Appropriate wording to list hosted drinks

PrettyGirlLost · September 2014

TerriHugg said:
I have a serious question.

Are restaurants/bars/etc usually willing to move all drinks the host is not paying for? For example, if at the wedding, you are paying for wine and beer does that mean the reception venue typically removes any traces of vodka, rum, etc. from behind the bar so it won't be seen by wedding guests?

How realistic is it for us to expect that a restaurant or whatever will be ok with moving all their stock from the bar because you decided you aren't planning to offer that to the guests?

If so, I didn't know venues were willing to do such a thing.

It's not realistic at all.

It's also not realistic to expect the bar to refuse to serve anything that isn't being hosted. . . I highly doubt they would turn away business like that.

It's more realistic to list what you are hosting and that ppl will choose to drink for free rather than paying for crap tgat isn't hosted. I highly doubt any rational person would consider that a cash bar.

lyndausvi · September 2014

PrettyGirlLost said:

I have a serious question.

Are restaurants/bars/etc usually willing to move all drinks the host is not paying for? For example, if at the wedding, you are paying for wine and beer does that mean the reception venue typically removes any traces of vodka, rum, etc. from behind the bar so it won't be seen by wedding guests?

How realistic is it for us to expect that a restaurant or whatever will be ok with moving all their stock from the bar because you decided you aren't planning to offer that to the guests?

If so, I didn't know venues were willing to do such a thing.
It's not realistic at all. It's also not realistic to expect the bar to refuse to serve anything that isn't being hosted. . . I highly doubt they would turn away business like that. It's more realistic to list what you are hosting and that ppl will choose to drink for free rather than paying for crap tgat isn't hosted. I highly doubt any rational person would consider that a cash bar.

I've never been to a cash bar. However, if I saw paid and non-paid options I would at the very least considered it a partial cash-bar and still give a side-eye and think a little less of the hosts. Out-of-sight out-of-mind kind of thing. The fact I see the non-hosted options might make me WANT the non-hosted options.

It would be like getting the full menu but the hosts tell you you can only pick certain items. If I got a menu with only the 3 options I would pick one. I don't want to see what I'm not allowed. Same with the bar. I don't want to see what is not hosted. It's a tease.

That all said, in STB case a list is really the only option.

On another note STB bashing needs to stop. It's past getting old.

AlexisA01 · September 2014

AddieCake said:

I don't get the continued need to jab at Mrs. E over her PPD. She's having one. We all know it. She doesn't care. She's made that abundantly clear. What is the point of continuing to bring it up and harp on it? Also, people grouse about "piling" on in some threads, but nobody ever minds piling on her over the same thing every time she posts?

I agree. Why do posters feel the need to pester her!?. All it does is create unnecessary drama and arguments.

PrettyGirlLost · September 2014

lyndausvi said:

PrettyGirlLost said:

I have a serious question.

Are restaurants/bars/etc usually willing to move all drinks the host is not paying for? For example, if at the wedding, you are paying for wine and beer does that mean the reception venue typically removes any traces of vodka, rum, etc. from behind the bar so it won't be seen by wedding guests?

How realistic is it for us to expect that a restaurant or whatever will be ok with moving all their stock from the bar because you decided you aren't planning to offer that to the guests?

If so, I didn't know venues were willing to do such a thing.
It's not realistic at all. It's also not realistic to expect the bar to refuse to serve anything that isn't being hosted. . . I highly doubt they would turn away business like that. It's more realistic to list what you are hosting and that ppl will choose to drink for free rather than paying for crap tgat isn't hosted. I highly doubt any rational person would consider that a cash bar.

I've never been to a cash bar. However, if I saw paid and non-paid options I would at the very least considered it a partial cash-bar and still give a side-eye and think a little less of the hosts. Out-of-sight out-of-mind kind of thing. The fact I see the non-hosted options might make me WANT the non-hosted options.

It would be like getting the full menu but the hosts tell you you can only pick certain items. If I got a menu with only the 3 options I would pick one. I don't want to see what I'm not allowed. Same with the bar. I don't want to see what is not hosted. It's a tease.

That all said, in STB case a list is really the only option.

On another note STB bashing needs to stop. It's past getting old.

I've been to cash bar weddings, so having a limited bar where there are also non hosted drinks available would not make me think I was at a cash bar event. If you (general) see something that isn't hosted that you would like, and you choose to order it, that's on you. I wouldn't see that as any reflection on the hosts and I wouldn't think they had a partial cash bar for it. You just chose not to partake of the free, hosted options.

