Probably nosy, but....

WhatawagSBNy

pinkrevenge said:

WhatawagSBNy said:

It's a shame we can't write prescriptions for books and slapping parents in the face. A lot of both would go a long way.

You have my vote

NavyBlue143

For us it's like, once a month. In fact it's been 6 weeks at this point. I have a high sex drive, H has almost none. He has low T, but won't take treatments for it until we're TTC because they could make him sterile. He says he'd like me to initiate more, and I do try, but he's so damn oblivious. Last night for instance, I wore my silk lingerie HE picked out, with a v neck that dips practically to my navel, and cuddled up to him on the couch, he never looked up from his book. So I went to bed and waited up for him. Then I was kissing on him and he just turned over and kept reading. On our honeymoon it was a similar thing, except the TV instead of a book. 

It's been talked to death, and nothing has changed in two years. In fact it's only gotten worse. H has actually used the word nympho a few times, and that stung and just made me want to try even less. He and I have never even made out, he just won't do it. I've suggested a sex therapist, he doesn't think we need one. After all the other issues we've had, and overcome, it kills me that this might be what breaks up our marriage, but I can't live like this. I've never had an issue of feeling rejected in a relationship before, not sexually anyway, and I just don't know what else to do. I know he adores me, he shows it in every other way, and that should be enough. But I'm 26, looking at 40+ years of near sexless marriage, and not sure if I'm up for it. 

JaniV123

depends, hence why I answered other. Sometimes its several times a week, and other times we can go a week or two or more without. Depends on so many things for us. Mostly its once a week. 

theartistformerlyknownas

NavyBlue143 said:

For us it's like, once a month. In fact it's been 6 weeks at this point. I have a high sex drive, H has almost none. He has low T, but won't take treatments for it until we're TTC because they could make him sterile. He says he'd like me to initiate more, and I do try, but he's so damn oblivious. Last night for instance, I wore my silk lingerie HE picked out, with a v neck that dips practically to my navel, and cuddled up to him on the couch, he never looked up from his book. So I went to bed and waited up for him. Then I was kissing on him and he just turned over and kept reading. On our honeymoon it was a similar thing, except the TV instead of a book. 

It's been talked to death, and nothing has changed in two years. In fact it's only gotten worse. H has actually used the word nympho a few times, and that stung and just made me want to try even less. He and I have never even made out, he just won't do it. I've suggested a sex therapist, he doesn't think we need one. After all the other issues we've had, and overcome, it kills me that this might be what breaks up our marriage, but I can't live like this. I've never had an issue of feeling rejected in a relationship before, not sexually anyway, and I just don't know what else to do. I know he adores me, he shows it in every other way, and that should be enough. But I'm 26, looking at 40+ years of near sexless marriage, and not sure if I'm up for it. 

I'm so, so sorry @NavyBlue143. Hoping you guys can find some way past this.

JCbride2015

NavyBlue143 said:

For us it's like, once a month. In fact it's been 6 weeks at this point. I have a high sex drive, H has almost none. He has low T, but won't take treatments for it until we're TTC because they could make him sterile. He says he'd like me to initiate more, and I do try, but he's so damn oblivious. Last night for instance, I wore my silk lingerie HE picked out, with a v neck that dips practically to my navel, and cuddled up to him on the couch, he never looked up from his book. So I went to bed and waited up for him. Then I was kissing on him and he just turned over and kept reading. On our honeymoon it was a similar thing, except the TV instead of a book. 

It's been talked to death, and nothing has changed in two years. In fact it's only gotten worse. H has actually used the word nympho a few times, and that stung and just made me want to try even less. He and I have never even made out, he just won't do it. I've suggested a sex therapist, he doesn't think we need one. After all the other issues we've had, and overcome, it kills me that this might be what breaks up our marriage, but I can't live like this. I've never had an issue of feeling rejected in a relationship before, not sexually anyway, and I just don't know what else to do. I know he adores me, he shows it in every other way, and that should be enough. But I'm 26, looking at 40+ years of near sexless marriage, and not sure if I'm up for it. 

