Month of Wedding Stress

DanikaMarie0227

My wedding is pretty far away - September 2015 - and I feel like I've got a lot of the big stuff done. We have a venue, I have a dress, we have a DJ, and we are booking our photographer next weekend. People keep telling me - it flies by and a couple months before the wedding you're going to have SO much to do & be SO stressed out (umm, thanks for giving me something to look forward to guys!) 

My question is - is this true? What exactly is all this stuff that is going to make me crazy the month or so before the wedding? Maybe if you tell me now I can prepare myself and avoid having an anxiety-ridden meltdown next year. FYI - I already know I have to move 2 months before my wedding which is stressful enough in itself.

sarawifenow

I am about 2 1/2 months out. I am not stressed so much as really impatient. I am just over wedding planning and want to be married already!

holyguacamole79

Our engagement was 8 months long.  There was a surge at the beginning to get the venues, dress, and a lot of the major stuff done.  The month before the wedding, we were a little stressed because we had DIY centerpieces and we had to rush to finish our marriage prep (there was a mixup at the church, so we kinda crammed things).  Once RSVPs start coming in, it picked up a bit. 

I'm one of those brides that wasn't all that stressed during the prep.  Yeah, a few things came up here & there, but it wasn't as horrific as everyone makes it sound.  But then again, I had a venue that does weddings a LOT and knew their stuff (and included almost everything).

huskypuppy14

I bought a house 2 weeks before my wedding, so I was more concerned with that then the wedding.

Honestly, I had almost no DIY stuff, so it was pretty non stressful.

littlemushroom

I got engaged October 12 last year.  I had all the major things (venue, caterer, photographer, cake, DJ) booked by the end November, and all the other big things (my dress, veil, bridesmaid dresses, tuxes, etc) done by the end of January.  My wedding is in 3 weeks.  From about a month and a half out, I have finished or realized I needed/will need to finish:

*Writing the ceremony and sending it to the officiant

*Get marriage license

*Schedule my hair and makeup trial, have the trial, and figure out timeline for hair and makeup to tell the moms and bridal party for the day of (I am paying for everyone's hair and makeup)

*Figure out what had to go in a program, format a program, print the program, and assemble the program (DIY printable fans for my outdoor ceremony)

*Choose songs for mothers seating, processional, recessional, sand ceremony, introductions at the reception, cake cutting, anniversary dance song, and final song of the reception as well as figure out what songs the DJ already had and download the ones he didn't

*Finish DIY bouquets and centerpieces and corsages

*Finish assembling favors

*Print escort cards

*Figure out table assignments/seating for the reception

*Schedule final meeting with bakery to finalize cake

*Final meeting with venue to finalize timeline, total numbers, and hand over all the decorations for them to set up (ceremony and reception is at the same place)

*Get a timeline and list of pictures we want to the photographer

*Chase down the people who don't RSVP

*Final dress fitting

*Had a bridal shower and then had to get out Thank You notes

Most of these things can't be completed early.  Some of them I didn't even realize were things that needed to be done (all those songs?! seriously?!).  And some of them I knew about since we got engaged, but felt like there was time to do it later.  It is now later and they have to get done.  

I think the stress is more from thinking I am forgetting more things I need to do, or what if I forget some of them and don't remember until the last minute?  It's just a lot of nervous energy for that final push to decide all the tiny details and communicate them to the people who need to know.

mschristie123

Honestly, It makes me anxious even thinking about the mindless shit and minutia that invaded my life the month leading up to the wedding. There are are endless details, even when you think you have everything set. You send an email, check that off your list, and then add 3 more things to your to do list after receiving a response back to your email.

One of the worst times for me was around 3 weeks out. We were trying to finalize our numbers so that we could give final numbers for catering, chairs, table assignments, seating plan, and flowers/centerpieces. None of that could be decided until everyone RSVPd (and we had some stragglers and folks change their minds at the last minute). Gah.

Although it was a stressful time, I kept a comprehensive to do list of every last thing I needed to do. It REALLY helped with the "omg I think I'm forgetting something important" thing.

penguin44

mschristie123 said:

Honestly, It makes me anxious even thinking about the mindless shit and minutia that invaded my life the month leading up to the wedding. There are are endless details, even when you think you have everything set. You send an email, check that off your list, and then add 3 more things to your to do list after receiving a response back to your email.

One of the worst times for me was around 3 weeks out. We were trying to finalize our numbers so that we could give final numbers for catering, chairs, table assignments, seating plan, and flowers/centerpieces. None of that could be decided until everyone RSVPd (and we had some stragglers and folks change their minds at the last minute). Gah.

Although it was a stressful time, I kept a comprehensive to do list of every last thing I needed to do. It REALLY helped with the "omg I think I'm forgetting something important" thing.

Yep. I kept thinking I was done with things, and then a vendor would ask me more questions! I had a list of things that I thought would be quick. They weren't quick.

My mom decided to come up the week of the wedding, so I put off some things for when she got here. Not a good plan. We did SO much the 3 days before my wedding. Good thing my DH's family was here to "help." Oh wait, everyone expected me to entertain them! 

So yeah, it was a bit stressful. And it snuck up on me. I had a 1-yr engagement. We did a lot right at the beginning. Then, took a break for holidays and such. Got back on track at the 5 month mark. I ended up doing a bunch in the last month. 

Centerpieces, programs, buying all of the alcohol, soda, mixers, seating chart, final vendor meetings... 

All of the vendors wanted to meet the week before/ week of the wedding. And we closed on our house two weeks before the wedding. It was a bit stressful. Lists helped a lot. 

goldchocobo.defunct635829490514903826

I am three months out, OP.  Like you, I had all of the major stuff done pretty early.  I feel like I am playing the waiting game to pay vendors and get stuff done!

- I need a dress fitting, gotta wait.

- I need a marriage license, gotta wait.

- I need to get the centerpiece essentials to the florist, gotta emm-effing wait.

- Seating charts, gotta wait.

- bridesmaids dresses aren't in yet, RSVP's are waaay too early to tally

- wait wait wait wait wait!!!!!

It's driving me nuts.  I am ready to throw this wedding and everyone else isn't (understandably).

Work will keep me distracted pretty much all of the month of August so that will help.  August will vanish before I can blink twice.

So looking forward to the wedding.  I'm not stressed, just super excited!  

DanikaMarie0227

Oh boy! I'm stressed just reading this. I'm going to lie to myself and pretend it won't be stressful (rainbows & butterflies, rainbows & butterflies) and deal with the inevitable anxiety next year. *sigh* In the meantime, when I think about the fact that I'm REALLY planning my wedding I get super nervous & excited all at once

chouette61

I'm getting married in 15 days.(In 10 minutes it will be 14 days). I also had all the big stuff done very soon after I was engaged. Now. I am working on seating charts. The only super stressful thing for me has been the rsvps and seating chart. We are under our minimum, and now people are changing their rsvps. A yes has changed to a no on more than one occasion. But that is the only stress I am really feeling. My dress is too tight, and my boobs are touching my chin when I look down but dress is at dressmaker getting fixed. So. That isn't worrying me. Just the damn rsvps!!!