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Thank you!

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Re: Thank you!

  • OliveOilsMomOliveOilsMom South Jersey member
    Eighth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers

    You are not the only person on earth to have student loans.  I graduated college in 2004 and am still paying them.  H graduated college more recently (2011) and is still paying his loans too.  It's a part of life for most college students, so don't act no one else has ever had a student loan in the history of ever.

    Pay for the wedding you can afford and go on the honeymoon you can afford.  If that's only a weekend away via a Groupon escape, so be it. 

  • kvruns said:
    Are we being punked!?

    Yes. Figure it is just a troll. I'm actually surprised at the # of real answers given
    I'm assuming it's a troll post but I'm hoping if we all answer seriously, some very special snowflake will Google this and find the thread. Not that it would change her mind most likely, but still. 


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    emmaaakvruns
  • How do people not know that begging for money is tacky, especially when it's for wants and not needs? Just cause it comes in the form of a website instead of standing on the side of the highway doesn't make it not tacky.  If you wouldn't go stand on the side of an on-ramp with a sign in below freezing temps for it, you definitely shouldn't be creating a go fund me for it.

    For crying out loud...so is this what society is expected to do now?  Reward people for their shitty life choices and failure to plan?  
    sparklepants41MyNameIsNot
  • No way this isn't a troll.  It is just too perfect
  • Ok, so here's the deal. My fiancé and I are a young couple. I just graduated from college in 2012. I have never been well-off and both my parents and I had to take out loans to pay for my college education. I'm a dancer and went to school in New York to earn my bachelor's in dance. While I was in college, however, I only worked enough to pay for groceries; not enough to save for the future. When I graduated, I had to go stay with a friend about 30 minutes outside of the city, where I worked. This allowed me time to save money to pay for rent. However, soon after moving into my own apartment, the loan payments were due. After 3 years of living paycheck to paycheck, I decided to move back home with my parents. I'm finally able to save up money, but I still have student loan payments to make.

    My fiancé and I want to have a small City Hall wedding with a nice dinner. We've decided that a practical budget is $3,500. But then there's the honeymoon. We haven't yet set a date on the wedding because we want to save up enough money to go on a nice honeymoon to Hawaii. But I don't want to be engaged for 2 years while we wait to have enough money.

    So, would it be tacky, in our specific situation, for us to start a Go Fund Me page for our small wedding?

    I feel you, I really do. But you've got to reevaluate. My husband and I live in NYC, I know how expensive everything is. We had a City Hall wedding because we couldn't afford a big party with all our bills and his student loan payments. We took our 11 guests out for a nice lunch after our ceremony and we had a professional photographer, we had nice outfits and I bought a bouquet and veil and our budget, including our honeymoon, is your entire wedding budget. You can cut corners, $3,500 for a City Hall wedding alone is wayyyy too much, especially when you're considering begging your friends and family for money for a vacation. We had to postpone our honeymoon in order to save for our honeymoon, it never crossed our minds to beg for cash from our friends and family, that's rude and tacky and a great way to sour relationships.

    You didn't "just graduate", you graduated 4 years ago, you could have done an entire 'nother degree in the time since you left school, stop trying to play the poor student pity card and accept that you need to reevaluate your priorities and make sacrifices. You're not entitled to a $3,500 wedding, you're not entitled to a "nice honeymoon to Hawaii", you're not entitled to your friends and families hard earned money just because you think you are entitled to all that other stuff.
    OliveOilsMomhellohkb
  • As PP's have said, this might be a troll...but just in case...YES babe, it's TACKY as all HELL LOL
  • Like others, you mostly lost me at "just graduated" in 2012 (well, what ever was left after the words "gofundme"). You've been out of school almost as long as you were in school, so that excuse ship has sailed.

    GoFundMe is appropriate for charities. It is also appropriate in truly unique situations (medical bills, lost my house in a fire, etc.) that are generally centered on other fundraising efforts. It is for necessities. It is not for optional events.

    "Your situation" is the exact same situation every couple who wants a GoFundMe for their wedding finds themselves in: "I don't have enough money for the wedding I want". It's that simple. Your situation is not unique or special. Throw the wedding you can afford. Better yet? Elope and combine that wedding + honeymoon into one trip. But there is no situation where it's appropriate to ask anyone to fund an optional day. And, yes, a wedding is optional.


    hellohkbInLoveInQueens
  • You know, OP, not only is it tacky and rude af to ask people to give you money for something you don't need, but it's also extremely rude to delete your post.
    Not to mention pointless, since you have been quoted multiple times.
    InLoveInQueensMyNameIsNot
  • thisismynickname2thisismynickname2 City By The Lake member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    You know, OP, not only is it tacky and rude af to ask people to give you money for something you don't need, but it's also extremely rude to delete your post.
    Not to mention pointless, since you have been quoted multiple times.
    Oh well, at least she changed the title to Thank You instead of any other bat-signal. There's hope! 
    ________________________________


    hellohkbsparklepants41
  • You know, OP, not only is it tacky and rude af to ask people to give you money for something you don't need, but it's also extremely rude to delete your post.
    Not to mention pointless, since you have been quoted multiple times.
    Oh well, at least she changed the title to Thank You instead of any other bat-signal. There's hope! 
    Yes! Or those passive-aggressive smiley faces.
  • She is gonna have to change her user name or never post again!
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  • emmaaa said:
    levioosa said:
    "Just graduated in 2012."

    No, "just graduated" is like, May 2015, and even that's stretching it at this point.  You've been out of college for 4 years.  
    Thank you! She's probably been out of college for longer than she was in college at this point. 
    PREACH! I graduated in May 2013. I'm not sure how 4 year post grad qualifies as "just" out of college or a special situation.
    I graduated in May 2014. Even I don't consider myself "just graduated."  In my opinion, you can only consider yourself just graduated until the next class graduates. 
    That seems to me to be the wrong mentality to have if you're seeking to get out on your own and away from your parents. 

    I try to distance myself from college and just having graduated as much as possible because I want to be seen as a career-oriented, mature, responsible, person willing to work hard and start at the bottom if necessary (and to clarify, I believe that I was and am that, even shortly after I graduated, and I believe many recent college grads are that, but there seems to be a perception that they are not.)

    emmaaa
  • flantasticflantastic The Midwest member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I just want to look into my crystal ball and tell GFM brides how this is going to go:

    1) You don't create or post a GFM page. You pay for your own wedding. All relationships stay intact.
    2) You create a GFM and post it to Facebook or send it out to your friends and family. No one donates, except maybe your parents donate a hundred bucks or two to help you save face, and one friend who sends you $20. A few of your friends are so shocked at your tackiness that they slowly distance themselves from you.
       2a) You realize what a horribly tacky thing you have done, and take it down, and pay for your own wedding. Little further damage is done.
       2b) You keep harassing people to donate, as if you are a charity. Everyone slowly begins to hate you and your entitlement. By the time of the wedding, you either have no friends left or the few who are still planning to be friends with you are making excuses for your ridiculously entitled behavior. You still only have $200 from the GFM, because everyone else realizes that it is not their responsibility to pay for your wedding.
    InLoveInQueenssparklepants41emmaaa[Deleted User]
  • Huh. I just went back into school this year and got me some brand new loans. So by OPs' reasoning, I'm probably entitled to this behavior, right?:



    Honeymoon to Europe, here I come. 
                        


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