Well that's a new one... (wedding bar)

Jen4948

aurianna said:

Viczaesar said:

And vegetarians or celiacs can eat the side veggies if they have to, but not providing a comparable main option for them is poor hosting. 

There's nothing fancy about unsweetened iced tea or sugar-free lemonade.  You don't have to provide soda to satisfy giving diabetics more to drink than just water.  You choosing to only drink water at a restaurant (which is what I do too, by the way, I love water) is not relevant to the question of hosting your guests well. 

RE the first bolded - there are a whole hell of a lot of diabetics in the US.  In fact, according to the CDC 9.3% of the population of the United States has diabetes (although a quarter of those are undiagnosed).  In comparison, only 1% of the population has celiac disease.  Are you not going to worry about that "very, very small" population as well when planning for your guests?  It's significantly smaller than the number of diabetics, after all.  How about vegetarians and vegans?  The numbers vary greatly, but let's be generous and say 10% of the American population identifies as vegetarian or vegan.  (From Wikipedia: A 2013 Public Policy Polling survey found 13% of Americans identify as either vegetarian (6%) or vegan (7%). A 2012 Gallup poll found 5% of Americans identify as vegetarian and 2% as vegan. A 2008 Harris Interactive
poll found that 10% of adults "largely follow a vegetarian-inclined
diet," with 3.2% following a vegetarian diet and 0.5% identifying as
vegans. A 2000 Zogby Poll found that 2.5% of respondents reported not eating
meat, poultry, or fish; while 4.5 percent reported not eating meat.)  Way less than 1% of the American public keeps Kosher, do you tell your Conservative and Orthodox Jewish friends they're SOL?

But again, a host is required to serve a meal to their guest if it's meal time; so I don't disagree that there should be a veggie meal and/or openness to hearing guests' dietary concerns.

But it is NOT required for the host to give everyone a huge array of beverages.


And back on the meal...
While I think a host should definitely host a veggie option... that doesn't mean it's going to be everyone's favorite. Maybe it's pasta with fungus in it. Then I'm out. (Or last wedding I went to, my staple, chicken, was cooked in a lemon juice with raspberries... fruity chicken = icky death. One of my biggest food aversions). But I don't think it's the host's responsibility to contact every single guest and make sure everyone is 100% happy with every specific in the food and drink.

Well in that same vein... not everyone is going to be happy with the type of drinks. But as long as there is water, the host is keeping people hydrated.


I still think diabetics are a corner case but let's go with that for a sec. You are invited to a dinner party. Pretend you are a diabetic but that hosts of a party may not know.
You go to the house and this happens:

Host: Would you like some wine?
You: No thank you.
Host: How about a beer?
You: No thank you.
Host: How about some lemonade?
You: No thank you
Host: How about some punch?
You: No thank you.
Host: Water?
You: Sure, thanks. (But thinking "Gosh, what a rude host! Not having iced tea!")

I really hope not.



If a non-sugary, non-water option is available to the host at a non-exorbitant fee, then sure. Tack that on there. But I think it's really unfair to call someone a poor host for not getting extra drinks when water is good for everyone, including diabetics.




Bullshit. If I were diabetic and the only fucking things I could eat or drink at a wedding were bread and water "because everyone can eat/drink them" but there were a slew of sugary options for everyone else, I'm going to question whether or not I want to continue a relationship with the "host." That's being fucking inconsiderate.

banana468

aurianna said:

Viczaesar said:

And vegetarians or celiacs can eat the side veggies if they have to, but not providing a comparable main option for them is poor hosting. 

There's nothing fancy about unsweetened iced tea or sugar-free lemonade.  You don't have to provide soda to satisfy giving diabetics more to drink than just water.  You choosing to only drink water at a restaurant (which is what I do too, by the way, I love water) is not relevant to the question of hosting your guests well. 

