Friday's just a day away

mrsconn23

DefConn has asked every day this week if we're 'staying home'.  He is a weekend kid. 

DH has to work this weekend.  Boo.  I have so much to do to get ready for DefConn's party.  I'm hoping it's nice enough to kick the kids outside or maybe the IL's will want them.  I could use a date with my H. 

I need to find my workout motivation.  I've been working out, but I feel like I'm just not into it. I need change it up or something.  

thejucheidea

We had a consultation with lactation yesterday. Soren apparently lifts the back of his tongue when he nurses, blocking himself from swallowing and also blocking a good number of milk ducts, thus affecting my supply. I'm now on fenugreek and goat's rue in an attempt to really up my supply for him, and when he nurses, I have to lay on my side with him draped over my side to latch so that gravity forces his tongue to hang. He gets one chance on each side then we do two rounds of him on the breast with a supplementation tube snaked into his mouth so that we can spur him to suckle when he stops. It just seems so weird to be using a syringe feeding system on an otherwise healthy infant.

Breastfeeding is hard .

mrsconn23

It is hard, Juche.  I'm glad you got some answers.  I hope that things even out for you soon.  

Heffalump

thejucheidea said:

Breastfeeding is hard .

Truth.  Our LC suggested the supplementation tube when we couldn't figure out what DD's deal was, but we didn't end up using it. 

I know you know this, but you'll get through it.  DH and I were just talking about the days of nursing and pumping, and how it felt like forever in the middle of it, but now looking back, it was really just a blip.  Hang in there, and do what you need to do to stay sane.  (I don't think people tell new moms this enough.  Maybe it's obvious, but I was so hell-bent on BF-ing that when it wasn't going well with DD, I was full of despair.) 

6fsn

Bf-ing is hard.  There is nothing wrong with saying "I'm done."

0Face

I've never heard anyone say "Oh, I loved it!  It was soooooo easy".  I heard more "I don't know why it didn't work!" stories than anything.  That being said---Juche---you're doing your best, and giving an awesome effort.  *backpats and milk vibes*

Today is more of the same "why are we at this job when we could make so much MORE doing something else?".  I'm hoping that by this time next week we're discussing this fvckery with our bonding company.  We need $$ to work, yo.

tawillers

::hugs Juche::

Happy Thursday!

I need to shop for workout pants.  The pair I have don't stay up.  I'd like to think that my little bit of weight loss is responsible (I can't see it physically), but I think they're just getting old. Maybe it's a combination of both.

mrsconn23

@tawillers, I bought some yoga crops at Kohl's.  I love them and want more. 

tawillers

mrs.conn23 said:

@tawillers, I bought some yoga crops at Kohl's.  I love them and want more. 

What brand?  I'll try some on when I'm out later.

6fsn

I just ordered some crap from Target.  I don't have high hopes because there stuff never seems to fit me right. 

I think I need to take some time and go to stores for a few summer stuff.  I don't want to.

mrsconn23

tawillers said:

mrs.conn23 said:

@tawillers, I bought some yoga crops at Kohl's.  I love them and want more. 

What brand?  I'll try some on when I'm out later.

I had to go look.

Tek Gear. 

tawillers

mrs.conn23 said:

tawillers said:

mrs.conn23 said:

@tawillers, I bought some yoga crops at Kohl's.  I love them and want more. 

What brand?  I'll try some on when I'm out later.

I had to go look.

Tek Gear. 

Thanks!  I appreciate the recommendation and will check them out later today.

AuntFlo

ftrMrs0 said:

I've never heard anyone say "Oh, I loved it!  It was soooooo easy".  I heard more "I don't know why it didn't work!" stories than anything.  That being said---Juche---you're doing your best, and giving an awesome effort.  *backpats and milk vibes*

See, now I've only ever heard great things about it (besides on here) and feel like people should talk more about how much it sucks.  It bottles my mind that the human race has survived this long with how long it takes for milk to come in, how hard milk production can be for some people, and how some kids take a long time to learn how to do it or don't do it at all.  Bah.  BFing was the single most stressful thing about having a baby.

mrsconn23

@AuntFlo, I think I've noticed an influx of articles/blog posts/op eds about how hard BFing is in the last year or two.  Definitely, not much before that.  I wish more of it had been around (or more highly visible) when DefConn was teeny/when I was pregnant.  

0Face

My friends/family must be way more candid and realistic about the trials of BF'ing especially in early days.  Mastitis, chapped nipples and all.  Yowza.

mrsconn23

OH and on babbies/pregnancy stuff...SIL/BFF is having an IUI today.  She had surgery in Jan to clear out endometriosis.  I'm crossing all the crossables this works.  She's getting worn out by the process and all the stuff she has to do.  We talked about it a lot when she was last in town.  She's got a good attitude, but it's wearing on her emotions. 

GBCK

My BFing experience was, overall, pretty easy.
Which doesn't mean it didn't suck at times--there were days with tears and clogged ducts and thrush and "ahhh, supply" panics.  I know I posted about feeling like a pacifier and such.

