Wedding Party

Who to Ask Dilemma

Hello everyone! I've been lurking for awhile but thought I'd make an appearance to ask advice of the Board Vets. :) I'm not sure who to ask to be a part of my bridal party. I know who I want to ask to be my MOH, but I'm not sure for the others. For the record, I've not asked any person, not even the MOH to be in the wedding. I know I'll need to next month because I'll hit the 10 months to go milestone. 

I never envisioned having a large bridal party (4 people maybe?). I'm introverted and can be overwhelmed by people, even if it's with people I love and care about. I had four girls come to mind when I was initially thinking about the wedding. However ... my mother thinks my two sisters (whom I've never been terribly close with as 8+ years older than they are) should be in the wedding and I also have a male friend whom I'm closer to than two of the ladies that initially came to mind. Additionally, one of my female friends has offered to gift us our wedding cake, so I'm not sure if that puts her more "in the running" to be asked to be in the bridal party compared to others or not?  I don't want to disappoint anyone or hurt feelings by not seeming as inclusive as I could be because I care for them all greatly. 

I have been trying to think of ways to include all of them, but overall the process has made me stressed out and wanting to more and more to strictly limit my bridal party to my MOH and maybe my sister. Any advice? 

I apologize if any of this is rambly - please let me know if I could clarify anything.

Either way - thank you for taking the time to read! I appreciate it! 

Re: Who to Ask Dilemma

  • Hello everyone! I've been lurking for awhile but thought I'd make an appearance to ask advice of the Board Vets. :) I'm not sure who to ask to be a part of my bridal party. I know who I want to ask to be my MOH, but I'm not sure for the others. For the record, I've not asked any person, not even the MOH to be in the wedding. I know I'll need to next month because I'll hit the 10 months to go milestone. 

    I never envisioned having a large bridal party (4 people maybe?). I'm introverted and can be overwhelmed by people, even if it's with people I love and care about. I had four girls come to mind when I was initially thinking about the wedding. However ... my mother thinks my two sisters (whom I've never been terribly close with as 8+ years older than they are) should be in the wedding and I also have a male friend whom I'm closer to than two of the ladies that initially came to mind. Additionally, one of my female friends has offered to gift us our wedding cake, so I'm not sure if that puts her more "in the running" to be asked to be in the bridal party compared to others or not?  I don't want to disappoint anyone or hurt feelings by not seeming as inclusive as I could be because I care for them all greatly. 

    I have been trying to think of ways to include all of them, but overall the process has made me stressed out and wanting to more and more to strictly limit my bridal party to my MOH and maybe my sister. Any advice? 

    I apologize if any of this is rambly - please let me know if I could clarify anything.

    Either way - thank you for taking the time to read! I appreciate it! 
    To the bolded: Well, then you already have your answer. Your wedding party should be those that you can't imagine getting married without. You are under no obligation to include your sisters, other people you aren't close with, or people who give you things. It isn't a contest.
  • Thank you for your response, ashley8918. :) I appreciate the feedback.
  • Your wedding party should be made up of your nearest and dearest, not by anybody you are not close to.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • I'm not saying who you should or shouldn't include in your wedding, but a little something to think about.  Family is forever and friendships sometimes do end.  

    Different people have told me that they wished they'd had family members in their weddings instead of their friends, because even if they weren't really close at the time, they ended up getting much closer to them later in life.  And some of the friends they chose to have in the wedding they were no longer close with.  

    Just something to think about.
  • Ask the people you are closest to and that's it. Ignore all the other factors (like the wedding cake).

    1) your mother has no say in your WP - like zero, none at all
    2) you can have uneven sides, so no need to try to match the # of GMs
    3) you can have men or women stand up for you - gender is not important

    Do not ask your sisters if you aren't close to them. Do not ask the wedding cake lady if you weren't originally considering her. Lots of people will help with your wedding and you can't (well... you could...?) have 50 BMs. Just ask your nearest and dearest.
    *********************************************************************************

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