Adult Flower Girls?

ashley8918

geekykitties said:

My sweet little nieces are actually adults. By the time my wedding date rolls around they will be 25, 23, and 19 years old. But I really want them to be my flower girls... flower ladies... pedal petal attendants. The girls are actually excited and want to be pedal petal attendants but I'm wondering how incredibly odd it will really look. Obviously they aren't going to be dressed up like little girl flower girls. 

Thoughts?

Yeah, no. I am 25 and wouldn't be caught dead being a "petal attendant" (GAG). This is a made-up job for little girls so that everyone can "awwwwwwwww" at them. That is literally the only purpose. I sincerly doubt that your ADULT (not little) neices are actually okay with this/wanting to do it. Make them bridesmaids or have them as guests.

Fairyjen1

     As long as they are good with being flower girls then I have no problem with this. Flower girls over 10 years of age falls under tradition and not etiquette , as long as your nieces want to do this you aren't hurting anyone so go for it. 

     If the girls in any way feel like they are B-list bridesmaids though, then I would just make them bridesmaids instead. My niece would think being an adult flower girl the coolest thing ever. 

    

LittleWohlscheid

geekykitties said:

My sweet little nieces are actually adults. By the time my wedding date rolls around they will be 25, 23, and 19 years old. But I really want them to be my flower girls... flower ladies... pedal attendants. The girls are actually excited and want to be pedal attendants but I'm wondering how incredibly odd it will really look. Obviously they aren't going to be dressed up like little girl flower girls. 

Thoughts?

If they want to and you want to and everyone is happy with it, do it. Definitely unique, but if everyone is happy, there's not really a reason not to. But avoid "girl" in the title, for sure.

[Deleted User]

LittleWohlscheid said:

geekykitties said:

My sweet little nieces are actually adults. By the time my wedding date rolls around they will be 25, 23, and 19 years old. But I really want them to be my flower girls... flower ladies... pedal attendants. The girls are actually excited and want to be pedal attendants but I'm wondering how incredibly odd it will really look. Obviously they aren't going to be dressed up like little girl flower girls. 

Thoughts?

If they want to and you want to and everyone is happy with it, do it. Definitely unique, but if everyone is happy, there's not really a reason not to. But avoid "girl" in the title, for sure.

why is "girl" insulting, but "maid" is just fine?

LittleWohlscheid

@adk19 "girl" implies they are not adults, but "maid" just means unwed. If they're fine with girl, then that's up to them. I personally wouldn't call an adult a girl, that's all.

ohannabelle

flow·er girl noun 1. a young girl who carries flowers or scatters them in front of the bride at a wedding; a child bridesmaid. 

That's why it's so damned annoying. A flower girl is a flower girl. A girl. A child. As our friend the dictionary points out, the child bridesmaid. If she is no longer a child....Ta Dum! She's a bridesmaid. Why call a bridesmaid a flower girl in some weird effort to be cute? It just...makes...no...sense. Zero sense. I don't understand this at all. 

Believe me, I'm a person who thinks outside the box, but I don't think it's charming or cute or cool or whatever to call the box a bowl, or a cup. 

Words have definitions. Those definitions are already assigned. 

Why would anyone call their bridesmaids "flower girls?" Those words specifically mean a child.

Am I making any sense at all? Just...why? What's the point, here?

aurianna

I went to a wedding this summer with an adult flower girl. Sorry, "Flower Maiden."
At first she started walking down the aisle just handing people flowers and me and my SIL were mouthing "What the eff is this?" to each other before we found out what she was in the program. I have to assume we were not the only people in the church side-eyeing it / thinking it was weird.
But more importantly, the maiden seemed visibly uncomfortable.

So follow these steps:
1. Decide how badly you want these girls in your wedding. If it's not that much and you're adamant that it's flower girl or nothing, pick nothing and stop at this step. If you really want them in your wedding regardless, continue to step 2.
2. If you mind confusing / annoying / weirding out your guests, skip directly to step 4. If not, proceed to step 3.
3. Ask these nieces what they would like to do. Give them a choice: "Bridesmaid / Flower girl / reader / guest. If any of them actually PICK to be flower girls, I guess let them do it if you don't mind #2. If no one picks it, then odds are they would feel it's too baby a job and wouldn't want it. Stop at this step.
4. Either ask these girls if they would like to be readers or bridesmaids (or guests). Those are the only honors for adults.