Well that's a new one... (wedding bar)

huskypuppy14

Complaining about not having soda at a wedding, is like complaining there isn't a chicken dish option.

esstee33

***Removed for TOS violation***

lyndausvi

esstee33 said:

lyndausvi said:

sjf2715 said:

I just wanted to clarify for the one commenter who said "how the hell could soda be more expensive than beer and wine?!"

Well for our bar I was quite shocked to learn that it was. We were able to buy beer in kegs and wine in bottles for about 2.50 per glass. The only way to buy soda was to do it "unlimited" at something like $3/person/hour. JUST FOR FREAKING SODA! I can't remember the exact rate, but it was not cheap. The only way they would let us do consumption based for soda is if we had a full consumption based bar, raising the beer and wine per glass prices from around 2.50 per glass to $6 per glass, and since our crowd consisted of 80+ percent heavy beer and wine drinkers, we just couldn't afford to do a fully consumption based bar. Pop wasn't a priority for our guests, but beer and wine sure was.

Punch/lemonade/water was like $80 for the whole night, so affordable and (hopefully) satisfied the non-drinkers.

I do think it would be weird to serve pop as a mixer for liquor and then not have it offered for non-drinkers though.

Can you add iced tea?   I'm just thinking of the people who can't drink sugary drinks leaving them with only water.

You do realize this poster already got married, right? Everything has been posted in the past tense, and the very first post said "Full disclosure, we didn't have soda or any non-alcoholic beverages at our bar."

Unless the poster is a time-traveler, I'm guessing they can't add iced tea at this point. 

But also, it's not against etiquette to not host soda as long as there are other NA options. It's rude as fuck as a guest to go to a wedding expecting X level of hospitality and being salty that it's not what you personally would want. Nobody is required to host every fucking potential option just in case a guest would prefer that. I'd prefer steak at every wedding I go to, but that's not my hosts' problem if that's not within their budget. We tell people all the time to host what they can afford. They did host what they could afford. If you know lemonade or punch will set you into a sugar low, don't drink it. Or if Sprite is literally the only thing you will drink, why don't you bring a can with you everywhere you go? You can't ever guarantee that it's going to be offered, even if there are other soda options. 

nope, I didn't notice.  Thanks for the pointing that out.   I have a reading comprehension problem sometimes.

Water is my drink of choice.  I only drink sprite once in a while. So I would be fine.  I also drink wine and beer.  So again I would be fine.

It was more of pointing out that 2 sugary drinks is not really the best option because people do have issues with sugary drinks.  Having something like unsweetened  iced tea and a sugary drink appeals to a broader crowd.

I've always said provide what you can on your budget, however the more options the better.  If soda is too expensive, then teas and juices are okay.  If you want to appeal to a broader crowd do not pick 2 heavily sugar packed options.  At least with tea you can add sugar.  You can't take it away though.

aurianna

I hope it's understood that I didn't post this because I was sore I didn't get a free ginger ale, but rather because soda was being offered the first half of the wedding, only for it to suddenly be charged for later, with no notice until hubby ordered it.
Also, they had been offering lemonade as well, but for all I know they started charging for that too.

If there had been no soda from the start I honestly would have been fine. I would have been disappointed because ginger ale is sort of a life-line right now, but I would have just drank water and not thought that the bride & groom did anything rude.


I've been to weddings where the only entree is chicken (not hubby's fav) or where the only cake type is chocolate (not my fav), but we never thought those were rude (though I was def starving at the one wedding I went to where the only entree was salmon and the apps were all sushi. ick ick ick).

If water, punch and lemonade are the only NAs, so be it. As long as they aren't charging for anything, drink the water and move on.

madamerwin

aurianna said:

I hope it's understood that I didn't post this because I was sore I didn't get a free ginger ale, but rather because soda was being offered the first half of the wedding, only for it to suddenly be charged for later, with no notice until hubby ordered it.
Also, they had been offering lemonade as well, but for all I know they started charging for that too.

If there had been no soda from the start I honestly would have been fine. I would have been disappointed because ginger ale is sort of a life-line right now, but I would have just drank water and not thought that the bride & groom did anything rude.


