Moms and Maids

Bridesmaid Gift Opinions...

2

Re: Bridesmaid Gift Opinions...

  • Original Tinkerbell is a judgmental bitch. I'm loving that first one.
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  • I'm getting my girls 3 things
    1 - red sash go go with their dress
    2 - lip colour {some are red, some are nude}
    3 - possibly a small bag that could be used that day to carry things or in future in a purse. small enough to carry, big enough to hold stuff {phone, mirror, lip colour, money, etc}

    I originally debated on nail colour that would match the wedding, but my bachelorette party is at a spa getting our nails done ..... SOOOO that's out lol

    It's also hard cuz not everyone is that girlie, so I wanted stuff to be functional also. 
  • arrippaarrippa member
    Eighth Anniversary 1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited May 2015
    I'm getting my girls 3 things
    1 - red sash go go with their dress
    2 - lip colour {some are red, some are nude}
    3 - possibly a small bag that could be used that day to carry things or in future in a purse. small enough to carry, big enough to hold stuff {phone, mirror, lip colour, money, etc}

    I originally debated on nail colour that would match the wedding, but my bachelorette party is at a spa getting our nails done ..... SOOOO that's out lol

    It's also hard cuz not everyone is that girlie, so I wanted stuff to be functional also. 

    So basically you are giving them things to use for your wedding. How nice.
  • I'm getting my girls 3 things
    1 - red sash go go with their dress
    2 - lip colour {some are red, some are nude}
    3 - possibly a small bag that could be used that day to carry things or in future in a purse. small enough to carry, big enough to hold stuff {phone, mirror, lip colour, money, etc}

    I originally debated on nail colour that would match the wedding, but my bachelorette party is at a spa getting our nails done ..... SOOOO that's out lol

    It's also hard cuz not everyone is that girlie, so I wanted stuff to be functional also. 
    These aren't gifts for them. They're gifts for you. You should really buy things they'd enjoy - shop for them like it's their birthday. 
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  • HappyAnjelHappyAnjel member
    Fourth Anniversary 10 Comments Name Dropper 5 Love Its
    edited May 2015
    as others have stated, it's not a gift if it's to be used for or at your wedding.  They should be selected the same way you would select a Christmas or birthday gift for a friend.. and because I assume your bridesmaids are not all the same person, they most likely shouldn't match. I spent about the same on all of them, but they all received gifts to suit their tastes.

    I got my bridesmaids all different things, I got one Alex and Ani bracelets, and a gift card to her favorite store with a reusable bag.. I got another a Vera Bradley tote bag and matching clutch.. and the third received, an Alex and Ani bracelet, wine, and some cooking stuff.
  • MobKaz said:
    I will never understand why a bride has to be so micromanaging that they feel compelled to dictate the color of nail polish worn.
    One of my old co-workers was in a wedding where the bride said that they could only have French manicures or pastels. I totally side-eyed that.
  • MobKazMobKaz member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    MobKaz said:
    I will never understand why a bride has to be so micromanaging that they feel compelled to dictate the color of nail polish worn.
    One of my old co-workers was in a wedding where the bride said that they could only have French manicures or pastels. I totally side-eyed that.
    I have yet to see an 8 x 10 glossy of BM hands hanging on the wall of any newly wedded couple. This concept, along with matching hair styles, needs to die.
  • Why the FUCK do you care what color their nails are?
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • AddieCake said:
    Why the FUCK do you care what color their nails are?
    Exactly. No one is going to notice the nails of the bride, let alone the BM.
  • MobKaz said:
    I will never understand why a bride has to be so micromanaging that they feel compelled to dictate the color of nail polish worn.
    One of my old co-workers was in a wedding where the bride said that they could only have French manicures or pastels. I totally side-eyed that.
    If I was given that requirement I'd have my nails painted deep plum.  And if I was given a choice and not had a color forced on me, I'd probably go with clear polish or a nude or light pink polish.  But I'd totally be passive agressive if given a nail color requirement.

  • AddieCake said:
    Why the FUCK do you care what color their nails are?
    Exactly. No one is going to notice the nails of the bride, let alone the BM.

    I would be annoyed if someone wanted me to wear nail polish. I don't like it because it chips so quickly and I hate the way chips look, and it's difficult to do neatly.  

    I didn't even wear nail polish to MY wedding.  Although, to be honest, I was talking about getting a manicure and just never got around to it.  

