Chit Chat

"That's a dress for a size zero"

JCbride2015JCbride2015 member
5000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary First Answer
edited January 2014 in Chit Chat
Sorry this is so long-- I'm just super livid.  Cliff Notes: bridal consultant couldn't shut up, diarrhea of the mouth, her two most offensive comments below are bolded.

WTF.  I just had the WORST dress shopping experience.  I know a couple of the consultant's comments were obviously off color, but I'm also trying to get a read on whether the ENTIRE appointment was just weird (my first one).  This is what happened.

This was a Nordstrom Bridal Suite in NJ.

I went with my sister/MOH "K" and friend S.  The consultant had a short form for me to fill out about my style preferences and wedding details.  Then she proceeded to go on a really long-winded explanation about how there are 18 Nordstrom Bridal Suites in the country, Seattle has the biggest selection, NJ doesn't have every dress you see online... yadda yadda.  Then she walks us through the whole floor, stopping at EACH RACK and giving us a full-on description of the designer.  This was like the whole first half hour of the appt.  And she was going full-steam never even stopping to ask what I liked.  I really don't think she asked for my opinion even once during the whole appointment, not even when I was actually wearing dresses.  It was diarrhea of the mouth the entire time.

Another customer came in demanding a BM dress return, so the Con told us to choose 6 dresses on our own and bring them back.  Sure, so we did.  

The talking went on and on, I would try on a dress, she wouldn't even ask me or K and S what we thought about it, and then she would just babble on about some random details of the dress.  She was also really fixated on alterations costs, like "cups would be $16" or "A hem is usually $250," or "When you get a lot of layers in a dress, that can put the alterations up toward $700."  She COULD NOT SHUT UP.

After Dress #2, the first really weird comment happened.  Con: "So you have a 2015 wedding." Me: "I know it's a little early, but--" Con cut me right off: "Oh, it's not that early at all, it takes so long to order a dress.." She talked for at least ten minutes about all the details of ordering wedding dresses, how the store aggregated the orders every two weeks, Chinese New Year affects production in Feb, on and on and on.  THEN she goes, "But you also don't want to be that bride who goes all around wanting to get the experience you see on TV, then those brides just ghost and don't return our calls.  Then another bride with a 2014 wedding couldn't have that appt because you had it, and she's going to be asking, why was a 2015 bride in here?  But oh, I don't mean you of course."  K, S and I are all staring at her with our eyes bugging out of her heads but she did not get the hint.  So somehow we have to hurry up because it takes so long... but I am also taking away an appt from an earlier bride and apparently looking for the TV experience? What the what?

The worst comment came towards the end of the appointment.  So my sis had pulled sort of a princess-y dress with a poofy skirt that I didn't love but she wanted to see.  Con was gone again (a walk-in had come in and was trying on BM dresses) so S zipped me into the dress.  I had to stand there and hold it up because it was practically falling off.  Con walks in and without even asking what anyone thinks, says the following: "Oh, I told you that was really a dress for a petite bride.  Everybody loves it on the hanger but the only brides I've seen really pull it off are those really tiny brides, it's just a dress for a size zero.  I don't mean to be rude, I just mean it's one of those dresses that looks best on, you know, like a size zero tiny bride."  All three of us were shocked silent and just looking daggers at her, but she kept on talking, completely oblivious.

WTF bitch.  First off, I am damn cute.  I can pull off whatever the fuck dress I want.  The sample was like two sizes too big on me, so I don't even know WTF she was talking about.  After the first two dresses which were slightly too small, all five of the other samples were too big and she had to do the fold-and-clip deal to keep them up.  But really-- what is going through your damn head that you would make a comment like that?  How do you really think that's going to work out for your sale at the end of the day?

Oh and I forgot.  Halfway through the appt she brought in BM dresses to show S and K.  Seriously!  Bless my sister, she said: "This is really JC's day, I don't want the focus on me.  We'll worry about BM dresses later."

Then she awkwardly went for the hug at the end of the appt.

The sad part is, I found one dress (no, Con didn't find it, I pulled it off the rack because she barely helped with anything) that I really like.  I won't say I love it yet, but I'd want to come see more from that designer.  But now there is no way I want to go back there, and it's exclusive to Nordstrom, so I can't find the line anywhere else.