I've been to weddings where the only entree is chicken (not hubby's fav) or where the only cake type is chocolate (not my fav), but we never thought those were rude (though I was def starving at the one wedding I went to where the only entree was salmon and the apps were all sushi. ick ick ick).

If water, punch and lemonade are the only NAs, so be it. As long as they aren't charging for anything, drink the water and move on.

Personally I would be thrilled with all sushi, all the time, but I think that only offering seafood is not a cool thing to do. Lots of people HATE fish, and if I were a fish-hater, I would side-eye not having any other options.

PrettyGirlLost

lyndausvi said:

huskypuppy14 said:

STARMOON44 said:

That is horrible! Sorry you had to experience that.

Full disclosure, we didn't have soda or any non-alcoholic beverages at our bar (it was waaay too expensive to host) so we had punch, lemonade and water available for guests near the coffee station, and we made it really obvious that it was there. If you can't afford ridiculously priced non-alcoholic soda for your non-alcoholic drink, it is your responsibility to make sure that guests can still get something that you CAN afford.

As a guest I would find this absolutely baffling. You're telling me getting a Sprite is impossible because of cost? At what bar is a soda more expensive than a beer? I don't think punch, lemonade, and water are at all suitably equivalent to beer and wine. For starters, your only non-sugary option is water. Not the festive equivalent of wine at all. Acceptable as the only beverages, sure, but if one person can get wine another should be able to get Coke. I think it's like if you serve steak, lobster, or plain pasta with butter. Yes, you have a vegetarian option, but it's not remotely comparable.

You realize Coke probably has way more sugar than lemonade or punch. While I would never do it, not having soda at a wedding is not an etiquette breech. If people are only offering beer, wine, punch, lemonade and water, that is what they are offering. 

I'm hypoglycemic.  Straight punch and lemonade affect my sugar levels  more than sprite or coke ever has.   I get such a sugar low after punches and lemonades.  Light headed, shakes, weak, hot flashes, feel like I'm going to pass out.   Yeah, loads of fun.

Sodas do not affect me the same way.   I do have a Sprite every now and then and I feel fine. 

For the most part I do not drink ANY juices or sodas.   About 1-2 times a month I have a soda or Arnold palmer. Given the choice between sodas and juices, I would pick a sprite over a punch/juice any day.    A glass of punch almost guarantees me to have a sugar low.  I haven't had one due to drinking a sprite.

I'm confused.

Hypoglycemia means you have low blood sugar, and the symptoms in bold reflect that.  To remedy you are supposed to consume glucose or simple carbs.  The best way to raise blood sugar is to drink orange juice as it is quickly metabolized and doesn't produce a huge spike in blood sugar levels.

So if you are hypoglycemic- low blood sugar, how does consuming soft drinks full of sugar lower your blood sugar?  Do you mean they create a spike and then your blood sugar levels crash?

Viczaesar

I think that diabetics should have more options than just water, the same way that I think vegetarians/vegans should have more options than just non-filling side dishes to eat.

emmaaa

At our wedding we provided beer and wine, sweet tea, unsweet tea, and water. 

I would have been pissed if my gingerale was free before supper but $2.450 after. That is ridiculous.

I like @huskypuppy14's explanation. It really is comparable to complaining that they didn't have a chicken option for the meal. And @maggie0829's example that it is similar to complaining about the type of beer or wine a couple provided. If there is a NA option (both sugar-y and non) then I think you are covered. Sure, providing soda would be nice but tea and water is very inexpensive. FTR, I completely blanked on NA beverages and forgot to buy soda as planned. Luckily, the caterer provided the tea and water.

aurianna

Viczaesar said:

I think that diabetics should have more options than just water, the same way that I think vegetarians/vegans should have more options than just non-filling side dishes to eat.

I disagree that those are the same.
If the wedding is at a meal time, a meal must be provided. Most weddings I've ever been to either have a veggie meal choice or are buffet (the few that just bring out single entree, I'd hope that they made special arrangements for veggies). That's a must.

