So I was invited

pinkcow13

To a gender reveal party. I never thought I would be invited to one. I never even heard of one until recently, and I can't remember where, although I know it was mentioned here. I shouldn't be surprised as this girl is a (self proclaimed, and rightfully so) "selfie queen" who will be having 3 baby showers. I texted FI earlier to let him know we were invited to a BBQ and the gender reveal the following weekend (it is for his cousin and his cousin's gf), and he responded "WTF. Gender reveal? Is that a thing?"

So it looks like we will be going on the 17th, location TBD. She is hosting the party. I feel like this will be interesting. Although I think the cat is already out of the bag. His cousin's mom is FI's Aunt, so of course she told FMIL, who in turn told FI. By the time the party comes around, I feel that everyone will know by then. Has anyone even been to one of these?? I don't even know what to expect. And I would hope that this is not a gift giving event. Well, back to my wine I go. Wine makes everything better:) 

AddieCake

I confess I like gender reveals.

Sugargirl1019

I like them too, but I like super cute frilly things. I do not believe it is a gift giving event, but for those who chose to bring a gift it was something gender neutral.

chibiyui

I would not treat it like as a gift giving event. 

So, by cat out of the bag do you mean people already know the gender? Cause that really defeats the entire purpose of a party devoted to finding out the gender so as to start pushing expected societal gender roles before the baby is even born. 

pinkcow13

I guess I'm not a fan of them lol. I just see them as being kinda pointless. And yea, I know that some people already know the gender. I personally don't, I figure I might as well just wait to the party or it will defeat the purpose of even going as @chibiyui stated.

HisGirlFriday13

A friend of mine has been invited to one. Every time the creator of the event tags my friend in the FB event, it shows up in my newsfeed.

This person, whom I don't know from Adam, is being a little OTT in her plans, and it's weirding me out that I can see them. I keep 'hiding' them on FB, but they keep coming back.

I've never been to one, but I think they're cute, in a way. I don't know if I'd ever do one (DH gets to decide if find out the baby's gender when I get PG.)

It's weird, though, if some/most people know before the party. That defeats the purpose IMHO.

pinkcow13

Now I kinda feel like a grinch! Although I also don't like baby showers, so I guess I wouldn't be a fan of a gender reveal party. Well, yea I feel that by the time the party comes, most people will know the gender. That's the grandmas fault for not keeping the secret lol. FMIL will probably end up spilling it to me also, although I'd rather wait till the party to find out.

HisGirlFriday13

pinkcow13 said:

Now I kinda feel like a grinch! Although I also don't like baby showers, so I guess I wouldn't be a fan of a gender reveal party. Well, yea I feel that by the time the party comes, most people will know the gender. That's the grandmas fault for not keeping the secret lol. FMIL will probably end up spilling it to me also, although I'd rather wait till the party to find out.

Don't feel like a grinch! If it's not your cup of tea, that's OK. It doesn't have to be.

But telling the grandmas is a guarantee that everyone will know. My SIL found out the other week that it's a boy for baby number two and her sister, her mother, and my mother all blasted it all over FB within hours.

theartistformerlyknownas

I like any excuse for cake. I hope there's cake.

BreMR

Okay, I just have to say, babies are such a big deal now.  I mean, I only had a kid six years ago and these types of gender reveal parties, or weekly pregnancy picture updates, and ultrasound pics, and everything were not shared with the world.  I think that people overestimate how much others care about their pregnancy.

Maybe that's just my snarky opinion, but gender reveals seem like something for immediate family... not a huge event.

banana468

I hope the reveal is in a layer of cake!

I think the gender reveal can be cute but it's also totally AWish.

For us, we kept the gender to ourselves until my birthday on the 6th and then DD got to announce,"Sprout is a boy! " That was enough for us.

kmmssg

banana468 said:

I hope the reveal is in a layer of cake! I think the gender reveal can be cute but it's also totally AWish. For us, we kept the gender to ourselves until my birthday on the 6th and then DD got to announce,"Sprout is a boy! " That was enough for us.

Congrats!  So what do we call a boy if a girl is Chiquita?

ohmrs2014

I think gender reveal parties are cute, but I don't think they are meant to be parties per say.  My DH has actually mentioned them, but in terms of just inviting our parents and siblings, possibly our close friends, which would be no more than 10 people in total, basically like a dinner party.  Have some good food and a surprise cake or cupcakes.  LOL.  

pinkcow13

@hisgirlfriday13, that's exactly what I thought, if they wanted to keep it a secret, telling grandma was the wrong way to go, lol! She was definitely the first one to post about the pregnancy on FB.

