What have I missed?

novella1186

lovegood90 said:

Oh! I forgot to ask- how did the walking down the aisle go- did you end up walking with your H? Also did the mic manage to keep itself away from your dad?! 

Oh man I feel like my original wedding re-cap should have been way longer lol. So much stuff happened/didn't happen. (Did I mention the parade?) 

So the aisle-walking thing was killing me. I didn't decide until it was literally time to start walking. The officiant wouldn't quit asking me who was gonna do it (what the fuck does it matter?! It doesn't impact the actual ceremony at all!), H's parents kept hoping I would let my parents walk me to avoiding causing a life-long family rift and hurt feelings that can't ever be un-done (they seriously were super worried aobut this), and H kept telling me to do whatever I thought I should do. 

So I thought, "Well, fuck it." 

I ended up having both my parents walk me like we originally planned, which seemed to calm down my crazy dad because he didn't try to do anything else after that. Didn't try to steal the mic, didn't try to make a scene, actually looked like he was having fun. (I think because we started off the day giving him something that he wanted.) 

I would have been fine without him walking me. I really was not worried at all about causing a rift between him and I, cuz we have no relationship. However, I hated the thought of hurting my mom and making her regret not getting to walk me. She's the type of person who would never get over it, and we've always been really close. So I think I did the right thing? I mean, I don't care that I let him walk me cuz it was like a 20-second thing. 

I didn't let the officent ask "who gives this bride away" or whatever cuz I HATE that phrase. He never owned me, I don't need to be "given." But I digress. I just gave him a half-hug and he sat down quietly. Peace restored. 

novella1186

flantastic said:

I went to TK jail for about 10 minutes! Literally. There's a "jail."

In my circle, it seems like some people go to Israel, a lot go to Ireland, and a ton go to Rome. I've only done the first one, and planned on maybe doing the others, but honestly your trip sounds like it might be more interesting than just straight-up being in Rome for a while.

Yeah I've always been disappointed in the big tourist-y cities. I'm kind of weird, though. I don't like crowds (I get really bad anxiety attacks if I get stuck in a crowd) and I don't like tourists (even thought I am one) so I try to go little bit "off the beaten path" or try to visit places I hadn't known about before so I feel like I'm "discovering" something, if that makes sense. 

We were really happy with our choice. You get all the food and wine you'd expect in Italy, plus that view. Plus being on the seaside, with mountains, a beach, lemon groves, vineyards. It's just a really beautiful place. 

I will warn you, though, I've read that during their high season (which is June till October, I believe) it gets packed full of tourists. We were super super happy that we went just before high season started. The pool decks were ready to go, the bars were stocked, the shops were open, but we didn't have to deal with crowds. 

theartistformerlyknownas

Have y'all ever been to the Prado museum in Madrid? There's a whole section of the Virgin Mary squirting breast milk on various biblical characters. Not like baby Jesus nursing, like her Super Soaker-ing disciples in the face from 3' away. 

redheadbride15

novella1186 said:

flantastic said:

I went to TK jail for about 10 minutes! Literally. There's a "jail."

In my circle, it seems like some people go to Israel, a lot go to Ireland, and a ton go to Rome. I've only done the first one, and planned on maybe doing the others, but honestly your trip sounds like it might be more interesting than just straight-up being in Rome for a while.

Yeah I've always been disappointed in the big tourist-y cities. I'm kind of weird, though. I don't like crowds (I get really bad anxiety attacks if I get stuck in a crowd) and I don't like tourists (even thought I am one) so I try to go little bit "off the beaten path" or try to visit places I hadn't known about before so I feel like I'm "discovering" something, if that makes sense. 

We were really happy with our choice. You get all the food and wine you'd expect in Italy, plus that view. Plus being on the seaside, with mountains, a beach, lemon groves, vineyards. It's just a really beautiful place. 

I will warn you, though, I've read that during their high season (which is June till October, I believe) it gets packed full of tourists. We were super super happy that we went just before high season started. The pool decks were ready to go, the bars were stocked, the shops were open, but we didn't have to deal with crowds. 

I've been to Italy several times (my mother was living there for a while, so with free room-and-board I couldn't say no).