Having a specific non-water drink for a very, very small percentage of guests... I don't feel like that is a necessity.

If water, lemonade, beer and wine are all already provided, I think it's presumptive to expect the host to tack on $100+ to their bar bill because there might be a diabetic at the wedding. Diabetics can drink water. A fancy beverage is not a requirement for a meal.
I know when I eat out at a restaurant I usually just drink water. I assume I am not alone in this. Water at dinner is fairly typical and not some third-world situation..

MyNameIsNot

aurianna said:

Viczaesar said:

I think that diabetics should have more options than just water, the same way that I think vegetarians/vegans should have more options than just non-filling side dishes to eat.

I disagree that those are the same.
If the wedding is at a meal time, a meal must be provided. Most weddings I've ever been to either have a veggie meal choice or are buffet (the few that just bring out single entree, I'd hope that they made special arrangements for veggies). That's a must.

Having a specific non-water drink for a very, very small percentage of guests... I don't feel like that is a necessity.

If water, lemonade, beer and wine are all already provided, I think it's presumptive to expect the host to tack on $100+ to their bar bill because there might be a diabetic at the wedding. Diabetics can drink water. A fancy beverage is not a requirement for a meal.
I know when I eat out at a restaurant I usually just drink water. I assume I am not alone in this. Water at dinner is fairly typical and not some third-world situation..

That's where I disagree. The number of guests who avoid sugary drinks is not a very, very small percentage. People avoid sugary drinks for any number of health related reasons. This is why diet/unsweetened drinks are taking over the market.

I don't think you need to offer soda, but I also can't imagine why a host wouldn't at least offer tea or some sort of unsweetened beverage. It's like a couple that wants to offer beer only. Sure, it's technically ok by etiquette, but it's pretty short sighted to not at least offer some sort of wine along with it. 

SP29

I will also tack onto my post (as I am a big supporter that water is *just* fine), that in Canada iced tea is essentially sweet tea, except that commercially there isn't any actual tea in it, sugar and lemon (which wouldn't solve the lemonade and punch debate).

Iced tea is not commonly sugar free, unless you're all trendy and make your own David's tea cold (which is awesome, but would be expensive for a large group). 

So, sugar free options are water, tea, coffee and sugar free pop or juice. 

We had a line on our RSVPs for dietary restrictions. If someone put something on there about having diabetes or hypoglycemia, then I would do my best to accommodate those guests. But having water as a sugar free option is not wrong. My grandma is diabetic- she had the same options at the wedding as she would at home (though we did have pop as part of our open bar). 

Kahlyla

So (for some of us) when we say that "a cake and punch reception is just fine" what we really mean is, "but only if it also has pop"?

huskypuppy14

Kahlyla said:

So (for some of us) when we say that "a cake and punch reception is just fine" what we really mean is, "but only if it also has pop"?

I was going to say something similar.

A cake and punch reception is fine by etiquette. But many regs on here have said a cake and punch reception would be odd in their family, and they would never do it. Just like many say not having soda would be odd. 

I think we are all smart enough to distinguish between what we would do/ what is normal in our circle, and what is etiquette appropriate.

When people start saying "you must have soda at a wedding" is when their opinions are mingling with what is acceptable by etiquette. 

STARMOON44

I think cake and just punch is fine. Cake, beer, wine, champagne, and just water or punch is where I think you're treating non-drinking guests poorly.

Viczaesar

aurianna said:

Viczaesar said:

I think that diabetics should have more options than just water, the same way that I think vegetarians/vegans should have more options than just non-filling side dishes to eat.

I disagree that those are the same.
If the wedding is at a meal time, a meal must be provided. Most weddings I've ever been to either have a veggie meal choice or are buffet (the few that just bring out single entree, I'd hope that they made special arrangements for veggies). That's a must.

Having a specific non-water drink for a very, very small percentage of guests... I don't feel like that is a necessity.

If water, lemonade, beer and wine are all already provided, I think it's presumptive to expect the host to tack on $100+ to their bar bill because there might be a diabetic at the wedding. Diabetics can drink water. A fancy beverage is not a requirement for a meal.
I know when I eat out at a restaurant I usually just drink water. I assume I am not alone in this. Water at dinner is fairly typical and not some third-world situation..

