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Snarky Brides

Bridezilla Rant...the bride giving outragous demands

So I am a bride to be and so is one of my bridesmaids as well. As her wedding approches (Oct 11) she is become more of a bridezilla and some of her demands are becoming to much.

She is having a destination wedding in Clearwater Beach, Fl on Oct 11. She already has made the demands that we stay at the same place she is which is somewhat expensive and also requires a week stay in order to book which we have to pay for ourselves. She also wanted us all to get the same dress and the dress she picked was about $250. On top of that now she is requiring us to go to this place down there that does hair and make up and it's literally almost over $100 for that which is a estimate depending on hair length...which is mine is some what long so the lady said mine might be about $125 (once again...pay for ourselves)

After having to pay for all of this she made a comment and worded it as "I would like to treat you ladies to a spa day when we are down there one day! It's a bridal party package and I feel you ladies deserve it". Now maybe it is just me and the other bridesmaids but when you hear this it makes it sound like she is paying for this "spa day". After we all agreed to it after reading the text we recieved we come find out that this package is almost $250 per girl since it includes mani, pedi, massage, facials, and eyebrow and brazilian wax. When another bridesmaid decided to say thank you for getting us that package since it was very expensive...she looked at her with a confused look and said "what are you talking about...you all are on your own for paying for your alls. I am just paying for mine." Word travels fast and soon after this comment was made...we all back out of the spa thing. Bride threw a fit and said either we go to this spa day or we are out of the wedding....

I am also a bride to be and moving out in a month. It has been everything to be able to get the money to pay this far. I had some money saved up on the side because I am using this as my vacation for this year but that $250 pretty much takes away a good amount of it. I do not know really what to do at the point. I do not want to lose a friend over this but I can not go broke over someone elses wedding when I am still trying to save up for a good portion of mine. Am I the one being unreasonable in this or no? Any advice helps as well.

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Re: Bridezilla Rant...the bride giving outragous demands

  • Yeah, I'd be out.  Thats bloody ridiculous.
    PrettyGirlLost
  • Wow, your yearly vacation is for this chick's wedding?  She sounds like a really great friend.
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    southernbelle0915hellohkbPrettyGirlLost
  • LondonLisaLondonLisa London, UK member
    2500 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    edited September 2014
    I agree with PP- drop out of the wedding and use the money/ holiday time for you and your fi to have a nice relaxing trip somewhere you want to go.

    Call her bluff. Anyone who would say either X or you're out of the wedding would see the back of me really fast. That's not a friend, that is an emotional bully.
    [Deleted User]SoontobeMrsNytesnovella1186PrettyGirlLost
  • larrygagalarrygaga Czechoslovakia member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
  • climbingwifeclimbingwife NYC 'burbs member
    10000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    That is insanity. I'd drop out of the wedding, drop her as a friend and never look back. A person that treats their friends like that is not a friend worth having. 

    I was friends with a girl that acted like a total nightmare bridezilla while planning her wedding (I was a bridesmaid). The way she treated the other BMs was an eye-opener to me. It spoke volumes about her character. I haven't seen or spoken to her in months. Who's got time for crappy friends? 

    PrettyGirlLost
  • It's almost like she's trying to see how much she can get away with...

    I agree with this:
    jacques27 said:
    If you don't want to remove yourself from the wedding, then I would just practice the following sentence over and over and over:

    "I'm sorry, but that is out of my budget.  I will..."

    ...be staying at the Travelodge down the road.
    ...do my own hair and make-up.
    ...do my own mani/pedi and remain hairy. (Seriously, unless your bridesmaid dress is a thong bikini, why are there brazilian waxes involved?)
    *********************************************************************************

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    ohannabellersbloomPrettyGirlLost
  • levioosalevioosa Southern California member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 5 Answers
    hales2010 said:

    Thank you for all the opinions. After posting this yesterday I ended up going out to meet one of her other bridesmaids (who is also planning a wedding and has a kid). We decided that enough was enough and decided to go talk to her about it to see if we could reason with her. When we got over there we told her that we were both already spending more on this wedding than we expected to and that this last little bit was not in our budget. She seriously started crying and then got her mom involved who continued to yell at me because she is also spending a lot on my wedding......