@lolo83, I also hope there is cake, or cupcakes! Although, May is supposed to be my "good healthy month," although we'll see how that goes.

Yea I definitely feel like it's kinda AWish, which is probably why I'm partly not a huge fan. To me, a post on FB after telling VIP's is more than enough!

pinkcow13

kmmssg said:

banana468 said:

I hope the reveal is in a layer of cake!

I think the gender reveal can be cute but it's also totally AWish.

For us, we kept the gender to ourselves until my birthday on the 6th and then DD got to announce,"Sprout is a boy! " That was enough for us.

Congrats!  So what do we call a boy if a girl is Chiquita?

Chiquito

cupcait927

AddieCake said:

I confess I like gender reveals.

I confess I like them too. Especially if there's cake.

csuave

I've never been to one but I have enjoyed a gender reveal cake pop.  My work friend brought cake pops into the office.  The inside was blue.  Everyone at work enjoyed them and it was a fun way for her to tell the office.

MollyandD

I've only heard of gender reveals as part of the baby shower, until I read things on here. The couples I know have registered for gender neutral things, and then they reveal the gender at the shower with all the family and friends that could make it. Some do it with the color of a cake, and I know one girl that kept the envelope from the doctor sealed. She found out with the guests. I don't have that kind of self control. I'd need to know sooner, and I'd tell everyone.

pinkcow13

Molly&Domenic said:

I've only heard of gender reveals as part of the baby shower, until I read things on here. The couples I know have registered for gender neutral things, and then they reveal the gender at the shower with all the family and friends that could make it. Some do it with the color of a cake, and I know one girl that kept the envelope from the doctor sealed. She found out with the guests. I don't have that kind of self control. I'd need to know sooner, and I'd tell everyone.

Actually I think I've heard of those. Never attended one, usually by the time a baby shower comes along the couple knows the gender- unless they decide not to find out. A whole other party seems like a lot. To each their own, though! Cake and wine will make me happy at any party

HisGirlFriday13

50ShadesofMe said:

I think gender reveal parties are cute, but I don't think they are meant to be parties per say.  My DH has actually mentioned them, but in terms of just inviting our parents and siblings, possibly our close friends, which would be no more than 10 people in total, basically like a dinner party.  Have some good food and a surprise cake or cupcakes.  LOL.  

My DH has also mentioned this. His rationale is 'then everyone will know all at once.'

I can kind of see his point. I told him there had to be cake.

IrishPirate60

Gender reveal here is so sophisticated that the sonogram results get emailed to the bakery. The bakery makes the cake the appropriate color, then frosts it neutrally. Cake gets delivered to the party (so no one can cut into and refrost). People gather. Cake gets cut. First slice reveals the gender.

I think it's slightly creepy to have the loop go through the bakery myself...

HisGirlFriday13

IrishPirate60 said:

Gender reveal here is so sophisticated that the sonogram results get emailed to the bakery. The bakery makes the cake the appropriate color, then frosts it neutrally. Cake gets delivered to the party (so no one can cut into and refrost). People gather. Cake gets cut. First slice reveals the gender.

I think it's slightly creepy to have the loop go through the bakery myself...

Here, the sonogram tech just writes it on a piece of paper, puts it in an envelope and seals it, and the parents take it to the bakery.

At my old.job, the sister of one of my co-workers was having a baby. My CW bought two sets of baby booties, one pink and one blue. Her sister had the gender-determining sonogram, the tech wrote it on a piece of paper and sealed it in an envelope. My CW gave that piece of paper and the booties to her BFF, who wrapped one set and donated the other to a locale pregnancy centre.

The CW had a gender-reveal party for her sister where she unwrapped the booties and found out. (It was a girl.)

pinkcow13

HisGirlFriday13 said:

Gender reveal here is so sophisticated that the sonogram results get emailed to the bakery. The bakery makes the cake the appropriate color, then frosts it neutrally. Cake gets delivered to the party (so no one can cut into and refrost). People gather. Cake gets cut. First slice reveals the gender.

I think it's slightly creepy to have the loop go through the bakery myself...

