Wedding 911

my venue just started receiving really bad yelp reviews!

I've already sent out invitations for the wedding, which is being held at a newish outdoor venue this October. (Yes, I knew I'd be taking a risk with booking a venue that was so new, however this venue blew the others out of the water and was significantly more affordable. I also booked the wedding 2 years out so I figured they'd have it down by then. )

Anyways fast forward 18 months. Their yelp page had more than one '1-star ' reviews which stated, in sum:
1. The music at the reception was so low, the guests couldn't even hear it (70 decibels max)
2. The owner kept running around with his decibel reader for all guests to see
3. The owner was seen and heard by guests telling at the DJ and threatening him he'd "shut down the wedding" if the music wasn't turned to 70 decibels.

I went back to my contract, and lo and behold , found in small print the clause about the 70 decibels. Who even knows what that really means?! I thought as a wedding venue that would be a reasonable level but after reading these yelp reviews... I'm now freaking out.

Invites are out. The entire wedding is planned and decorated around this venue. The hours I've spent with my wedding planner rotated around this venue. The rental agreements are signed with all my vendors. Hotel blocks are booked. Everything's just about done. ...

Music and dancing is really important to me and my guests. Is it too wild to cancel my contract with this venue at this point?!? I'm so upset.

Please, if you have any advice...

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Re: my venue just started receiving really bad yelp reviews!

  • RezIpsaRezIpsa member
    250 Love Its 100 Comments Name Dropper
    edited May 2015
    I looked it up, and 70 is about as loud as a hair dryer.

    Call your venue and ask to go out and listen to music in the space at 70db. If you are looking for nightclub level sound, it's probably too quiet but acoustics are weird.

    Then, if it is too quiet, you have to decide how important the sound level is to you, how much money you lose if you cancel, and whether you can get another space.

    The clause was clearly in your contract so you don't have any recourse to get back non refundable deposits.

    Lurkers, beware new venues and for god's sake read every line of every contract and don't sign until you understand and agree with every line.
    PrettyGirlLost
  • Why did you send out invitations already for an October wedding? For anyone lurking, that's not what you should do. Obviously that ship has sailed for OP, but that's way too early for invitations to go out.

    How much are you going to lose by canceling, OP? Is it worth it to you? You said this venue was significantly more affordable; can you afford to both lose your deposits and book somewhere new while still hosting everyone invited?
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    charcoalandblushMairePoppy
  • Thanks you guys for your replies.  (I have a crazy A list B list C list thing going on due to strict venue capacity limits so my wedding planner and I organized our invite distribution to accommodate that. I had a bit of a unique situation there.)

    Anyways, that aside, I looked up the Venue's Minor Use Permit, which states that the noise cannot exceed 75 decibels, 75 FEET from the speakers. 

    If he is measuring any closer, and with a cheapy decibel reader not provided by the county, would I have the right to say something?

    Few side notes:

    (1) The original contract I signed with the venue just says "must not exceed 70 dB." with no further clarification. 

    (2)  The County Noise Ordinance even has looser guidelines, stating that it must be read from the property's perimeter! The property is HUGE so I doubt 150+ dB would reach the perimeter! 

    I'm assuming the venue's Minor Use Permit would override the county noise ordinance (right?) but I'm just trying to understand my rights as a paying customer.  I'm no lawyer. I'd like to talk to the owner but gather information and insight first.

    From the yelp reviews, it seemed like he was measuring near the speaker of the DJ, not 75 feet from it.  The comments said the chatter of the 100 guests was louder than the music, which is part of why they couldn't even hear it.  That just seems unreasonable.  What are my rights if the owner comes over and measures closer than 75 feet of the speakers? Does he have this right?
  • Thanks you guys for your replies.  (I have a crazy A list B list C list thing going on due to strict venue capacity limits so my wedding planner and I organized our invite distribution to accommodate that. I had a bit of a unique situation there.)

    Anyways, that aside, I looked up the Venue's Minor Use Permit, which states that the noise cannot exceed 75 decibels, 75 FEET from the speakers. 