I love, love, love Rome. It's a huge city but it's really easy to get off the beaten path there and get lost amongst the ruins (literally), and find tiny little squares with churches that you can have all to yourself. I've been there three times and I have a list of favorites that you won't find in a tour book, but if you just let yourself wander you will be amazed at what you just stumble across! Avoid the major tourist traps like the Pantheon, the Forum, and Trevi Fountain... or if you want to go to them then go first thing in the morning. And skip the Vatican Museums - the Sistine Chapel is NOT a place to be if you don't like crowds. Imagine waiting for hours to be packed like a sardine into a room where everyone is staring at the ceiling instead of watching where they are going. It's really not worth it, in my opinion.

And I second what novella says about avoiding the high season. I've been to Rome and the Amalfi coast both in April in different years, and it was perfect. Southern Italy gets hot, so spring is a perfect time to be there. I went to Florence at Christmas time and it was beautiful even though it was cold and wet, but it much, much less crowded than it normally would be. Unlike Rome, Florence is not a large city, so you can't really escape from the tourists.

novella1186

lolo883 said:

Have y'all ever been to the Prado museum in Madrid? There's a whole section of the Virgin Mary squirting breast milk on various biblical characters. Not like baby Jesus nursing, like her Super Soaker-ing disciples in the face from 3' away. 

yes! I went to the Prado a few years ago. It is a really awesome museum! The Virgin Mary thing didn't surprise me too much because I had been to Dali's house a few days before that lol. 

KatieinBkln

lolo883 said:

Have y'all ever been to the Prado museum in Madrid? There's a whole section of the Virgin Mary squirting breast milk on various biblical characters. Not like baby Jesus nursing, like her Super Soaker-ing disciples in the face from 3' away. 

That is maybe the greatest painting in the whole place. Besides Bosch's Garden of Earthly Delights, which is so fun and fucked up.

novella1186

redheadbride15 thanks! If I ever make it to Rome, I'm definitely going to remember what you said. 

That's our style of traveling anyway. We don't like to have plans, we just wander and see what we can find. I would love to get lost away from the crowds!  

hellosweetie1015

CMGragain said:

Well, I saw the giant penis.  It is on a fresco of the demi-god Priapus, near the front door of an upper class dwelling. 



The Romans regarded this as a symbol of power, fertility, and good luck.  They also had sculptures of male genetalia over their outer doors for good luck.  They didn't share our Puritanical attitudes.
The museum in Naples has a special section that used to be open to men only.  It features all kinds of erotic art found in Pompeii.  Didn't do anything for me.

THAT LOOKS LIKE A DAMN THIRD ARM. 

theartistformerlyknownas

hellosweetie1015 said:

CMGragain said:

Well, I saw the giant penis.  It is on a fresco of the demi-god Priapus, near the front door of an upper class dwelling. 



The Romans regarded this as a symbol of power, fertility, and good luck.  They also had sculptures of male genetalia over their outer doors for good luck.  They didn't share our Puritanical attitudes.
The museum in Naples has a special section that used to be open to men only.  It features all kinds of erotic art found in Pompeii.  Didn't do anything for me.

THAT LOOKS LIKE A DAMN THIRD ARM. 

It looks like it's gonna reach out and grab some Skittles in their next series of creepy ass commercials.

hellosweetie1015

lolo883 said:

hellosweetie1015 said:

CMGragain said:

Well, I saw the giant penis.  It is on a fresco of the demi-god Priapus, near the front door of an upper class dwelling. 



The Romans regarded this as a symbol of power, fertility, and good luck.  They also had sculptures of male genetalia over their outer doors for good luck.  They didn't share our Puritanical attitudes.
The museum in Naples has a special section that used to be open to men only.  It features all kinds of erotic art found in Pompeii.  Didn't do anything for me.

THAT LOOKS LIKE A DAMN THIRD ARM. 

It looks like it's gonna reach out and grab some Skittles in their next series of creepy ass commercials.

Oh, thanks, Lolo, I will NEVER UNSEE THAT MENTAL IMAGE. 

onefootinthebayou

flantastic said:

I went to TK jail for about 10 minutes! Literally. There's a "jail."