Here, the sonogram tech just writes it on a piece of paper, puts it in an envelope and seals it, and the parents take it to the bakery. At my old.job, the sister of one of my co-workers was having a baby. My CW bought two sets of baby booties, one pink and one blue. Her sister had the gender-determining sonogram, the tech wrote it on a piece of paper and sealed it in an envelope. My CW gave that piece of paper and the booties to her BFF, who wrapped one set and donated the other to a locale pregnancy centre. The CW had a gender-reveal party for her sister where she unwrapped the booties and found out. (It was a girl.)

That's actually kind of cool. I had no idea they did it like that, I just assumed the parents went to a bakery and revealed the gender, and the cake was made. Although, can't they just do that without giving the bakery a sonogram? If I decide to do something like that, it would probably just be with our parents, it would be a cute way to reveal it to them.

wandajune6

I always thought this was just a Pinterest thing...

The idea is cute but isn't it very personal? I've never had a kid but I can't imagine sharing that information with anyone before talking about it with FI first.

Maggie0829

BreMR said:

Okay, I just have to say, babies are such a big deal now.  I mean, I only had a kid six years ago and these types of gender reveal parties, or weekly pregnancy picture updates, and ultrasound pics, and everything were not shared with the world.  I think that people overestimate how much others care about their pregnancy.

Maybe that's just my snarky opinion, but gender reveals seem like something for immediate family... not a huge event.

Well 6 years ago social media wasn't as prevalent as it is now.  With social media being so big everyone thinks that what they do is interesting and that the world is dying to know.  So even though people probably care about a pregnancy now as much as they did 6 years, those that are pregnant (or getting married or buying a house or what have you) believe that people actually care more.

I personally don't like gender reveal parties.  I just don't understand them.  I had a friend who set up an easter egg hunt for his family to find out the gender.  He filmed it and put it on facebook. When they found out that the couple was having a boy the started jumping up and down and freaking out.  I looked at my H and asked "Hmm, I wonder how they would have reacted if it had been a girl?  Probably the exact same way!"  So I just don't get it.  I get the immediate family being excited about the gender but beyond that I just don't see people caring about what is in between your babies legs all that much.

selenathegreat

I mean, if it's an excuse for cake and booze I'm down. Other than that it's a bit silly. All the sending sealed envelopes to the bakery is a bit too Mission Impossible for me.

NavyBlue143

I think there is way too much hoopla involved with special events these days. Everything requires its own party and photo shoot. I don't get it.

The only time I cared about a gender reveal was a coworker/ friend of mine who had lost her first child to anacephaly. So while we all just wanted this baby to be healthy, we were excited to find out if it was a boy or girl.

H really wants to do a pregnancy announcement picture though. He's a gamer, so he wants a picture of us on the couch with controllers in our hands and a controller between us, and the caption "Waiting for player 3" I think it's corny, but it's adorable that he's all about it, so we'll do it.

rajahmd

I don't get gender reveals either. There's only two options- not that big of a surprise. I also have negative feelings about them after I went to a poorly done gender reveal party. It was billed as a birthday party for the mom, where they would find out what the baby would be. So we all thought it would be a surprise to everyone, even the parents. Nope! After the big reveal with the cake, the mom-to-be let it slip that they knew ahead of time. I'm pretty sure some of the family already knew too. It frustrated both DH and I, and made us feel used.

So yeah, I don't like them. It's not like it matters anyway, until they pop out. I personally want to be surprised at birth when we have kids. I don't want to have any preconceived notions about what the kid will be like until they get here. 

vk2204

I am not a fan of them. I think they can be extremely AWish. The parents are not finding out the gender of the baby, they are finding out the sex of the baby. I can understand if it is like immediate family only, but to actually throw a party is over the top in my opinion.

pinkcow13

Maggie0829, that's exactly what it is. Like we tell brides, no one cares about your wedding like you and you FI do, it's the same with babies. In fact, I told my FI last night that no one cares about the gender of the baby except for the parents and (in most cases) the grandparents. I could see revealing it in a cute way to the grandparents, especially if your parents are into that sort of thing, but other than that it just seems like a bit much.

wandajune6, I also think it's personal. FI would definitely be the first to know, followed by our parents/closest friends. After that, IDK. I'm not sure I would want to do the FB sonogram pic. I think I would just let it be word of mouth from there on out. 

emmaaa

I likegender receal parties. I think they can be cute, but I like cute things.

A girl I know was having her second baby and didn't do another shower, so they did a reveal. They used the whole "balloons in the box" idea. Well, it turned out really cute because they all unwraped it and started opening the box. Before anyone else saw the color of the balloons, she did, and FREAKED out. She was having a girl! It was really sweet and she still gets joked with about her reaction.