    If he is measuring any closer, and with a cheapy decibel reader not provided by the county, would I have the right to say something?

    Few side notes:

    (1) The original contract I signed with the venue just says "must not exceed 70 dB." with no further clarification. 

    (2)  The County Noise Ordinance even has looser guidelines, stating that it must be read from the property's perimeter! The property is HUGE so I doubt 150+ dB would reach the perimeter! 

    I'm assuming the venue's Minor Use Permit would override the county noise ordinance (right?) but I'm just trying to understand my rights as a paying customer.  I'm no lawyer. I'd like to talk to the owner but gather information and insight first.

    From the yelp reviews, it seemed like he was measuring near the speaker of the DJ, not 75 feet from it.  The comments said the chatter of the 100 guests was louder than the music, which is part of why they couldn't even hear it.  That just seems unreasonable.  What are my rights if the owner comes over and measures closer than 75 feet of the speakers? Does he have this right?

    Your special circumstances to A,B, and C list guests should also allow you to play music as loud as you want. I can't with the bolded.

    Anyway to answer your question OP, I think you're SOL until you talk to your coordinator/venue contact and see exactly what's going on here. They can make whatever crazy rules they want, and you signed off on it.

    People on Yelp could be over exaggerating, or  maybe not, but you have two options: cancel or go through with it, unless you talk to someone about the situation. I don't think internet strangers can fix this for you..
    charcoalandblush
  • RezIpsaRezIpsa member
    250 Love Its 100 Comments Name Dropper
    Just as an informational note (I am guessing you weren't aware), B listing is really rude. There are no special circumstances that make it anything less than rude, as well as a real slap in the face to your guests. Perhaps a change in venue would have the silver lining of allowing to abandon that part of your plans.

    And yeah, your contract controls in this case, so he is within his rights to measure the level an inch from the speakers if he chooses. If the county ordinance was more restrictive, it would control. What you can do is take a copy of the ordinance along with you when you go talk about it, and see if he is misinterpreting the ordinance.
    MesmrEweesstee33charcoalandblushPrettyGirlLost
  • larrygagalarrygaga Czechoslovakia member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    Sounds like it's time to find a venue that has enough room and enough loudness.
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    lyndausvicharcoalandblushPrettyGirlLost
  • levioosalevioosa Southern California member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Making an A, B, and C list was incredibly rude, OP.  It tiers your guests and makes them feel like second choice picks.  And I promise that as much as your wedding planner was saying, "It's so clever, no one with know!"  everyone will know.  Because sending out invites for an October wedding is insane and screams B-listing.  You plan and pay for the wedding you can afford.  If this venue cannot fit everyone, then you need to find a new venue. 


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    charcoalandblushPrettyGirlLostFosmoh
  • MesmrEweMesmrEwe member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited May 2015

    The venue is well within their rights to control the sound level.  Unlike you who is using the venue for one night, they still have to get their neighbors and the township to like them and allow them to stay in business, even if the permit is more restrictive than the county (Township/city trumps county in most cases).  Doing things like keeping the sound below the level ensures this to be the case.  Now that you've been made aware - you won't make the mistake the other brides did (i.e. not actually READING the darn contract!!!!), you can be prepared for this with your DJ.  Make sure you read the other clauses as well.  The terms of the permit may mean revocation if they're caught with the sound above a certain level, so they're simply covering their buns, if you can't agree to this term, you shouldn't have booked this venue and have some choices to make.  IMO, their (other brides) mistake in not reading the contract doesn't mean that they should be giving them horrid reviews.

    IMO most DJ's play music FAR too loud!  You can have a great time with the limit and still have hearing the next day.  It's not the 80's anymore when it was all the rage to shake the windows of the neighbor's house..

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  • (I have a crazy A list B list C list thing going on due to strict venue capacity limits so my wedding planner and I organized our invite distribution to accommodate that. I had a bit of a unique situation there.)