RE the first bolded - there are a whole hell of a lot of diabetics in the US.  In fact, according to the CDC 9.3% of the population of the United States has diabetes (although a quarter of those are undiagnosed).  In comparison, only 1% of the population has celiac disease.  Are you not going to worry about that "very, very small" population as well when planning for your guests?  It's significantly smaller than the number of diabetics, after all.  How about vegetarians and vegans?  The numbers vary greatly, but let's be generous and say 10% of the American population identifies as vegetarian or vegan.  (From Wikipedia: A 2013 Public Policy Polling survey found 13% of Americans identify as either vegetarian (6%) or vegan (7%). A 2012 Gallup poll found 5% of Americans identify as vegetarian and 2% as vegan. A 2008 Harris Interactive poll found that 10% of adults "largely follow a vegetarian-inclined diet," with 3.2% following a vegetarian diet and 0.5% identifying as vegans. A 2000 Zogby Poll found that 2.5% of respondents reported not eating meat, poultry, or fish; while 4.5 percent reported not eating meat.)  Way less than 1% of the American public keeps Kosher, do you tell your Conservative and Orthodox Jewish friends they're SOL?

But again, a host is required to serve a meal to their guest if it's meal time; so I don't disagree that there should be a veggie meal and/or openness to hearing guests' dietary concerns.

But it is NOT required for the host to give everyone a huge array of beverages.


And back on the meal...
While I think a host should definitely host a veggie option... that doesn't mean it's going to be everyone's favorite. Maybe it's pasta with fungus in it. Then I'm out. (Or last wedding I went to, my staple, chicken, was cooked in a lemon juice with raspberries... fruity chicken = icky death. One of my biggest food aversions). But I don't think it's the host's responsibility to contact every single guest and make sure everyone is 100% happy with every specific in the food and drink.

Well in that same vein... not everyone is going to be happy with the type of drinks. But as long as there is water, the host is keeping people hydrated.


I still think diabetics are a corner case but let's go with that for a sec. You are invited to a dinner party. Pretend you are a diabetic but that hosts of a party may not know.
You go to the house and this happens:

Host: Would you like some wine?
You: No thank you.
Host: How about a beer?
You: No thank you.
Host: How about some lemonade?
You: No thank you
Host: How about some punch?
You: No thank you.
Host: Water?
You: Sure, thanks. (But thinking "Gosh, what a rude host! Not having iced tea!")

I really hope not.



If a non-sugary, non-water option is available to the host at a non-exorbitant fee, then sure. Tack that on there. But I think it's really unfair to call someone a poor host for not getting extra drinks when water is good for everyone, including diabetics.

By that logic though all they needed to offer was water. 

MyNameIsNot

aurianna said:

Viczaesar said:

And vegetarians or celiacs can eat the side veggies if they have to, but not providing a comparable main option for them is poor hosting. 

There's nothing fancy about unsweetened iced tea or sugar-free lemonade.  You don't have to provide soda to satisfy giving diabetics more to drink than just water.  You choosing to only drink water at a restaurant (which is what I do too, by the way, I love water) is not relevant to the question of hosting your guests well. 

RE the first bolded - there are a whole hell of a lot of diabetics in the US.  In fact, according to the CDC 9.3% of the population of the United States has diabetes (although a quarter of those are undiagnosed).  In comparison, only 1% of the population has celiac disease.  Are you not going to worry about that "very, very small" population as well when planning for your guests?  It's significantly smaller than the number of diabetics, after all.  How about vegetarians and vegans?  The numbers vary greatly, but let's be generous and say 10% of the American population identifies as vegetarian or vegan.  (From Wikipedia: A 2013 Public Policy Polling survey found 13% of Americans identify as either vegetarian (6%) or vegan (7%). A 2012 Gallup poll found 5% of Americans identify as vegetarian and 2% as vegan. A 2008 Harris Interactive poll found that 10% of adults "largely follow a vegetarian-inclined diet," with 3.2% following a vegetarian diet and 0.5% identifying as vegans. A 2000 Zogby Poll found that 2.5% of respondents reported not eating meat, poultry, or fish; while 4.5 percent reported not eating meat.)  Way less than 1% of the American public keeps Kosher, do you tell your Conservative and Orthodox Jewish friends they're SOL?

But again, a host is required to serve a meal to their guest if it's meal time; so I don't disagree that there should be a veggie meal and/or openness to hearing guests' dietary concerns.

