The Money Talk Update in comments

cleveralias

I say Dallas to anyone NOT from Dallas.  If they live in the city, I'll usually go ahead and say Addison, because its a pretty known little burb. 

huskypuppy14

Will this thread be in next weeks newsletter?

mrs4everhart

OP, I don't care one way or the other, I'm just calling bullshit on your whole post. Cherry Creek is an affluent neighborhood in Denver. I happen to live in Park Hill, another neighborhood in Denver. If someone asked me where I lived, I'd say Denver unless I was speaking to someone with knowledge of the city and they were trying to get a feel for approximately where I was located. If you truly live here you know damn well that CC isn't a town unto itself. So if you're legit you really are attempting to make yourself sound posh because just saying "Denver" doesn't amount to much. If you're full of it, you hit the nail on the head with neighborhoods. But you should have just thrown out Aspen and been done with it. 

dbacksgirl

Maggie0829 said:

I went to $50K wedding once.  Even though we were hosted appropriately I really wasn't all that impressed.  I really couldn't tell the difference between the $50K wedding and the $20K wedding I had gone to the previous month.  And both weddings were located in the same city so that didn't play a factor at all.

I don't mean this in snarky way at all; I'm genuinely curious.  If you couldn't tell the difference, how do you know how much both weddings cost?  Outside of forums like this, do people generally talk  about how much their weddings cost in passing conversation? 

Maggie0829

dbacksgirl said:

Maggie0829 said:

I went to $50K wedding once.  Even though we were hosted appropriately I really wasn't all that impressed.  I really couldn't tell the difference between the $50K wedding and the $20K wedding I had gone to the previous month.  And both weddings were located in the same city so that didn't play a factor at all.

I don't mean this in snarky way at all; I'm genuinely curious.  If you couldn't tell the difference, how do you know how much both weddings cost?  Outside of forums like this, do people generally talk  about how much their weddings cost in passing conversation? 

Because both weddings were for close friends who talked constantly about their budgets/wedding plans (and how much things were costing) so I was "lucky" to know the details.  The one was stressing about her small budget while the other almost seemed to brag about her larger budget.  In the end, both were pretty weddings but neither one stood out from the other.

But I agree typically people don't generally talk about money but for some reason when it comes to weddings I find that my friends tend to talk about money a lot.  Like they are excited because they got a great photographer for X when they thought it would cost Y, etc, etc.  I try to block it out because I really don't want to know so much about their finances.

cleveralias

STBMrsEverhart said:

OP, I don't care one way or the other, I'm just calling bullshit on your whole post. Cherry Creek is an affluent neighborhood in Denver. I happen to live in Park Hill, another neighborhood in Denver. If someone asked me where I lived, I'd say Denver unless I was speaking to someone with knowledge of the city and they were trying to get a feel for approximately where I was located. If you truly live here you know damn well that CC isn't a town unto itself. So if you're legit you really are attempting to make yourself sound posh because just saying "Denver" doesn't amount to much. If you're full of it, you hit the nail on the head with neighborhoods. But you should have just thrown out Aspen and been done with it. 

Yep.  That is pretty much why I said what I said.  She is obviously a troll.  Her budget magically mushroomed from the 40K her sister got to 150K... she name dropped "Cherry Creek".. despite the fact that it isn't even a town unto itself, it is a neighborhood.  She's on the troll stroll.

FiancB

Maggie0829 said:

dbacksgirl said:

Maggie0829 said:

I went to $50K wedding once.  Even though we were hosted appropriately I really wasn't all that impressed.  I really couldn't tell the difference between the $50K wedding and the $20K wedding I had gone to the previous month.  And both weddings were located in the same city so that didn't play a factor at all.

I don't mean this in snarky way at all; I'm genuinely curious.  If you couldn't tell the difference, how do you know how much both weddings cost?  Outside of forums like this, do people generally talk  about how much their weddings cost in passing conversation? 

Because both weddings were for close friends who talked constantly about their budgets/wedding plans (and how much things were costing) so I was "lucky" to know the details.  The one was stressing about her small budget while the other almost seemed to brag about her larger budget.  In the end, both were pretty weddings but neither one stood out from the other.

But I agree typically people don't generally talk about money but for some reason when it comes to weddings I find that my friends tend to talk about money a lot.  Like they are excited because they got a great photographer for X when they thought it would cost Y, etc, etc.  I try to block it out because I really don't want to know so much about their finances.

