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I got boo'd on wedding wire for this... second opinions PLZ

So here's the story. "FH" and I are already technically married. We eloped back in April due to me just wanting to move in with him already (we were engaged), and my very religious parents being very much against it. Here's the thing, most of the people attending the wedding have no idea that we're married and will absolutely think that they're witnessing us getting married. Currently, the only people that know are my parents (but not FH's) and my MOH. I think it's justified since the "signing of the papers" back in April is not really of any significance to us. Sure we acknowledge it between us but there's nothing really "special" about that day. We literally did it as a legality to make my parents happy before I moved in with him. We are not wearing our rings yet and will celebrate our anniversary on the date of the upcoming wedding.
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Re: I got boo'd on wedding wire for this... second opinions PLZ

  • ILoveBeachMusicILoveBeachMusic Indiana member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    Everything that @anidorikiladra said. You are being dishonest. If being married before moving in was that big of a deal (which I totally understand) you could have waited to move in until your planned wedding day - which is not your wedding day.
    ernursejgeebee908cowgirl8238kittykyat
  • Please change your idea to a celebration of marriage and get rid of the fake ceremony and trappings of a wedding. You are already married. Do not have a fake ceremony and attempt to pull one over your guests. I would be irritated if I ever found out.
    eileenrobOurWildKingdom
  • BOOOOOOOOOO!!

    Just have a celebration of marriage party.
    SaintPaulGalSP29monkeysipcowgirl8238
  • Sorry, I'm booing you too. Nice try though.
    image
  • lyndausvi said:
    Ironring said:
    How did the day mean nothing but also make it okay to move in together?
    My exact thought. It obviously meant something since you made a major life change (moving in) on account of it. 

    If that was just for your parents sake, then you should have grown up and been an adult about your relationship. Move in or don't move before you get married, but it should be your decision. But either way, don't lie to the people close to you. 
    The sex alone would make it something, no?
    My guess from her post is that they weren't waiting anyways. It didn't sound like they cared if they were married before living together but did it for the sake of her parents (meaning sex before marriage also probably wasn't something they were worried about). 
    kimmiinthemitten
  • Jells2dot0Jells2dot0 Cowtown mod
    Moderator Eighth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    monkeysip said:
    How did the day mean nothing but also make it okay to move in together?
    This is what I never understand about these PPDs for supposed "christian" reasons.

    First, like STAR said above, the day is somehow official enough for them to move into together, but not official enough for it to "be important" or tell people about.  Riiiggghhhtt.

    Second, the parents think it's immoral to live together before marriage and yet perfectly fine to lie to people about it?  Stop with your fake, hypocritical christianity.

    So, they are going to get married so they can appease the religious parents, yet they get married outside of a church?? I can't imagine mom and dad are okay with that. The church won't look too kindly on any of this as well!

     







    madamerwinPrettyGirlLostcowgirl8238
  • monkeysip said:
    How did the day mean nothing but also make it okay to move in together?
    This is what I never understand about these PPDs for supposed "christian" reasons.

    First, like STAR said above, the day is somehow official enough for them to move into together, but not official enough for it to "be important" or tell people about.  Riiiggghhhtt.

    Second, the parents think it's immoral to live together before marriage and yet perfectly fine to lie to people about it?  Stop with your fake, hypocritical christianity.

    So, they are going to get married so they can appease the religious parents, yet they get married outside of a church?? I can't imagine mom and dad are okay with that. The church won't look too kindly on any of this as well!
    Depends which church. Mine (protestant, not catholic) is fairly conservative but has no issues with weddings not within a church building. Of course, the weddings need to actually be legal and legit with a legal officiant and an actual marriage license....
    ILoveBeachMusic
  • climbingwifeclimbingwife NYC 'burbs member
    10000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I'm at a loss for words. 


    Oh wait. No I'm not. 

    Boooooooooooooo! 

    You should do some soul searching to figure out why you think it's OK to lie to your loved ones, including your husband's parents! Holy shit. What do you think their reaction will be? Wow, girl. Good luck. 

    OurWildKingdomMairePoppy
  • What's your question? Why are you posting this? Are you suddenly feeling bad? Or did someone say something to you? It appears you've been fine with this decision for quite a few months now so why have you posted this on two different wedding forums? What's different now?
    OurWildKingdomSP29cowgirl8238
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