Can we have your leftovers?

paulandjason27

My partner and I are getting married at the end of September--we are not overly romantic people, and we thought it would be funny (not to mention cost-effective) to have napkins and whatnot with other people's names on them.  So if you've got unused stuff leftover from your wedding ("For Esmerelda and Peyton's Happy Day!") and you'd be willing to part with it, we'd be very much obliged!  (We will of course pay for the shipping!)  

Edit:  For the record, I'm not really asking whether or not you like this idea, because we don't know each other and I don't really care.  If you don't like my idea, I advise you not to take part in it.  The manners of some people...  Nasty commenters will be ignored and reported.

manateehugger

paulandjason27 said:

My partner and I are getting married at the end of September--we are not overly romantic people, and we thought it would be funny (not to mention cost-effective) to have napkins and whatnot with other people's names on them.  So if you've got unused stuff leftover from your wedding ("For Esmerelda and Peyton's Happy Day!") and you'd be willing to part with it, we'd be very much obliged!  (We will of course pay for the shipping!)  

AddieCake

I'm not sure guests would see that as funny.

holyguacamole79

Seriously?

ohannabelle

My best friend and I used to do this on our birthdays every year- hers is a couple of days after mine. We'd cross my name off cards and fill hers in and have leftover cake and decorate with half deflated balloons. We thought it was hilarious. 

I would laugh if I saw this. Not everyone would, and for a lot of people it would be a giant WTF. But honestly, it would crack me up.

MuppetOverlord

I would think you were cheap and I would talk about that.

kirby400

I think it's really funny

theartistformerlyknownas

MuppetOverlord said:

I would think you were cheap and I would talk about that.

Ditto. Sorry.

hteverywhere15

True story...I went to a wedding once where they had drink stirrers and napkins from a random couple's 1970's wedding (completely different names). No clue where they found the stuff. Some people thought it was funny, others were thoroughly confused. It was a pretty tacky wedding so this seemed to fit the vibe.

Fairyjen1

    I would find it funny! We both come from family's of jokers though. We are having immediate family (mostly) at our wedding so I could totally do this and everyone would get it. Most of MY extended family would too. I'm not as sure about each of our friends and FI's extended family so if it were a larger wedding I probably wouldn't risk it. A lot of people feel a wedding and most things tied to it should only be classy and serious. Which is fine, everyone is entitled to their feelings. I think it's a know your crowd thing.

    Then again, we are having a Jessica and Roger rabbit cake topper (wedding is at Disneyland) so maybe I'm not the best person to ask.

*Edited because my crowd isn't a bunch of crows!*

holyguacamole79

Does anyone else here watch the League?  Pee bibs, people.  Cocktail napkins from weddings are pee bibs.

lotsosandwiches

I think this is really funny and if we were doing personalized napkins, I would definitely send them your way. Good luck!

paulandjason27

Thank you to the people who left positive comments!

To the rest, thankfully we're not inviting anyone as shallow as you, and our guests have a sense of humor.  Thanks for your unsolicited opinion though!

holyguacamole79

paulandjason27 said:

Thank you to the people who left positive comments!

To the rest, thankfully we're not inviting anyone as shallow as you, and our guests have a sense of humor.  Thanks for your unsolicited opinion though!

You posted on a wedding forum. Unsolicited opinions are inevitable.


Btw, I have a great sense of humor. Watch the League. It's on Netflix. One of the characters uses leftover wedding napkins as a pee bib. Fucking hilarious. Your idea just makes you look cheap.

paulandjason27

And if I were shallow enough to care about whether or not I looked cheap, and if my loved ones were rude enough to care, we might have a problem.  Internet or not, you have no manners.

Maggie0829

paulandjason27 said:

And if I were shallow enough to care about whether or not I looked cheap, and if my loved ones were rude enough to care, we might have a problem.  Internet or not, you have no manners.

PP have no manners because they gave you their opinions? Seriously? 

