Desperately need shower and/or registry advice with a DW. Is it too late with the wedding on 4/24?

Kella0223

My FI and I are only having our immediate family at our destination wedding in Grand Cayman on 4/24/14 because neither of us like being the center of attention. I am not having a bridal party, but my sister asked if I wanted a shower a while ago, but I said no, I think it would not be correct etiquette (my sis said she had no idea if it is either!). However, now my few GFs have said they would definitely attend if that is how they could celebrate with me. One even has gone looking for a registry. Is it to late for something at this point though? Could I or would I have to invite others (extended family) too? Would it be ok to still register for gifts even without a shower or after-party? Any advice on having showers and/or a registry with a DW is greatly appreciated!! Thanks!

msuprincess04

A shower should only include invited guests. Otherwise, you should really decline a party. If someone wants to throw a regular party or bbq (not wedding related), then have fun, but don't register as that would be inappropriate. 

Otherwise, a small registry isn't out of line. I have a small one for my destination wedding. I am having a shower, but I also have 100+ people invited to the wedding. 

saric83

Ditto PP.  There is nothing wrong with a shower and/or registry when you're having a DW but only if everyone invited is also invited to the wedding.  

ShaunRonda101214

It is certainly not too late! Most showers are not held until about a month before the wedding anyway. It is also only considerate to invite those who are also invited to the wedding, but is a great way to include those who for whatever reason cannot make the wedding, but who also want to celebrate with you.

Also keep in mind that you can have different kinds of showers that are suited to you. Of course there is the standard shower but you can have themed showers. If it is with just close girlfriends you can have a lingerie shower (where you are gifted with lingerie and other intimate fun gifts) My best friend had a kitchen party where a chef gave a mini cooking lesson to the guests and our gifts were not only kitchen items, but we all gave copies of favorite family recipes to her and built her personalized cookbook from all of us. I have also attended showers with Garden themes, Bridal Tea parties, ect. 

Think over ideas based on what you and your fiance love to do together and base a shower around that and be creative! Good luck!    

mmm4763

I had a registry for my DW which was immediate family only. Very close friends and others who I am close to/knew the situation kept asking where we were registered (I had not been planning to really register). 

Someone on another board put it well: A registry is not a demand for gifts; it's simply a guide for those who may wish to purchase something.

In the end, very glad I ended up registering as nearly everything has been purchased and it saved me from getting a lot of random silver platters, etc.