Invitations vs. actual attendance

marriedlady1212

I hear that you should expect about 2/3 of your guest list to show up. To the brides already married: how many people did you invite? How many people showed up? How many people RSVPed yes and didn't show?

[Deleted User]

153 invited

120 final head count including bride & groom & vendors

4 people that didn't come to the wedding that had RSVP yes

HisGirlFriday13

We invited 152, and had 99 RSVP yes. Three then didn't come, and one brought a guest unexpectedly. The 99 included our vendors.

We planned on 100% attendance as we built our budget, though.

monkeysip

We budgeted for and invited 85, but only 57 RSVP'd yes.  Then 1 didn't show.  

Always budget for 100% because we've definitely had ladies on here who got that.  But the benefit is that if you over-budget, and have a lot of declines that we did, then you just get to save money!  More money to save or put towards your honeymoon!

WedReMix13

I sent out 35 invites to 165 people and only 15 showed up. 

ETA: Corrected number of actual invites

KatWAG

We invited 275, We had 235 at the wedding. 4 no shows but it was a family trying to fly out on standby and it didnt work. So they didnt make it.

However, we had room in our budget and our venue for every single guest.

dramamonkey

Like PP said... budget for 100%

We had 165 invited
107 headcount to venue (incl b&g and vendors)

Had 6 no shows.

southernbelle0915

We invited about 225 and ended up with 175. Ours was more or less a DW wedding though - his family lives on the other side of the country and we did the wedding on the opposite side of the state from where we live. We were surprised at how many people actually came. We had a few no shows, but we also had a few people show up who RSVP'd no (still don't get it but whatever).

Always count on 100% attendance. There are a bunch of threads on here of brides who didn't and they're scrambling at the last minute cutting everything from favors, to cake, to honeymoon expenses. Or worse, their venue doesn't fit everyone.... 

PolarBearFitz

WedReMix13 said:

I sent out 165 invites and only 15 showed up. 

@WedReMix13 - Not to pry and be a Nosey Nancy but was this because the invites were not sent far enough in advance or because of a different reason?

marriedlady1212

When we found our reception venue, they told us they had 20 tables that seat 8-10 people. We have invited 194 people. Now we are told they have 20 tables that seat 8 and have 160 chairs. So! We have a back up plan to rent more tables and chairs if needed, but we are praying only 160 people RSVP yes.

winelover123

We invited 115 and I think 90 RSVPed yes. We had a few people decline, but mostly people declined to bring a plus one, which is why our numbers are low. We had 6 people no show.

Belthil

Always plan for 100% attendance. You don't want to be panicking the week before your wedding if you've planned for 2/3 attendance and almost 100% replied yes. You need to have room and be able to host everyone you send an invitation to.

We invited 132 people and we ended up with 102 guests, myself and H and two vendors. We had one no-show. We gave anyone that was single a plus one and I think only one elected to bring a guest.

ei34

Everyone kept telling me 20% of your guests will say no.  Don't believe it!  Hubby and I invited 170, and we hosted 174. 

monkeysip

marriedlady1212 said:

When we found our reception venue, they told us they had 20 tables that seat 8-10 people. We have invited 194 people. Now we are told they have 20 tables that seat 8 and have 160 chairs. So! We have a back up plan to rent more tables and chairs if needed, but we are praying only 160 people RSVP yes.

I would call around to rental companies and see how far in advance you need to order.  If you don't find out how many rsvp'd yes until 2 weeks before your wedding, that may not be enough time to get the tables/chairs.  

csuave

158 people invited; 50 declined.  All declines were OOT.  Total OOT invites out of the 158 were 107.  With the majority of the invites as OOT we expected to have declines (but didn't plan on it) but even still decline rate for OOT was slightly higher than expected.

We assumed everyone would attend when considering space and budget.  However, in hindsight I wish I would have done some higher decline rate math (making assumptions about declines in advance) to more aggressively negotiate our required minimum with the venue.  We were under by only a little and chose some upgrades to make up the difference, which was fine.  But having the money back in our pocket when people declined would have also been nice.

