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Etiquette

Thanking for gift pre-wedding

peachy13peachy13 in my cubicle, doing very important work member
1000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
My coworker kindly bought something off our registry and it was just sent to my house today. I see her first thing in the morning and was going to thank her in person for her lovely gift.

Now it's the question of when to send her a proper thank you card. My wedding is still a month away and I'm not sure if this coworker is attending or not as I'm still waiting for her RSVP. Do I: a) wait and see if she's going, then wait until after wedding to send a thank you card to her for coming and for her gift? Or b) if she's not going, send a card now? Or c) send her a card now regardless of her response? And then does she get another card if she does attend the wedding?

Overthinking this for sure but she's sort of my boss and I want to do this right.

Thanks!
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Re: Thanking for gift pre-wedding

  • Option C. Send the thank you card now no matter what.

    No thank you card after she attends the wedding, as PP said.

    STARMOON44peachy13
  • peachy13peachy13 in my cubicle, doing very important work member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
    Thanks all, I think I knew the answer. Just second guessing myself on everything. THank you!
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    Pupatella
  • julieanne912julieanne912 member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer
    edited September 2015
    The only gifts I didn't send a thank you for immediately were the ones that arrived in the week or so before the wedding (working my way through thank you notes this week).  Other than that, a card was in the mail the next day.  I also think since she's your co-worker, you can just give her the card in person.  
    Married 9.12.15
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  • The only gifts I didn't send a thank you for immediately were the ones that arrived in the week or so before the wedding (working my way through thank you notes this week).  Other than that, a card was in the mail the next day.  I also think since she's your co-worker, you can just give her the card in person.  

    This is what I did too. No way I was going to write TY notes the week of the wedding, so those I'm working on now with the regular wedding ones. Everyone else got a TY note within a week of us receiving their gift (some as early as 2 or 3 months before the wedding). It felt weird to me writing thank yous for a gift for an event that hadn't happened yet, but I went with it since it seems like an established etiquette rule.

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  • lyndausvilyndausvi Western Slope, Colorado mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its
    The only gifts I didn't send a thank you for immediately were the ones that arrived in the week or so before the wedding (working my way through thank you notes this week).  Other than that, a card was in the mail the next day.  I also think since she's your co-worker, you can just give her the card in person.  

    This is what I did too. No way I was going to write TY notes the week of the wedding, so those I'm working on now with the regular wedding ones. Everyone else got a TY note within a week of us receiving their gift (some as early as 2 or 3 months before the wedding). It felt weird to me writing thank yous for a gift for an event that hadn't happened yet, but I went with it since it seems like an established etiquette rule.
    I wrote out TY the week of the wedding.  It took all of a few minutes, but it was one less thing I had to deal with when I returned.








    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
    charlottesmom0626
  • I'm with you @lyndausvi ;

    I keep a stack of thank you cards already stamped and return addressed. It's super easy for me to fill it out as soon as I open the gift and pop it in the mail. 
    lyndausvi
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