    Just some back ground on my wedding...its here in the town we live in, 5 minutes from where she lives, her bridesmaids dress was $50, and I am letting them do there own hair and make up. My wedding is no where near a huge formal event.

    About an hour in this arguement and trying to reason with her, her mom kicked us both out of the wedding for being rude and unreasonable bridesmaids. She wanted the dresses back and said she would pay us for them. She also gave me my bridesmaids dress that she got for my wedding because if I was not going to be in her wedding she was not going to be in mine (which I did pay her for). I was also able to get my deposit back for where we were staying in Clearwater. This is all fine with me because all that extra money can go toward my and my FI's honeymoon, wedding, or our house. Did I lose a friend because of this? More than likely but you can't treat people like that expect us to take it. I felt mostly bad for the other girl. Bride's mom was guilting her because she bought her an expensive car seat for a baby shower 2 years ago but she wasnt willing to return the favor for her daughter's wedding. She wasnt able to get an expensive gift for the bride due to planning her own wedding and having a kid and that is apparently tacky and rude. I am relieved to be out of the mess though.

    Wow, that all is a hot mess.  Sorry you had to deal with it.  

    The only thing I would have to say is it sounds like Bride's mom might be putting a lot of pressure on her, and that was filtering down to you guys.  Doesn't make her actions right by any means, but it does kind of make some sense.  I mean, the MOM kicked you out of the wedding, not even the Bride???  That's insane.  

    You dodged a bullet.


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    hellohkb
  • HeatherKatHeatherKat the Frozen Tundra member
    Ninth Anniversary 500 Love Its 100 Comments Name Dropper
    hales2010 said:

    Thank you for all the opinions. After posting this yesterday I ended up going out to meet one of her other bridesmaids (who is also planning a wedding and has a kid). We decided that enough was enough and decided to go talk to her about it to see if we could reason with her. When we got over there we told her that we were both already spending more on this wedding than we expected to and that this last little bit was not in our budget. She seriously started crying and then got her mom involved who continued to yell at me because she is also spending a lot on my wedding......

    Just some back ground on my wedding...its here in the town we live in, 5 minutes from where she lives, her bridesmaids dress was $50, and I am letting them do there own hair and make up. My wedding is no where near a huge formal event.

    About an hour in this arguement and trying to reason with her, her mom kicked us both out of the wedding for being rude and unreasonable bridesmaids. She wanted the dresses back and said she would pay us for them. She also gave me my bridesmaids dress that she got for my wedding because if I was not going to be in her wedding she was not going to be in mine (which I did pay her for). I was also able to get my deposit back for where we were staying in Clearwater. This is all fine with me because all that extra money can go toward my and my FI's honeymoon, wedding, or our house. Did I lose a friend because of this? More than likely but you can't treat people like that expect us to take it. I felt mostly bad for the other girl. Bride's mom was guilting her because she bought her an expensive car seat for a baby shower 2 years ago but she wasnt willing to return the favor for her daughter's wedding. She wasnt able to get an expensive gift for the bride due to planning her own wedding and having a kid and that is apparently tacky and rude. I am relieved to be out of the mess though.

    To the bolded-- I wouldn't give her the dress until you have payment in hand. Just in case.
    Amor vincet omnia.... par liones.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker

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    ashley8918PrettyGirlLostnewvalley
  • hales2010 said:

    So I am a bride to be and so is one of my bridesmaids as well. As her wedding approches (Oct 11) she is become more of a bridezilla and some of her demands are becoming to much.