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    Stopped reading here.
    Yep.  If I got an invitation in May for an October wedding, I'd laugh and laugh and laugh and not RSVP until maybe late August, though probably mid September.  And if I got a call from the bride because I didn't RSVP, I'd tell her that I didn't know what I was doing yet in June let alone October, and if she needed me to RSVP immediately, I'd have to decline.  Because that shit is cray-cray.  Strict A, B, AND C list?  That's hysterical!
    RezIpsa[Deleted User]charcoalandblushPrettyGirlLost
  • thisismynickname2thisismynickname2 City By The Lake member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    Ignoring the enormous etiquette faux pas on A, B, and C lists, if you can afford to cancel, look into it. If you can't, I'm wondering about the layout of your venue. Is the DJ right next to the dance floor? Can the DJ point the speakers so they're directed at the dance floor rather than out over the rest of the reception area? That way people could hear the music if they're dancing, at least. 
    It's just an idea, I'm not an acoustics expert by any means, but it is actually nice to be able to hear people talking when I'm actually trying to talk to them and not out on the dance floor. 
    What does your DJ think about this clause in the contract? Professionals should be able to work in a variety of environments. Or, something else I saw once--- the DJ also had screens where the songs' music videos were projected. If people have a hard time hearing the music to lure them to the dance floor, music videos could inspire people to dance. 
    ________________________________


    MesmrEwePrettyGirlLost
  • lyndausvilyndausvi Western Slope, Colorado mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its
    You said in the last 18 months reviews mentioned the sound, but what about the most recent ones? 

      You said the venue is new, but has reviews from 18 months ago.  It could have been a case that the first few events the owners was over diligent on the sound, but it could have fixed itself by now.   All new places go through a little growing pains figuring things out.




    For the record, there is no way I could accurately RSVP to a wedding in Oct.  I'm trying to be mean or a bitch.  It's just DH's work life does not allow him to RSVP this far out.    Not only are B and C lists rude, but it's rude to the A list to RSVP this far out.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
    [Deleted User]lc07
  • redoryxredoryx member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer

    Thanks you guys for your replies.  (I have a crazy A list B list C list thing going on due to strict venue capacity limits so my wedding planner and I organized our invite distribution to accommodate that. I had a bit of a unique situation there.)

    Anyways, that aside, I looked up the Venue's Minor Use Permit, which states that the noise cannot exceed 75 decibels, 75 FEET from the speakers. 

    If he is measuring any closer, and with a cheapy decibel reader not provided by the county, would I have the right to say something?

    Few side notes:

    (1) The original contract I signed with the venue just says "must not exceed 70 dB." with no further clarification. 

    (2)  The County Noise Ordinance even has looser guidelines, stating that it must be read from the property's perimeter! The property is HUGE so I doubt 150+ dB would reach the perimeter! 

    I'm assuming the venue's Minor Use Permit would override the county noise ordinance (right?) but I'm just trying to understand my rights as a paying customer.  I'm no lawyer. I'd like to talk to the owner but gather information and insight first.

    From the yelp reviews, it seemed like he was measuring near the speaker of the DJ, not 75 feet from it.  The comments said the chatter of the 100 guests was louder than the music, which is part of why they couldn't even hear it.  That just seems unreasonable.  What are my rights if the owner comes over and measures closer than 75 feet of the speakers? Does he have this right?

    Please, share with us the unique situation that makes A B and C listing necessary.
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    [Deleted User]PrettyGirlLost
  • afox007afox007 member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary First Answer
    I think you should look into another venue. Yes, you already sent out invites but the wedding is in October. You have 5 months to find something and let your "A list" know about the change. 

    Best part is now you can find a venue that can accommodate all your guests and you can send out the revised invitations to EVERYONE without needing a B and C list. 
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    [Deleted User]thisismynickname2charcoalandblushAuroraRose41
  • edited May 2015
    Thanks guys!! Sorry, I lied. I didn't send out my invitations. I don't even have a B list. I just didn't want to re print them and didn't want to go into that as my concern wasnt about that. Had I mentioned it was because of how expensive my invites were, I would have gotten judged for that by poor people, so I tried to make up another excuse but I'll get judged n omatter what Soo I guess it doesn't matter. I should have assumed you crazy cats would focus on everything BUT the reason for my post though. Lol!