I'm so sorry you're dealing with this.  I hope you two can communicate and work through it.  (((hugs)))

flyingfoxes

We average 2-3X per week.  I'm sure FI would love even more, and sometimes it is more, but on average 2-3 is pretty decent for us.

amelisha

I didn't mean to imply that people who've had only one partner have any lack of skill!

...just that all my hooring around was kinda experimental. Not a skills-based argument at all I was such a wild child in the past that the "have you tried lube/other positions?" was irresistibly hilarious to me because I have gone along with some pretty straight-up weird stuff and comparatively it just seemed funny. Like, "no, I've never been on top but I did go home with a couple who wanted me to punch the guy in the face during, so..."

Sleeping around didn't make me any better at it but it sure did show me that a lot of people are into stuff I didn't even know was something people were into, hahaha.

JennyColada

amelisha said:

I was such a wild child in the past that the "have you tried lube/other positions?" was irresistibly hilarious to me because I have gone along with some pretty straight-up weird stuff and comparatively it just seemed funny. Like, "no, I've never been on top but I did go home with a couple who wanted me to punch the guy in the face during, so..."

Haha. I get you on that.

I get great humor in reading the "sex tips" from various magazines because I'm just sitting there like "what do you mean this is a way to spice up your sex life once in a while?! That stuff is what we do every time!"

Or with the Fifty Shades of Abusive Relationships! All my friends are talking about "BDSM" and I just kind of am shocked at 1. How little they actually know 2. How vanilla most of the stuff they think is "out there"!

[Deleted User]

princessofgenovia

We probably average I dunno 5-7 times a week. I've never really counted but if I think about it...that sounds right-ish.

I've always had a super high sex drive. But if FI doesn't want to/isn't interested, I have no problem taking care of myself...myself. Sometimes I just need to get off. 

I had an ex who was really intimidated by my sex drive. And would actually get mad when I masturbated because he felt that I should only get off with him. But his sex drive was drastically lower then mine. But according to him men should have the higher sex drive so there was clearly something wrong with me. Yes, there was. I was dating him. I fixed that very quickly.

chibiyui

pinkrevenge said:

I think it's all about education and if you were raised for sex to be shameful or not. A lot of people in college thought I MUST be a slut, and a few in high school too (and boy do I hate that term) by virtue of being informed and unashamed to talk about sexual things.
I would bet if I put it up for a poll on how many partners people thought I had, most would guess higher than the real number. But that's just me not allowing my body and my normal, healthy sex life to shame me.

And yes, it does infuriate me when teens are left in the dark on purpose. Because if we tell them sex exists they'll go out and just start rubbing themselves on anything that breathes. Please.

No lie, I was just talking with my same age coworker yesterday and she thought 12/13 year old girls getting the HPV vaccine will turn them into sluts. Because it takes away consequences or something.

I was stunned.

cupcait927

chibiyui said:

I think it's all about education and if you were raised for sex to be shameful or not. A lot of people in college thought I MUST be a slut, and a few in high school too (and boy do I hate that term) by virtue of being informed and unashamed to talk about sexual things.
I would bet if I put it up for a poll on how many partners people thought I had, most would guess higher than the real number. But that's just me not allowing my body and my normal, healthy sex life to shame me.

And yes, it does infuriate me when teens are left in the dark on purpose. Because if we tell them sex exists they'll go out and just start rubbing themselves on anything that breathes. Please.

No lie, I was just talking with my same age coworker yesterday and she thought 12/13 year old girls getting the HPV vaccine will turn them into sluts. Because it takes away consequences or something. I was stunned.

WUT.

WhatawagSBNy

Help me out. What does WUT mean? 2nd time I've seen it.
And what does bean dipped mean?

princessofgenovia

WhatawagSBNy said:

Help me out. What does WUT mean? 2nd time I've seen it. And what does bean dipped mean?

WUT means...what? Like...say it out loud, kind of that shocked dumbfounded what the fuck are you talking about what. 

