Help (TMI)

Teddy917

So I've developed this issue. I need to go to the bathroom constantly. It started out gradually but now I have to go like every half hour. I have to go to work at 1:30 and I don't know what to do about it while I'm there (I work in fast food FYI). I'm going to see a doctor about it as soon as I can get an appointment.

I've tried drinking more than normal for a few days to see if that would work. I've tried drinking less than normal. I've tried limiting myself to mostly water.

The worst part is that my manager (a new guy) made a rule (which I've been told he can't legally make, but if you can shed some light on that please do) that we can't go to the bathroom except during our break. For one thing, I'm never given my break during the time I need it (if I get one at all). Plus now I've got this issue. And I can't just skip work. He's already cut my hours drastically and my husband insisted I go since we need the money (I think he just doesn't understand how bad it's gotten).

Are there any solutions that you guys can think of that'll work temporarily?

JCbride2015

Wow.  Well, the most obvious solution is to get a Depend pad jic.  It doesn't have to be a whole diaper, they make pads and pantyliners that are more the size you would wear during your period, just extra absorbent.  I know that sounds awful and I wish your boss wasn't such a jerk, but you will probably feel better knowing that if you have leakage or a small accident, you won't be embarrassed.

And I also think it's wrong (maybe illegal) for your boss to make the bathroom rule.  Can you possibly tell him, "I have an issue that I don't want to go into, but if I need to use the restroom, I'm going to do it."  Would he notice if you went to the bathroom without telling him?  What would happen if you just went?

And yes, get thee to your doctor.  It might be as simple as a UTI but it should be checked out.

pumpkinsandturkeys

I'm in a different country, so I can't speak to the laws where you are, but it's definitely illegal in Canada for an employer or manager to stipulate such a rule. That's a denial of your basic rights, and here, that would be akin to telling a diabetic that they couldn't take a break to administer insulin.

As JC said, it's probably a UTI or something similar, but definitely get it checked in case it's a kidney issue.

I would speak with your manager and let him know that due to a medical issue that you are not going to disclose, you need to use the washroom on an as-needed basis. If he takes issue with it, tell him you're going to report him to the labour board for your area. I would also address the issue with his management (there's always someone above them).

Finally, please look for a new job! I know it's tough, but I'm sure you can find something better than this, even if it's another fast food job.

KatWAG

My first two thoughts are UTI or pregnancy. For me, peeing all the time was the first noticeable sign of pregnancy. My doctor told me when I pee I should lean forward. Then you push on your bladder and get every last drop out (Over share, but true) It helped.

melbelleup

I'm another vote for UTI or pregnancy. I also think you need to talk to your manager and tell him you're having health issues which require you to use the bathroom more. If he doesn't like it, tell him you will speak to someone higher up and get him a doctor's note.

Teddy917

I've always been nervous about doctors (horrible experiences) so I'm curious what kind of exam they'd do for this?

KatWAG

Teddy917 said:

I've always been nervous about doctors (horrible experiences) so I'm curious what kind of exam they'd do for this?

You pee in a cup.

JCbride2015

If it were me, I would go to my gyno about this, not my regular practitioner.  Anytime I've had a UTI they haven't actually done an exam at all, just listened to my symptoms and prescribed antibiotics.  I'm not sure what they would do as far as a physical exam, but it seems like it might involve pressing on your abdomen and maybe doing a pelvic exam.  I would be willing to bet your doctor will need to touch you in private areas to figure out what this is.  But I encourage you to still go to the doc, it sounds like something you should have checked out.

JennyColada

I usually go to Urgent Care for a UTI (my gyno makes me wait a couple days). They have you pee in a cup and if it comes back positive you're out the door with antibiotics and feeling better in a couple hours.

If it's not a UTI then I'd follow with a gyno visit or GP visit.

Until then, cranberry juice (NOT cocktail, the pure bitter juice!) and maxi pads.

sarahufl

I always have to pee SO MUCH when I have a UTI, but they usually have very other strong symptoms (burning, itching, super uncomfortable).

I think the real problem here is that your boss sounds like a jerk. I don't think that sounds legal.

JennyColada

JCBride2014 said:

If it were me, I would go to my gyno about this, not my regular practitioner.  Anytime I've had a UTI they haven't actually done an exam at all, just listened to my symptoms and prescribed antibiotics.  I'm not sure what they would do as far as a physical exam, but it seems like it might involve pressing on your abdomen and maybe doing a pelvic exam.  I would be willing to bet your doctor will need to touch you in private areas to figure out what this is.  But I encourage you to still go to the doc, it sounds like something you should have checked out.