    I have since been a MOH twice and a BM once.  None of those times did I wear nail polish.  That fact is certainly not noticeable in any photographs and I doubt anyone noticed at the wedding.
  • I did get my girls tote bags with their initials, but only because I knew they'd use them.  As far as wedding jewelry goes,  get every girl something different that goes with their own personal style. I think gift cards are a great idea as well as a bottle of her favorite booze.  I also love the idea of a different clutch for each girl.  If she can use it more than once she will appreciate it more.

    Emergency kits are tacky, plus you usually throw one in the bathroom of your reception venue anyway.  If you have self-conscious girls, getting them all the same thing to get ready in can be uncomfortable.

    Make it personal, not identical.  Hope that helps!
  • The wedding I was in Saturday, our bridesmaid gifts were earrings and necklaces which were part of our attire for the day.

    Which I promptly left in the hotel room because the earrings were not nickel free and made my ears swell and the necklace broke. Give them gifts as your friends. Not your wedding props.

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  • mikenberger said:

    The wedding I was in Saturday, our bridesmaid gifts were earrings and necklaces which were part of our attire for the day
    Which I promptly left in the hotel room because the earrings were not nickel free and made my ears swell and the necklace broke. Give them gifts as your friends. Not your wedding props.

    haha my sister gave all of her BM's a brooch and earrings to wear. I'm not 90 years old, so I will never wear a brooch again and I lost the earrings that night. I am cheesy and getting all of my BM's the hangers with their names on them for pictures, and yes I am doing the oversized button ups with their initials for getting ready. Again, just for pictures. But those aren't their gifts. I agree you shouldn't be "gifting" what you expect them to wear. I am doing something different for each BM, like one LOVES Kendra Scott. So I am going to get her something Kendra Scott. Not everyone likes it, so I wouldn't waste my money on something they will never wear.  

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  • spglspspglsp member
    Seventh Anniversary 100 Love Its 100 Comments Name Dropper
    I'm getting my girls 3 things
    1 - red sash go go with their dress
    2 - lip colour {some are red, some are nude}
    3 - possibly a small bag that could be used that day to carry things or in future in a purse. small enough to carry, big enough to hold stuff {phone, mirror, lip colour, money, etc}

    I originally debated on nail colour that would match the wedding, but my bachelorette party is at a spa getting our nails done ..... SOOOO that's out lol

    It's also hard cuz not everyone is that girlie, so I wanted stuff to be functional also. 
    No woman has ever said to herself, "you know what would be really functional? A red sash." Don't get me wrong, some of the snark on the bridesmaids gifts can get a bit heavy. I received candles as a gift once and it was pretty awesome because damnit, I love candles! It's more about knowing the women in your life and getting them personalized things that aren't about your wedding (no, personalized does not mean monogramed in this context). Stop thinking about it as a gift for your bridesmaid and start thinking of it as a gift for your friend.
    Just Married!

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  • If we have the extra money, I was thinking of getting each girl a Vera Bradley bag that they could use after the wedding and putting a mix of personal gifts and things for the wedding in it (have to have the cute robe pics-sorry!).
  • If we have the extra money, I was thinking of getting each girl a Vera Bradley bag that they could use after the wedding and putting a mix of personal gifts and things for the wedding in it (have to have the cute robe pics-sorry!).
    And what if they're not comfortable being photographed in a robe?



  • Viczaesar said:
    If we have the extra money, I was thinking of getting each girl a Vera Bradley bag that they could use after the wedding and putting a mix of personal gifts and things for the wedding in it (have to have the cute robe pics-sorry!).
    And what if they're not comfortable being photographed in a robe?
    You can photograph me in a robe, but I WILL be wearing yoga pants (and possibly a t-shirt) under said robe.  Nobody takes pictures of me in any state of undress.
  • Viczaesar said:
    If we have the extra money, I was thinking of getting each girl a Vera Bradley bag that they could use after the wedding and putting a mix of personal gifts and things for the wedding in it (have to have the cute robe pics-sorry!).
    And what if they're not comfortable being photographed in a robe?


    Then that bridesmaid gets fired.


    *of course joking



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  • Viczaesar said:
    If we have the extra money, I was thinking of getting each girl a Vera Bradley bag that they could use after the wedding and putting a mix of personal gifts and things for the wedding in it (have to have the cute robe pics-sorry!).
    And what if they're not comfortable being photographed in a robe?


    Then that bridesmaid gets fired.


    *of course joking



    YOU may be joking, but not everybody is.
  • For my gifts I'm paying for their hair and makeup just because I want them to feel pampered. They, of course, get to choose their style as they should.

