Moms and Maids

Not being friends after the wedding.....

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Re: Not being friends after the wedding.....

  • I dropped out of a bridal party once and didn't even attend the wedding because of the weird thought that bridesmaids should be there to be little helpers throughout the entire process. 

    First they asked me to get the dress. I did. Then they told me their bridal shower was in a state half way across the country and that as a bridesmaid I had to attend. I argued a bit but eventually took a trip that lasted five days... five days... for this shower. Then they told me I had to attend ANOTHER shower in our home state. I said I couldn't. They argued with me that I needed to 'make some sacrifices' if I expected to be a bridesmaid.

    Now this is way more extreme than your own story, but I'm sharing it because I think when you ask someone to be in your bridal party, you put them in a TOUGH spot. They can't predict what their life is going to be like, they can't predict what you are going to ask of them. You ask, they feel honored, they say yes... and start praying to God that all the have to do is buy the dress and show up. 

    Also, with the make up thing, I had almost no money when my friend asked me to be in her bridal party, but she invited me to her house and had a surprise make-up lady come and put make-up on us and then we were supposed to buy the make-up. I sat there feeling deeply awkward because they wanted me to buy something I couldn't afford and likely wouldn't wear again.

    If you feel like you wouldn't be friends with someone after having them in your bridal party, either a change of expectations needs to happen, or you need to find other women, because they are going to be in your wedding photos forever. 
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