 

JeeGooDowster

As PPs have said, expect 100% attendance for budgeting. We invited 300 people, 230 showed up, 1 no-show and 1 who said he might not be able to come due to military obligations but ended up attending (did not include him in the acceptance)...so it ended up being a wash.

crunchymamaof2

Always plan for 100% and make sure you leave wiggle room for new relationships in case they

Always plan for 100% and make sure you leave wiggle room for new relationships in case they happen. I also personally wouldn't invite more than 175 people if my venue could only hold 200 max. Cutting it too close if you have 100% attendance. I've read horror stories about that once or twice on here.

We invited around 83 (3-4 of those were courtesy invites that we knew 110% wouldn't come). Including our family of 4 we were expecting 75 until one couple had to cancel, thankfully before final counts were due. So then, again including us, we were expecting 73 and two couples were no shows so we had more like 65 actually attend.

Simky906

I was recently in the wedding of a close family member; she invited 245 and 235 attended. Which was a problem since the church (at max capacity) could seat 225 so the people who arrived late had to stand at the back. Plus, there was no where near enough seating at the reception so I had to stand to eat my dinner. So please plan for 100% attendance.

monkeysip

Abbyb987 said:

I was recently in the wedding of a close family member; she invited 245 and 235 attended. Which was a problem since the church (at max capacity) could seat 225 so the people who arrived late had to stand at the back. Plus, there was no where near enough seating at the reception so I had to stand to eat my dinner. So please plan for 100% attendance.

That's horrible.  We actually invited 5 over our max capacity, but that was with having a dance floor.  Worse case scenario, we would have just had to have a smaller dance floor (totally doable at our venue).  It's horrible to make people stand for your ceremony or reception.

cowgirl8238

acove2006 said:

Always plan for 100% and make sure you leave wiggle room for new relationships in case they

Always plan for 100% and make sure you leave wiggle room for new relationships in case they happen. I also personally wouldn't invite more than 175 people if my venue could only hold 200 max. Cutting it too close if you have 100% attendance. I've read horror stories about that once or twice on here.

We invited around 83 (3-4 of those were courtesy invites that we knew 110% wouldn't come). Including our family of 4 we were expecting 75 until one couple had to cancel, thankfully before final counts were due. So then, again including us, we were expecting 73 and two couples were no shows so we had more like 65 actually attend.

To the bolded, I couldn't agree more! I atteneded a wedding like this and we were absolutely crammed into the place...it was pretty horrible.  I think a lot of venues advertise a higher capacity then they can comfortably fill and really who liks climbing over people to get from the bar to the bathroom to your table etc...

Also I agree to ALWAYS plan for 100% attendance!

monkeysip

That's true, you do need to figure out REAL capacity, vs. advertised capacity.  But we had already seen our tables and the layout, so we knew it'd be fine.  We also had an outside deck with tables and chairs if people just wanted some fresh air or more space.

Jen4948

Regardless of how many people are invited, you need to plan for 100% attendance.  Yes, it's probably a safe bet that there will be declines and last-minute no-shows, but even so, you have to plan that everyone will come, including any who don't respond at all.

Inkdancer

monkeysip said:

That's true, you do need to figure out REAL capacity, vs. advertised capacity.  But we had already seen our tables and the layout, so we knew it'd be fine.  We also had an outside deck with tables and chairs if people just wanted some fresh air or more space.

Very much this. FI and I were lucky to visit our venue while it was set up for a wedding much larger than ours, so we could see that there would be plenty of space for everyone to sit and still have a dance floor.

lovesclimbing

marriedlady1212 said:

When we found our reception venue, they told us they had 20 tables that seat 8-10 people. We have invited 194 people. Now we are told they have 20 tables that seat 8 and have 160 chairs. So! We have a back up plan to rent more tables and chairs if needed, but we are praying only 160 people RSVP yes.

You should really have a talk with your venue. They told you they had enough tables for that many people and now, all of a sudden, they don't. You should not have to worry about renting stuff on your own. If they don't come up with the required number, I would rent some and then ask them for a partial refund and/or write bad reviews.

ETA: ask for a refund that a least covers your rental cost.

