A few weeks ago I posted about being stuck in the middle between someone I know from high school and my FI. For those that didn't read it, basically the punch line is that "John" (friend) refused to meet "Paul" (FI) when we started dating. John and I didn't speak until a mutual friend's block party. At the block party, John approached Paul and introduced himself to Paul, and they started talking.
Fast forward to today: Paul is still holding a grudge. When I reminded him that I was doing a walk for Epilepsy next week and that John is going to be there, Paul got mad. (Side note: John is gay!) Paul is saying that I'm gullible for allowing John to be in my life. I told him that I was raised to forgive, and that if John chooses to hurt me again, that it's his fault, not mine. Paul says he would prefer not to invite John to the wedding, but if he's there it's not a big deal.
Paul and I did our PreCana in the summer, and one thing they emphasized was that "the spouse always comes first." John was 100% wrong for not even giving Paul a chance. John and I have been texting (mainly work stuff...we are both teachers), and I have told Paul about it.
I don't want Paul to feel betrayed, which he obviously does, but part of me feels like he's trying to control me. I fully plan on still doing the Epilepsy walk. (My friend and my brother are both epileptic). Paul was originally going to go but once he found out John was going to be there he decided not to go. (Babyish, I know!) He said he will just do something with his kids that day.
I don't know what to do.


Re: Torn: update
If I remember correctly from the earlier post the problem originally was that John was jealous when OP and Paul got together so he refused to meet Paul until the block party. Now Paul is mad that John was so judegmental and is being a big fat baby over spending any time with him.
ETA: sorry if the term baby is harsh, but OP did use it in her own post.
I'm the fuck out.
I'm the fuck out.
Being gay is not a 'lifestyle'. It's life.
*euphemism for what I really wanted to say that might be a little too honest
If you're planning to have children with him, what happens if you have a child who turns out to be gay?
Just really confused about why you're willing to compromise on something you believe to be wrong, since you are clearly not homophobic and are ashamed that he is. And that's not even to mention the controlling behavior. He clearly wants to control who you can and can't be friends with, to suit his bullshit beliefs, and that's completely unacceptable.
I'm the fuck out.