And vegetarians or celiacs can eat the side veggies if they have to, but not providing a comparable main option for them is poor hosting. 

There's nothing fancy about unsweetened iced tea or sugar-free lemonade.  You don't have to provide soda to satisfy giving diabetics more to drink than just water.  You choosing to only drink water at a restaurant (which is what I do too, by the way, I love water) is not relevant to the question of hosting your guests well. 

RE the first bolded - there are a whole hell of a lot of diabetics in the US.  In fact, according to the CDC 9.3% of the population of the United States has diabetes (although a quarter of those are undiagnosed).  In comparison, only 1% of the population has celiac disease.  Are you not going to worry about that "very, very small" population as well when planning for your guests?  It's significantly smaller than the number of diabetics, after all.  How about vegetarians and vegans?  The numbers vary greatly, but let's be generous and say 10% of the American population identifies as vegetarian or vegan.  (From Wikipedia: A 2013 Public Policy Polling survey found 13% of Americans identify as either vegetarian (6%) or vegan (7%). A 2012 Gallup poll found 5% of Americans identify as vegetarian and 2% as vegan. A 2008 Harris Interactive poll found that 10% of adults "largely follow a vegetarian-inclined diet," with 3.2% following a vegetarian diet and 0.5% identifying as vegans. A 2000 Zogby Poll found that 2.5% of respondents reported not eating meat, poultry, or fish; while 4.5 percent reported not eating meat.)  Way less than 1% of the American public keeps Kosher, do you tell your Conservative and Orthodox Jewish friends they're SOL?

Viczaesar

Kahlyla said:

So (for some of us) when we say that "a cake and punch reception is just fine" what we really mean is, "but only if it also has pop"?

I only think strict cake and punch is fine if there are no people who can't eat cake or drink punch.  Otherwise a cake and punch reception should also provide something savory if there are diabetics/celiacs/vegans (e.g. crackers, fruit plate, cheese, veggie tray) and something without sugar to drink (coffee, iced tea, sugar free punch, whatever).  Generally cake and punch receptions are just shorthand for a limited amount of food and drink at a non-meal time; they often have other light munchies and drinks, for just that reason.

Jen4948

Viczaesar said:

aurianna said:

Viczaesar said:

I think that diabetics should have more options than just water, the same way that I think vegetarians/vegans should have more options than just non-filling side dishes to eat.

I disagree that those are the same.
If the wedding is at a meal time, a meal must be provided. Most weddings I've ever been to either have a veggie meal choice or are buffet (the few that just bring out single entree, I'd hope that they made special arrangements for veggies). That's a must.

Having a specific non-water drink for a very, very small percentage of guests... I don't feel like that is a necessity.

If water, lemonade, beer and wine are all already provided, I think it's presumptive to expect the host to tack on $100+ to their bar bill because there might be a diabetic at the wedding. Diabetics can drink water. A fancy beverage is not a requirement for a meal.
I know when I eat out at a restaurant I usually just drink water. I assume I am not alone in this. Water at dinner is fairly typical and not some third-world situation..

And vegetarians or celiacs can eat the side veggies if they have to, but not providing a comparable main option for them is poor hosting. 

There's nothing fancy about unsweetened iced tea or sugar-free lemonade.  You don't have to provide soda to satisfy giving diabetics more to drink than just water.  You choosing to only drink water at a restaurant (which is what I do too, by the way, I love water) is not relevant to the question of hosting your guests well. 