But it is NOT required for the host to give everyone a huge array of beverages.


And back on the meal...
While I think a host should definitely host a veggie option... that doesn't mean it's going to be everyone's favorite. Maybe it's pasta with fungus in it. Then I'm out. (Or last wedding I went to, my staple, chicken, was cooked in a lemon juice with raspberries... fruity chicken = icky death. One of my biggest food aversions). But I don't think it's the host's responsibility to contact every single guest and make sure everyone is 100% happy with every specific in the food and drink.

Well in that same vein... not everyone is going to be happy with the type of drinks. But as long as there is water, the host is keeping people hydrated.


I still think diabetics are a corner case but let's go with that for a sec. You are invited to a dinner party. Pretend you are a diabetic but that hosts of a party may not know.
You go to the house and this happens:

Host: Would you like some wine?
You: No thank you.
Host: How about a beer?
You: No thank you.
Host: How about some lemonade?
You: No thank you
Host: How about some punch?
You: No thank you.
Host: Water?
You: Sure, thanks. (But thinking "Gosh, what a rude host! Not having iced tea!")

I really hope not.



If a non-sugary, non-water option is available to the host at a non-exorbitant fee, then sure. Tack that on there. But I think it's really unfair to call someone a poor host for not getting extra drinks when water is good for everyone, including diabetics.

To the bolded: What is with the need to reframe the other side of the argument into some extreme position? Of course no one would agree with the bold, because no one freaking said that.  

VulgarGirl

PrettyGirlLost said:

Liatris2010 said:

I call them cake and coffee receptions. Who would wash down frosting with fruit punch? Gross.

Who actually eats the frosting?  Gross!

You and me gonna have words.

VulgarGirl

Jen4948 said:

Bullshit. If I were diabetic and the only fucking things I could eat or drink at a wedding were bread and water "because everyone can eat/drink them" but there were a slew of sugary options for everyone else, I'm going to question whether or not I want to continue a relationship with the "host." That's being fucking inconsiderate.

Well actually Jen a diabetic might not be able to eat bread. The carbs in bread could raise their sugar levels, in fact for some diabetics things like bread can be a bigger concern then just having sugar. And not all diabetics have to be completely sugar free. Each diabetic person is different and manages their insulin levels differently, depending on what they and their endo have figured out works best for them.

Jen4948

VulgarGirl said:

Jen4948 said:

Bullshit. If I were diabetic and the only fucking things I could eat or drink at a wedding were bread and water "because everyone can eat/drink them" but there were a slew of sugary options for everyone else, I'm going to question whether or not I want to continue a relationship with the "host." That's being fucking inconsiderate.

Well actually Jen a diabetic might not be able to eat bread. The carbs in bread could raise their sugar levels, in fact for some diabetics things like bread can be a bigger concern then just having sugar. And not all diabetics have to be completely sugar free. Each diabetic person is different and manages their insulin levels differently, depending on what they and their endo have figured out works best for them.

The point is, if the only option you have for a diabetic is water but a slew of options for everyone else, it's still pretty fucking inconsiderate of their needs.

PrettyGirlLost

VulgarGirl said:

PrettyGirlLost said:

Liatris2010 said:

I call them cake and coffee receptions. Who would wash down frosting with fruit punch? Gross.

Who actually eats the frosting?  Gross!

You and me gonna have words.

Do you just want my frosting instead?

lyndausvi

This is how I view the situation.

If as a guest I went to a wedding that only had punch, lemonade and water.  I would drink the water.    Water is my normal drink of choice.  Sure it would be nice if they had something like tea as a non-sugary options, but no big deal.

As someone who gives advice on hosting.   One who thinks of themselves as a gracious host One who takes into consideration the wants and needs of my guests.  I would always recommend a variety of options to cater to a broader audience within one's budget.    

.

There are a lot of people who have issues with sugary drinks.  So I would suggest having a sugary and non-sugary option.   If you are having punches I would say tea and punch or lemonade. In most cases iced tea is about or even lower cost then a punch.   If you are having soda I would make sure you also had club soda. 

