Confessions

KatWAG

Are there things that everyone seems to know or understand, but you are clueless about?

Up until yesterday I though the saying was "for all intensive purposes" but its actually "for all intents and purposes." Oops.

I have also been putting bobby pins in my hair the wrong way forever.

What about you?

sarawifenow

I cannot figure out plastic wrap. Every time I use it it ends up in a big plasticky ball of doom. H is in charge of the plastic wrap.

plainjane0415

The Diva Cup.  Even with all the threads here recently, I'm still lost.

loveislouder

Instagram. I just can't do it.

larrygaga

I consider myself pretty excellent with makeup. I can contour and apply eyeliner perfectly on the first try. Nothing makeup wise trips me up. Except


I have no idea how to wear blush or even what color to pick. I always had naturally rosy cheeks but it's fading as I get older and now I'm finding that I need some blush.

theartistformerlyknownas

I can't mentally wrap my brain around how to drive a stick shift.

hellosweetie1015

I have been told I'm a "people person" and so friendly. Several times, by several people.

I FUCKING HATE PEOPLE. Like, my IRL people are as follows: 

FI

My mom

My sisters

My brother

My BFF

My dad

My grandmothers

A few other friends (less than 10 people easy). 

If you aren't one of those people, chances are:

 

novella1186

taxes. Sometimes I feel like a stupid 1950s housewife. I don't know a damn thing about taxes and the more I try to learn, the more I get confused and stay far away from that mess. My dad's tax pro has been taking care of my taxes since I was old enough to get my first job. 

littlepep

novella1186 said:

taxes. Sometimes I feel like a stupid 1950s housewife. I don't know a damn thing about taxes and the more I try to learn, the more I get confused and stay far away from that mess. My dad's tax pro has been taking care of my taxes since I was old enough to get my first job. 

This. And 401Ks/investments. And math in general. 

Once a math teacher in college told me that he didn't know how to help me because he legitimately didn't understand what I was doing and where I had gotten formulas from. 

dolewhipper

I don't understand the first thing about buying a house. I tried reading about what you should do first, mortgages, and all the different kinds of loans and there's so much conflicting info out there, I just threw my hands up in the air

ETF: tired is not tried. though it may allude to the fact that I am tired.

hellohkb

lolo883 said:

I can't mentally wrap my brain around how to drive a stick shift.

This! FH's family all love stick shifts and only drive them so he's tried to teach me on several occasions. No matter how much patience FH grants me, I can't figure it out.

kvruns

can openers.  I don't know why but I just can't do them.  The one we have now is a pampered chef and I can get it about 75% of the time which is a vast improvement over years past.

kvruns

KatWAG said:

Are there things that everyone seems to know or understand, but you are clueless about?

Up until yesterday I though the saying was "for all intensive purposes" but its actually "for all intents and purposes." Oops.

I have also been putting bobby pins in my hair the wrong way forever.

What about you?

ummmm what is the right way to put in bobby pins?  I assume if they stay that means I did it right?

littlepep

kvruns said:

can openers.  I don't know why but I just can't do them.  The one we have now is a pampered chef and I can get it about 75% of the time which is a vast improvement over years past.

Along these lines, I can never get the hang of those electric wine openers. I always manage to screw it up. I'll stick to my bar key one. 

redoryx

Pets. Well, not so much pets themselves so much as people who don't have them.

kvruns

littlepep said:

kvruns said:

can openers.  I don't know why but I just can't do them.  The one we have now is a pampered chef and I can get it about 75% of the time which is a vast improvement over years past.

Along these lines, I can never get the hang of those electric wine openers. I always manage to screw it up. I'll stick to my bar key one.

I got one of the electric ones bc I sucked at the manual ones!  I don't drink a lot of wine but I get so excited to use it whenever I do bc it's fun. we have happy hours at work and I wanted some wine one time and had to wait for someone else to open it bc I didn't want to look silly not being able to open it

afox007

Rice and eggs. I am pretty damn awesome in the kitchen and for some reason cooking rice or eggs is almost always a failure. It cracks FI up I will spend hours in the kitchen making homemade Chinese food only to have to make a second pot of rice because I screwed up the first.

Eggs always end up wrong. Scrambled eggs are undercooked in spots, poached or over easy wind up over cooked. I give up!

KatieinBkln

littlepep said:

novella1186 said:

taxes. Sometimes I feel like a stupid 1950s housewife. I don't know a damn thing about taxes and the more I try to learn, the more I get confused and stay far away from that mess. My dad's tax pro has been taking care of my taxes since I was old enough to get my first job. 

This. And 401Ks/investments. And math in general. 

Once a math teacher in college told me that he didn't know how to help me because he legitimately didn't understand what I was doing and where I had gotten formulas from. 

Anything money-related that is more complicated than "Don't spend what you don't have."

Whenever anyone talks about investments my eyes glaze over. Partially I'm naturally conservative with my money. The idea of losing it in the market is too terrifying. I don't gamble at casinos; why would I gamble in the stock market, which, as far as I can tell, is run on the whims and fears of d-bag ex-frat boys who haven't matured much beyond those college years if their behavior at certain horrible bars is any indication?

But even if I could be convinced to invest in a risk-averse way, the moment someone starts talking about how it actually works? I check out. No matter how hard I try. My brain is physically determined to keep me poor. 

ShesSoCold

littlepep said:

novella1186 said:

taxes. Sometimes I feel like a stupid 1950s housewife. I don't know a damn thing about taxes and the more I try to learn, the more I get confused and stay far away from that mess. My dad's tax pro has been taking care of my taxes since I was old enough to get my first job. 

