What happened to that crazy thread?

ashley8918

Hahahahaha

jdluvr06

lolo883 said:

lolo883 said:

So @lolo883 how was your day?

It was pretty quiet overall @beethery, thanks for asking! I just ate some delicious quinoa. DH is out, and I'm not concerned about what he's doing. How was your day?

Well I just finished making homemade chicken bakes, which come out totally different than the delicious wonderful ones from Costco. They're inspired by the Costco ones, but they are pretty dang good.

FI just got home from soccer and is watching TNF. I'm about to fold some clothes and watch Rehab Addict. How's the job search going?

...am I stuck in no box land? Usually am on mobile... It's going nowhere. I need to update my resume but I keep saying "no Lolo, do thank you cards first." Instead I've done neither. I suck.

You don't suck. You just need to relax. Thank you notes and resume updates will be there tomorrow.

mrsmagicgeek

I'm rather surprised at some of the distinctly un-modlike behavior in this thread. Apparently I missed something, but this seems rather overboard.

Sugargirl1019

MY LIFE TOTALLY SUCKS THIS HAPPENED WHILE I WAS AT WORK??

ashley8918

mrsmagicgeek said:

I'm rather surprised at some of the distinctly un-modlike behavior in this thread. Apparently I missed something, but this seems rather overboard.

Specifically? Because I don't see it.

lurkergirl

Sugargirl1019 said:

MY LIFE TOTALLY SUCKS THIS HAPPENED WHILE I WAS AT WORK??

< br > < br >
Stuck as fuck
< br > < br >
This made me laugh probably harder than it should have.

Eta I hate you tk formatting

theartistformerlyknownas

mrsmagicgeek said:

I'm rather surprised at some of the distinctly un-modlike behavior in this thread. Apparently I missed something, but this seems rather overboard.

How so? Mods aren't asked to be nuns, just delete spam and keep people from personal harassment. There's no rule about anyone snarking on information that's been posted, mod or not. Nobody violated TOS and that's the highest law any of us are held to.

lyndausvi

lolo883 said:

I'm rather surprised at some of the distinctly un-modlike behavior in this thread. Apparently I missed something, but this seems rather overboard.

How so? Mods aren't asked to be nuns, just delete spam and keep people from personal harassment. There's no rule about anyone snarking on information that's been posted, mod or not. Nobody violated TOS and that's the highest law any of us are held to.

WHAT?   You mean I didn't have go out and buy the habit and learn how to do this?

theartistformerlyknownas

@lyndausvi‌ you absolutely needed to do that. And also keep your snark.

larrygaga

I MISSED EVERYTHINGGGGG

beethery

I don't get to be a nun because I'm the Pope. Conflict of interest.

JCbride2015

larrygaga said:

I MISSED EVERYTHINGGGGG

Me too.  Damn work!

huskypuppy14

mrsmagicgeek said:

I'm rather surprised at some of the distinctly un-modlike behavior in this thread. Apparently I missed something, but this seems rather overboard.

You mean the snarky brides mod was snarky? That's maddness!

steph861

Anybody else feel like this has been a weird day on TK? Even setting aside the BSJB thread, that is.

mrsmagicgeek

I don't know, this board has just gotten a bit tough lately. Less chit chat, more attacking. I just think when someone displays obvious and admitted mental issues, being mean isn't really going to help. Sometimes leaving it alone and gong back to talking about what's for dinner or whatever is better. Just my two cents.

beethery

@steph11814 it's definitely been a weird day here.

larrygaga

I also feel like there have been a lot of breakups lately. Maybe it's just a negative time of the year.

JCbride2015

mrsmagicgeek said:

I don't know, this board has just gotten a bit tough lately. Less chit chat, more attacking. I just think when someone displays obvious and admitted mental issues, being mean isn't really going to help. Sometimes leaving it alone and gong back to talking about what's for dinner or whatever is better. Just my two cents.

I wasn't here for most of the thread at issue.  But yeah lately, this board has been getting a little crazy.  So many intense relationship problems.

I think when somebody is showing red flags of, say, an abusive relationship or mental problems, and they post online, the community is not "attacking" when we try to point out those red flags.  

theartistformerlyknownas

JCbride2015 said:

mrsmagicgeek said:

I don't know, this board has just gotten a bit tough lately. Less chit chat, more attacking. I just think when someone displays obvious and admitted mental issues, being mean isn't really going to help. Sometimes leaving it alone and gong back to talking about what's for dinner or whatever is better. Just my two cents.

