Earn cash as you plan. Get a $20 gift card for every 200 points with The Knot Rewards
Wedding Vows & Ceremony Discussions
Honorary Groomsmen
My finace has a ton of friends and we would love for them to all be in the wedding party, but are going to keep it to family only. But we really want them to be honored. My idea was during the ceremony to ask them to rise as we have the officiant read a little something. Anyone have any more suggestions???
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Honorary Groomsmen
I would love advice from some fun, offbeat, unique, young brides!
Thanks!
[QUOTE]I would love advice from some fun, offbeat, unique, young brides! Thanks!
Posted by AggieColey[/QUOTE]
<div>So anybody who thinks this is a bad idea is old and not fun? </div>
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Honorary Groomsmen : No, we're old, no fun, AND cookie cutter copy cats.
Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]
<div>Dammit. And here I thought I was cool and YOUNEEK with my uneven sides, ring bearer and no flower girl, bridesmaids with no MOH, husband wearing his facial piercings (at the reception), Star Wars Recessional, and female best man. Bah. </div>
You know you're not legally married because you had uneven sides. That's how it works, right?
OP, what constitutes "young" for you?
<blockquote class="Quote"><div class="QuoteText"> </div><div class="QuoteText"> </div></blockquote>
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:Honorary Groomsmen: You know you're not legally married because you had uneven sides. That's how it works, right?
Posted by Simply Fated[/QUOTE]
<div>I do. I like it that way, though. I like to pretend I am married while I secretly live in sin. Andplusalso, it means I can have a do-over if I want!</div>
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:Honorary Groomsmen : I do. I like it that way, though. I like to pretend I am married while I secretly live in sin. Andplusalso, it means I can have a do-over if I want!
Posted by AddieL73[/QUOTE]
It's a win-win situation!
[QUOTE]My finace has a ton of friends and we would love for them to all be in the wedding party, but are going to keep it to family only. But we really want them to be honored. My idea was during the ceremony to ask them to rise as we have the officiant read a little something. Anyone have any more suggestions???
Posted by AggieColey[/QUOTE]
<div>I was having trouble pulling my bridal party down to six (which I had to do due to seating issues) and I'm just going to tell her how it is. You want them to participate but you can't. Done deal. I agree with everyone else, pointing out that they are second best is just going to make them uncomfortable. Also, everyone hates being singled out. Remember in school when the teacher made you stand up and introduce yourself at the beginning of the school year? Mortifying. Don't do that to your friends.</div><div>
</div><div>Also, I hope that being 25 and not having a flower girl makes me young, unique and offbeat enough for you :P</div>
Hey OP, ever notice how many people give you unsolicited advice about your wedding? Family and strangers just out of nowhere saying "Oh you HAVE to do this!" You know why? Because it's a very important event by which people will measure you. It's a test of your social skills.
And believe me, if you fail, NOBODY CARES if you were offbeat, or hip. You know what they will do? Judge you. All the little paper lanterns in the world won't make people feel less slighted, or angry with you if you spite them at your event. Your 'special day' is the source of an inside family joke for years to come because you cared more about 'being cool' than your friends and familys' feelings.
My cousins thought they were 'hip" and "cool" with their weddings. And they would have been.... if they hadn't just murdered etiquette, and offended the heck out of 90% of the family. To this day, certain family members won't invite them to events, won't talk to them, and they are essentially shunned.
Also, before you go insulting married people, and telling them how old and unwanted they are, remember that you are on the cusp of becoming one yourself. I pity you if you see so little value in your future self. Will you loathe yourself? Consider your own thoughts unworthy and 'Old' just because you have a ring? I have to say, that's kind of psycho.
Just a quick question...where does 27 (and 7 months!) fall on the old/young continuum?
[QUOTE]My finace has a ton of friends and we would love for them to all be in the wedding party, but are going to keep it to family only. But we really want them to be honored. My idea was during the ceremony to ask them to rise as we have the officiant read a little something. Anyone have any more suggestions???
Posted by AggieColey[/QUOTE]
Don't do this. They are either in your wedding party or they're not. Not only will you make them feel like second class gm, you will make your other guests feel like second class guests.
I'd suggest you have your photographer take a picture of your husband with his friends, but you probably won't listen to me, either. I'm old, not much fun anymore and you should feel sorry for my husband.
The attendants are "honorary" to begin with. There is no legal or religious reason to have these people in the wedding party. All you need are willing bride, groom, officiant and someone to witness the vows. Every other attendant is "honorary."
To a 20 year old this is an old fogey. To a 40 year old this is unbelievably young.