This. And 401Ks/investments. And math in general. 

Once a math teacher in college told me that he didn't know how to help me because he legitimately didn't understand what I was doing and where I had gotten formulas from. 

Investments and financial planning for me too, definitely. I recently received an inheritance and luckily we have a trusted family friend who is a financial planner because I went in there and said, "I have X dollars. I want to do this and this. That is literally all I know." and he worked everything out for me. I don't even know what type of account some of that money is in. 

I've thought about going rogue grandma and storing large amounts of cash in my mattress.

KatWAG

kvruns said:

KatWAG said:

Are there things that everyone seems to know or understand, but you are clueless about?

Up until yesterday I though the saying was "for all intensive purposes" but its actually "for all intents and purposes." Oops.

I have also been putting bobby pins in my hair the wrong way forever.

What about you?

ummmm what is the right way to put in bobby pins?  I assume if they stay that means I did it right?

The correct way is with the bumpy side down, closest to your head. I guess it holds hair better that way.

ETA:

littlepep

KatieinBkln said:

littlepep said:

novella1186 said:

taxes. Sometimes I feel like a stupid 1950s housewife. I don't know a damn thing about taxes and the more I try to learn, the more I get confused and stay far away from that mess. My dad's tax pro has been taking care of my taxes since I was old enough to get my first job. 

This. And 401Ks/investments. And math in general. 

Once a math teacher in college told me that he didn't know how to help me because he legitimately didn't understand what I was doing and where I had gotten formulas from. 

Anything money-related that is more complicated than "Don't spend what you don't have."

Whenever anyone talks about investments my eyes glaze over. Partially I'm naturally conservative with my money. The idea of losing it in the market is too terrifying. I don't gamble at casinos; why would I gamble in the stock market, which, as far as I can tell, is run on the whims and fears of d-bag ex-frat boys who haven't matured much beyond those college years if their behavior at certain horrible bars is any indication?

But even if I could be convinced to invest in a risk-averse way, the moment someone starts talking about how it actually works? I check out. No matter how hard I try. My brain is physically determined to keep me poor. 

One of my good friends works at the same place as me. I had him talk to FI about my 401K. I just couldn't wrap my head around what was the right thing to choose. 

cupcait927

I know pretty much zero about makeup. I mean, I wear it (just foundation/mascara/eyeliner/sometimes eyeshadow) but I know fuck all about contouring, highlighting, what brushes to use when, etc....I pretty much just slap some stuff on and hope it looks okay. I've tried watching youtube videos and asking friends how they do it and I still can't get it.

classicalandedgy

lolo883 said:

I can't mentally wrap my brain around how to drive a stick shift.

This...can't do it... or ride a bike SMH I know it's shameful.

levioosa

Breakfast.  I'm a pretty good cook, but for some reason I just cannot figure it out.  I have no idea what I do wrong.  Maybe it's just too close to baking sometimes.  My Dad makes the perfect pancakes.  I did not inherit his boss pancake making skills. I also didn't inherit his math skills or his love of DIY. 

KatWAG

classicalandedgy said:

lolo883 said:

I can't mentally wrap my brain around how to drive a stick shift.

This...can't do it... or ride a bike SMH I know it's shameful.

Strangely enough, no one will let me borrow their car to try and figure out stick shift

loveislouder

classicalandedgy said:

lolo883 said:

I can't mentally wrap my brain around how to drive a stick shift.

This...can't do it... or ride a bike SMH I know it's shameful.

I can't get it either. I figure there must be some kind of formula to it, like shift up to one, to two, then to three, then back down to two, then down to one. But apparently I'm wrong and you can jump around from one to tree to neutral. I don't get it.

flutteringinfl

I can't whistle or snap my fingers. Many people have tried to show me. They insist that both tasks are the easiest thing in the world. They are all liars.

sarahufl

I had no idea your Fallopian Tubes weren't connected to your Ovaries until about 2 weeks ago. Blew my mind.

I also don't understand taxes on stock sales. H sold a bunch of stocks for the down payment on our house and has been trying to explain the tax law to me for the past few days and there is nothing about it that I understand.

ElcaB

@levioosa, I hear you. I can make amazing scrambled eggs, hashes, and breakfast casseroles. Even pastries. But when it comes to pancakes and omelets, I'm like:

For me, it's unions. I mean, I get the general idea, but whenever people are all like, "UNIONSUNIONSUNIONS" I'm like, 

jenna8984

I understand the stick shift, I just have a hard time finding that exact balancing spot between stalling and peeling out.
But I was also using bobby pins wrong until about 2 months ago.

My failure thing is baking. I can COOK amazing meals but I literally can't bake a muffin or cupcake to save my life. I always follow the directions and it always burns on the bottom. In every different oven in every different home/apartment.

theartistformerlyknownas

loveislouder said:

classicalandedgy said:

lolo883 said:

I can't mentally wrap my brain around how to drive a stick shift.

This...can't do it... or ride a bike SMH I know it's shameful.

I can't get it either. I figure there must be some kind of formula to it, like shift up to one, to two, then to three, then back down to two, then down to one. But apparently I'm wrong and you can jump around from one to tree to neutral. I don't get it.

I can't even get the whole clutch situation, and whether it's clutch and brake or clutch and gas and WHY DO YOU NEED SO MANY PEDALS GODDAMIT, YOUR CHOICES ARE GO AND STOP.

Also, I can cook a lot of things, and cook them well. Totally tooting my own horn. But I fuck up hard boiled eggs EVERY TIME. Biscuits, too.