Keep in mind while reading this, that my mother in law had 500 guests at her wedding. Sorry this is long!
Okay, so my fiance and I agreed on a small-medium wedding 175-200 people at a venue that charges $70 a person. We only wanted people that we knew and who have been apart of our lives and our relationship and the venue is a hotel so the price covers everything including accommodations for out of town guests. Everyone, including my future mother in law agreed on this plan. So I signed the contract and my parents put a deposit down.
However, a few weeks ago my fiance tells me that his mom wanted to know if I wanted to have my reception at another venue for $25 a person so that way its cheaper and we can invite more guests. I was a little bit upset because she agreed with the original idea and now she wants to change it? My fiance and I vetoed that idea since we already signed a contract and put money down.
Then last week, she tells my fiance that she wants to hold a second reception the next day (she would pay for everything) with guests that weren't invited to the original wedding. Her thought is that the cheaper it is per person the more people she can invite. My fiance told her no when she asked to him, he didn't want a second party the next day. Then she went behind his back and asked me about it which put me in an awkward position, she goes on to tell me that with a $70 per person price tag she can't invite everyone she wants to invite, and wants to invite a lot more of her family and friends (people that my fiance and I have never met) because she wants to make sure we have everything we need and because a lot of people "owe" her this. I told her I would think about it and let her know.
There are a few problems I have with this idea... 1) I don't understand her logic as to not being able to afford to invite more people with a $70 per person price tag, but she can afford to throw a whole other reception 2) I don't want a second reception the next day, because I want to be able to relax the day after and be with my husband 3) I don't want to celebrate my wedding with a bunch of people I don't know, I believe a wedding should be a close, intimate event with close family and friends who know you as a couple and who have been an influence on your life.
Ultimately, my fiance told his mother we did not want the second reception, that it wasn't about the price, it could be $10 a person and we still wouldn't want a huge wedding with a bunch of people. I feel bad about about all this, but this is our day and we should make the decision.
Did we make the right choice? Or should I have just sucked it up and let her throw the party?