I have never been to an event where the venue removed alcohol that wasn't hosted. I don't think ours is going to, and if ppl side eye us after hosting 5 wines, 3 beers, and a signature drink, then I think there's something wrong with them! I think the bar staff is instructed by the venue not to serve anything that isn't hosted, however. I believe we discussed this during one of our meetings with the DOC.

mrs4everhart · September 2014

PrettyGirlLost said:

lyndausvi said:

PrettyGirlLost said:

I have a serious question.

Are restaurants/bars/etc usually willing to move all drinks the host is not paying for? For example, if at the wedding, you are paying for wine and beer does that mean the reception venue typically removes any traces of vodka, rum, etc. from behind the bar so it won't be seen by wedding guests?

How realistic is it for us to expect that a restaurant or whatever will be ok with moving all their stock from the bar because you decided you aren't planning to offer that to the guests?

If so, I didn't know venues were willing to do such a thing.
It's not realistic at all. It's also not realistic to expect the bar to refuse to serve anything that isn't being hosted. . . I highly doubt they would turn away business like that. It's more realistic to list what you are hosting and that ppl will choose to drink for free rather than paying for crap tgat isn't hosted. I highly doubt any rational person would consider that a cash bar.

I've never been to a cash bar. However, if I saw paid and non-paid options I would at the very least considered it a partial cash-bar and still give a side-eye and think a little less of the hosts. Out-of-sight out-of-mind kind of thing. The fact I see the non-hosted options might make me WANT the non-hosted options.

It would be like getting the full menu but the hosts tell you you can only pick certain items. If I got a menu with only the 3 options I would pick one. I don't want to see what I'm not allowed. Same with the bar. I don't want to see what is not hosted. It's a tease.

That all said, in STB case a list is really the only option.

On another note STB bashing needs to stop. It's past getting old.

I've been to cash bar weddings, so having a limited bar where there are also non hosted drinks available would not make me think I was at a cash bar event. If you (general) see something that isn't hosted that you would like, and you choose to order it, that's on you. I wouldn't see that as any reflection on the hosts and I wouldn't think they had a partial cash bar for it. You just chose not to partake of the free, hosted options.

I have never been to an event where the venue removed alcohol that wasn't hosted. I don't think ours is going to, and if ppl side eye us after hosting 5 wines, 3 beers, and a signature drink, then I think there's something wrong with them! I think the bar staff is instructed by the venue not to serve anything that isn't hosted, however. I believe we discussed this during one of our meetings with the DOC.

It's been my experience with parties (from the perspective of running a venue) that 99.9% of people will always drink the hosted option in instances like these where there are hosted options but they could pay for something different if they wanted to. There's the occasional guest that really would prefer something different, or really has expensive taste, and they purchased their own. I think that will be the case with your reception and my AHR - the vast majority of people will drink the hosted options, either to be polite or because it's free, or both.

Rarely is it feasible to only display what is being paid for by the host, depending upon the type of venue.

But if I were to attend an event with a full bar available but only certain things were hosted, I wouldn't think of it as a cash bar either. Cash bar to me is if I want ANY alcohol I have to pay for it (or N/A bev in some cases, but that's so appalling to me I'm going to pretend that doesn't happen).

lyndausvi · September 2014

I can honestly say I've never attended or worked a wedding where the options on the display were not hosted. Not one. If you could see it, it was hosted.

Doesn't mean every wedding I've attended was a fully stocked bar. Only the items within view were always hosted.

It's just an odd concept to me to have even a partial cash bar.

mrs4everhart · September 2014

lyndausvi said:

I can honestly say I've never attended or worked a wedding where the options on the display were not hosted. Not one. If you could see it, it was hosted.

Doesn't mean every wedding I've attended was a fully stocked bar. Only the items within view were always hosted.

It's just an odd concept to me to have even a partial cash bar.

I think the venue plays a huge part in this. Banquet facilities, or other venues that are basically empty shells (like ballrooms) until stocked with everything from tables/chairs to plates to booze, it makes sense that everything displayed is hosted. Otherwise, why stock the bar with it?

If the venue is an operating bar/restaurant it makes the removal or display a lot trickier.

At the venue I run we have two private rooms that are shells, and several spaces that are normal operating full-service bar/restaurant space, although they can be rented as well (for full or partial buyouts). The rooms that are shells have to be stocked from scratch, the others don't. So depending on what type of drink package a client wants will play a huge part in what we can or will do with the displays.

I'm certainly hoping that our guests will take us up on the hosted options, because it's our pleasure to be able to share a good time and some drinks with them. But yes, if there's some folks that want Don Julio 1942, they're on their own with that! (And I secretly hope they buy me one while they're at the bar. I kid).

Appropriate wording to list hosted drinks

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