    Was just seeking advice but I was able to talk with Dj who was very experienced and professional and was able to talk to the owner about getting a special event permit from the county.

    Thanks guys! Problem solved!!
  • WHAT just happened!?

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  • NowIAmSypNowIAmSyp East Hanover, NJ member
    Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 500 Comments First Answer
    Just because I love this guy...

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    MesmrEweRezIpsaAuroraRose41
  • blueeyedkatblueeyedkat member
    25 Love Its 10 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    edited May 2015
    Okay...um yeah, "poor people". You're the one who decided to cheap out on a venue and go with the risks.
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    ...
    ...
    just wow. I kind of hope the owner goes extra crazy on the decibels.
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  • Just because I love this guy...

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    as a bird trainer I second this owl. WTF
  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 Ravens & Bohs & Crabs & O's member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    Thanks guys!! Sorry, I lied. I didn't send out my invitations. I don't even have a B list. I just didn't want to re print them and didn't want to go into that as my concern wasnt about that. Had I mentioned it was because of how expensive my invites were, I would have gotten judged for that by poor people, so I tried to make up another excuse but I'll get judged n omatter what Soo I guess it doesn't matter. I should have assumed you crazy cats would focus on everything BUT the reason for my post though. Lol! Was just seeking advice but I was able to talk with Dj who was very experienced and professional and was able to talk to the owner about getting a special event permit from the county. Thanks guys! Problem solved!!
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    MairePoppymrsdee15southernbelle0915
  • MesmrEweMesmrEwe member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited June 2015


    ...
    ...
    just wow. I kind of hope the owner goes extra crazy on the decibels.
    It sounds like he kind of has to because the township and county government are holding the licenses for him to be in business...  Some places are INSANE with their zoning!!!!
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  • Think about renting pipe and drape. It will cut the sound to the outside world from the venue. Then tell the owner to go stand outside with his decibel reader. 
  • PrettyGirlLostPrettyGirlLost A Land Filled with Unicorns and Cat Hair member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    Thanks guys!! Sorry, I lied. I didn't send out my invitations. I don't even have a B list. I just didn't want to re print them and didn't want to go into that as my concern wasnt about that. Had I mentioned it was because of how expensive my invites were, I would have gotten judged for that by poor people, so I tried to make up another excuse but I'll get judged n omatter what Soo I guess it doesn't matter. I should have assumed you crazy cats would focus on everything BUT the reason for my post though. Lol! Was just seeking advice but I was able to talk with Dj who was very experienced and professional and was able to talk to the owner about getting a special event permit from the county. Thanks guys! Problem solved!!
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    And you were worried about being judged by "poor people?!"  Are you serious?

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    I still judge the fuck out of you for wasting money on "expensive" invitations.

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


    esstee33fyrchk
  • huskypuppy14huskypuppy14 Boston Suburbs member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    Oh, I wish Ashley were here. She would have a field day.

    That is of course if you're not a troll, OP.
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  • FiancBFiancB MinnesOOOta member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    Thanks guys!! Sorry, I lied. I didn't send out my invitations. I don't even have a B list. I just didn't want to re print them and didn't want to go into that as my concern wasnt about that. Had I mentioned it was because of how expensive my invites were, I would have gotten judged for that by poor people, so I tried to make up another excuse but I'll get judged n omatter what Soo I guess it doesn't matter. I should have assumed you crazy cats would focus on everything BUT the reason for my post though. Lol! Was just seeking advice but I was able to talk with Dj who was very experienced and professional and was able to talk to the owner about getting a special event permit from the county. Thanks guys! Problem solved!!
    Whaaaaat? This.... doesn't make sense at all. 

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    BlergbotCharmedPam
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