The Gemstone Debate

LabLove86

Hello all -

So, since my lil breakdown a few weeks ago when BF and I decided to change our timeline and will be looking at E-rings this fall/winter, and since BF told me to start doing some research to figure out what I would like (Oh please, twist my arm . . . .).

I know one thing - I am not interested in a white diamond as a center stone. I would like some diamond detail on the setting or something . . . I think. 

The 2 biggest ones I've been researching so far are black diamonds, which I think are beautiful. But the more I read about Moissanite the more and more I like what I read.

Thoughts/comments/tips/advice???

missdelilah

It depends what stones you like. We've bought a few things from Brilliant Earth and they always seem to have a number of designs available with alternatives to white diamonds. I haven't seen any black diamonds there though. My advice is to go in to some stores and have a look at different stones, and see how the colors work with your skin tone and personal style. After that, it's not too difficult to have a custom ring made if that's within your budget.

ShesSoCold

missdelilah said:

It depends what stones you like. We've bought a few things from Brilliant Earth and they always seem to have a number of designs available with alternatives to white diamonds. I haven't seen any black diamonds there though. My advice is to go in to some stores and have a look at different stones, and see how the colors work with your skin tone and personal style. After that, it's not too difficult to have a custom ring made if that's within your budget.

This. It really depends on what you like. Like blue? Look at sapphires and aquamarine. Hate red? Rule out rubies. 

I agree with going to stores and seeing what you like. Research durability and softness of stones you like. 

And PP is SO right that it's not crazy ridiculous to have a ring made. FI and I found a stone and he got the ring made. He won't tell me what he paid, but I know it wasn't astronomical. 

luckya23

Not that I want them to become popular, but I have a blue diamond that I love ;-) It's in a white diamond halo.

I've been obsessed with blue diamonds for a few years though.  They come in a range of shades - mine is a dark greenish teal.

 

CMGragain

If you are on a budget, a sapphire is a good choice.  It is a durable, natural stone.  I know Princess Kate loves hers.

missdelilah

CMGragain said:

If you are on a budget, a sapphire is a good choice.  It is a durable, natural stone.  I know Princess Kate loves hers.

Sapphires also come in a range of colors, so you should hopefully find something you like.

kaitlynmichelle

My main stone is a diamond but we wanted some colour in my ring. We went with deep blue sapphires for the side stones. They were much less expensive than diamonds as well.
Make sure you consider the strength and durability of different gemstones. If you are hard on your hands, pick something stronger like a sapphire.

artbyallie

I have a lab-created sapphire, so it's flawless for a fraction of the price of a natural stone but has all of the good qualities (durability, namely) of one. Rubies/sapphires and diamond are what you should stick with for a ring worn every day like an engagement ring. Moissanite is also hard enough and is a man-made stone, but if you don't want a white diamond I don't understand why you would want moissanite unless it's for the price difference.

I love colored diamonds. Blacks are actually less expensive than white, though most other colors are going to be pricier. Yellow, brown, blue, green, red, and pink are all options, though that last is particularly rare.

As mentioned, sapphires also come in a range: red, though technically we call those rubies, blue, yellow, orange, green, purple, black, pink.

I wouldn't personally choose any stone softer than those for a ring that gets that much wear just for ease of maintenance. Other stones may have to be unmounted and reset for repair other than sizing. With these durable stones, jewelers can even tip prongs (replace gold that has been worn away) while they're still in place in the ring.

ShannonLeigh1979

Mine is a blue diamond with white diamond accents.

southernbelle0915

My favorite non-white diamond e-rings are sapphires. I'm not really a fan of the halo in general, which is really popular with sapphire rings (no one hate me, I realize it's popular right now). I like looks like this:

theartistformerlyknownas

My step sister has an antique black diamond and LOVES it.

ohmrs2014

I love sapphire.  I myself have a diamond engagement ring, but DH knows that I want a diamond and sapphire band to stack with my wedding set.

levioosa

My best friend got a gorgeous sapphire engagement ring. I've also seen some really pretty peach diamonds, although I'm not altogether sure I would want that for every day.

LabLove86

Thanks for all of the suggestions guys! I've clearly got some research to do!!

@artbyallie - I wish I could tell you why I don't want a white diamond but would be OK with a Moissanite. The cost of the Moissanite IS really appealing. But I just don't want a white diamond. I can't even explain it.

Kinda like I don't like mushrooms. I just don't. Its not texture because I love olives. Oh well.

bunnyprincess2014

CMGragain said:

If you are on a budget, a sapphire is a good choice.  It is a durable, natural stone.  I know Princess Kate loves hers.

My coworker has a sapphire and it is gorgeous!

jenna8984

I have this ring of black & white diamonds but I actually don't wear it because it was a gift from an ex (that I picked out) and now that I have my engagement ring from FI, I just have no use for the other one. But I really loved the black diamonds.

My mom has a ring that I adore, it's got one white pearl and one black pearl.

