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Thanking for gift pre-wedding

peachy13peachy13 member
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in Wedding Etiquette Forum
My coworker kindly bought something off our registry and it was just sent to my house today. I see her first thing in the morning and was going to thank her in person for her lovely gift.

Now it's the question of when to send her a proper thank you card. My wedding is still a month away and I'm not sure if this coworker is attending or not as I'm still waiting for her RSVP. Do I: a) wait and see if she's going, then wait until after wedding to send a thank you card to her for coming and for her gift? Or b) if she's not going, send a card now? Or c) send her a card now regardless of her response? And then does she get another card if she does attend the wedding?

Overthinking this for sure but she's sort of my boss and I want to do this right.

Thanks!
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Re: Thanking for gift pre-wedding

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    PupatellaPupatella member
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    Option C. Send the thank you card now no matter what.

    No thank you card after she attends the wedding, as PP said.

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    peachy13peachy13 member
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    Thanks all, I think I knew the answer. Just second guessing myself on everything. THank you!
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    julieanne912julieanne912 member
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    edited September 2015
    The only gifts I didn't send a thank you for immediately were the ones that arrived in the week or so before the wedding (working my way through thank you notes this week).  Other than that, a card was in the mail the next day.  I also think since she's your co-worker, you can just give her the card in person.  
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    charcoalandblushcharcoalandblush member
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    julieanne912 said:
    The only gifts I didn't send a thank you for immediately were the ones that arrived in the week or so before the wedding (working my way through thank you notes this week).  Other than that, a card was in the mail the next day.  I also think since she's your co-worker, you can just give her the card in person.  

    This is what I did too. No way I was going to write TY notes the week of the wedding, so those I'm working on now with the regular wedding ones. Everyone else got a TY note within a week of us receiving their gift (some as early as 2 or 3 months before the wedding). It felt weird to me writing thank yous for a gift for an event that hadn't happened yet, but I went with it since it seems like an established etiquette rule.

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    lyndausvilyndausvi mod
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    charcoalandblush said:
    julieanne912 said:
    The only gifts I didn't send a thank you for immediately were the ones that arrived in the week or so before the wedding (working my way through thank you notes this week).  Other than that, a card was in the mail the next day.  I also think since she's your co-worker, you can just give her the card in person.  

    This is what I did too. No way I was going to write TY notes the week of the wedding, so those I'm working on now with the regular wedding ones. Everyone else got a TY note within a week of us receiving their gift (some as early as 2 or 3 months before the wedding). It felt weird to me writing thank yous for a gift for an event that hadn't happened yet, but I went with it since it seems like an established etiquette rule.
    I wrote out TY the week of the wedding.  It took all of a few minutes, but it was one less thing I had to deal with when I returned.








    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
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    charlottesmom0626charlottesmom0626 member
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    I'm with you @lyndausvi

    I keep a stack of thank you cards already stamped and return addressed. It's super easy for me to fill it out as soon as I open the gift and pop it in the mail. 
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