I have lurked the heck outta this board and have learned A LOT. This is my Public Service Announcement to all brides planning their special day: no matter how much your friends and family love you, they WILL judge your rudeness.
Story: One of my very good friends is getting married in a couple weeks. It's wedding #2 for both of them, so they wanted to do something very non-traditional and low-key. Awesome. They're just doing a quick ceremony and reception all in the same banquet room at a restaurant. Dinner and drinks, no dancing or anything. Pretty much all summer I have been looking forward to this wedding...and then this:
#1: Just found out a bunch of people were B-Listed. I wasn't one of them, but still...it makes me feel uncomfortable. And these people sure know since their invites were hand-delivered a week ago.
#2: Apparently we all get one glass of wine with our dinner and then any additional beverages (even soda) are at our expense.
#3: There will be a donation jar for their honeymoon.
This is one of my best friends. I love her and am beyond happy for her. But all these things still put a bad taste in my mouth and I have tried to steer her around these things to no avail. I know this girl and her situation very well. She and her fiance don't have the money for a honeymoon and are very disappointed. But all I can think is that if they had chosen a cheaper venue, invited fewer people, scaled down on the extravagant menu, etc. they could afford to host our beverages (even if that just means soda and tea) and maybe they could have some kind of honeymoon. I was planning on giving her cash anyway since I know that's what they would prefer, but now that there is a donation jar, it makes me not want to give them anything!
So please keep in mind ladies, that your loved ones will not be pleased with bad etiquette even if they don't say so to your face. I am still going to this wedding and will be there for my friend, but to be honest I'm not looking forward to it nearly as much as I was before.