But, overall, I never had bleeding nipples or lack of weight gain or anything.  And pumping wasn't that bad.

BUT, that doesn't make it not hard at some points.  I do think it gets easier.  First week home from the hospital?  scary as hell.  First week back at work?  extra scary.
But around 8-10 weeks, it got easier/we got in a grove.  Then it got easier at about 4 months.  then about 10 months.  etc.

In spite of my experience being pretty easy, I've no problem with saying that there are far bigger things to worry about than just BFing.  Do what you do, but deciding to not continue to BF isn't even a blip on the 'things moms should feel guilty about' radar.

PMeg819

Ugh breastfeeding. I failed with DS and it just ate me up inside for a long time. With DD I saw the LC the day after we were discharged because the hospital LC was useless. We got the hang of it eventually, but I never loved it. I loved the convenience of it, but when my supply dropped when she was 11 months, there was no sadness.

Ditto on the Tek Gear pants. I bought a pair recently and I'm pretty happy.

I was supposed to go to the gym this morning but I fell asleep at 3 am. When the alarm went off at 5:30, I looked at it and fell back asleep then woke up a hour later to it going off in my face. Totally missed the class. The kids are home today and tomorrow and I'm trying to work. It's not happening. DD is driving me up the wall and its not even 10 am. She has a strange obsession with the dog food and water dishes. Thankfully, DS is content playing Legos all day. It just reaffirms me that I am not SAHM material.

*Barbie*

I wasn't allowed to even try BF until my kid was a week + old since she was a preemie. She was in the NICU, so they were giving her whatever I could manage to pump (it took a while to come in - probably a good 5 days to get more than a few mL) and supplementing with Similac as needed. By the time she was discharged from the NICU (12 days) I had a decent supply from pumping ~30 minutes every 2 hours and taking fenugreek, she was able to stop with the formula.  

It took us a good 3-4 weeks at home to get into a rhythm where I could breastfeed her comfortably (and even then would generally pump the other side at the same time. ) Even when we got into a good place with the BF, I still would pump during the night sessions while DK gave her a bottle of pumped milk. It worked well for us, and that way we could all be back in bed after ~20 minutes. I stopped BF totally around 6 mo because she was getting teeth/bitey, and it was only 1x a day at that point, anyways. 

I was fortunate that my production was good, so she was able to get breastmilk well beyond the 1 year mark. (I stopped when she was 18 mo and had a hell of a time drying up. Ouch.)

Do the best you can, but don't let it stress you too much. If you're adamant about the breast milk, but are not having luck with the latch, consider pumping. Breastfeeding can be hard and painful (ever have a nipple blister? if not, you don't want to) - there's benefits to you and the baby - but you need to consider if they outweigh the negatives (pain, stress, etc.).

thejucheidea

I have a rented Symphony pump and have been pumping regularly, but I never manage more than a combined 1.5 oz and we're already a week postpartum.

*Barbie*

thejucheidea said:

I have a rented Symphony pump and have been pumping regularly, but I never manage more than a combined 1.5 oz and we're already a week postpartum.

you're probably fine given it's only been a week - I think that's all I was getting at that point . :-) (especially if that's on top of BF)

how often do they have you pumping/feeding? for how long?

i was pumping for 30 minutes every 2ish hours (so really start pumping at 12, stop at 12:30, start at 2, stop at 2:30).

once we brought her home from the NICU, i was also pumping one breast while BF from the other, and then switching after ~20 minutes. 

Both of those were at recommendation of LC and NICU nurses at our hospital. 

You also want to make sure you have the right size breast shields on your pump - it will make a difference with regards to comfort and production (at least it did in my case.)

mrsconn23

Random pumping thought, I always thought my nips looked like something out of a SciFi movie when I pumped.  It was fascinating to watch them.  I also loved seeing the initial whoosh of milk when I started.  

You're doing great, Juche.  

I remember the first few weeks were so much work with what felt like no payoff.  All he did was eat, sleep, shit, and cry and I was exhausted and a little on the anxious/paranoid side. I felt like the goal of my life was for him not to cry.  I found my groove right around the time he started smiling/reacting to me/us.  We're here for you. 

GBCK

Please ignore all of this if it's not helpful--because sometimes more help can be all "Of COURSE I kow this crap, you guys aren't letting me deal w/ this, quit offering stupid suggestions argle bargle" is a very reasonable stage when it comes to suggestions on these things.

I pumped oodles, but the first few weeks, there was definitely a "how the hell am I ever going to go back to work?  I have like 1 feeding's worth of milk?  it's like 2 oz!" thing going on.  I found that it took a few weeks in until pumping was actually very productive (and even then, getting ready to go back to work, I was all "There is 1.5 day's worth of milk here!" and it took rational people reminding me that I was pumping while at work, there only had to be 1 days worth for right now" to get my claws out of the ceiling.)