    My non-wedding related gift are customized tumblers. I've debated on adding a "DIY Spa kit" but I'm not sure if I will be able to afford it since we're helping them out with lodging costs the day of plus lots of food trays to much on during the pamper session. 
  • For my gifts I'm paying for their hair and makeup just because I want them to feel pampered. They, of course, get to choose their style as they should.

    My non-wedding related gift are customized tumblers. I've debated on adding a "DIY Spa kit" but I'm not sure if I will be able to afford it since we're helping them out with lodging costs the day of plus lots of food trays to much on during the pamper session. 
    Did you read anything in this thread? Anything at all? How is getting their hair done for your wedding and your pictures a gift to them? And a cup - a freaking cup - wow - how great of you. 
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  • My question to myself would be this.  Is this something that I would get them for their birthday or Christmas?  If the answer is no then the present you are considering is not a good idea.

    So for all the brides out there buying specific jewelry or nail polish or a Disney makeup bag or a red sash.  Would you honestly buy that stuff for your friends for their birthday?

    I have never understood why BM gifts have become so damn cheesy and crappy and "OMG they have to be related to my wedding theme!!"  Giving me a pair of earrings in a Disney make up bag just tells me that you care more about your wedding then actually buying me a nice gift as your friend because 1) I don't have pierced ears and 2) am not a fan of Disney stuff.

  • @ adk19 and @ ShesSoCold

    Some snarky people here. Each of my girls is very down to earth and absolutely love tumblers. Two have one that they have been using for years (one has the graphic rubbed off while the other lost her lid) and another BM had to toss her tumbler due to leaking. I think they will love their new gift, but with that being said, I am also not rich and can't afford to do something grand or extravagant. In my opinion, heck I know the girls, a tumbler is a much better gift than a piece of jewelry they will never wear (since they don't wear any jewelry anyway) or some customized "Bridesmaid" object (clothes, jewelry, objects that say "bridesmaid"). This has their name and a cool design. Also, my bridesmaids are deep and understanding enough to enjoy and appreciate a practical gift.

    Yes, I would consider the hair and make up a gift. I would think it a gift if it was paid for me as a BM. Every wedding I have ever been in the wedding party for had a make up artist that you cover the fees. Anywhere from $65 to over $100. I could never afford it and while I'm not terrible at doing my make up, I envied the girls who were able to afford to be pampered with their hair and make up done. I'm horrible with hair. My girls are financially strapped and have admitted their concern for their appearance. So I helped. It cost me hundreds to cover their hair and make up so they can sit back for however long it takes on such a hectic day to relax.

    As the bride is it my job to cover the costs of their make up? No. Is it my job to cover the costs of their hair? No. I did so because I wanted to and anytime you spend money on someone, whether it be a service or a product, it is considered a gift. If someone came up to me and gave me a gift card to go get my hair colored. Its a gift. If someone gave me a gift card, or covered the cost of/for a pedicure/manicure, its a gift. Just because its my wedding day doesn't mean that it's not a gift. Yes it is. But is that the only gift I want to get them? No. I want them to have something they can keep and hold. Just because my gift is "a cup" does it make any less of a gift? No. If I could afford an expensive gift for each one, I would, but sadly, I can't.

    Also, She'ssocold (How fitting of a name), if you are so judgmental and rude as to downplay someone's gift, I would gladly accept the funds for a gift you deem appropriate for two MOH and three BMs.
  • @ adk19 and @ ShesSoCold

    Some snarky people here. Each of my girls is very down to earth and absolutely love tumblers. Two have one that they have been using for years (one has the graphic rubbed off while the other lost her lid) and another BM had to toss her tumbler due to leaking. I think they will love their new gift, but with that being said, I am also not rich and can't afford to do something grand or extravagant. In my opinion, heck I know the girls, a tumbler is a much better gift than a piece of jewelry they will never wear (since they don't wear any jewelry anyway) or some customized "Bridesmaid" object (clothes, jewelry, objects that say "bridesmaid"). This has their name and a cool design. Also, my bridesmaids are deep and understanding enough to enjoy and appreciate a practical gift.

    Yes, I would consider the hair and make up a gift. I would think it a gift if it was paid for me as a BM. Every wedding I have ever been in the wedding party for had a make up artist that you cover the fees. Anywhere from $65 to over $100. I could never afford it and while I'm not terrible at doing my make up, I envied the girls who were able to afford to be pampered with their hair and make up done. I'm horrible with hair. My girls are financially strapped and have admitted their concern for their appearance. So I helped. It cost me hundreds to cover their hair and make up so they can sit back for however long it takes on such a hectic day to relax.