RE the first bolded - there are a whole hell of a lot of diabetics in the US.  In fact, according to the CDC 9.3% of the population of the United States has diabetes (although a quarter of those are undiagnosed).  In comparison, only 1% of the population has celiac disease.  Are you not going to worry about that "very, very small" population as well when planning for your guests?  It's significantly smaller than the number of diabetics, after all.  How about vegetarians and vegans?  The numbers vary greatly, but let's be generous and say 10% of the American population identifies as vegetarian or vegan.  (From Wikipedia: A 2013 Public Policy Polling survey found 13% of Americans identify as either vegetarian (6%) or vegan (7%). A 2012 Gallup poll found 5% of Americans identify as vegetarian and 2% as vegan. A 2008 Harris Interactive
poll found that 10% of adults "largely follow a vegetarian-inclined
diet," with 3.2% following a vegetarian diet and 0.5% identifying as
vegans. A 2000 Zogby Poll found that 2.5% of respondents reported not eating
meat, poultry, or fish; while 4.5 percent reported not eating meat.)  Way less than 1% of the American public keeps Kosher, do you tell your Conservative and Orthodox Jewish friends they're SOL?

While I don't think you have to, or even can, plan something for every single food condition, given how many people have diabetes and that the number keeps going up, I think offering water as the only sugar-free option is cutting the wrong corner at their expense.

MollyandD

I don't drink alcohol or soda, so I never even thought to have soda at my wedding. Maybe I'm "cheap," as someone said, but I didn't want to pay for it. My venue didn't have a stocked bar. They provided water, tea, and punch. I brought in a drink machine with two barrels of alcohol slushes and one barrel of non-alcohol. If I had served soda, I would have had to buy it all and bring it in. 

About the diabetic guests post... Many people may be trying to manage their blood sugar, and you wouldn't know it. My aunt is (was? She had a pancreas transplant after the wedding.) a type 1 diabetic. Her condition affects her in so many negative ways, and everyone that knows her knows that. My grandpa was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes. His can be managed with diet, and very few people would know about his diabetes. You never know what guests may be trying to control diabetes, so don't assume none of them have any blood sugar concerns. 

PrettyGirlLost

STARMOON44 said:

I think cake and just punch is fine. Cake, beer, wine, champagne, and just water or punch is where I think you're treating non-drinking guests poorly.

What?  That makes no sense.

How is cake and punch fine, but cake and punch, water, and some booze not ok?  Just because you add booze you now have to add pop into the mix?  I don't think that's how it works.

Jen4948

PrettyGirlLost said:

STARMOON44 said:

I think cake and just punch is fine. Cake, beer, wine, champagne, and just water or punch is where I think you're treating non-drinking guests poorly.

What?  That makes no sense.

How is cake and punch fine, but cake and punch, water, and some booze not ok?  Just because you add booze you now have to add pop into the mix?  I don't think that's how it works.

I don't get that either.

MyNameIsNot

PrettyGirlLost said:

STARMOON44 said:

I think cake and just punch is fine. Cake, beer, wine, champagne, and just water or punch is where I think you're treating non-drinking guests poorly.

What?  That makes no sense.

How is cake and punch fine, but cake and punch, water, and some booze not ok?  Just because you add booze you now have to add pop into the mix?  I don't think that's how it works.

No, now that you've added lots of variety for drinking guests, you should add more n/a options. 

You don't focus all of your hosting on one set of guests while ignoring the others. This is really no different than offering a decent veggie meal. You don't have to serve dinner, but once you decide to, you treat everyone similarly. 

PrettyGirlLost

MyNameIsNot said:

PrettyGirlLost said:

STARMOON44 said:

I think cake and just punch is fine. Cake, beer, wine, champagne, and just water or punch is where I think you're treating non-drinking guests poorly.

What?  That makes no sense.

How is cake and punch fine, but cake and punch, water, and some booze not ok?  Just because you add booze you now have to add pop into the mix?  I don't think that's how it works.

No, now that you've added lots of variety for drinking guests, you should add more n/a options. 

You don't focus all of your hosting on one set of guests while ignoring the others. This is really no different than offering a decent veggie meal. You don't have to serve dinner, but once you decide to, you treat everyone similarly. 

That's really a strange way of thinking about it, and not something that even entered my mind when reading this thread.

VulgarGirl

Kahlyla said:

So (for some of us) when we say that "a cake and punch reception is just fine" what we really mean is, "but only if it also has pop"?

I would actually prefer it if it had a glass of milk available. Or at least water. The combo of the sugar in the cake and the sugar in punch would totally spike my blood sugar and then I'd drop fast. Also I have never had punch with cake. I always have milk or water.

