Meh, I think there are well meaning points and then some of it is just wedding industry hooey.
2. If you want us to wear heels, take care of our feet. We’ll put up
with it for you, but we’ll be a little sad if we end the night with
blisters or twisted ankles! Please don’t make us wobble-walk on grass –
think about investing in heel-stoppers! This isn't the bride's responsibility- grown women should know how to wear heels w/o killing themselves. The stoppers are cool but walking on grass is pretty simply, you keep your weight on the balls of your feet and don't step down on your heels, but I see no problem with the BM's buying the stoppers for themselves. If the Bride bought them, well bonus. And we’re definitely going to want to dance the night away.
More comfy shoes are preferred, so we’re not trying to brave the dance
floor in bare feet! Again, not the bride's responsibility- learn 2 bring flats. Or learn 2 buy and wear comfortable shoes.
6. If I don’t know anyone, introduce me to all the bridesmaids
beforehand so we have time to be friends. Fun outings, lunch, or nights
out are a great way to get us together before the big day. This is probably unnecessary; Your BM's don't need to be friends in order to be pleasant with each other and walk down an aisle. Nice idea in theory, but a lot of people hate forced socialization.
9. I’m happy to help you out with most things – DIY projects, picking up
dresses, or mailing invites are all expected. But don’t ask me last
minute for my help, or resent me if I can’t make it. I have other things
to do too! *Buzzer sound* Wrong!!! None of that crap is expected of your BM's- this is flat out wedding industry bullshit and one of the reasons so many brides come on these boards stomping their feet. DIY projects, picking up dresses, mailing invites- that's all shit you and your FI need to be doing. You can nicely ask ppl to help you, but they are free to decline and you should never expect help or guilt them into it.
"Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."
I disagree with almost everything on that list. In addition to @PrettyGirlLost's list above:
3. Loosen us up the morning of the big day. We want to celebrate with you, and be nice and relaxed for the ceremony! We won’t say no to some drinks, snacks, and extra pampering. Extra pampering = extra cost, which is not on the bride. If the BM's sole duty is to show up on-time, sober, and in the right dress, it's certainly not on the bride to provide drinks, snacks, and extra pampering. It's nice if you can, but you don't have to.
4. Shower us with presents! While we love doing this for you, it’s nice to get some gifts for helping you out. We’ll want to party and celebrate, so it’d be nice to have kits for hangovers after the bachelorette and wedding day. Excuse me, what? Shower you with presents? Give you gifts for helping out? No. You don't get to ASK SOMEONE to give you gifts. And you're a grown-ass adult; I'm not giving you a hangover kit. Learn to control yourself.
Oh, and personal thank you gifts are always appreciated – it’ll give us a special way to remember being a part of your wedding! JUST NO!
7. Warn me of creepy groomsmen, or set me up with the hottie if I’m single! I’d love to have the best time possible at your big day. I will agree to warning about creepy GM (although if there are creepy GM, I'm thinking the bride and groom should have a talk about him. And the hottie if she's single? No. JUST NO!
The only thing I completely agree with is the hair style -- if you want something specific, you should pay for it.
The whole "don't-make-me-compete-for-your-attention" thing I don't get at all. What, the bride is supposed to make sure she talks to all the BMs for *exactly* the same length of time? No.
And the bachelorette party -- the bride should have no say unless asked. IF asked, she can GENTLY suggest something, and the BMs can either agree or disagree or counteroffer.
I'm gonna go with 'not my circus, not my monkeys.'
Agree with all PP's. This post makes me stabby. I do think the bride should be considerate to her ladies in general areas like budget, comfort, etc, but the rest of that is not necessary. If the BP expects the bride to do all of that, then I can foresee future MOH/Bridesmaid-zillas in the making. Even if nothing is super extreme, it should not be expected. Just like the bride should not expect parties, super involvement, and all that jazz.
Re: 10 ways to be the coolest bride ever...
2. If you want us to wear heels, take care of our feet. We’ll put up with it for you, but we’ll be a little sad if we end the night with blisters or twisted ankles! Please don’t make us wobble-walk on grass – think about investing in heel-stoppers! This isn't the bride's responsibility- grown women should know how to wear heels w/o killing themselves. The stoppers are cool but walking on grass is pretty simply, you keep your weight on the balls of your feet and don't step down on your heels, but I see no problem with the BM's buying the stoppers for themselves. If the Bride bought them, well bonus. And we’re definitely going to want to dance the night away. More comfy shoes are preferred, so we’re not trying to brave the dance floor in bare feet! Again, not the bride's responsibility- learn 2 bring flats. Or learn 2 buy and wear comfortable shoes.
6. If I don’t know anyone, introduce me to all the bridesmaids beforehand so we have time to be friends. Fun outings, lunch, or nights out are a great way to get us together before the big day. This is probably unnecessary; Your BM's don't need to be friends in order to be pleasant with each other and walk down an aisle. Nice idea in theory, but a lot of people hate forced socialization.
9. I’m happy to help you out with most things – DIY projects, picking up dresses, or mailing invites are all expected. But don’t ask me last minute for my help, or resent me if I can’t make it. I have other things to do too! *Buzzer sound* Wrong!!! None of that crap is expected of your BM's- this is flat out wedding industry bullshit and one of the reasons so many brides come on these boards stomping their feet. DIY projects, picking up dresses, mailing invites- that's all shit you and your FI need to be doing. You can nicely ask ppl to help you, but they are free to decline and you should never expect help or guilt them into it.
"Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."