    She is having a destination wedding in Clearwater Beach, Fl on Oct 11. She already has made the demands that we stay at the same place she is which is somewhat expensive and also requires a week stay in order to book which we have to pay for ourselves. She also wanted us all to get the same dress and the dress she picked was about $250. On top of that now she is requiring us to go to this place down there that does hair and make up and it's literally almost over $100 for that which is a estimate depending on hair length...which is mine is some what long so the lady said mine might be about $125 (once again...pay for ourselves)

    After having to pay for all of this she made a comment and worded it as "I would like to treat you ladies to a spa day when we are down there one day! It's a bridal party package and I feel you ladies deserve it". Now maybe it is just me and the other bridesmaids but when you hear this it makes it sound like she is paying for this "spa day". After we all agreed to it after reading the text we recieved we come find out that this package is almost $250 per girl since it includes mani, pedi, massage, facials, and eyebrow and brazilian wax. When another bridesmaid decided to say thank you for getting us that package since it was very expensive...she looked at her with a confused look and said "what are you talking about...you all are on your own for paying for your alls. I am just paying for mine." Word travels fast and soon after this comment was made...we all back out of the spa thing. Bride threw a fit and said either we go to this spa day or we are out of the wedding....

    I am also a bride to be and moving out in a month. It has been everything to be able to get the money to pay this far. I had some money saved up on the side because I am using this as my vacation for this year but that $250 pretty much takes away a good amount of it. I do not know really what to do at the point. I do not want to lose a friend over this but I can not go broke over someone elses wedding when I am still trying to save up for a good portion of mine. Am I the one being unreasonable in this or no? Any advice helps as well.

    This line cracks me up! How is she treating you, if you are paying for it? Because she is paying for her own and not forcing the BP to? How nice?

    Sorry OP that you had to go through this and possibly lose a friend. Was the bride there when you got kicked out by the mom? She just stood there and let her mom kick you out?

    This sounds like a blessing in disguise if you get all your money back, and take a real vaca with you FI. It absolutely blows my mind how brides can be this demanding!!! 
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    Anniversary
    [Deleted User]
  • I am also saying, "PHEW!!!" for you.  I'm sorry you have probably lost a friend over this, but what a blessing to have your week of vacation back, plus not have to stay at that expensive hotel.  I'm so glad you were able to get your deposit back for that.

    And yes...in what alternate universe does the word "treating" suddenly mean the opposite? 

    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • I would band together with the other bridesmaids and say, "no". When you tell someone you want to "treat them" the implication is clear that it is their money, not yours. Who doesn't know that? If everyone else also takes a stand she'll either realize she's being unreasonable or have zero bridal party. 
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    KLM7386newvalley
  • You surely dodged a bullet there and she is not the friend you think she is if she was treating you all this way.

    Any idea if any of the other bridesmaids will follow suit here or will they suck it up?  Do they want the dresses back so they can replace you?  I would just love to be asked to be a replacement BM with that big fat price tag attached to it....said no one ever.

    PrettyGirlLost
  • NYCMercedesNYCMercedes BOS, NYC, DC. Forever a city girl member
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I'm sorry you lost a friend. That mom and bride deserved to be dropped, however. Kudos to you for standing your ground.
  • She has 6 of us and the 2 of us back out yesterday. We told the other we were out last night. I know one is thinking about it now just because of how expensive it has gotten.
  • This lady sounds like a nightmare.
    debbeau
  • I suspect this girl is entrenched in her position at this point and has a mom who is probably the pot stirrer in the situation, encouraging her daughter to be selfish. 

    Oh well, but a great example of a super bridezilla and the momzilla that spawned her. 
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  • Massive Mom-Zilla.  As other posters have said, it seems like a blessing in disguise.  Also, the mom has a lot of nerve bringing up an expensive car seat she bought 2 years ago....and then rubbed it in your friend's face?  Evil bitch.
    Kaurishuskypuppy14MommyKristin88PrettyGirlLost
  • Sounds like Mom may be all the bride has left when the shit show is over.
    ohannabelleluckysnorkelPrettyGirlLost
  • I'm glad you got out of this hot mess. And I would be willing to bet some of the others might follow suit.

    $250 says that spa day never happens, because the others all back out and the bride wants to save herself from walking down the aisle alone. 
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