That seems very odd. UTI symptoms can be many things, and the antibiotics are pretty strong, so not something you should take if it's not really a UTI (plus if it's not a UTI then the antibiotics can mask the symptoms but not fix the underlying issue).

If you have a history of UTUs then that's one thing, but if you don't and your doc prescribes you antibiotics without any actual tests then it's time to find a new Doc!

Teddy917

KatWAG said:

Teddy917 said:

I've always been nervous about doctors (horrible experiences) so I'm curious what kind of exam they'd do for this?

You pee in a cup.

That's it?!?!? Thanks. I'm much more relaxed now. I've had experiences when I was younger of doctors being very unprofessional. Example: I went in when I was really young for some medication for strep throat. This guy starts fondling my breasts. I asked him to stop and he didn't and my mom wouldn't do anything about it. So I'm relieved to know beforehand what's going to happen.

tmclawchick

KatWAG said:

My first two thoughts are UTI or pregnancy. For me, peeing all the time was the first noticeable sign of pregnancy. My doctor told me when I pee I should lean forward. Then you push on your bladder and get every last drop out (Over share, but true) It helped.

This is my gut feeling as well. Frequent urination was one of the first symptoms I experienced when I was pregnant, but also occurs with UTIs. Definitely make an appointment soon to have it checked out.

Re: your boss's rule about no bathroom breaks outside of your break time, you may want to remind him/her that OSHA regulations forbid employers from unreasonably restricting bathroom access. Good luck!

Teddy917

Thanks. I thought it was illegal and several other people (but they don't always know what they're talking about) told me it was, so I'm glad to know.

pumpkinsandturkeys

Teddy917 said:

Teddy917 said:

I've always been nervous about doctors (horrible experiences) so I'm curious what kind of exam they'd do for this?

You pee in a cup.

That's it?!?!? Thanks. I'm much more relaxed now. I've had experiences when I was younger of doctors being very unprofessional. Example: I went in when I was really young for some medication for strep throat. This guy starts fondling my breasts. I asked him to stop and he didn't and my mom wouldn't do anything about it. So I'm relieved to know beforehand what's going to happen.

That's awful! I understand being trepidatious when going to the doctor now, but please know that the vast majority are not assholes like that and will not violate you. I'm so sorry that happened to you.

Teddy917

JCBride2014 said:

Wow.  Well, the most obvious solution is to get a Depend pad jic.  It doesn't have to be a whole diaper, they make pads and pantyliners that are more the size you would wear during your period, just extra absorbent.  I know that sounds awful and I wish your boss wasn't such a jerk, but you will probably feel better knowing that if you have leakage or a small accident, you won't be embarrassed.

And I also think it's wrong (maybe illegal) for your boss to make the bathroom rule.  Can you possibly tell him, "I have an issue that I don't want to go into, but if I need to use the restroom, I'm going to do it."  Would he notice if you went to the bathroom without telling him?  What would happen if you just went?

And yes, get thee to your doctor.  It might be as simple as a UTI but it should be checked out.

My manager would write me up. The funny thing is that company policy is that if I don't sign the write up, it doesn't count. He would notice unfortunately if I just slipped out to use the restroom. Even if he didn't see me, there's a shift leader that hates me and tries to find something that I do wrong.

Maggie0829

Wow.  Well, the most obvious solution is to get a Depend pad jic.  It doesn't have to be a whole diaper, they make pads and pantyliners that are more the size you would wear during your period, just extra absorbent.  I know that sounds awful and I wish your boss wasn't such a jerk, but you will probably feel better knowing that if you have leakage or a small accident, you won't be embarrassed.

And I also think it's wrong (maybe illegal) for your boss to make the bathroom rule.  Can you possibly tell him, "I have an issue that I don't want to go into, but if I need to use the restroom, I'm going to do it."  Would he notice if you went to the bathroom without telling him?  What would happen if you just went?

And yes, get thee to your doctor.  It might be as simple as a UTI but it should be checked out.

My manager would write me up. The funny thing is that company policy is that if I don't sign the write up, it doesn't count. He would notice unfortunately if I just slipped out to use the restroom. Even if he didn't see me, there's a shift leader that hates me and tries to find something that I do wrong.