Here is my opinion. I don't find your idea cute or funny or unique or whatever the hell you are aiming for. I would be confused and wondering if your napkin order got screwed up.

ETA:  You posted on a public forum.  You don't have any control what answers you get.  People are free to respond however they wish, including giving you unsolicited advice and/or their opinions on the matter.  This does not make them rude or have no manners.  If you don't like certain posts feel free to ignore them but no one was rude.

paulandjason27

1. Remember the human: Malicious behavior is not acceptable here.

When you communicate online, all you see is a computer screen – you are anonymously conversing with others behind a screen. This does not give you the right to maliciously criticize or attack others. Remember – there is a human on the other side of that screen. Adhere to the same standards of behavior online that you follow in real life. The Knot encourages you to share your opinions while respecting others' thoughts and feelings as well. Feel free to share, but be ready to hear and accept other opinions that you may not always agree with. Because you do not agree with someone, does not mean this is the place to attack anyone else's beliefs.

Personal attacks are unacceptable. These posts include, but are not limited to: starting a thread with a user's name as the topic/title to "bash" them, linking to a thread to call out a user on their post, thoughts or beliefs (not a topic), calling a username out maliciously, starting a malicious or derogatory poll/question about a user, using images (memes, gifs, etc.) in a direct attack/vicious manner, etc. If you're thinking of using a specific term such as a racial or derogatory insult, think again about why that's a bad idea, and don't do it.

Not sure what would qualify as unacceptable? Make sure you can answer NO to these questions about your post:

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holyguacamole79

Hahahaha. Seriously, what do you think was "inflammatory"?

paulandjason27 said:

And if I were shallow enough to care about whether or not I looked cheap, and if my loved ones were rude enough to care, we might have a problem.  Internet or not, you have no manners.

Btw, I hate to break it to you, but it is not rude to care nor to think that something is tacky.

manateehugger

Disagreeing with you and saying "your plan sounds tacky" isn't malicious. Dealing with people disagreeing with you is human interaction.

But please, by all means, keep posting the TOS many of us have debated and helped create in the past. 

paulandjason27

I would think calling me cheap when no one asked you is rude. I would never criticize a stranger's wedding unless my opinions had been specifically asked for.  Our entire wedding would be called tacky by most people.  Those people have not been invited.  

holyguacamole79

paulandjason27 said:

I would think calling me cheap when no one asked you is rude. I would never criticize a stranger's wedding unless my opinions had been specifically asked for.  Our entire wedding would be called tacky by most people.  Those people have not been invited.  

That's not how it works here. And please tell us the rest of your tacky ideas. I need some entertainment.

manateehugger

paulandjason27 said:

I would think calling me cheap when no one asked you is rude. I would never criticize a stranger's wedding unless my opinions had been specifically asked for.  Our entire wedding would be called tacky by most people.  Those people have not been invited.  

Ok, look, you posted an idea on a public forum. People said, in various ways, that they think your idea is a poor one. If you don't want those comments, don't post or simply ignore them. If you want, post and say, "Yes, I know some people will think it's tacky. But our invite list is full of our friends who have our sense of humor. Besides, we still plan to host everyone properly."

You can't control how people post; you can control how tactfully you respond to those posts. If you think a post is rude to you, tactfully reply, and usually the person will usually roll their eyes and move along. Saying you have a bad idea, however, isn't rude. 

I hope you mean tacky as in off the wall ideas and not tacky as in treating guests poorly. 

paulandjason27

Nope.  Congrats.  This was my first post here, and now my last.  I have no interest in conversing with nasty people with nothing better to do than troll wedding websites--years after getting married--to put down strangers because they have different tastes.  You win, I'm gone.  Give yourselves a nice pat on the back.

Maggie0829

paulandjason27 said:

Nope.  Congrats.  This was my first post here, and now my last.  I have no interest in conversing with nasty people with nothing better to do than troll wedding websites--years after getting married--to put down strangers because they have different tastes.  You win, I'm gone.  Give yourselves a nice pat on the back.

manateehugger

paulandjason27 said:

Nope.  Congrats.  This was my first post here, and now my last.  I have no interest in conversing with nasty people with nothing better to do than troll wedding websites--years after getting married--to put down strangers because they have different tastes.  You win, I'm gone.  Give yourselves a nice pat on the back.