Bean dipped is to change the subject. Like if someone is saying "You really should wear more make up" you go "That's interesting, have you tried the bean dip?" and of course "bean dip" can be any non-controversial subject. 

amelisha

I believe "bean dip" was an Ann Landers or Dear Abby thing, something like that, originally. It's now just shorthand for changing the subject to something innocuous...although I don't know anyone who still makes bean dip for parties, haha.

levioosa

 

cupcait927 said:

chibiyui said:

I think it's all about education and if you were raised for sex to be shameful or not. A lot of people in college thought I MUST be a slut, and a few in high school too (and boy do I hate that term) by virtue of being informed and unashamed to talk about sexual things.
I would bet if I put it up for a poll on how many partners people thought I had, most would guess higher than the real number. But that's just me not allowing my body and my normal, healthy sex life to shame me.

And yes, it does infuriate me when teens are left in the dark on purpose. Because if we tell them sex exists they'll go out and just start rubbing themselves on anything that breathes. Please.

No lie, I was just talking with my same age coworker yesterday and she thought 12/13 year old girls getting the HPV vaccine will turn them into sluts. Because it takes away consequences or something. I was stunned.

WUT.

So stupid.  My coworker won't let her daughter take the pill to help with her horrible periods because she thinks it will be giving her permission to have sex (spoiler alert: a teenager is going to figure out a way to do it if they want to with or without your permission). 

My Mom put me on the pill when I was 14 because I had such terrible periods.  She had them too and when mine got really bad she said "nope" and took me to the gyno.  I am so glad she didn't think like my coworker.  Honestly, I probably would have just gone to planned parenthood after school one day and gotten them for myself had she told me that she would rather see me in pain over being on a contraceptive. 

beethery

levioosa said:

 

cupcait927 said:

chibiyui said:

I think it's all about education and if you were raised for sex to be shameful or not. A lot of people in college thought I MUST be a slut, and a few in high school too (and boy do I hate that term) by virtue of being informed and unashamed to talk about sexual things.
I would bet if I put it up for a poll on how many partners people thought I had, most would guess higher than the real number. But that's just me not allowing my body and my normal, healthy sex life to shame me.

And yes, it does infuriate me when teens are left in the dark on purpose. Because if we tell them sex exists they'll go out and just start rubbing themselves on anything that breathes. Please.

No lie, I was just talking with my same age coworker yesterday and she thought 12/13 year old girls getting the HPV vaccine will turn them into sluts. Because it takes away consequences or something. I was stunned.

WUT.

So stupid.  My coworker won't let her daughter take the pill to help with her horrible periods because she thinks it will be giving her permission to have sex (spoiler alert: a teenager is going to figure out a way to do it if they want to with or without your permission). 

My Mom put me on the pill when I was 14 because I had such terrible periods.  She had them too and when mine got really bad she said "nope" and took me to the gyno.  I am so glad she didn't think like my coworker.  Honestly, I probably would have just gone to planned parenthood after school one day and gotten them for myself had she told me that she would rather see me in pain over being on a contraceptive. 

On the way to the drug store from the dermatologist's office when I was 18, my mother looked me dead in the eye and told me she wanted me to know that this was not permission to have sex with anyone.

I was so far from being a virgin by that point that I couldn't even eyeball it in the distance anymore and it was very difficult not to laugh in her face.

tcnoble

pinkrevenge said:

JennyColada said:

I was such a wild child in the past that the "have you tried lube/other positions?" was irresistibly hilarious to me because I have gone along with some pretty straight-up weird stuff and comparatively it just seemed funny. Like, "no, I've never been on top but I did go home with a couple who wanted me to punch the guy in the face during, so..."

Haha. I get you on that. I get great humor in reading the "sex tips" from various magazines because I'm just sitting there like "what do you mean this is a way to spice up your sex life once in a while?! That stuff is what we do every time!" Or with the Fifty Shades of Abusive Relationships! All my friends are talking about "BDSM" and I just kind of am shocked at 1. How little they actually know 2. How vanilla most of the stuff they think is "out there"!

