Possible change of plans?

mrsmorales2be

So...FI and I have been discussing things and we've come to a decision. We are tired of wedding planning. We don't want a big wedding, we just want to get married in the Church. We don't want to wait until December. In fact, we're thinking about even getting married before his fall semester begins. We're excited about this idea, but our families aren't going to take this well - they're expecting a PPD with lots of family, not a small, private ceremony. Any suggestions on how to break this news to our families?

AddieCake

I would just sit down with your respective parents and tell them how you truly feel. 

SBmini

I would prepare a pros/cons list to your plans and all your reasons for wanting it. Start with your reasons for wanting it and all the benefits. If they start bringing up the cons you can address them. I would be respectful but make it clear that it is your wedding day and you want it to be what you want. And as it stands, what is planned isn't what you guys want. 

emmyg65

I don't actually think you should spend a lot of time explaining yourself. You don't need to! You're an adult and can make your own decisions! "FI and I have decided that we're going to get married in a small, private ceremony later this summer. I know you were looking forward to a bigger wedding, but this is what's right for us. I hope you can understand."

jnrsgirl

I agree with @emmyg65‌. You dont need to explain yourself. You are adults and can make your own decisions about the wedding you want. This is what FI and I will be doing. If we were to include just family and a handful of friends our guestlist would be well over 200. Frankly we both just want a simple ceremony with our neareat and dearest. Not everyone likes a giant affair; sometimes simplicity is best. :-)

jenna8984

As someone who just did this and canceled her big wedding a few weeks ago, I applaud you for actually following your heart and not just going along with the motions. My parents took it very well and just said "OK, it's your wedding, you can have it any way you want". FI's parents were a little more upset and kept pressing the issue that we HAD to have all these people there and it meant so much to them. We literally just shut them down at every chance and stood our ground. FMIL thought she could whine and badger us so much that we'd change our minds and we just kept saying firmly "not happeneding no matter what". She got over it and so will your family. You don't need any explanation or justification and any extended family who expects that are the ones being rude, not you.

mrsmorales2be

And now I'm freaking out because I've been in my current position since 2003.  I need to start looking for work in TX, and that means an updated resume'.  It's been so long since I've done one, it's intimidating!  Guess I better get busy! 

CMGragain

You should send out wedding announcements as soon as you are married to friends and relatives.  This does NOT mean that they should send you a gift.  It is simply a formal way of telling them that you are married.

Bride's Full Name
and
Groom's Full Name
announce their marriage
Date
City, State

No other information should be included with this.

jenna8984

mrsmorales2be said:

And now I'm freaking out because I've been in my current position since 2003.  I need to start looking for work in TX, and that means an updated resume'.  It's been so long since I've done one, it's intimidating!  Guess I better get busy! 

We did extensive resume training in business college. I have worked on basically all of my friends' resumes to spruce them up and have been told my many interviewers that they were impressed by mine. If you want to email it to me, I'd be more than happy to look it over and make tweaks or help you with wording. I'm a geek, I enjoy doing stuff like that in my free time lol