I wasn't here for most of the thread at issue.  But yeah lately, this board has been getting a little crazy.  So many intense relationship problems.

I think when somebody is showing red flags of, say, an abusive relationship or mental problems, and they post online, the community is not "attacking" when we try to point out those red flags.  

This. Nobody was calling her dumb for staying with him or anything that would constitute an "attack." She asked for advice, people tried to give real advice, and then she was vague as fuck about everything and you can't just fly the depression flag and get all sunshine and rainbows from anyone. Particularly when you're sounding extra MUDdy because that only trivializes other people's struggles.

mrsmagicgeek

Oh I agree, for the most part it's very valid advice and the "tough love" is very definitely needed at times (especially lately, for some weird reason), it just sometimes crosses the line over to mean for the sake of being mean when it gets to "fuck off" or "don't let the door hit you in the ass on your way out".

I don't know, maybe I'm just overly sensitive tonight, and if that's the case, I apologize. It just seems sometimes that if you're one of the "cool kids" you can say things that others get ripped apart for. I kind of like coming to the chit chat board to relax and get dinner ideas, but lately it's been more of a cross between etiquette and snarky, and not really in a funny way.

Like I said, though, maybe it's just me. I just put myself in the shoes of some of the posters and I would be very upset if the pack went after me the way it does sometimes.

I probably just need sleep.

Edit: I swear there were paragraphs.

beethery

mrsmagicgeek said:

I don't know, this board has just gotten a bit tough lately. Less chit chat, more attacking. I just think when someone displays obvious and admitted mental issues, being mean isn't really going to help. Sometimes leaving it alone and gong back to talking about what's for dinner or whatever is better. Just my two cents.

Asking about discrepancies is not mean and does not constitute an attack.

We see this kind of thing all the time with bad etiquette, you just have to be able to catch it.

SS: I want people to pay for their own meals, how do I word that nicely?

Us: Don't do that, it's awful.

SS: THAT'S NOT WHAT I ASKED YOU!!!!!

Us: If you asked what getaway car you should use after you rob a bank, we would tell you not to do it because it's bad. Same deal.

Saying "Hi guys I'm back from my self-imposed TK break because we're getting married with a cake/punch reception ASAP due to ~*problems*~ that have deemed a quickie wedding necessary. I need tons of support and guidance!!!!!" and then getting pissy when commenters were like "What's the problem?" is not indicative of mental illness on her part, and it certainly doesn't constitute an attack on the behalf of others who were not about to ignore the potential ~*problem*~. Especially when she said it was her FI's idea to get married, not hers, and then all manner of other bullshit.

ETA:

If someone comes back after they thought their account was closed, it is very obvious to everybody that the WHOLE REASON for coming back was to read what anyone might've said about them. They would have no idea if their account was still active if they hadn't come back.

Even more so obvious when the person then PM's somebody about it and then COMMENTS that people dared to speak about her.

Saying "peace be the journey" and referring to her being "halfway out the door" made sense in context with that she was asking for her account to be deleted anyway.

levioosa

 

mrsmagicgeek said:

Oh I agree, for the most part it's very valid advice and the "tough love" is very definitely needed at times (especially lately, for some weird reason), it just sometimes crosses the line over to mean for the sake of being mean when it gets to "fuck off" or "don't let the door hit you in the ass on your way out".

I don't know, maybe I'm just overly sensitive tonight, and if that's the case, I apologize. It just seems sometimes that if you're one of the "cool kids" you can say things that others get ripped apart for. I kind of like coming to the chit chat board to relax and get dinner ideas, but lately it's been more of a cross between etiquette and snarky, and not really in a funny way.

Like I said, though, maybe it's just me. I just put myself in the shoes of some of the posters and I would be very upset if the pack went after me the way it does sometimes.

I probably just need sleep.

Edit: I swear there were paragraphs.

I think a few comments were borderline on the snark and not very helpful.  However, it takes two to tango, and she was feeding into them.  IMO there's a big difference between an outright attack and a OP antagonizing right back.  

raissyrais

moutonrouge said:

If you search "the knot I am back and needs tons of" it is the first hit, and you can look at the cache copy from the drop down. It isn't complete, but it does include most of the good stuff. 

Because I'm a creeper and needed to know what happened. 

Why "moutonrouge" my darling little red lamb?