SomethingBeautiful08

Invited about 170, about 90 RSVPed Yes, about 80 showed, though I never got a good count since we didn't do a sit down meal.  It was a DW for all of my family and most couldn't make it. 

SomethingBeautiful08

Invited about 170, about 90 RSVPed Yes, about 80 showed, though I never got a good count since we didn't do a sit down meal.  It was a DW for all of my family and most couldn't make it. 

indianaalum

Like others have said, expect 100 percent attendance, HOWEVER, you should also make sure you can live with the potential "low" number you receive based on minimum requirements of the venue.

If you are required to have a min of 100, and you only invite 100 people. You could get screwed as "most" people don't have 100 percent attendance rate. Keep that in mind, as well.

SP29

lovesclimbing said:

When we found our reception venue, they told us they had 20 tables that seat 8-10 people. We have invited 194 people. Now we are told they have 20 tables that seat 8 and have 160 chairs. So! We have a back up plan to rent more tables and chairs if needed, but we are praying only 160 people RSVP yes.

You should really have a talk with your venue. They told you they had enough tables for that many people and now, all of a sudden, they don't. You should not have to worry about renting stuff on your own. If they don't come up with the required number, I would rent some and then ask them for a partial refund and/or write bad reviews. ETA: ask for a refund that a least covers your rental cost.

I agree with this. What does your contract say about min/max numbers (if any- I don't believe my contract states a max, just the min)? I'd be pretty pissed if the venue told me one number, then changed it drastically. I agree it's up to the venue to figure it out or compensate you.

We invited 111 guests, including vendors. Our RSVP isn't here yet (though only 10 days left- eek!!), but so far only 57 guests (including vendors) have responded yes. With the few responses we have left to receive we're expecting 60-70 to come. However, a large portion of our guest list is friends and family from OOT, and they are the main group of declines. 

thelastdreamer

We're inviting aiming to invite 100. Our reception venue can hold that, but we're hoping we get 80 so we have room for a dance floor. Over half of our guest list is across the country, so I'm very confident we will. I've already had people who will be invited politely tell me they won't be able to make it. Even if some of them change their minds, I think we'll be ok. If not, the dance floor will be quite little, but we could still make do.

WedReMix13

aefitz29 said:

WedReMix13 said:

I sent out 165 invites and only 15 showed up. 

@WedReMix13 - Not to pry and be a Nosey Nancy but was this because the invites were not sent far enough in advance or because of a different reason?

I sent the invites 4 weeks in advance. I dont know why some people didnt attend. They didnt respond to the RSVP so I cant say. Those that did decline were due to different reasons. 35 people said yes, so what changed their minds i dont know. It was ok though. I'm sad some could not come but I loved how small it was. 

ETA: I should Edit my post- it was 165 people, not invites. We sent out 35. My answer for why though is still the same  

kgd7357

cowgirl8238 said:

acove2006 said:

Always plan for 100% and make sure you leave wiggle room for new relationships in case they

Always plan for 100% and make sure you leave wiggle room for new relationships in case they happen. I also personally wouldn't invite more than 175 people if my venue could only hold 200 max. Cutting it too close if you have 100% attendance. I've read horror stories about that once or twice on here.

We invited around 83 (3-4 of those were courtesy invites that we knew 110% wouldn't come). Including our family of 4 we were expecting 75 until one couple had to cancel, thankfully before final counts were due. So then, again including us, we were expecting 73 and two couples were no shows so we had more like 65 actually attend.

To the bolded, I couldn't agree more! I atteneded a wedding like this and we were absolutely crammed into the place...it was pretty horrible.  I think a lot of venues advertise a higher capacity then they can comfortably fill and really who liks climbing over people to get from the bar to the bathroom to your table etc...

Also I agree to ALWAYS plan for 100% attendance!

I have exactly this! My venue says it can hold 270, which is such a lie. I think 200 only with a dance floor comfortably. I also have friends that keep starting new relationships. So our list is ending up to be 180 thinking we may end up with close to 200 with new SOs by the time the invites go out in April! I seriously think there is a possibility that we only get two or three nos, and I want room to dance!