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NWR: The pain...

InkdancerInkdancer member
First Comment First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
Just watched my boss throw away a hand-calligraphied thank-you note. I almost wept.
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Re: NWR: The pain...

  • mysticlmysticl member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    Ouch.  I'm sure it wasn't personal but he/she could have at least waited and done that at home. 
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  • AddieCakeAddieCake member
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    From you?
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • HisGirlFriday13HisGirlFriday13 member
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    If it's not from you, why is this painful?

    TBH, I throw away thank-yous basically as soon as I get them, too.
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    I'm gonna go with 'not my circus, not my monkeys.'
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  • AddieCakeAddieCake member
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    I throw away almost all cards, letters, etc right away.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
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    I'm sure none of the hand-calligraphied invitations I did for my own bat mitzvah and my brother's bar mitzvah still exist.  When I was a teenager I was into calligraphy, and my mom asked me to help with that.
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  • RebeccaFlowerRebeccaFlower member
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    I also toss them within a day or two.
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  • InkdancerInkdancer member
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    He opened it, skimmed it, and tossed it. What bothered me was the absolute lack of regard for the time she took to write such a neat and kind note (it was long, not just a short thanks).

    I definitely understand tossing notes within a few days, but the second you open it?
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  • AddieCakeAddieCake member
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    But why keep it? What's he supposed to do, keep going back and admiring the calligraphy?
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 member
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    Inkdancer said:
    He opened it, skimmed it, and tossed it. What bothered me was the absolute lack of regard for the time she took to write such a neat and kind note (it was long, not just a short thanks).

    I definitely understand tossing notes within a few days, but the second you open it?
    How do you know that your boss completely disregarded the note?  He read it, took in the words, and then tossed it.  This is not a big deal.  At all.  And you have no way of knowing what he thought or how he felt about the note.  He could have been very touched by the words, but go on assuming the worst.

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  • InkdancerInkdancer member
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    Maybe I'm weird, but when I get a nice note I keep it. I still have a thank-you note from a friend pinned to my fridge, because it was so sweet.

    (Again, does not apply to notes that are one or two sentences long. This was a full-on letter.)
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  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 member
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    Inkdancer said:
    Maybe I'm weird, but when I get a nice note I keep it. I still have a thank-you note from a friend pinned to my fridge, because it was so sweet.

    (Again, does not apply to notes that are one or two sentences long. This was a full-on letter.)
    That is fine if you like to keep nice notes.  But not everyone is like that and I think it is crazy to assume something bad about your boss because he doesn't do what you do.

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  • InkdancerInkdancer member
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    Maggie0829 said:
    Inkdancer said:
    Maybe I'm weird, but when I get a nice note I keep it. I still have a thank-you note from a friend pinned to my fridge, because it was so sweet.

    (Again, does not apply to notes that are one or two sentences long. This was a full-on letter.)
    That is fine if you like to keep nice notes.  But not everyone is like that and I think it is crazy to assume something bad about your boss because he doesn't do what you do.
    I guess that's fair. It seemed disrespectful to me, but I suppose you can't keep drawers of old thank-you notes when you're a VP either.
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  • HisGirlFriday13HisGirlFriday13 member
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    Not to be rude, but unless you read it, you don't know that it's nice and kind. All you know Is that it was hand-calligraphed. It could have been a beautiful example of penmanship and a crappy note.
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    I'm gonna go with 'not my circus, not my monkeys.'
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  • InkdancerInkdancer member
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    HisGirlFriday13 said:
    Not to be rude, but unless you read it, you don't know that it's nice and kind. All you know Is that it was hand-calligraphed. It could have been a beautiful example of penmanship and a crappy note.
    I did read it-- the envelope was addressed to Marketing so it came to me and I gave it to him.
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  • MrsMack10612MrsMack10612 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer First Comment
    edited May 2014
    If it was just addressed to Marketing, it doesn't seem like it was a very personal note to begin with.

    ETA:  I used to keep all kinds of birthday, thank you, whatever cards.  We have a very strong packrat gene in my family.  Several years ago I stopped and now I keep only special ones.  For example:  my mom passed away in January.  I will probably keep the Christmas card I got until I die.

     

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  • KGold80KGold80 member
    First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    *shrug* some people just don't save stuff like that. I just threw away a very nice thank you note I received from a co-worker for whom we threw a baby shower last week.
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  • emmyg65emmyg65 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    This is a great example of why you should focus on the details on your wedding only if they're important to you, and do it for yourself, not to impress others. We made pretty detailed favors because it was really fun for us, so we weren't hurt that some were left behind. Remember: No one's as excited about your wedding as you are!
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