If you're not doing compression while pumping, I'd recommend 'em.  I found they really made a difference.  Pumping both at once tends to get more than doing them one at a time.  People will tell you to nurse and pump at the same time and that does also help--but I found it to be a PITA and more than once baby feet made me spill it...so it's kinda evil that way.

But it does sound like you're doing great

GBCK

Other topic, on my day off tomorrow, I have meeting, second meeting, feed kids who are in for an event, possibly another meeting, then fill tiny vials with chemicals.

Last night was kindergarten roundup.  I think she's starting in Sept, depending on maturity in the next 6 months.

Heffalump

thejucheidea said:

I have a rented Symphony pump and have been pumping regularly, but I never manage more than a combined 1.5 oz and we're already a week postpartum.

I think that's about where I was, too.  I freaked the fuck out with DD, but by DS, it was like "Fine, crack open the formula" and we supplemented for a couple weeks until my supply caught up with his appetite.  I remember both times thinking it was taking way longer to get a decent supply than I thought it should.

hmonkey

@thejucheidea

1.5 oz for a week old baby is a lot. that's about max capacity for a one week old, so you are doing great.

http://kellymom.com/bf/pumpingmoms/pumping/milkcalc/

yeah, everything about breastfeeding was lies. every time i heard people talk about letdown being a "tingling" sensation, i wanted to stab someone. it always felt like knives were stabbing my boobs.

Heffalump

hmonkey said:

@thejucheidea

1.5 oz for a week old baby is a lot. that's about max capacity for a one week old, so you are doing great.

http://kellymom.com/bf/pumpingmoms/pumping/milkcalc/

yeah, everything about breastfeeding was lies. every time i heard people talk about letdown being a "tingling" sensation, i wanted to stab someone. it always felt like knives were stabbing my boobs.

I never felt anything at all.  (Please don't stab me.  TIA.)

mrsconn23

Heffalump said:

hmonkey said:

I never felt anything at all.  (Please don't stab me.  TIA.)

Same

6fsn

mrs.conn23 said:

Heffalump said:

hmonkey said:

I never felt anything at all.  (Please don't stab me.  TIA.)

Same

Same.  I was secretly relieved I had all the gallbladder issues so I had a reason to quit pumping. 

thejucheidea

GBCK said:

Please ignore all of this if it's not helpful--because sometimes more help can be all "Of COURSE I kow this crap, you guys aren't letting me deal w/ this, quit offering stupid suggestions argle bargle" is a very reasonable stage when it comes to suggestions on these things.

I pumped oodles, but the first few weeks, there was definitely a "how the hell am I ever going to go back to work?  I have like 1 feeding's worth of milk?  it's like 2 oz!" thing going on.  I found that it took a few weeks in until pumping was actually very productive (and even then, getting ready to go back to work, I was all "There is 1.5 day's worth of milk here!" and it took rational people reminding me that I was pumping while at work, there only had to be 1 days worth for right now" to get my claws out of the ceiling.)

If you're not doing compression while pumping, I'd recommend 'em.  I found they really made a difference.  Pumping both at once tends to get more than doing them one at a time.  People will tell you to nurse and pump at the same time and that does also help--but I found it to be a PITA and more than once baby feet made me spill it...so it's kinda evil that way.

But it does sound like you're doing great

No, I love the support. My family is extremely supportive, but back when I was a baby, my mom had the exact same thing happen with me (I lost a lot of weight and at the first pediatrician appointment, they said that she had to put me on formula), but instead of the pediatrician ordering a lactation referral, they just told her she was SOL and that I was a formula baby now. She understands why I'm sad but doesn't know how to help because she wasn't given a choice.

I'm just constantly afraid that he's still not getting enough. I've started pumping once in the morning and once at night at feeding time to see just how much he's getting at meal times and adjusting the formula supplementation based on that to help quell my mind, but having him lose like 15% of his birth weight by five days was fucking terrifying to me. Every time he cries after feeding, I'm like 'oh god I'm starving him again'. I think it will keep getting better each time that he has a good pediatrician appointment with weight gain, but now it's just pure terror.

I also am supposed to pump an hour after he eats, but the last couple of days, he wants to suckle an hour after he eats and does enough of a job that I can't hand express anything. When I do pump, I do compressions and break the seal every several minutes to hand express to make sure we still need to be attached. I'm taking fenugreek, goat's rue, Mother's Milk tea and eating the bejeezus out of lactation cookies my mom made that have oatmeal and brewer's yeast in them. I've upped my dairy and fruit intake per the pediatrician because she's afraid that the combination of goat's rue and fenugreek may make both of us hypoglycemic but fully supports taking these supplements to help with supply. I'm trying to continue my normal three liters of water a day as well.

It's just a lot of exhaustion and disappointment whenever I don't pump like a magical five ounces or something.

6fsn

All of my kids lost more than 10% of their initial body weight and eventually bounced back.  The only time I got more than 5 oz was when I was back at work and not nursing at all during the day.  YOU ARE DOING GREAT.