to forego the other trappings of a wedding. If you choose to have a small wedding, you will have a small reception.

If you want to throw a party, then go ahead, but a reception with toasts, cake, special dances, after you have already decided to do something that excludes me doesn't sit right. If you want me there then invite me to the actual event.

My grandma cannot come to my wedding so afterwards I am going to her house to show her pictures and maybe even try on the dress for her. I'll bring in lunch and maybe have a couple other folks over. However, those people are all invited to the wedding. That's the closest to an AHR I can imagine.

[Deleted User] · June 2011

I agree with the idea of an in-suite reception with catering. Or, if you do want to keep costs down without having to worry about clean-up, go to a nice buffet! There are great ones on the strip for $25-35 per person.!!

lolahbelle · June 2011

Does anyone know of any suites in which you can bring in your own food and beverage? How about sneaking it in???
Thanks!

starryeyed77 · June 2011

Thats for all the input everyone, I truly appreciate your time. I will now be inviting everyone to Vegas wedding per your advice.

I'm researching a venue to do beer and wine, appetizers and cake after the 7 pm ceremony.

As for the AHR, my fiance is pretty set on having something....I will see if we can just call it a party with food and drinks. He really wants a chance to celebrate with coworkers that cannot attend. I'll talk to him about it and see where that goes.

starryeyed77 · June 2011

We talked and I got him to agree to ditch the AHR, woohoo! We agreed he could just do an informal bbq with some friends that couldn't go.

j_jaye · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_las-vegas-after-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:91Discussion:557a5c55-f528-40ce-abc5-c6c8828fbe31Post:898847a4-aadf-498a-a86f-e53a6c2dd3da">Re: Las Vegas -- After the Wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]Does anyone know of any suites in which you can bring in your own food and beverage? How about sneaking it in??? Thanks!
Posted by lolahbelle[/QUOTE]

Most people use Mandalay Bay's Vista suite. No problems so far with outside vendors.

Natrasha · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_nevada-las-vegas_las-vegas-after-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:91Discussion:557a5c55-f528-40ce-abc5-c6c8828fbe31Post:b5794cc0-689d-4c6a-977e-c00cc83d08bd">Re: Las Vegas -- After the Wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]Thats for all the input everyone, I truly appreciate your time. I will now be inviting everyone to Vegas wedding per your advice. I'm researching a venue to do beer and wine, appetizers and cake after the 7 pm ceremony. As for the AHR, my fiance is pretty set on having something....I will see if we can just call it a party with food and drinks. He really wants a chance to celebrate with coworkers that cannot attend. I'll talk to him about it and see where that goes.
Posted by starryeyed77[/QUOTE]

Hello, reasonable newbie! I'm glad you found everything helpful. There are a lot of great resources and experiences on this board.

I will say I am in the same situation as you over the AHR. We may or may not have one, depending on how many people make it to Vegas. And if we do have one, we may combine it with FI's 30th birthday so we can invite extra people (like his coworkers- who were too numerous to invite) and just have it be a chill party, with the only wedding related thing being our album for people to look at, if they so desire.

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