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Snarky Brides

*Updated in post* How do you feel about the WP dancing back from the altar?

2

Re: *Updated in post* How do you feel about the WP dancing back from the altar?

  • FiancBFiancB MinnesOOOta member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    beethery said:
    I love to dance. Get me a few drinks, put on some 90's hip-hop, and I'm breaking it down. Put on a goofy song, and I dance like a humongous goob. Do I want to be part of a wedding where I have to dance for the duration of A WHOLE SONG while no one else is dancing? Heeellllll the fuck no.

    Bride needs to get a grip!
    This. I think it's cheesy and overdone these days, but I can deal if everybody's together and it's ONE SONG. 8 sounds like torture. 

    I mean if you're all part of a dance troupe and your friends are all members of the Rockettes or NYCBallet, it could go well. Otherwise, forget it. 
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    beethery
  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 Ravens & Bohs & Crabs & O's member
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    kmmssg said:
    Am I the only one stunned that the minister would allow this?  Now that is based on the assumption that the wedding is taking place in a church with an altar.  The only 2 Pastors that I know really well on a social level would forbid that crap in a nanosecond if the wedding were being held at the altar of the church.  They consider it sacred.

    I honestly eye-roll this kind of stuff.  You KNOW the BP would rather rip their fingernails off than dance down the aisle.
    I think that first big dance down the aisle video that hit YouTube and the news with a vengeance a few years ago was a wedding that took place in a church.  So it really depends on the church and the officiant.

    But why doesn't she just do this for the reception introductions instead of the recessional?  No one gives a fuck about the recessional.  The guests are too busy standing up, gathering their shit, adjusting their clothes, and talking about what kind of food is going to be served and how they can't wait to get a glass of wine or a beer.

  • MairePoppyMairePoppy Connecticut mod
    Moderator Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    edited May 2014
    kmmssg said:
    Am I the only one stunned that the minister would allow this?  Now that is based on the assumption that the wedding is taking place in a church with an altar.  The only 2 Pastors that I know really well on a social level would forbid that crap in a nanosecond if the wedding were being held at the altar of the church.  They consider it sacred.

    I honestly eye-roll this kind of stuff.  You KNOW the BP would rather rip their fingernails off than dance down the aisle.
    Although I no longer participate, I grew up in the Catholic church, belonging to three different parishes. I can't imagine any of the priests I have known allowing such a display. While I think some might smile at a spontaneous expression of joy by the couple, planning out a popular song for each member of the wedding party to dance in the aisles wouldn't be tolerated. And hey, the ceremony is supposed to be about the couple's commitment to each other and God, right? And since marriage is considered a sacrament, most priests insist on sacred music for the ceremony.
                       
  • Marzipan13Marzipan13 member
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    edited May 2014
    kmmssg said:
    Am I the only one stunned that the minister would allow this?  Now that is based on the assumption that the wedding is taking place in a church with an altar.  The only 2 Pastors that I know really well on a social level would forbid that crap in a nanosecond if the wedding were being held at the altar of the church.  They consider it sacred.

    I honestly eye-roll this kind of stuff.  You KNOW the BP would rather rip their fingernails off than dance down the aisle.
    Although I no longer participate, I grew up in the Catholic church, belonging to three different parishes. I can't imagine any of the priests I have known allowing such a display. While I think some might smile at a spontaneous expression of joy by the couple, planning out a popular song for each member of the wedding party to dance in the aisles wouldn't be tolerated. And hey, the ceremony is supposed to be about the couple's commitment to each other and God, right? And since marriage is considered a sacrament, most priests insist on sacred music for the ceremony.

    ----ETF: DAMN BOX----

    All of this is absolutely true - I'm assuming OP means this wedding is taking place in a non-denominational church, or at least some church that wouldn't mind secular music & dancing.  

    The Catholic Church does not allow this, and also does not allow secular music to be used for any part of the Mass (or Catholic ceremony w/o Communion).  Occasionally, the organist will be allowed (per the priest's permission) to play a secular tune before the procession (which is technically part of the Mass) - for example, we've had a lot of brides request an instrumental version of "A Thousand Years" lately, and our organist plays it as a prelude while people are sitting down.  

    Even still, if this is being held at a church that would allow dancing at any point in the service, I seriously dislike this idea.  It's too clunky and forced, especially if your BMs / GMs aren't on board.  
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  • I think the rehearsal is going to be a disaster! Imagine explaining this to groomsmen the night before the wedding?!?!

    H was just in a wedding and they were all late getting to the RD after the rehearsal. I met them all at the RD. H kept saying what an unorganized disaster the whole thing was and it was tortuous how long it took.

    So I was intrigued the next day to see what could possibly be so confusing that it took 1hr 30 min to rehearse this...to my disappointment it was nothing special. WP members walked down the aisle and sat in first pew while B&G with MOH and BM were up front. There were two readers that had to walk over to read and then walk back.... 