Also just to head off potential questions: we were not "looking for a TV experience."  Kleinfeld's is actually closer to my house but I chose Nordstrom for the gowns I'd seen online, the price range, and it seemed less intimidating.  I am financially prepared to put a deposit on a dress on the spot if I fall in love.  We did not expect/ ask for royal treatment, we are all in our mid 20s and not giggly or immature at all.

ETF typo.
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"I'm not a rude bitch.  I'm ten rude bitches in a large coat."

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Re: "That's a dress for a size zero"

  • I'm so sorry that it went so poorly for you. It may be worthwhile to talk with the manager about your poor experience. Hopefully it improves for your next appointment.
  • Wow, she must have had no training whatsoever for that job.  I mean, if she was trained, I imagine lesson one would be "Do not insult the customer."  Just a general rule of thumb, if your job is to deal with customers directly, and you have to say "I don't mean to be rude," you're about to say something too rude for your job.  I don't get why that consultant doesn't seem to understand something that simple.  
    I can definitely see why you'd be mad about the size zero comment, that's extremely bitchy.  Granted, I don't think she MEANT to come across as bitchy, I just think she has zero tact and clearly doesn't think about what she says before she says it.  I do also think it's stupid she even felt the need to mention the size zero thing.  People need to quit being so obsessed with sizes.  
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  • Wow, she must have had no training whatsoever for that job.  I mean, if she was trained, I imagine lesson one would be "Do not insult the customer."  Just a general rule of thumb, if your job is to deal with customers directly, and you have to say "I don't mean to be rude," you're about to say something too rude for your job.  I don't get why that consultant doesn't seem to understand something that simple.  
    I can definitely see why you'd be mad about the size zero comment, that's extremely bitchy.  Granted, I don't think she MEANT to come across as bitchy, I just think she has zero tact and clearly doesn't think about what she says before she says it.  I do also think it's stupid she even felt the need to mention the size zero thing.  People need to quit being so obsessed with sizes.  
    First bolded: I know right?  This is like how saying, "I'm not racist, but..." is always followed by a racist statement.  If you have to say the disclaimer, you probably shouldn't make the statement.

    Second bolded: I think this was the case.  And her constant babbling and stream of talking through the whole appointment-- she was just completely socially tone-deaf.
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    "I'm not a rude bitch.  I'm ten rude bitches in a large coat."

  • Wow, she must have had no training whatsoever for that job.  I mean, if she was trained, I imagine lesson one would be "Do not insult the customer."  Just a general rule of thumb, if your job is to deal with customers directly, and you have to say "I don't mean to be rude," you're about to say something too rude for your job.  I don't get why that consultant doesn't seem to understand something that simple.  
    I can definitely see why you'd be mad about the size zero comment, that's extremely bitchy.  Granted, I don't think she MEANT to come across as bitchy, I just think she has zero tact and clearly doesn't think about what she says before she says it.  I do also think it's stupid she even felt the need to mention the size zero thing.  People need to quit being so obsessed with sizes.  
    First bolded: I know right?  This is like how saying, "I'm not racist, but..." is always followed by a racist statement.  If you have to say the disclaimer, you probably shouldn't make the statement.

    Second bolded: I think this was the case.  And her constant babbling and stream of talking through the whole appointment-- she was just completely socially tone-deaf.

    That's awful, @jcbride2014! I'd expect so much more from Nordstroms. There are lots of other bridal shops in the area with much better customer service, and possibly a better handle of their pragmatic language.
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  • Yeah, that whole experience sounds very awkward and unpleasant. Sorry you had to deal with that. 
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • That sucks. :(

    That is seriously bad consultant
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  • Uhm....wow. that's terrible. I would definitely call the manager and complain.

    I didn't go dress shopping for myswlf, but I did go with a friend, and her sales consultant was good about steering her toward dresses that were more flattering for her (short, big-boob, very overweight) body type WITH OUT saying, 'Oh, that only looks good on teeny-tiny brides.'

    That's just ridiculous.
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    I'm gonna go with 'not my circus, not my monkeys.'
  • I can understand her going through and showing you each rack of designers, etc (though it sounds like a waste of time).  I think you should call and speak with a manager.  Tell her how many inappropriate comments were made by the consultant.  Tell her there was a dress that you really liked and may consider purchasing, but after your experience, you don't want to go back to the bridal suite.  If nothing happens, call the corporate office.  