I consider water and necessity rather than an option. I fell like it's a given over and above the other options.

VulgarGirl

PrettyGirlLost said:

VulgarGirl said:

PrettyGirlLost said:

Liatris2010 said:

I call them cake and coffee receptions. Who would wash down frosting with fruit punch? Gross.

Who actually eats the frosting?  Gross!

You and me gonna have words.

Do you just want my frosting instead?

Way better plan. 

Kahlyla

I mean, I get it. I like hosting properly and appropriately. I was a little stunned to see that, in some people's minds, appropriate hosting seems to necessitate pop/soda. It's never seemed like a necessity to me, more a thing that's offered at kids' birthday parties and pizza places. Do people often serve soda at their dinner parties? I always have an assortment in the house, diet included, and will happily provide it to anyone, but I've never thought of it as a requirement for good hosting.

My venue, for example, did not have any sort of bar. There were no taps, no fountains. If there had been soda fountains, I would have used them, but it was the type of venue where beverages could be self-catered, so I wasn't about to bring in a bunch of plastic 2 Litres or cans in ice buckets. Everything we wanted, we needed to supply ourselves and think of some nice way to display it.

That being said, we had white wine, red wine, sparkling wine, beer, vodka-lemonade punch, iced tea with fresh lemon, bottled still water, bottled sparkling water, juice boxes for any kids who wanted them, coffee (provided by the caterer) and an assortment of hot teas (provided by the caterer). This was also in the early afternoon, not an all-night reception. Am I seriously being a lousy host by not having diet coke or sprite?

madamerwin

Kahlyla said:

I mean, I get it. I like hosting properly and appropriately. I was a little stunned to see that, in some people's minds, appropriate hosting seems to necessitate pop/soda. It's never seemed like a necessity to me, more a thing that's offered at kids' birthday parties and pizza places. Do people often serve soda at their dinner parties? I always have an assortment in the house, diet included, and will happily provide it to anyone, but I've never thought of it as a requirement for good hosting.

My venue, for example, did not have any sort of bar. There were no taps, no fountains. If there had been soda fountains, I would have used them, but it was the type of venue where beverages could be self-catered, so I wasn't about to bring in a bunch of plastic 2 Litres or cans in ice buckets. Everything we wanted, we needed to supply ourselves and think of some nice way to display it.

That being said, we had white wine, red wine, sparkling wine, beer, vodka-lemonade punch, iced tea with fresh lemon, bottled still water, bottled sparkling water, juice boxes for any kids who wanted them, coffee (provided by the caterer) and an assortment of hot teas (provided by the caterer). This was also in the early afternoon, not an all-night reception. Am I seriously being a lousy host by not having diet coke or sprite?

Yes, you're a terrible host and your wedding was not legitimate because you did not have all of the sodas.

Viczaesar

Kahlyla said:

I mean, I get it. I like hosting properly and appropriately. I was a little stunned to see that, in some people's minds, appropriate hosting seems to necessitate pop/soda. It's never seemed like a necessity to me, more a thing that's offered at kids' birthday parties and pizza places. Do people often serve soda at their dinner parties? I always have an assortment in the house, diet included, and will happily provide it to anyone, but I've never thought of it as a requirement for good hosting.

My venue, for example, did not have any sort of bar. There were no taps, no fountains. If there had been soda fountains, I would have used them, but it was the type of venue where beverages could be self-catered, so I wasn't about to bring in a bunch of plastic 2 Litres or cans in ice buckets. Everything we wanted, we needed to supply ourselves and think of some nice way to display it.

That being said, we had white wine, red wine, sparkling wine, beer, vodka-lemonade punch, iced tea with fresh lemon, bottled still water, bottled sparkling water, juice boxes for any kids who wanted them, coffee (provided by the caterer) and an assortment of hot teas (provided by the caterer). This was also in the early afternoon, not an all-night reception. Am I seriously being a lousy host by not having diet coke or sprite?

You have plenty of non-sweetened options, so no, you're not being a lousy host by not having diet coke or sprite.

Knottie1426704856

Damned if you do, and damned if you don't