    Anyways.... the idea of adding all this chorogaphy sounds like a nightmare!
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  • VulgarGirlVulgarGirl Desert Oasis member
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    @flantastic, your story reminds me of when I was in my friend's wedding, the DOC made us rehearse walking up and down the aisle, no joke, 10 times. Because she didn't want anyone to mess it up the day of the wedding. I made a joke about walking in a straight line and passing a roadside soberity test, and got reprimanded because "This is a wedding! This is no joking matter! Weddings are not funny!", which prompted me to whisper to the bride "Are you laughing? There's no laughing in weddings!" and then she laughed so hard the DOC gave her the direst look. And that is also why teachers would never let us sit together in school.
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    chibiyuiejpentecostHisGirlFriday13hellohkb
  • krcb said:
    I'm in an upcoming wedding where we will all dance back down the aisle after the bride and groom say their vows. The bride and groom, 5 bridesmaids/groomsmen, and each set of parents will each have their own song - totaling 8 different songs. It will be 9 if they can convince the pastor to dance down to one too. I've seen the videos where there's one song played for everyone going back down the aisle but for each pair of people? Seems like a bit much to me.

    We won't practice anything until the rehearsal dinner and most of the GM have NO idea this will be occuring.

    How do you feel about WP dances before/after the ceremony? I thought the first few I saw were kinda funny/cute, but I see it so much now (as far as the Internet goes) that I just cringe at the idea, especially with so many songs. I'm going to rock my dance the best way I can in a floor length dress and heels in grass. I'm probably going to bust it. I am not a heel wearer - especially in grass! I guess I'll get to practicing my dance outside in the dress and heels!

    This wedding is going to have so many mason jars (as favors, no less - I've received a mason jar with burlap for every bridal shower), burlap, cutesy signs, matching wedding day outfits, etc. that I feel like we have stepped into Pinterest hell and may never return.
    I think it's stupid.  I mean, if an individual is excited and wants to dance, more power to them and I think that's great.  But planning it?  No.  Just no.

    I actually refused to dance INTO a wedding reception once as a BM.  The GM I was paired with also thought it was stupid, which helped.  We walked in smiling and waving like normal people.

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  • krcbkrcb member
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    I think the rehearsal is going to be a disaster! Imagine explaining this to groomsmen the night before the wedding?!?!

    H was just in a wedding and they were all late getting to the RD after the rehearsal. I met them all at the RD. H kept saying what an unorganized disaster the whole thing was and it was tortuous how long it took.

    So I was intrigued the next day to see what could possibly be so confusing that it took 1hr 30 min to rehearse this...to my disappointment it was nothing special. WP members walked down the aisle and sat in first pew while B&G with MOH and BM were up front. There were two readers that had to walk over to read and then walk back.... 

    Anyways.... the idea of adding all this chorogaphy sounds like a nightmare!
    Oh my goodness. I can't imagine how long the rehearsal is going to be. Should I even have FI go with me for the rehearsal dinner (it's at the same place)? I feel like this may torture him.
  • krcbkrcb member
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    And for those of you wondering, the ceremony is not at a church and is being officiated by a Baptist minister. I'm not sure if he knows about it.
  • krcbkrcb member
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    I'll be sure to give an update this weekend! As for now, I gave FI a pass at coming to the rehearsal dinner since it's at the same place, and no one is sure what time it'll start. 

    I was discussing this with my mom and I said that I'll give the whole thing around 3 hours, then I'm leaving. She immediately said, "Don't you leave! It's HER day!" God help me.
  • beetherybeethery So sayeth the fuckin' Pope. member
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    @krcb I hope you're taking separate cars lol
    --

    I'm the fuck out.

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  • ashley8918ashley8918 Chicago Suburbs member
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    If someone sprung this on me the night before, It would be a friendship ending move. I would be 5000% DONE. Actually, even if I knew ahead of time and she demanded it after I NOPED the hell out of that idea, it would have the same end result.

    I have pretty severe anxiety and I am freaking out FOR YOU. I can't imagine being in your shoes.
  • I wonder if they're planning on springing this on the minister, too.

    Because all the Baptists I know eschew dancing. And definitely not in church.
    Anniversary

    image
    I'm gonna go with 'not my circus, not my monkeys.'
  • krcbkrcb member
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    edited May 2014
    My guess is the minister will find out it is happening as it is happening. I don't foresee him getting a call, and they do not attend his church to mention it in passing.


    I have a question for whoever sees this:
    Would it be bad taste to go from this rehearsal to an event that night to see my possible entertainment? As far as bridesmaids go, we aren't doing anything after the dinner. I would invite the bride to go along (it's at a bar), but she and her MOH are already going to be spending the night together. Plus, it's not like she owns my time.

    According to my mom, I'm a bad bridesmaid and the idea of me "leaving the rehearsal dinner" makes her (yes, my mother) mad. The rehearsal's at 5 - the band plays at 10:30. I would hope it would be over before then?? If not, surely I can leave after giving that much time.
  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    10000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    No no no no no.
    No no no no no no no.
    No no no no NO!
  • beetherybeethery So sayeth the fuckin' Pope. member
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    krcb said:
    My guess is the minister will find out it is happening as it is happening. I don't foresee him getting a call, and they do not attend his church to mention it in passing.