So I'm coming down very firmly on the side of "water should be easily available". 

Liatris2010

I call them cake and coffee receptions. Who would wash down frosting with fruit punch? Gross.

STARMOON44

MyNameIsNot said:

PrettyGirlLost said:

STARMOON44 said:

I think cake and just punch is fine. Cake, beer, wine, champagne, and just water or punch is where I think you're treating non-drinking guests poorly.

What?  That makes no sense.

How is cake and punch fine, but cake and punch, water, and some booze not ok?  Just because you add booze you now have to add pop into the mix?  I don't think that's how it works.

No, now that you've added lots of variety for drinking guests, you should add more n/a options. 

You don't focus all of your hosting on one set of guests while ignoring the others. This is really no different than offering a decent veggie meal. You don't have to serve dinner, but once you decide to, you treat everyone similarly. 

This is exactly what I mean. If you serve plain chicken and rice, or plain pasta and cheese, fine. Even though those options don't work for everyone. If you serve filet, or salmon en croute, or plain pasta with cheese, that option no longer strikes me as polite to your vegetarian guests.

lyndausvi

PrettyGirlLost said:

lyndausvi said:

huskypuppy14 said:

STARMOON44 said:

That is horrible! Sorry you had to experience that.

Full disclosure, we didn't have soda or any non-alcoholic beverages at our bar (it was waaay too expensive to host) so we had punch, lemonade and water available for guests near the coffee station, and we made it really obvious that it was there. If you can't afford ridiculously priced non-alcoholic soda for your non-alcoholic drink, it is your responsibility to make sure that guests can still get something that you CAN afford.

As a guest I would find this absolutely baffling. You're telling me getting a Sprite is impossible because of cost? At what bar is a soda more expensive than a beer? I don't think punch, lemonade, and water are at all suitably equivalent to beer and wine. For starters, your only non-sugary option is water. Not the festive equivalent of wine at all. Acceptable as the only beverages, sure, but if one person can get wine another should be able to get Coke. I think it's like if you serve steak, lobster, or plain pasta with butter. Yes, you have a vegetarian option, but it's not remotely comparable.

You realize Coke probably has way more sugar than lemonade or punch. While I would never do it, not having soda at a wedding is not an etiquette breech. If people are only offering beer, wine, punch, lemonade and water, that is what they are offering. 

I'm hypoglycemic.  Straight punch and lemonade affect my sugar levels  more than sprite or coke ever has.   I get such a sugar low after punches and lemonades.  Light headed, shakes, weak, hot flashes, feel like I'm going to pass out.   Yeah, loads of fun.

Sodas do not affect me the same way.   I do have a Sprite every now and then and I feel fine. 

For the most part I do not drink ANY juices or sodas.   About 1-2 times a month I have a soda or Arnold palmer. Given the choice between sodas and juices, I would pick a sprite over a punch/juice any day.    A glass of punch almost guarantees me to have a sugar low.  I haven't had one due to drinking a sprite.

I'm confused.

Hypoglycemia means you have low blood sugar, and the symptoms in bold reflect that.  To remedy you are supposed to consume glucose or simple carbs.  The best way to raise blood sugar is to drink orange juice as it is quickly metabolized and doesn't produce a huge spike in blood sugar levels.

So if you are hypoglycemic- low blood sugar, how does consuming soft drinks full of sugar lower your blood sugar?  Do you mean they create a spike and then your blood sugar levels crash?

They make me spike and then crash.   OJ and lemonade are the worse.   I stopped drinking OJ a long time ago.  I only have lemonade with unsweetened iced tea. 

Sprites do not have the same effect.   Cokes I would get spikes though.  I stopped drinking them a while ago too.  Sprites I only drink 1-2 times a month with a meal.

I had to stop eating pancakes and waffles because they make me spike and crash

While perfectly acceptable cake and punch reception would be horrible for me.   If I ate and drank I would spike and then crash.   Not fun at all. 