MegEn1

Sometimes TK can be super harsh, it's true. But marriage is harsh, and when people come on this board saying things like "We're getting married even though he cheated on me COME CONGRATULATE ME" I think a lot of us in good conscience can't jump on the happy train with that person. We're all married or getting married here, we all understand that it is not only a big step for us personally but is a fairly important institution we're stepping into. We ALL should have a moment where we reflect on if this is the right thing for us, for our lives, for our futures, etc. Because if your relationship is on the rocks maybe, just maybe, you shouldn't be getting married right now. A ring and a $40,000 bill will not make the problems go away.

Side Note - Holy Handgranades, Batman. I miss all the good stuff!

esstee33

@mrsmagicgeek There were quite a few people in that thread offering very genuine, legitimate advice, several of whom have also struggled with mental health issues. When you've suffered from depression and anxiety and come out on the other side, it's easy to recognize someone making very poor decisions as a result of their illness and the natural impulse is to try to help them not do that. She chose to lash out at people in response, maybe because she was honestly naive enough to think people wouldn't comment about it and would actually just answer her etiquette questions. But given that she posted it on CC and not E, though, and since that she was toying with people throughout the entire thread by withholding info and being deliberately vague, it certainly seems like she just wanted to stir up shit. I don't think anyone was mean to her at all. Don't act out for attention if you don't want attention. 

novella1186

That whole thing was bizarre. I'm still somewhat of a newbie... Or maybe a mediumbie? at this point so I haven't seen it all yet. But people were showing genuine concern for her and she was really lashing out. I didn't understand how that plane went down so hard, so fast.

To say "who are you?" to someone who replies to her post in a public forum on the internet? And then to say "you're not bad people except the newbies who don't know anything."? Yikes.

sarawifenow

CMGragain said:

SaraBrideSoon said:

@AddieCake--recap.

 

Chick goes: I'm back and need TONS of advice because I am marrying a guy I was just saying less than two months ago that I thought was cheating on me and now I am marrying in 3 weeks! Do you think my cake and punch reception is good?

 

Then we go: Are you sure?! You were just saying how bad the relationship was.

 

Then she goes: I am getting married because of a sudden unfortunate reason!

 

Then we go: Are you pregnant???

 

Then she goes: Noooooo....FI wants to change his name.

 

Then we told her how dumb that is then she was like, "Oh wait I am pregnant!" Then we called MUD and she started backpedalling.

 

Anyone? Did I miss something?

Totally off topic, but please don't use "go" when you really mean "said, wrote, posted".  It's so high school!  I cringe when I hear or read this grammatical error.  I also hate "like" used as a verbal pause, but most people don't write that, thank goodness!
I missed all the drama.

Well if that wasn't one of the pettiest things that you have written in awhile, I don't know what is.

KatieinBkln

What a shitshow that was. I can't remember who suggested bipolar disorder, but the suddenness of everything combined with the nonsensical lashing out and weird "jokes" actually made me think she might've been dealing with a manic episode. (Caveat: I am not a doctor, I am not a doctor, I am not a doctor). In which case I can only wish her the best and hope she gets help. Doesn't mean that whole thread wasn't hella irritating, though.

And just in case there is any confusion: people are allowed to express irritation, snark on bad behavior, and even write with "improper" grammar/usage. Of course anyone else is welcome to be annoyed with any of those things, but I can't help feeling that calling people out about any of them is wasted breath.

buttercup1958

I honestly feel bad for he I also feel bad that I haven't been able to knot lately. Damn work and school!

lyndausvi

SaraBrideSoon said:

CMGragain said:

SaraBrideSoon said:

@AddieCake--recap.

 

Chick goes: I'm back and need TONS of advice because I am marrying a guy I was just saying less than two months ago that I thought was cheating on me and now I am marrying in 3 weeks! Do you think my cake and punch reception is good?

 

Then we go: Are you sure?! You were just saying how bad the relationship was.

 

Then she goes: I am getting married because of a sudden unfortunate reason!

 

Then we go: Are you pregnant???

 

Then she goes: Noooooo....FI wants to change his name.

 

Then we told her how dumb that is then she was like, "Oh wait I am pregnant!" Then we called MUD and she started backpedalling.

 

Anyone? Did I miss something?

Totally off topic, but please don't use "go" when you really mean "said, wrote, posted".  It's so high school!  I cringe when I hear or read this grammatical error.  I also hate "like" used as a verbal pause, but most people don't write that, thank goodness!
I missed all the drama.

Well if that wasn't one of the pettiest things that you have written in awhile, I don't know what is.

Maybe I'm just weird, but I totally read that as a script from a teen movie or TV show.   In my brain it's was a Winona Ryder from  Heathers trying to tell a story in a typical teenage slang way.

Maybe it's just me.  ::shrugs::