Hi
I had been a lurker here for 6 months. I was married on 7-2-11. It was a wonderful day. I had a backyard wedding for both of our second marriages. I just wanted to say almost all the advice I was given was helpful and true. I was not here to make friends I needed information. Most of the women were very nice and informative, and I respect the fact they take the time to help brides like myself, although some were mean girls from high school. I just moved on and did not read them and felt bad when they trashed a girl for spelling or a silly question. I did not follow all etiquette rules, but I knew what I was doing and made peace with the fact it just had to be that way. We catered it ourselves, did not invite children. (I wanted to but we would have had 35 kids under 10 at a 120 adult reception). I wore a big ball gown with 3ft train and groom was in pants and a button down, and guests were in shorts. Our children stood with us but my three best friends threw me a shower, batch party, helped cook, and could have not done it without them. They did it with no recitation because they love me. Coupons and planning ahead saved me thousands. My area is very expensive, so I worked with what I had, could make, and or barter. For instance I wanted a cup cake tower they wanted $3.50-$5.00 for each cup cake. That was way out of my budget so I baked 100 cupcakes three different flavors including a chocolate cream cheese filled. Then had a cupcake night several bottles of wine my three best friends and told them to have fun and be creative. They came out great people wanted to know where I got them and the total cost was .75 each. Everyone was right the day flew by I was in the moment all day and only pictures show me what a truly wonderful day it was. I guess I wrote this to say. You know who you are, and who your family and friends are. You know what you want. If you have to have cash bar then do it. If you have to do pot luck your loved ones know the situation and will help. Just don’t get a $$$$ dress and $$$$$ flowers make sure you spend what money you have on your guest. Have a wonderful day. Do not spend money you do not have just to keeps up with someone else’s vision of a wedding. I know things went wrong, but I don’t think about it. I don’t bring them up. I just talk about the fun things that happen. So to anyone who is reading this. Good luck. Have fun!!! Think outside the box. And enjoy celebrating the love you share. Everything else is just accessories you can have or not have.
Best wishes to all
Bernice