SITB

Our circle is similar. I'm pretty sure we know exactly what most of the weddings we've been to have cost, except for one. FI has been in weddings that cost $50k and over $20k, both with cash bars, so I had a hard time convincing him we didn't need one with our approximately $12k budget (oh the corners we cut! ). 

As for OP, I'm calling troll. Nothing wrong with dropping money on a wedding, but the delivery is pretty piss-poor. If it is real, I wonder what the chances are of a future thread crying about retracted money promises. 

NYCBruin

FiancB said:

Maggie0829 said:

dbacksgirl said:

Maggie0829 said:

I went to $50K wedding once.  Even though we were hosted appropriately I really wasn't all that impressed.  I really couldn't tell the difference between the $50K wedding and the $20K wedding I had gone to the previous month.  And both weddings were located in the same city so that didn't play a factor at all.

I don't mean this in snarky way at all; I'm genuinely curious.  If you couldn't tell the difference, how do you know how much both weddings cost?  Outside of forums like this, do people generally talk  about how much their weddings cost in passing conversation? 

Because both weddings were for close friends who talked constantly about their budgets/wedding plans (and how much things were costing) so I was "lucky" to know the details.  The one was stressing about her small budget while the other almost seemed to brag about her larger budget.  In the end, both were pretty weddings but neither one stood out from the other.

But I agree typically people don't generally talk about money but for some reason when it comes to weddings I find that my friends tend to talk about money a lot.  Like they are excited because they got a great photographer for X when they thought it would cost Y, etc, etc.  I try to block it out because I really don't want to know so much about their finances.

SITB

Our circle is similar. I'm pretty sure we know exactly what most of the weddings we've been to have cost, except for one. FI has been in weddings that cost $50k and over $20k, both with cash bars, so I had a hard time convincing him we didn't need one with our approximately $12k budget (oh the corners we cut! ). 

As for OP, I'm calling troll. Nothing wrong with dropping money on a wedding, but the delivery is pretty piss-poor. If it is real, I wonder what the chances are of a future thread crying about retracted money promises. 

What the what?!?!  How does one have a 50k budget and not manage to figure out how to pay for alcohol?

Maggie0829

NYCBruin said:

FiancB said:

Maggie0829 said:

dbacksgirl said:

Maggie0829 said:

I went to $50K wedding once.  Even though we were hosted appropriately I really wasn't all that impressed.  I really couldn't tell the difference between the $50K wedding and the $20K wedding I had gone to the previous month.  And both weddings were located in the same city so that didn't play a factor at all.

I don't mean this in snarky way at all; I'm genuinely curious.  If you couldn't tell the difference, how do you know how much both weddings cost?  Outside of forums like this, do people generally talk  about how much their weddings cost in passing conversation? 

Because both weddings were for close friends who talked constantly about their budgets/wedding plans (and how much things were costing) so I was "lucky" to know the details.  The one was stressing about her small budget while the other almost seemed to brag about her larger budget.  In the end, both were pretty weddings but neither one stood out from the other.

But I agree typically people don't generally talk about money but for some reason when it comes to weddings I find that my friends tend to talk about money a lot.  Like they are excited because they got a great photographer for X when they thought it would cost Y, etc, etc.  I try to block it out because I really don't want to know so much about their finances.

SITB

Our circle is similar. I'm pretty sure we know exactly what most of the weddings we've been to have cost, except for one. FI has been in weddings that cost $50k and over $20k, both with cash bars, so I had a hard time convincing him we didn't need one with our approximately $12k budget (oh the corners we cut! ). 

As for OP, I'm calling troll. Nothing wrong with dropping money on a wedding, but the delivery is pretty piss-poor. If it is real, I wonder what the chances are of a future thread crying about retracted money promises. 

What the what?!?!  How does one have a 50k budget and not manage to figure out how to pay for alcohol?

Probably because they put decor and their dress as a higher priority then hosting their guests properly.

NYCBruin

Maggie0829 said:

NYCBruin said:

FiancB said:

Maggie0829 said:

dbacksgirl said:

Maggie0829 said:

I went to $50K wedding once.  Even though we were hosted appropriately I really wasn't all that impressed.  I really couldn't tell the difference between the $50K wedding and the $20K wedding I had gone to the previous month.  And both weddings were located in the same city so that didn't play a factor at all.

I don't mean this in snarky way at all; I'm genuinely curious.  If you couldn't tell the difference, how do you know how much both weddings cost?  Outside of forums like this, do people generally talk  about how much their weddings cost in passing conversation? 