In my circle, it seems like some people go to Israel, a lot go to Ireland, and a ton go to Rome. I've only done the first one, and planned on maybe doing the others, but honestly your trip sounds like it might be more interesting than just straight-up being in Rome for a while.

Oh yeah! You missed Flan getting sent up the river! She was wrongly convicted, granted a full pardon, & released on her own recognizance. I thought there might be a prison riot there for a sec...

hellosweetie1015

onefootinthebayou said:

I went to TK jail for about 10 minutes! Literally. There's a "jail."

In my circle, it seems like some people go to Israel, a lot go to Ireland, and a ton go to Rome. I've only done the first one, and planned on maybe doing the others, but honestly your trip sounds like it might be more interesting than just straight-up being in Rome for a while.

Oh yeah! You missed Flan getting sent up the river! She was wrongly convicted, granted a full pardon, & released on her own recognizance. I thought there might be a prison riot there for a sec...

This is the best summary I have read for that hot mess YET.

[Deleted User]

lolo883 said:

hellosweetie1015 said:

CMGragain said:

Well, I saw the giant penis.  It is on a fresco of the demi-god Priapus, near the front door of an upper class dwelling. 



The Romans regarded this as a symbol of power, fertility, and good luck.  They also had sculptures of male genetalia over their outer doors for good luck.  They didn't share our Puritanical attitudes.
The museum in Naples has a special section that used to be open to men only.  It features all kinds of erotic art found in Pompeii.  Didn't do anything for me.

THAT LOOKS LIKE A DAMN THIRD ARM. 

It looks like it's gonna reach out and grab some Skittles in their next series of creepy ass commercials.

@lolo883 I have to change the channel every time I see that damn twerking dog.  Sooo creepy.

ashley8918

lolo883 said:

Have y'all ever been to the Prado museum in Madrid? There's a whole section of the Virgin Mary squirting breast milk on various biblical characters. Not like baby Jesus nursing, like her Super Soaker-ing disciples in the face from 3' away. 

UM, I know where i'm going next!

lovesclimbing

CMGragain said:

Well, I saw the giant penis.  It is on a fresco of the demi-god Priapus, near the front door of an upper class dwelling. 



The Romans regarded this as a symbol of power, fertility, and good luck.  They also had sculptures of male genetalia over their outer doors for good luck.  They didn't share our Puritanical attitudes.
The museum in Naples has a special section that used to be open to men only.  It features all kinds of erotic art found in Pompeii.  Didn't do anything for me.

Wow, does he actually have someone holding it up with strings tied to a stick?

FiancB

I saw some ancient art (not quite cave art? But almost that old) featuring men hunting down animals while sporting giant boners. People have always loved drawing penises, evidently. 

ShesSoCold

FiancB said:

I saw some ancient art (not quite cave art? But almost that old) featuring men hunting down animals while sporting giant boners. People have always loved drawing penises, evidently. 

Huge boners are timeless. 

hellosweetie1015

lovesclimbing said:

CMGragain said:

Well, I saw the giant penis.  It is on a fresco of the demi-god Priapus, near the front door of an upper class dwelling. 



The Romans regarded this as a symbol of power, fertility, and good luck.  They also had sculptures of male genetalia over their outer doors for good luck.  They didn't share our Puritanical attitudes.
The museum in Naples has a special section that used to be open to men only.  It features all kinds of erotic art found in Pompeii.  Didn't do anything for me.

Wow, does he actually have someone holding it up with strings tied to a stick?

HOOOOOOOOOOOOOLY SHIT HE DOES. 

redheadbride15

lovesclimbing said:

CMGragain said:

Well, I saw the giant penis.  It is on a fresco of the demi-god Priapus, near the front door of an upper class dwelling. 



The Romans regarded this as a symbol of power, fertility, and good luck.  They also had sculptures of male genetalia over their outer doors for good luck.  They didn't share our Puritanical attitudes.
The museum in Naples has a special section that used to be open to men only.  It features all kinds of erotic art found in Pompeii.  Didn't do anything for me.

Wow, does he actually have someone holding it up with strings tied to a stick?

"My penis is so large I have to have this slave follow me around to help me manage it"

FiancB

It makes me think of Superbad

Am I going to get a warning for posting dick drawings? Because I did on TB for talking about syphilis