I'm not pregnant!!!

KellyT22

Fiance and I just got engaged - yay!!!

We're both in our 30s, and I was previously engaged (so this ain't my first rodeo). We were together 7 months before the proposal, but it felt right to get engaged.

Of course, less than 24 hours after getting engaged I have been asked by a few people if I am pregnant (I'm not)! Why are people so rude?!? We got engaged because we love each other and want to be married, not because we feel obligated by pregnancy.

thisismynickname2

Maybe have your FI throw a "Not a Father Day" party and drop some major hints.... LOL http://how-i-met-your-mother.wikia.com/wiki/Barney's_Blog:_Not_A_Father's_Day Sorry you're dealing with that!

Marzipan13

Congratulations on your engagement!  Welcome to the madness! lol

Ugh, I hate when people ask that.  Last summer when my aunt asked me the date of my wedding, and I said "September 13, 2014", her response was, "Oh good, so you're not pregnant."



etf: syntax

loveislouder

Ugh, people asked me that too.  It pisses me off.

goldchocobo.defunct635829490514903826

I'm sorry to hear this.  People just don't want to believe people get married because they are happy and want to, not because they are forced to for any reason...

I thought I would get asked this!  FI and I have been together since 2005 and got engaged in 2013.  I swore someone was going to come out of the woodworks and ask because that must be the ONLY reason we are getting married now, right?  *sigh*

theycallmelinz

I got the same thing. Many of my friends said, "I wondered if you were pregnant or getting married or both!"

Nope. Just love my honey and want to get married. 

climbingsingle

I got that too. FI proposed to me after 5 months. People really can be jerks. 

tammym1001

DH and I were together for 8 years when we got engaged. After we got engaged I was kind of MIA in his friend group for awhile. It wasn't anything that had to do with them, I had some other stuff going on. I went out with them and one guy asked me how the baby was. I was like what???? He said well you don't look pregnant now, but I heard you were so I figured you already had the baby. So not only was I pregnant, but I had apparently already had this imaginary baby. LOL People are stupid! I guess someone must have started the rumor since we finally got engaged after so long.

gothic_fairy60

And after the wedding it doesn't stop. Our wedding is next month (yay) and I lost count of how many times I have been asked when we will be having a baby. Edited: because I can't type today.

RebeccaFlower

My parents got engaged in July and married in October of 1981. Literally everything thought my mom was pregnant. Joke was on them because my brother wasn't born for eight years after! 

CMGragain

If someone is rude enough to ask you if you got engaged because you are pregnant, you raise your eyebrows, assume a shocked expression, and say "Why would you ask me that?"  It worked 38 years ago, and it still works!

Fairyjen1

   One nice thing about being 44 is no one has asked me if I'm pregnant. They haven't asked when we plan to have kids either. I guess they figured that ship has sailed!

missdelilah

It happened to me too.  Not only the "are you pregnant" questions, but a snarky neighbor running in to some out of town friends of ours the week of wedding and telling them I was pregnant.  It was really uncomfortable for then FI and I to get the "why haven't you told any of us yet!" stares and comments, and then awkward to explain that said neighbor was mistaken (although I'd go with lying with intent to cause a nuisance).

I'm sorry you're going through this too.  Hopefully it dies down after a while.

PrincessOfHavoc

Single benefit from being able to get too close to anime eyes if I try....

Rudy McRudersen - Oh, when are you having babies....

Me - *get big eyes* *huge gasp* Did you really just ask about my SEX life? In public? *start with crocodile tears and sniffling* Why would anyone be so rude to talk about my sex life in public, where strangers can hear? I need to go compose myself. *swipe at tears and add quivering lip*

The same person never asks me a second time as of yet.

Marzipan13

Another (fucking fantastic) piece of advice I read on these boards was the bolded response:

"Are you pregnant?"
"How much is your annual income?  How much do you weigh? Oh, I'm sorry, I thought we were asking each other personal questions."

Actually, I've been starting to respond with "Are YOU pregnant?!" to the pregnancy question.  Jesus, people, I'll have babies when we're good 'n ready.

sarahufl

My cousin had twins on her first wedding anniversary. TONS of people were like "OH!! Now I see why you got married!"

Um, that isn't how it works.

I am fully prepared for the onslaught of baby questions after my wedding (NEXT WEEK!)

MamaAlly89

The pregnant question gets so old! I had a bunch of people ask me since we had set our wedding date for only 7 months after we got engaged. Are you preggers? No bitch, I just wanted to have my wedding when I was on break from school so I didn't have to worry about silly things like homework. Thanks for asking though, when its really none of your business!