Because both weddings were for close friends who talked constantly about their budgets/wedding plans (and how much things were costing) so I was "lucky" to know the details.  The one was stressing about her small budget while the other almost seemed to brag about her larger budget.  In the end, both were pretty weddings but neither one stood out from the other.

But I agree typically people don't generally talk about money but for some reason when it comes to weddings I find that my friends tend to talk about money a lot.  Like they are excited because they got a great photographer for X when they thought it would cost Y, etc, etc.  I try to block it out because I really don't want to know so much about their finances.

SITB

Our circle is similar. I'm pretty sure we know exactly what most of the weddings we've been to have cost, except for one. FI has been in weddings that cost $50k and over $20k, both with cash bars, so I had a hard time convincing him we didn't need one with our approximately $12k budget (oh the corners we cut! ). 

As for OP, I'm calling troll. Nothing wrong with dropping money on a wedding, but the delivery is pretty piss-poor. If it is real, I wonder what the chances are of a future thread crying about retracted money promises. 

What the what?!?!  How does one have a 50k budget and not manage to figure out how to pay for alcohol?

Probably because they put decor and their dress as a higher priority then hosting their guests properly.

Clearly.  I would side eye this even more than I would normally side eye a cash bar.  Although it'd be an interesting game to play at the wedding, "see how many things the couple values more than hosting their guests properly....flowers, the bride's dress, the hand engraved place cards, the custom lighting..." It would be the saddest game of I-spy ever.

photokitty

 Nothing torques me off more than a cash bar and bride in a designer dress!

VulgarGirl

photokitty said:

 Nothing torques me off more than a cash bar and bride in a designer dress!

How about a bride in an expensive dress and not enough food for the guests. Oh yeah, I've been to one. Her dress cost $5,000 (she told me), she only budgeted $500 for food. And told me she came under in the food budget. Fuck yeah she did, I stopped at McDonalds on the way home I was so hungry. 

JCbride2015

MagicInk said:

photokitty said:

 Nothing torques me off more than a cash bar and bride in a designer dress!

How about a bride in an expensive dress and not enough food for the guests. Oh yeah, I've been to one. Her dress cost $5,000 (she told me), she only budgeted $500 for food. And told me she came under in the food budget. Fuck yeah she did, I stopped at McDonalds on the way home I was so hungry. 

But that dress was her VISION!  She'll have those pictures FOREVER!

FiancB

Yeah I wasn't at that wedding but I can't fathom it either. They also had extremely expensive tux rentals, which pissed FI off. I really don't know how it was a cash bar, seeing as the groom's parents also gave them a downtown condo for a wedding present. Maybe it was one of those things where they thought people wouldn't get trashed? (hint: people got trashed. Really, really trashed.)

The 20k one was heavy on decor. They did drink tickets as opposed to straight up cash bar but still we did pay for quite a few drinks that night. 

Us: no decor beyond what's included (they had a package that included draping and basic centerpieces and linens, no chair covers though) but we will have a limited bar that will include a couple kegs, wine, champagne, and a couple signature drinks. Priorities! 

kitty8403

Maggie0829 said:

dbacksgirl said:

Maggie0829 said:

I went to $50K wedding once.  Even though we were hosted appropriately I really wasn't all that impressed.  I really couldn't tell the difference between the $50K wedding and the $20K wedding I had gone to the previous month.  And both weddings were located in the same city so that didn't play a factor at all.

I don't mean this in snarky way at all; I'm genuinely curious.  If you couldn't tell the difference, how do you know how much both weddings cost?  Outside of forums like this, do people generally talk  about how much their weddings cost in passing conversation? 

Because both weddings were for close friends who talked constantly about their budgets/wedding plans (and how much things were costing) so I was "lucky" to know the details.  The one was stressing about her small budget while the other almost seemed to brag about her larger budget.  In the end, both were pretty weddings but neither one stood out from the other.

But I agree typically people don't generally talk about money but for some reason when it comes to weddings I find that my friends tend to talk about money a lot.  Like they are excited because they got a great photographer for X when they thought it would cost Y, etc, etc.  I try to block it out because I really don't
want to know so much about their finances.

SIB!
Yeah I find people are pretty open with wedding money talk, at least to close friends. I have a very good idea of what a lot of people's weddings cost, based partly on things they shared and partly on rather obvious clues such as venue choice, city, decor, food and so forth.
FWIW, FI's mental "perfect wedding" cost the couple around $2500-3000, to my knowledge. Mine was around $20000-25000 or so. I'm looking to meet somewhere in the middle. We have been to events that clearly cost much more, but we didn't find the differences to be THAT impressive.