    I recall my photographer was getting married a little after I did.  She had great things to say about the Nordstrom Bridal, but she probably went to one in King of Prussia just outside Philly.  If you really like the one dress, are you willing to travel a little farther to a different Nordstrom bridal.
  • I would complain! You (generic) can't treat people like that!
  • @JCBride said......................WTF bitch.  First off, I am damn cute.  I can pull off whatever the fuck dress I want.  The sample was like two sizes too big on me, so I don't even know WTF she was talking about.  After the first two dresses which were slightly too small, all five of the other samples were too big and she had to do the fold-and-clip deal to keep them up.  But really-- what is going through your damn head that you would make a comment like that?  How do you really think that's going to work out for your sale at the end of the day?


    To the bolded......I love that!  Your confidence is what allowed you to leave that appointment with your sanity intact!

    Without making excuses, I wonder if this associate was relatively new.  It sounds as if she was trying to spew anything and everything from the "owners manual", except in hyperdrive.  Nervous energy will do that.  It also sounds as if the department was short staffed.  The one area in which I do think she was being helpful, albeit perhaps a tad crazy train, was mentioning alteration prices.  Those prices can vary like crazy from dress to dress, and store to store.  Those costs add up quickly to the overall budget of a dress.

    I shop Nordstrom frequently.  They absolutely respond to feedback, both positive and negative.  A civil, but firm email will probably help your cause tremendously.  I would explain that you do have an interest in a specific dress, but that you would prefer a more "seasoned" associate to help you.
  • The consultant also needs to know why she's potentially lost a sale. If enough customers provide feedback on her, she will be re-trained and given the opportunity to change her style before she loses her job over it. She doesn't know she needs to change unless she's told that.
  • Definitely complain to the manager, as PPs said. That woman needs to be working as a stock girl only until she learns to hone her customer service skills. I don't think any of it was intentional on her part -- it was, as you said, verbal diarrhea. She thought she was being helpful, but she had zero tact and it wasn't the kind of help you wanted or needed.

    That is not how an appointment should go. Granted, not every consultant is going to be fabulous and know the perfect dress for you right off the bat; however, the consultant should be actively trying to find that dress for you, and she really wasn't. She was a little too focused on proving what she knows instead of putting that knowledge to good use. They also should have had another consultant there to handle returns and walk-ins, and she should not have brought up BM dresses unless you asked about them, or left you unattended.

    I would see if another area salon carries the designer you're interested in. I hope the next appointment is more enjoyable!


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  • I think you need to complain to the manager. That consultant was completely out of line, even if she didn't mean to be.
  • That's awful! I'm sorry your dress experience was like that. =(
    Definitely talk to the manager, even email customer service and let them know what happened.
    I always email good feedback but bad as well, because they really need to know!

    Can you order the dress you liked off of the website?
  • Thanks for the commiseration everybody!  I have the card for her manager so maybe I will send an email.  I agree she wasn't intentionally being mean, she was just really socially unskilled.  

    She said she'd been at Nordstrom for a year and the bridal suite for 4 months.  TMI for her to tell me that at the time, but at least I know she's fairly new (although not brand-new).  And yes, she shouldn't have been the only one working the entire department-- I think that was part of the problem, at least why she left us a couple times.

    I still can't believe she said some of those things.  She must just have zero social skills.
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    "I'm not a rude bitch.  I'm ten rude bitches in a large coat."

  • CaliMel11 said:
    That's awful! I'm sorry your dress experience was like that. =(
    Definitely talk to the manager, even email customer service and let them know what happened.
    I always email good feedback but bad as well, because they really need to know!

    Can you order the dress you liked off of the website?
    I already checked and I can't, but I might be able to drive to the Nordstrom Bridal in PA if I end up really wanting to come back for it.  But I think the easier move would be to contact the manager and say I like the dress but I'd rather not work with this particular consultant.  Either way, I don't think the dress was totally perfect, but if I'd liked the consultant I definitely would have come back to see more of that line.
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    "I'm not a rude bitch.  I'm ten rude bitches in a large coat."

  • CaliMel11 said:
    That's awful! I'm sorry your dress experience was like that. =(
    Definitely talk to the manager, even email customer service and let them know what happened.
    I always email good feedback but bad as well, because they really need to know!