    As the bride is it my job to cover the costs of their make up? No. Is it my job to cover the costs of their hair? No. I did so because I wanted to and anytime you spend money on someone, whether it be a service or a product, it is considered a gift. If someone came up to me and gave me a gift card to go get my hair colored. Its a gift. If someone gave me a gift card, or covered the cost of/for a pedicure/manicure, its a gift. Just because its my wedding day doesn't mean that it's not a gift. Yes it is. But is that the only gift I want to get them? No. I want them to have something they can keep and hold. Just because my gift is "a cup" does it make any less of a gift? No. If I could afford an expensive gift for each one, I would, but sadly, I can't.

    Also, She'ssocold (How fitting of a name), if you are so judgmental and rude as to downplay someone's gift, I would gladly accept the funds for a gift you deem appropriate for two MOH and three BMs.
    I find it odd that you know every single BM's tumbler situation. Either a) tumblers are a regular topic of conversation between you and your friends (which is objectively odd) OR b) you are making this up and trying to justify this gift. 

    Also, it's not like your only options for BM gifts are customized tumblers or jewelry. Use your imagination....give a coffee mug and specialty coffee to the coffee snob, a clutch and a scarf to the accessory lover, a Pandora One subscription to the music lover, a cutting board and nice knife to the chef, a mani gift certificate to the one who gets her nails done all the time......
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  • @ adk19 and @ ShesSoCold

    Some snarky people here. Each of my girls is very down to earth and absolutely love tumblers. Two have one that they have been using for years (one has the graphic rubbed off while the other lost her lid) and another BM had to toss her tumbler due to leaking. I think they will love their new gift, but with that being said, I am also not rich and can't afford to do something grand or extravagant. In my opinion, heck I know the girls, a tumbler is a much better gift than a piece of jewelry they will never wear (since they don't wear any jewelry anyway) or some customized "Bridesmaid" object (clothes, jewelry, objects that say "bridesmaid"). This has their name and a cool design. Also, my bridesmaids are deep and understanding enough to enjoy and appreciate a practical gift.

    Yes, I would consider the hair and make up a gift. I would think it a gift if it was paid for me as a BM. Every wedding I have ever been in the wedding party for had a make up artist that you cover the fees. Anywhere from $65 to over $100. I could never afford it and while I'm not terrible at doing my make up, I envied the girls who were able to afford to be pampered with their hair and make up done. I'm horrible with hair. My girls are financially strapped and have admitted their concern for their appearance. So I helped. It cost me hundreds to cover their hair and make up so they can sit back for however long it takes on such a hectic day to relax.

    As the bride is it my job to cover the costs of their make up? No. Is it my job to cover the costs of their hair? No. I did so because I wanted to and anytime you spend money on someone, whether it be a service or a product, it is considered a gift. If someone came up to me and gave me a gift card to go get my hair colored. Its a gift. If someone gave me a gift card, or covered the cost of/for a pedicure/manicure, its a gift. Just because its my wedding day doesn't mean that it's not a gift. Yes it is. But is that the only gift I want to get them? No. I want them to have something they can keep and hold. Just because my gift is "a cup" does it make any less of a gift? No. If I could afford an expensive gift for each one, I would, but sadly, I can't.

    Also, She'ssocold (How fitting of a name), if you are so judgmental and rude as to downplay someone's gift, I would gladly accept the funds for a gift you deem appropriate for two MOH and three BMs.
    I find it odd that you know every single BM's tumbler situation. Either a) tumblers are a regular topic of conversation between you and your friends (which is objectively odd) OR b) you are making this up and trying to justify this gift. 

    Also, it's not like your only options for BM gifts are customized tumblers or jewelry. Use your imagination....give a coffee mug and specialty coffee to the coffee snob, a clutch and a scarf to the accessory lover, a Pandora One subscription to the music lover, a cutting board and nice knife to the chef, a mani gift certificate to the one who gets her nails done all the time......
    This. Exactly what Southern said. 

    Think of the great gifts you could get for them with the "hundreds" you're paying for their hair and makeup. Or are you giving them hair and makeup gift cards so they can get all done up whenever they want?

    Personally, I'd be a little salty if I were a BM in a wedding and the bride spent hundreds of dollars for me to look good for her pictures but then got me a much much less expensive gift thanking me for being in her wedding. 
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