ETA- holy crap the picture wasn't loading so I kept clicking on upload and it was not showing up so now there's 5 of them and I can't figure out how to delete them hahah

 

Bubblegum5586

I have a sapphire with white diamonds on the sides and I love it! 

jimandpam87

I chose a sapphire center stone and white diamonds surrounding it, as well as on the band part.  I still love it, even though I had people telling me that "no one would know it's an engagement ring".  I'm pretty sure having it on my left hand makes it an engagement ring.  I'm like you, I just didn't really want a white diamond center stone...not really sure why.  Part of it could have been that I wanted a halo setting, and the regular diamond just didn't stand out as much to me.  My sapphire is beautiful, and as a perk it ended up being much more in FI's price range.  I love it and I definitely don't regret going with something a little different!

jimandpam87

Forgot to mention, I get compliments ALL. THE. TIME. on my ring.  I like to point that out to all those who were naysayers

jdluvr06

I have an antique emerald ring and I love it. Green is one of my favorite colors and the stone is pretty flawless. FI said he looked at a sapphire ring first but then remembered that I hate blue so passed on it. He knew I wouldn't want a white diamond though. I have a couple of black diamond rings and I love them. I might be biased but I think they are a bit prettier than white diamonds.

rajahmd

I have an opal ring. The center stone is flanked by two halves of a celtic knot with 10 tiny side diamonds going down each side in rows of 2. The opal gives the ring lots of color (which changes depending on the lighting) and the diamonds give it sparkle.

Opal is a softer stone, but the research I've read is that it's still decently hard enough to wear on a daily basis, in the right setting. I probably take it off more than most people, but that's because I don't like to wear jewelry in the shower or while cleaning. Opals also come in a variety of background colors- black opals are my favorite (mine is white).

CMGragain

I would never recommend an opal ring for daily wear.  I have an impressive collection of opal jewelry.  Opals and pearls should be treated as if they were fragile glass.  Opals are not just "soft".  The crystal structure of opals is chemically arranged to make them fracture prone. I saw so many missing opal stones when I worked in jewelry.

Inkdancer

My fiance had my sapphire and silver ring custom made for me. Sapphires are next in hardness to diamonds so they are very hard to damage, and the e-ring and wedding band together cost us under $200.

falsara

My ring is custom made with a twisted double shank and a past, present, future setting.  I have a diamond in the center and then a garnet (his birthstone) on one side.  He wanted to put my birthstone (emerald) on the other side, but it gets very brittle when worn a lot, so he put jade in it instead.  Jade comes in lots of different shades and unless you knew it was jade instead of emerald you wouldn't be able to tell the difference.

I'll see if I can find a picture on my computer.

ETA: Found one, sorry the lighting is suckish and I need to clean my ring.

artbyallie

CMGragain said:

I would never recommend an opal ring for daily wear.  I have an impressive collection of opal jewelry.  Opals and pearls should be treated as if they were fragile glass.  Opals are not just "soft".  The crystal structure of opals is chemically arranged to make them fracture prone. I saw so many missing opal stones when I worked in jewelry.

Seconding this. Opals actually need oiling every year or two because they contain oil naturally and dry out over time. They're also a 5.5-6.5 on the Mohs scale, softer than quartz and are much safer in necklace or earring settings than in a ring or bracelet since those tend to get much more knocking around. And if the jewelry needs any kind of repair work that involves soldering, the opal will need to be taken out and reset, and every time that's done there's a chance for breakage.

@Lablove86 for Moissanites, have you seen many in person in comparison to diamonds? I work in jewelry, so I see lots and lots of diamonds and relatively very very few moissanite, but the handful I have seen did not compare that favorably IMO. They tend to have more visible 'color' (like maybe a J-K on the diamond color scale) and are doubly refractive rather than single, which muddies the sparkle a bit. Corundum (ruby/sapphire) is actually doubly refractive as well and as much as I love the stones I do notice they don't sparkle quite as well as diamond.

Not that I'm saying there's anything wrong with preferring moissanite, of course. I just feel it's bound to be taken for granted as a diamond and I personally like being so noticably different in my choice of e-ring.

And hey, when you pick one out show us!!! We love ring porn!

Sällskapdjur

OMG I had no idea about the fragility of opals. They're so pretty, it's a shame they're too soft for daily wear. 

thisismynickname2

I have a blue sapphire with white diamond halo. Love!!

vulpiepop

My main stone is a ruby. I love it because it's durable (I'm pretty rough on my jewelry) and it's my birthstone. FI put a lot of thought into it when he picked it out.

It really depends on you though and what you like. What colors do you like? Are you rough on your jewelry? How rough? Maybe your job has you working with you hands a lot, you don't want a bulky ring if that's the case.

CMGragain

Rubies are durable and beautiful, but good ones cost more than diamonds!

Cookie Pusher

I love rubies and have quite a few ruby pieces myself. Just be careful when buying them. There was a big thing on the news that many places are selling leaded glass but calling them natural rubies, and the jewelry was getting ruined because the glass was not as durable as real rubies.

artbyallie

Cookie Pusher said:

I love rubies and have quite a few ruby pieces myself. Just be careful when buying them. There was a big thing on the news that many places are selling leaded glass but calling them natural rubies, and the jewelry was getting ruined because the glass was not as durable as real rubies.

Yes. If the price seems too good to be true, it probably is. And really, that goes for all fine jewelry, whatever the stone.