That is often why I suggest a non-sugar option like veggies or cheese tray and iced tea in addition to punch for those having a cake and punch reception.   That was those of us who have sugar issues are covered.

thisismynickname2

I'm having a really deep thought here.

A PP mentioned how in Paris, the wine is nearly the same price as water. I've observed that, and also observed it in Germany and Italy. Water's freaking expensive and wine/beer are freaking cheap!

So all the speschul snowflake brides on here that say, "I'm having a cash bar because I can't afford all that alcohol," would it be like Opposite Day in some European countries? "I can't afford water so people are just going to have booze it up for free and pay for that expensive life blood."

PrettyGirlLost

Liatris2010 said:

I call them cake and coffee receptions. Who would wash down frosting with fruit punch? Gross.

Who actually eats the frosting?  Gross!

WinstonsGirl

PrettyGirlLost said:

Liatris2010 said:

I call them cake and coffee receptions. Who would wash down frosting with fruit punch? Gross.

Who actually eats the frosting?  Gross!

I still eat the cake first and the frosting after so I get more yummy frosting taste.  But I'm also 6 years old

aurianna

Viczaesar said:

And vegetarians or celiacs can eat the side veggies if they have to, but not providing a comparable main option for them is poor hosting. 

There's nothing fancy about unsweetened iced tea or sugar-free lemonade.  You don't have to provide soda to satisfy giving diabetics more to drink than just water.  You choosing to only drink water at a restaurant (which is what I do too, by the way, I love water) is not relevant to the question of hosting your guests well. 

RE the first bolded - there are a whole hell of a lot of diabetics in the US.  In fact, according to the CDC 9.3% of the population of the United States has diabetes (although a quarter of those are undiagnosed).  In comparison, only 1% of the population has celiac disease.  Are you not going to worry about that "very, very small" population as well when planning for your guests?  It's significantly smaller than the number of diabetics, after all.  How about vegetarians and vegans?  The numbers vary greatly, but let's be generous and say 10% of the American population identifies as vegetarian or vegan.  (From Wikipedia: A 2013 Public Policy Polling survey found 13% of Americans identify as either vegetarian (6%) or vegan (7%). A 2012 Gallup poll found 5% of Americans identify as vegetarian and 2% as vegan. A 2008 Harris Interactive poll found that 10% of adults "largely follow a vegetarian-inclined diet," with 3.2% following a vegetarian diet and 0.5% identifying as vegans. A 2000 Zogby Poll found that 2.5% of respondents reported not eating meat, poultry, or fish; while 4.5 percent reported not eating meat.)  Way less than 1% of the American public keeps Kosher, do you tell your Conservative and Orthodox Jewish friends they're SOL?

But again, a host is required to serve a meal to their guest if it's meal time; so I don't disagree that there should be a veggie meal and/or openness to hearing guests' dietary concerns.

But it is NOT required for the host to give everyone a huge array of beverages.


And back on the meal...
While I think a host should definitely host a veggie option... that doesn't mean it's going to be everyone's favorite. Maybe it's pasta with fungus in it. Then I'm out. (Or last wedding I went to, my staple, chicken, was cooked in a lemon juice with raspberries... fruity chicken = icky death. One of my biggest food aversions). But I don't think it's the host's responsibility to contact every single guest and make sure everyone is 100% happy with every specific in the food and drink.

Well in that same vein... not everyone is going to be happy with the type of drinks. But as long as there is water, the host is keeping people hydrated.


I still think diabetics are a corner case but let's go with that for a sec. You are invited to a dinner party. Pretend you are a diabetic but that hosts of a party may not know.
You go to the house and this happens:

Host: Would you like some wine?
You: No thank you.
Host: How about a beer?
You: No thank you.
Host: How about some lemonade?
You: No thank you
Host: How about some punch?
You: No thank you.
Host: Water?
You: Sure, thanks. (But thinking "Gosh, what a rude host! Not having iced tea!")

I really hope not.



If a non-sugary, non-water option is available to the host at a non-exorbitant fee, then sure. Tack that on there. But I think it's really unfair to call someone a poor host for not getting extra drinks when water is good for everyone, including diabetics.