Rehearsal Dress

Butterscotch11

I'm kind of stumped on what to do for my rehearsal dress. Our wedding is a rustic theme and my dress is very simple. However, my FML booked a nice country club for the rehearsal dinner. (suit jacket and cocktail dresses required) She asked me if I was going to wear white and showed me the dress she chose to wear (very fancy). I did want to wear a white, but now I'm worried that whatever rehearsal dress I get is going to outshine my wedding gown. I don't want my FH to see me at the rehearsal and think "Wowza!" then get his first look of me as I walk down the isle and think "yawn". What should I do?

manateehugger

Butterscotch11 said:

I'm kind of stumped on what to do for my rehearsal dress. Our wedding is a rustic theme and my dress is very simple. However, my FML booked a nice country club for the rehearsal dinner. (suit jacket and cocktail dresses required) She asked me if I was going to wear white and showed me the dress she chose to wear (very fancy). I did want to wear a white, but now I'm worried that whatever rehearsal dress I get is going to outshine my wedding gown. I don't want my FH to see me at the rehearsal and think "Wowza!" then get his first look of me as I walk down the isle and think "yawn". What should I do?

Well unless you grab a full length white gown, I doubt the dress will outshine your wedding dress. I'm not assuming that you'd need an actual gown for this club. And nothing will trump you dressed as his bride on your wedding day for your FI, so stop worrying on that one.

You also could do a white dress with a colored pattern or something champagne/gold. Look for some fun cocktail dresses out there (throw us a budget and we can help shop) and wear whatever you want.

ETA: Just a guess, but FMIL sounds like she's not the rustic type and just wanted a chance to show off some finery for her son's wedding. I wouldn't feel too pressured by it.

kns1988

I don't think that could happen even if you wore a super fancy cocktail dress. I'd wear a knee length or shorter cocktail dress and call it a day. The one I'm wearing for my rehearsal dinner is white with red flowers on it. 

theartistformerlyknownas

I wouldn't worry about what FMIL wears. Choose something you like independent of what she's wearing. 

FWIW, I ordered this for mine. I kind of have the opposite sitch though - RD is in my FIL's backyard, but I wanted to dress up because I just normally prefer to look nice, and it's my RD and I'd want to wear a white dress for it no matter where it was. 

https://www.lulus.com/products/say-no-amore-ivory-floral-print-maxi-dress/140482.html

Maggie0829

Personally I don't get the point in wearing white to the rehearsal. Everyone knows you are the bride so wearing white just seems silly to me. As for your RD dress outshining your wedding dress, I am not sure how that could happen. Unless your wedding dress is a cotton sundress I am sure anything you buy will not outshine your wedding dress.

theartistformerlyknownas

Maggie0829 said:

Personally I don't get the point in wearing white to the rehearsal. Everyone knows you are the bride so wearing white just seems silly to me.

As for your RD dress outshining your wedding dress, I am not sure how that could happen. Unless your wedding dress is a cotton sundress I am sure anything you buy will not outshine your wedding dress.

Eh, I just kind of see it as being festive, not getting recognition as the bride. But I'm also the girl who still wears red or green around Christmas and pink on Valentine's Day. I had been planning on wearing aqua til I decided I just really wanted that white one.

ElcaB

Why don't you try wearing white with an accent color? My RD dress is kind of similar to these (both from NY&Co): 

Remember, you can also get an all-white dress and accessorize it with colorful jewelry, belts, etc. 

RebeccaFlower

Maggie0829 said:

Personally I don't get the point in wearing white to the rehearsal. Everyone knows you are the bride so wearing white just seems silly to me. As for your RD dress outshining your wedding dress, I am not sure how that could happen. Unless your wedding dress is a cotton sundress I am sure anything you buy will not outshine your wedding dress.

I couldn't agree more. I know a bride that wore different white dresses to her shower, bach party and rehearsal. Gag. I just don't understand the need to be a AW. 

AddieCake

I don't get the point of wearing white to rehearsals, showers, etc, either. 

Maggie0829

lolo883 said:

Personally I don't get the point in wearing white to the rehearsal. Everyone knows you are the bride so wearing white just seems silly to me. As for your RD dress outshining your wedding dress, I am not sure how that could happen. Unless your wedding dress is a cotton sundress I am sure anything you buy will not outshine your wedding dress.

Eh, I just kind of see it as being festive, not getting recognition as the bride. But I'm also the girl who still wears red or green around Christmas and pink on Valentine's Day. I had been planning on wearing aqua til I decided I just really wanted that white one.