I would just tell your manager that he either lets you use the bathroom when you need to or risk major health issues since you will just have to pee yourself. Deciding when people are and aren't allowed to use the bathroom is by far the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard of. Do you only have one manager? Heck I would even take this complaint up with your franchisee or even corporate.

Teddy917

pumpkinsandturkeys said:

Teddy917 said:

Teddy917 said:

I've always been nervous about doctors (horrible experiences) so I'm curious what kind of exam they'd do for this?

You pee in a cup.

That's it?!?!? Thanks. I'm much more relaxed now. I've had experiences when I was younger of doctors being very unprofessional. Example: I went in when I was really young for some medication for strep throat. This guy starts fondling my breasts. I asked him to stop and he didn't and my mom wouldn't do anything about it. So I'm relieved to know beforehand what's going to happen.


That's awful! I understand being trepidatious when going to the doctor now, but please know that the vast majority are not assholes like that and will not violate you. I'm so sorry that happened to you.

Every one I went to as a kid was like that. And I've only gone once as an adult and same exact thing. But my husband's going to go with me and he says if anything happens, he'll beat the doctor up (he won't really but they'll have a big lawsuit on their hands).

Teddy917

Maggie0829 said:

Teddy917 said:

JCBride2014 said:

Wow.  Well, the most obvious solution is to get a Depend pad jic.  It doesn't have to be a whole diaper, they make pads and pantyliners that are more the size you would wear during your period, just extra absorbent.  I know that sounds awful and I wish your boss wasn't such a jerk, but you will probably feel better knowing that if you have leakage or a small accident, you won't be embarrassed.

And I also think it's wrong (maybe illegal) for your boss to make the bathroom rule.  Can you possibly tell him, "I have an issue that I don't want to go into, but if I need to use the restroom, I'm going to do it."  Would he notice if you went to the bathroom without telling him?  What would happen if you just went?

And yes, get thee to your doctor.  It might be as simple as a UTI but it should be checked out.

My manager would write me up. The funny thing is that company policy is that if I don't sign the write up, it doesn't count. He would notice unfortunately if I just slipped out to use the restroom. Even if he didn't see me, there's a shift leader that hates me and tries to find something that I do wrong.

I would just tell your manager that he either lets you use the bathroom when you need to or risk major health issues since you will just have to pee yourself.

Deciding when people are and aren't allowed to use the bathroom is by far the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard of. Do you only have one manager? Heck I would even take this complaint up with your franchisee or even corporate.

Only one GM, yes. Unfortunately the owner of the Utah branches loves him and isn't fond of me.

Maggie0829

Teddy917 said:

Wow.  Well, the most obvious solution is to get a Depend pad jic.  It doesn't have to be a whole diaper, they make pads and pantyliners that are more the size you would wear during your period, just extra absorbent.  I know that sounds awful and I wish your boss wasn't such a jerk, but you will probably feel better knowing that if you have leakage or a small accident, you won't be embarrassed.

And I also think it's wrong (maybe illegal) for your boss to make the bathroom rule.  Can you possibly tell him, "I have an issue that I don't want to go into, but if I need to use the restroom, I'm going to do it."  Would he notice if you went to the bathroom without telling him?  What would happen if you just went?

And yes, get thee to your doctor.  It might be as simple as a UTI but it should be checked out.

My manager would write me up. The funny thing is that company policy is that if I don't sign the write up, it doesn't count. He would notice unfortunately if I just slipped out to use the restroom. Even if he didn't see me, there's a shift leader that hates me and tries to find something that I do wrong.

I would just tell your manager that he either lets you use the bathroom when you need to or risk major health issues since you will just have to pee yourself. Deciding when people are and aren't allowed to use the bathroom is by far the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard of. Do you only have one manager? Heck I would even take this complaint up with your franchisee or even corporate.

Only one GM, yes. Unfortunately the owner of the Utah branches loves him and isn't fond of me.

Well then I would go to corporate and complain.

JennyColada

The doctor MAY touch your lower back (to feel for kidney pain) or your abdominal area, but generally you'll remain clothed and he should NOT touch your breasts (or even vaginal area) for a UTI.