    Can you order the dress you liked off of the website?
    I already checked and I can't, but I might be able to drive to the Nordstrom Bridal in PA if I end up really wanting to come back for it.  But I think the easier move would be to contact the manager and say I like the dress but I'd rather not work with this particular consultant.  Either way, I don't think the dress was totally perfect, but if I'd liked the consultant I definitely would have come back to see more of that line.
    JC you can always come visit the seattle store and I will take you!!!! ;) 
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  • Ugh.  I would leave and then call the owner/manager/whoever of the shop and make a complaint about her.  I would say that you had a bad experience, she was rude, and you probably would have purchased a dress if your consultant hadn't been such a terrible consultant. 
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  • Uuugh you have more patience and tact than I- I literally would have said something to her on the spot and asked for a new consultant. I'm not a bridezilla or a bitch but she was inappropriate. 

    So I showed up for my appointment and the girl is like "Jenna?! OMG, I saw your name in the book and I had to make sure I was the one to get you!!" It was my brother's ex-wife's best friend. So I'm like uuum awkward, I haven't spoken to the ex-wife since the divorce 2 years ago and I hate her, why would I want to work with her best friend?! So I had a VERY specific style I wanted. I printed the only 6 from their website in that style and she takes the list and says "oh we don't have any of these". I was like wtf why are they on your website? So she's pulling strapless and I said my #1 priority was straps but she just kept saying "give it a try, you never know". I was so annoyed, thank god my appointment at the 2nd store had my dream dress :) 

                                                                     

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  • CaliMel11 said:
    That's awful! I'm sorry your dress experience was like that. =(
    Definitely talk to the manager, even email customer service and let them know what happened.
    I always email good feedback but bad as well, because they really need to know!

    Can you order the dress you liked off of the website?
    I already checked and I can't, but I might be able to drive to the Nordstrom Bridal in PA if I end up really wanting to come back for it.  But I think the easier move would be to contact the manager and say I like the dress but I'd rather not work with this particular consultant.  Either way, I don't think the dress was totally perfect, but if I'd liked the consultant I definitely would have come back to see more of that line.
    aww I see. That makes sense. It's also strange to me that she did not recommend any dresses for you! That's part of their job, since there are sooo many to choose from. The one I ended up getting at David's Bridal was one that the consultant pulled for me.
    It sounds like she needs a lot more training or to just work in a different section entirely.
  • Whoa, update:  AND she outright lied to me about the dress I liked!  Con told me the line "Bliss by Monique Lhullier" is exclusive to Nordstrom, but I JUST found it online at Kleinfeld.  And my exact dress is pictured on the Kleinfeld website.  Holy shitballs she was awful.
    That's really bad. I have to wonder how many others she's lied to? That's like she's tricking people on purpose just so they order it from them. definitely let them know she is doing that, Nordstroms does not want people who do that selling anything for them.
    At least you found it online though!
  • Woah that is terrible. Someone needs to know so theu dont lose sales because of her. I'm glad you found it online!
  • Ew, sorry about your crappy experience. 

    First, you definitely need to notify management, politely but firmly. Secondly, don't let this stop you from dress shopping. Wait a little bit, then pick a different venue to try on. 
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  • Whoa, that's terrible!  And the one thing I've always said ever since Nordstrom opened at the Plaza was that their customer service is top notch.  So sorry you had that experience.  Definitely call management.  Nordstrom prides itself on customer service and I've never come across someone that terrible at the one in Paramus, ever.  She's an aberration & they need to know it.
    You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough. ~Mae West
  • Whoa, update:  AND she outright lied to me about the dress I liked!  Con told me the line "Bliss by Monique Lhullier" is exclusive to Nordstrom, but I JUST found it online at Kleinfeld.  And my exact dress is pictured on the Kleinfeld website.  Holy shitballs she was awful.
    She seriously said that?  Bliss isn't exclusive to anyone, you can find that line in any bridal salon that chooses to stock it.  In fact, here's a link to the site, if you enter in your state and on the next page uncheck everything other than "Bliss" it'll give you a list of stores in your area that carry the line.  I can't believe she lied to you like that, she just doesn't sound very bright at all.
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  • Yeah, that's not normal. Sorry you had a crummy experience!
    That consultant needs to learn what a filter is!
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  • oooh, is it the one with chantilly lace, because that dress is GAWGEOUS.

    But yes, I'd call and lodge a complaint with the manager.

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  • Wow, sounds like the consultant I had at David's Bridal. You poor girl! I would have thought Nordstrom's would have more professional and experienced consultants.

    Hope your future appointments are better!
  • Sorry you had to deal with that. Dress appts. can very from great to horrible, even in the same shop. I went to about 6 dress shops and had mostly good experiences. My only bad one was too busy to really even help me at all, even though I had appt. I would set another appointment to try on what you want but tell them you want to work with a different consultant.

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