    I have a question for whoever sees this:
    Would it be bad taste to go from this rehearsal to an event that night to see my possible entertainment? As far as bridesmaids go, we aren't doing anything after the dinner. I would invite the bride to go along (it's at a bar), but she and her MOH are already going to be spending the night together. Plus, it's not like she owns my time.

    According to my mom, I'm a bad bridesmaid and the idea of me "leaving the rehearsal dinner" makes her (yes, my mother) mad. The rehearsal's at 5 - the band plays at 10:30. I would hope it would be over before then?? If not, surely I can leave after giving that much time.
    I'd consider myself in the clear to leave after dinner was finished by everybody, and I'd thanked the hosts. Unless it's a 25 course meal and someone is ingesting their nutrition through mitosis. Then I would be like fuck this, I'm out.
    --

    I'm the fuck out.

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  • krcb said:
    My guess is the minister will find out it is happening as it is happening. I don't foresee him getting a call, and they do not attend his church to mention it in passing.


    I have a question for whoever sees this:
    Would it be bad taste to go from this rehearsal to an event that night to see my possible entertainment? As far as bridesmaids go, we aren't doing anything after the dinner. I would invite the bride to go along (it's at a bar), but she and her MOH are already going to be spending the night together. Plus, it's not like she owns my time.

    According to my mom, I'm a bad bridesmaid and the idea of me "leaving the rehearsal dinner" makes her (yes, my mother) mad. The rehearsal's at 5 - the band plays at 10:30. I would hope it would be over before then?? If not, surely I can leave after giving that much time.
    Hell. No.

    Your duties as a BM at the RD end when dinner is over, just as your duties as a BM end when the wedding photos are over -- after that, you're just a guest.

    Go, have fun!
    Anniversary

    image
    I'm gonna go with 'not my circus, not my monkeys.'
  • HaileyDancingbearHaileyDancingbear Arkham Asylum member
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    OP, I think you should watch the "Gay wedding" skit from Portlandia, because reading this thread totally reminds me of it and it's cracking me up. 


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    Marzipan13krcb
  • pinkcow13pinkcow13 The Concrete Jungle member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    My cousin did this at his wedding. This exact thing. Except, if I remember correctly, they did this as each member of the WP walked down the aisle, in the beginning of the ceremony. For the end, they played one song and everyone just danced out. I personally found it awkward and unneccessary.
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    krcb
  • thisismynickname2thisismynickname2 City By The Lake member
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    My opinion on the original post/inquiry is not to do that in a church or place of worship. I see it as disrespectful and undignified. 

    Non-religious wedding? Do whatever your little heart desires.  And leave me out of it, because I can't dance. 
    ________________________________


    pinkshorts27ejpentecost
  • krcbkrcb member
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    OP, I think you should watch the "Gay wedding" skit from Portlandia, because reading this thread totally reminds me of it and it's cracking me up. 


    Loved that video!! I can only hope that the crowd will be engaged like that one was. It took an unexpected turn at the end there - haha.
    HaileyDancingbear
  • BreMRBreMR member
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    I remember the first time a dancing wedding video went viral and I thought "oh that's so cute"  It's not so cute when everyone in the world does it.  That's the problem with Pinterest, it starts out as someones' creative one of a kind idea and then everyone jumps on the bandwagon.

    I was watching Say Yes to the Dress and a woman had a piece of her mom's dress sewn into her dress since she was deceased, and it was a heart.  I thought "I saw that EXACT same idea and heart shape and placement on Pinterest"  It automatically lost any "that's so touching" factor for me.


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    FiancB
  • climbingwifeclimbingwife NYC 'burbs member
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    This is really a spectacularly terrible idea. Please report back! 

  • krcbkrcb member
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    edited May 2014
    So here's how the rehearsal went!

    The bride and groom turned toward the crowd after being officially wed and "Sexy and I Know It" begins to play. Preacher makes a very astonished face, with eyes wide and mouth slightly agape. This quickly turns into a frown as he watches but never once says anything. No one did a big production of a dance. Pretty much everyone did nothing except a little bit of a shake here and there. Not even the bride.

    Groomsmen were completely taken aback but 2 of 4 were willing to come up with something - everyone is going to learn their dances tomorrow. That'll be interesting...being the day of and all. It shouldn't be too hard though.

    But here's the part where I ROCKED it. When it was my turn, I had a dance ready and everything. I figured since I was going to be doing this anyway, I may as well put effort into it. Let's just say I got a lot of laughs and heard about it all evening. :) No one expected it because of how quiet/reserved I am. I essentially got everyone else into doing their part. 
    theartistformerlyknownasMairePoppyluckysnorkelKeptInStitches
  • theartistformerlyknownastheartistformerlyknownas peaced out. member
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    Omgomgomg. That look you saw on his face...that was the minister pooping himself. I can't wait to hear how the actual ceremony goes!

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    beetheryBlue_Bird
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