Senecaf

Wow, that is terrible. I'm pretty sure that rule is illegal. Go to the Dr as soon as you can. Or if you really don't want to take time off work go to urge cate. Take your husband with your for peace of mind

pinkshorts27

I take my FI with me when I go see a new doctor, that might help you feel comfortable. Always ask why they are doing things and report them if they do something inappropriate. 

Also I've had way too many UTI's in my life (I had bladder reflux), the first sign is having to pee more than normal and having to pee when I just peed. 

HaileyDancingbear

I think you may have a UTI.  Right before my high school graduation I had a UTI, and I did have to pee like every 20 minutes.  Even if I didn't drink anything and there was nothing that needed to come out, I felt like I had to pee immediately or I'd wet myself.  

But I knew we didn't have any insurance, so I didn't mention it and just kinda put up with it, until one day I was so lethargic I couldn't even get out of bed- I tried to stand up and collapsed!  No amount of rest gave me enough energy to move.  Turns out by not treating the UTI, I let it become a full blown kidney infection, and I was extremely sick.  Please don't be a dummy like I was and get treated ASAP, a UTI isn't that bad but if left untreated it can develop into something much worse.

Also I'm pretty sure it's illegal for your boss to limit your bathroom breaks.  I'm sorry your boss is so shitty, that rule is just flat out abusing his employees.  

Fran1985

Have you talked to your husband about how bad its gotten? I remember your other post about him and how controlling he seemed- the line about making you go to work doesn't really make me feel any better about the situation.

But the boss certainly cannot dictate when you can use the restroom. Hope the Dr visit goes well

JCbride2015

@Jennycolado-- oh yeah, forgot the peeing in a cup thing.  I had a spate of reoccurring UTI's a few years ago and a couple times I just called my doctor and described the symptoms, then he called in the prescription.

But usually with a UTI there are other symptoms like pain and burning, which is why I said, don't be shocked if you doc wants to actually do an exam.

And OP, I am horrified to hear about that doctor you saw as a kid!  And that your mom didn't do anything!!  You are totally right to be apprehensive about doctors now.

firebabe6519

@Teddy917 if you are in the States he cannot legally refuse you bathroom access at anytime. Nor can they limit the time spent in the restroom. And if he does you simply inform him that you will have a lawyer in touch. Also keep any write up for using the restroom. That would be proof enough to destroy that company. Olive Garden tried to do this to their employees, but they quickly backed down once the employees threatened suit. (Another reason I hate and utterly refuse to support that company.)

I'm sorry you are having to deal with this. At the very least please call the Better Business Bureau and report them. This should not be allowed to go on, and if it takes getting hefty fines to change your managment's stance on the matter, so be it.

Teddy917

Fran1985 said:

Have you talked to your husband about how bad its gotten? I remember your other post about him and how controlling he seemed- the line about making you go to work doesn't really make me feel any better about the situation.

But the boss certainly cannot dictate when you can use the restroom. Hope the Dr visit goes well

He's just worried that we'll definitely be going into debt to get this fixed and I was only given three shifts this past week (our week is Wednesday to Tuesday, so still sort of this week) and I missed one of those shifts because I was sick. He actually is pretty supportive, even suggested quiting (this isn't the first stupid rule, plus they make me feel worthless) until he realized we wouldn't be able to afford even bare necessities without it.

Teddy917

JCBride2014 said:

@Jennycolado-- oh yeah, forgot the peeing in a cup thing.  I had a spate of reoccurring UTI's a few years ago and a couple times I just called my doctor and described the symptoms, then he called in the prescription.

But usually with a UTI there are other symptoms like pain and burning, which is why I said, don't be shocked if you doc wants to actually do an exam.

And OP, I am horrified to hear about that doctor you saw as a kid!  And that your mom didn't do anything!!  You are totally right to be apprehensive about doctors now.

It's not really a burning and I've got a high pain tolerance but it does feel like there's a bunch of sharp knives being stab into there.

HaileyDancingbear

@teddy917 I think you should start applying for other jobs- this one sounds like it's crap and treats you poorly.  Get some applications out before you give your two weeks notice so that you can just go from one job to another.  

Teddy917

HaileyDancingbear said:

@teddy917 I think you should start applying for other jobs- this one sounds like it's crap and treats you poorly.  Get some applications out before you give your two weeks notice so that you can just go from one job to another.  

I have been applying everywhere. Taco Bell (or at least the one by me) does open interviews which I'll be going to on Tuesday.