"Have you guys heard of these balls you put in your cooch?! Like in 50 shades?!"

Ben wa balls have only existed for hundreds to thousands of years and aren't even that interesting in terms of sexual toys, but no, this is a new concept for me. Please go on.

HAHAHA speaking of these. A girlfriend and I had read the books at the same time and were talking about them. FI and gf's DH were talking about apparently looked in to the line of 50 Shades sex stuff that was released. FI bought those ben wa balls. Personally, they did NOTHING for me. Certainly not like the book made them do for Ana. I was not super impressed.

[Deleted User]

[Deleted User]

WhatawagSBNy

A friend, Debbie's mother went on the pill for medical reasons not related to conception but to menopause.

She told her three daughters at the dinner table they should not take it as a sign it was okay to take birth control, because it would lead to. Sin blah blah.

She said she had made an agreement with the doctor long ago, and he would call her if they ever even asked about it. Friend was youngest at 17 and thought yikes. Then her oldest sister at 21 said, well that's okay Mom, neither my Dr. or Lynne's is a rat, so Debbie can go through us when she is ready to go on the pill too.
Her mother choked on her chicken.
Parents who are outrageously repressive just teach their children not to tell the truth.

princessofgenovia

levioosa said:

 

cupcait927 said:

chibiyui said:

I think it's all about education and if you were raised for sex to be shameful or not. A lot of people in college thought I MUST be a slut, and a few in high school too (and boy do I hate that term) by virtue of being informed and unashamed to talk about sexual things.
I would bet if I put it up for a poll on how many partners people thought I had, most would guess higher than the real number. But that's just me not allowing my body and my normal, healthy sex life to shame me.

And yes, it does infuriate me when teens are left in the dark on purpose. Because if we tell them sex exists they'll go out and just start rubbing themselves on anything that breathes. Please.

No lie, I was just talking with my same age coworker yesterday and she thought 12/13 year old girls getting the HPV vaccine will turn them into sluts. Because it takes away consequences or something. I was stunned.

WUT.

So stupid.  My coworker won't let her daughter take the pill to help with her horrible periods because she thinks it will be giving her permission to have sex (spoiler alert: a teenager is going to figure out a way to do it if they want to with or without your permission). 

My Mom put me on the pill when I was 14 because I had such terrible periods.  She had them too and when mine got really bad she said "nope" and took me to the gyno.  I am so glad she didn't think like my coworker.  Honestly, I probably would have just gone to planned parenthood after school one day and gotten them for myself had she told me that she would rather see me in pain over being on a contraceptive. 

My mom put me on BC at 14 for my acne. And also for stopping our family tradition of having babies before being legally able to vote. My mother was very realistic. I was probably going to have sex as a teenager. If I was on the pill though, I probably wouldn't have a pregnancy as a teenager. She also provided me with condoms and lectures about STD testing. 

When I hear stories from my friends about their parents not allowing them to get the pill, to stop them from having sex (it never ever worked, they just had unsafe sex), I just want to send my mom gift baskets to thank her.

charlottesmom0626

When I was 16 I went to planned parenthood to get the pill. when I was 17 or 18 my mom found my birth control snooping in my room. She called planned parenthood asking about it. When they told her it was confidential, she started yelling at the woman on the phone. When I got home she said "I FOUND YOUR PILLS" ...so? To this day I don't know why she was mad about it. Did you really want a pregnant teenager?

levioosa

princessofgenovia said:

levioosa said:

 

cupcait927 said:

chibiyui said:

I think it's all about education and if you were raised for sex to be shameful or not. A lot of people in college thought I MUST be a slut, and a few in high school too (and boy do I hate that term) by virtue of being informed and unashamed to talk about sexual things.
I would bet if I put it up for a poll on how many partners people thought I had, most would guess higher than the real number. But that's just me not allowing my body and my normal, healthy sex life to shame me.

And yes, it does infuriate me when teens are left in the dark on purpose. Because if we tell them sex exists they'll go out and just start rubbing themselves on anything that breathes. Please.