See I don't think that most brides see it as being festive (and a wedding isn't a holiday).  I think it is them wanting to be an AW and present themselves as the bride.  People know that you are the bride, you don't need to wear white to remind people of this fact.  Same with showers and bach parties.  I get it, your getting married, but you certainly don't need to wear white every time to remind me.

theartistformerlyknownas

Maggie0829 said:

lolo883 said:

Personally I don't get the point in wearing white to the rehearsal. Everyone knows you are the bride so wearing white just seems silly to me. As for your RD dress outshining your wedding dress, I am not sure how that could happen. Unless your wedding dress is a cotton sundress I am sure anything you buy will not outshine your wedding dress.

Eh, I just kind of see it as being festive, not getting recognition as the bride. But I'm also the girl who still wears red or green around Christmas and pink on Valentine's Day. I had been planning on wearing aqua til I decided I just really wanted that white one.

See I don't think that most brides see it as being festive (and a wedding isn't a holiday).  I think it is them wanting to be an AW and present themselves as the bride.  People know that you are the bride, you don't need to wear white to remind people of this fact.  Same with showers and bach parties.  I get it, your getting married, but you certainly don't need to wear white every time to remind me.

Oh I'm sure you're right, that's just my own personal 2-cents on it.  

I hardly ever wear white, but the occasion (not holiday) of a wedding event gives me an excuse to wear it. On the other hand, I wear my "wedding color" all the time because it's my favorite.

RebeccaFlower

Another shitty Pinterest idea, I'm guessing. I feel like no one would think to wear white until it was all over Pinterest. 

VulgarGirl

lolo883 said:

Personally I don't get the point in wearing white to the rehearsal. Everyone knows you are the bride so wearing white just seems silly to me. As for your RD dress outshining your wedding dress, I am not sure how that could happen. Unless your wedding dress is a cotton sundress I am sure anything you buy will not outshine your wedding dress.

Eh, I just kind of see it as being festive, not getting recognition as the bride. But I'm also the girl who still wears red or green around Christmas and pink on Valentine's Day. I had been planning on wearing aqua til I decided I just really wanted that white one.

I do that too!!!! I have nothing else to add and I dunno what I'm wearing to my RD (white, green, red, I just promise clothing will be worn). I just wanted to say I do this too.

Butterscotch11

Soooo... I didn't expect to be getting a ton of flack for MY choice to wear white for the rehearsal dinner. Besides, my question on this wasn't about what color to wear, but for advice on the style of dress. And no, my MIL isn't just trying to make the rehearsal nice, in our case, she is a very controlling person and is trying to use a fancy dinner to force my FH into wearing his his military uniform which is not something he wants to do for this wedding.

My issue is that I don't want to look "hot" in a cocktail dress for the rehearsal, then turn into a matronly bride for the wedding since my dress is very understated. I was hoping for some direction on a modest cocktail dress that would still allow my wedding dress (and essentially me) shine on the big day.

Personally, I like it when brides wear white for the showers, bachelorette party, and rehearsal. I'm an event coordinator/planner and I love it when all aspects of the event carry the theme of the event. She IS the bride. Live it up. I've seen people celebrate their birth month rather than just their birthday, so why is extending the "bride-in-white" feeling so absurd? It might not be what you personally want to do, but you shouldn't knock women who want to wear white for these occasions. I am a very humble, in the background kind of person and don't usually wear white. This is the one time I get to step outside my box and see what it's like to be the guest of honor rather than the coordinator/planner. 

atlastmrsg

I wore a white cocktail dress by Mandalay to my engagement party, then a white BCBG dress to my rehearsal dinner.  I had a white Tony Bowls dress for the wedding after party.  Obviously, I loved shopping for white dresses--I figured it was the one time where I really could, so I enjoyed it 110%.  (In that order below)

  

If you want any of them, PM me.  We can work something out.

I say rock the white.  White's a hard color to wear otherwise, so use this as an excuse.    

msuprincess04

I had a white with blue embroidery details for my shower (not a new dress). Though I bought a purple dress, I got talked into wearing a short, ivory, halter neck cocktail dress to our welcome party. The girls went out for the bachelorette party afterwards. At the rehearsal, I wore a simple cobalt blue dress. And my wedding dress was boat neck, lace, and long. If you want to wear white, then go for it. I wouldn't worry about your FI being disappointed on your wedding day. Whether you are in a burlap sack or a balllgown, he'll be excited because it's your wedding day!