KatieinBkln

I think if anyone asks you this, you should just stare at them for a good 10-15 seconds. Then say, "That pause was pregnant." Then just walk away.

rooz103

My favorite response is "No, but if you're really that interested, I can let you know each time we try". Haven't had a chance to use it yet, disappointingly.

hales2010

People started asking me that recently because I started talking about just having a destination wedding and just coming back and having a wedding reception somewhere. People were like "You do not need to give up your wedding dreams because of a pregnancy" and I am sitting here like -_-. I just want to get married and it started sounding like a good idea.

larrygaga

I had a person tell me it's good to marry before I get too old.

I'm 22.

southernbelle0915

sarahufl said:

My cousin had twins on her first wedding anniversary. TONS of people were like "OH!! Now I see why you got married!"

Um, that isn't how it works.

I am fully prepared for the onslaught of baby questions after my wedding (NEXT WEEK!)

We got baby questions from multiple people AT our wedding reception. "So when are you going start trying for babies"

What I said: "Oh wow. I'm really not sure, we're just enjoying the wedding tonight..."

What I wish I said: "Oh wow. Well, we've been married for about an hour, so I guess we should start trying right! Wooo!! Please excuse me so I can go get him warmed up on the dance floor. *wink!* Watch this - I promise you a baby in 9 months..."

misshart00

I had friends that were engaged and he got a job somewhere so they planned a wedding in 4 weeks so they could move together and not worry about when they would be getting married, etc. On her wedding day, she posted on Facebook, "I'm not pregnant! Stop asking!"

Marzipan13

southernbelle0915 said:

sarahufl said:

My cousin had twins on her first wedding anniversary. TONS of people were like "OH!! Now I see why you got married!"

Um, that isn't how it works.

I am fully prepared for the onslaught of baby questions after my wedding (NEXT WEEK!)

We got baby questions from multiple people AT our wedding reception. "So when are you going start trying for babies"

What I said: "Oh wow. I'm really not sure, we're just enjoying the wedding tonight..."

What I wish I said: "Oh wow. Well, we've been married for about an hour, so I guess we should start trying right! Wooo!! Please excuse me so I can go get him warmed up on the dance floor. *wink!* Watch this - I promise you a baby in 9 months..."

LOL

FI is skittish as it is about babies, so I warned him that we're going to be getting The Question around / at / after the wedding.  We're having fun coming up with clever / asshole-ish responses.

sarahufl

Marzipan13 said:

southernbelle0915 said:

sarahufl said:

My cousin had twins on her first wedding anniversary. TONS of people were like "OH!! Now I see why you got married!"

Um, that isn't how it works.

I am fully prepared for the onslaught of baby questions after my wedding (NEXT WEEK!)

We got baby questions from multiple people AT our wedding reception. "So when are you going start trying for babies"

What I said: "Oh wow. I'm really not sure, we're just enjoying the wedding tonight..."

What I wish I said: "Oh wow. Well, we've been married for about an hour, so I guess we should start trying right! Wooo!! Please excuse me so I can go get him warmed up on the dance floor. *wink!* Watch this - I promise you a baby in 9 months..."

LOL

FI is skittish as it is about babies, so I warned him that we're going to be getting The Question around / at / after the wedding.  We're having fun coming up with clever / asshole-ish responses.

SIB:

My reply would be that we will start practicing, so just make sure your hotel room isn't next to ours.

People can't mind their own business.

goldchocobo.defunct635829490514903826

larrygaga said:

I had a person tell me it's good to marry before I get too old.

I'm 22.

I'm 31.  I guess all my eggs are just rotten and useless.  I'll be a TERRIBLE wife!

kerbohl

@KatieinBkIn Slow clap for yours . . . I may use that. I may use others suggested by PP as well - some good responses! My response has generally been the truth, except to MIL, in that I just say "I don't want kids". Or that my nephews are enough for me.

beethery

I always go for a food baby response.

"Currently carrying a food baby. Now, if you'll excuse me, I think it's time that I give birth."

and then mosey on.

sarahonlife

My darling husband thought it was hilarious to announce to my mom and brothers the night before the wedding that we would be having a baby.  To be clear, I'm very much not pregnant.  This was NOT hilarious.  He didn't understand the shit I've been getting for years about not having babies yet.  At least I think he understands a little better now after all the ridiculous comments we've gotten since then.

And now I understand why a lot of people don't want kids at their weddings.  I couldn't get within ten feet of one without someone exclaiming "Oh, you look like a natural with kids!"

larrygaga

goldchocobo said:

larrygaga said:

I had a person tell me it's good to marry before I get too old.

I'm 22.

I'm 31.  I guess all my eggs are just rotten and useless.  I'll be a TERRIBLE wife!

You should probably just give up on everything. LOL

tammym1001

goldchocobo said:

larrygaga said:

I had a person tell me it's good to marry before I get too old.

I'm 22.

I'm 31.  I guess all my eggs are just rotten and useless.  I'll be a TERRIBLE wife!

I'm 35 and just got married in May so what does that make me???? Crap!!!