No lie, I was just talking with my same age coworker yesterday and she thought 12/13 year old girls getting the HPV vaccine will turn them into sluts. Because it takes away consequences or something. I was stunned.

WUT.

So stupid.  My coworker won't let her daughter take the pill to help with her horrible periods because she thinks it will be giving her permission to have sex (spoiler alert: a teenager is going to figure out a way to do it if they want to with or without your permission). 

My Mom put me on the pill when I was 14 because I had such terrible periods.  She had them too and when mine got really bad she said "nope" and took me to the gyno.  I am so glad she didn't think like my coworker.  Honestly, I probably would have just gone to planned parenthood after school one day and gotten them for myself had she told me that she would rather see me in pain over being on a contraceptive. 

My mom put me on BC at 14 for my acne. And also for stopping our family tradition of having babies before being legally able to vote. My mother was very realistic. I was probably going to have sex as a teenager. If I was on the pill though, I probably wouldn't have a pregnancy as a teenager. She also provided me with condoms and lectures about STD testing. 

When I hear stories from my friends about their parents not allowing them to get the pill, to stop them from having sex (it never ever worked, they just had unsafe sex), I just want to send my mom gift baskets to thank her.

I just don't understand the logic.  Like...have these parents ever met teenagers?  I didn't have sex until my twenties, but when I did it wasn't because I had magic permission all of a sudden.  My parents just assumed I was having sex despite what I told them.  I think after they walked in on my brother having sex as a teenager they just figured the ship for virginity had sailed for both of us. 

KatieinBkln

mrsk616 said:

levioosa said:

So....since we're TMI-ing it anyways....

Any other good recommendations for lube besides the two mentioned?  My problem with lube (cheapo  lube) is that when I use it I get yeast and urinary tract infections (sorry, TMI).  KY doesn't seem to cause as many problems, but I still try to avoid it. Coconut oil works pretty well too, but it stains my sheets. 

we use pure romance whipped collection, i love it no issues for me. and it doubles as a lotion (how its made i guess) a little pricey but i wont use anything else. oh and its also edible. 

we go at least one a week, once we move in together that might change because right now the house has no furniture so we do it when and where we can.

My favorite lube is his saliva. It's free AND fun!

lurkergirl

WhatawagSBNy said:

A friend, Debbie's mother went on the pill for medical reasons not related to conception but to menopause. She told her three daughters at the dinner table they should not take it as a sign it was okay to take birth control, because it would lead to. Sin blah blah. She said she had made an agreement with the doctor long ago, and he would call her if they ever even asked about it. Friend was youngest at 17 and thought yikes. Then her oldest sister at 21 said, well that's okay Mom, neither my Dr. or Lynne's is a rat, so Debbie can go through us when she is ready to go on the pill too. Her mother choked on her chicken. Parents who are outrageously repressive just teach their children not to tell the truth.

Are you velvethelicopters?

WhatawagSBNy

No and I have not read enough of her posts to know why you would ask. Tell me.

lurkergirl

WhatawagSBNy said:

No and I have not read enough of her posts to know why you would ask. Tell me.

Erratic and dramatic posts and similar avatars.

beethery

WhatawagSBNy said:

No and I have not read enough of her posts to know why you would ask. Tell me.

Because your posting style is kind of all over the place and a little MUDdy like hers.

levioosa

lurkergirl said:

WhatawagSBNy said:

A friend, Debbie's mother went on the pill for medical reasons not related to conception but to menopause. She told her three daughters at the dinner table they should not take it as a sign it was okay to take birth control, because it would lead to. Sin blah blah. She said she had made an agreement with the doctor long ago, and he would call her if they ever even asked about it. Friend was youngest at 17 and thought yikes. Then her oldest sister at 21 said, well that's okay Mom, neither my Dr. or Lynne's is a rat, so Debbie can go through us when she is ready to go on the pill too. Her mother choked on her chicken. Parents who are outrageously repressive just teach their children not to tell the truth.

Are you velvethelicopters?

I totally looked up a thread earlier because I thought they were the same person and something posted was contradictory.