Make sure when you get pregnant, you only ask your never been pregnant friends for advise on the birthing process and handling a newborn. Because that makes about as much since as getting wedding planning advice from another bride who has been engaged for a month and never planned a wedding.

And seriously, yes, I personally think your idea is tacky. But I'm not your guest. And as you can see, a couple people agreed with you. Ignore the opinions you don't like and move along. 

In the long run, if you treat people right, you can ignore other comments. 

ETA: I got married less than two months ago, but I enjoy the community here and I enjoy passing along the advice I received when planning my wedding. 

holyguacamole79

paulandjason27 said:

Nope.  Congrats.  This was my first post here, and now my last.  I have no interest in conversing with nasty people with nothing better to do than troll wedding websites--years after getting married--to put down strangers because they have different tastes.  You win, I'm gone.  Give yourselves a nice pat on the back.

Here's what I learned from this site. We are Internet strangers. If you decide to have random napkins donated from strangers at your wedding, it doesn't affect us. We'll never know if you did it or not. And, you're posting to a very diverse demographic here. Chances are, if several people tell you that this idea is tacky, some of the guests at your wedding will think so, too. They just won't tell you.

And, think about it from a practical perspective. You are willing to spend money to have people ship you leftover napkins. Shipping isn't always cheap. You're essentially spending money on something that people will use to wipe their mouth then throw away. Take that money and put it to better use.

Personalized napkins, IMO, are just a huge waste of money. And having strangers' leftovers just looks like you're not able to properly host your guests.

southernbelle0915

ohannabelle

Hell, I cracked up. But not everybody shares my sense of humor, and that doesn't make them rude, or shallow. It means that they think different things are funny. 

Honestly, if I saw this, It would never make me think that the couple was cheap. I would think they were making a tongue in cheek joke about the whole personalized napkin and matchbook monogrammed burlap ridiculous wedding industry, and saying, hey, this is not the stuff that matters to us. We think this stuff is silly. And I would laugh.

Obviously, a lot of people (and probably even some of my own relatives) wouldn't get it. Or maybe they'd get it, but not think it's funny.

People are honest here. And you got honest feedback. It might even be valuable. You might say, okay, this is a funny idea that cracked us up last night, but let's not confuse or freak out 70% of our guests.

But don't get all pissy and stomp off because people don't think you're funny. That's not right. 

Lots of people don't think this horse is funny. I do. Funniest shit I've seen in a year. He cracks me up every damn time I see him. My own mother kind of looked at it, and while I was laughing, said, Annabelle, honey, are you smoking weed? She's not shallow, and she has a good sense of humor. She just didn't get that this is the best horse ever. 

ohannabelle

paulandjason27 said:

My partner and I are getting married at the end of September--we are not overly romantic people, and we thought it would be funny (not to mention cost-effective) to have napkins and whatnot with other people's names on them.  So if you've got unused stuff leftover from your wedding ("For Esmerelda and Peyton's Happy Day!") and you'd be willing to part with it, we'd be very much obliged!  (We will of course pay for the shipping!)  

Edit:  For the record, I'm not really asking whether or not you like this idea, because we don't know each other and I don't really care.  If you don't like my idea, I advise you not to take part in it.  The manners of some people...  Nasty commenters will be ignored and reported.

And this, FFS, is ridiculous. You don't report people for disagreeing with you, or giving honest opinions. That's just absurd. 

misshart00

Wow. You thought these comments were harsh? The internet is not for you.

AddieCake

I wish when people quoted the TOS they were wise enough to actually be right that the TOS was being violated. But it has yet to happen. Seriously, folks. If you're going to wave the TOS at other posters, make sure you know what it means and that it has actually been violated, or you just make a fool of yourself.