Help! Too Many Bridesmaids

Knottie1453771707

Before I even got engaged I had no less than 7 friends personally ask if they could be a bridesmaid. Now I can only imagine taking on 4 bridesmaids for my 75 person wedding. How do I ask the remaining 3 girls to be involved in different ways in the wedding without them feeling disappointed?

justsie

Knottie1453771707 said:

Before I even got engaged I had no less than 7 friends personally ask if they could be a bridesmaid. Now I can only imagine taking on 4 bridesmaids for my 75 person wedding. How do I ask the remaining 3 girls to be involved in different ways in the wedding without them feeling disappointed?

Ask the 4 you want to be bridesmaids to be bridesmaids, it was rude of your friends to ask you to be a part of the wedding. If you want the other 3 to have a part in the wedding doing a reading is the only other option. 

[Deleted User]

Ask who you want.  Hypothetical "when you get married, I want to be your bridesmaid" conversations are not valid.  But don't make up crappy jobs to make these extra people feel involved.  "Guest" is a perfectly fine role.

levioosa

If you want them in your WP, ask them.  If you don't, the only other acceptable roles are "reader" during the ceremony, or guest.  

floridabride44

What everyone else said.

Also, wait until about 9 months before your wedding to ask the four girls that you do want as BMs. No sooner. Friendships change and you don't want to be stuck with BMs who you've drifted apart from.

CMGragain

It is very presumptuous to ask to be in someone's wedding party.  It puts you in an awkward position, which is why it is rude.
Ignore your friends good, but misplaced intentions, and choose your bridesmaids about 9 months out.

AddieCake

Ditto everyone above. You are not obligated to find ways to include all those ladies who assumed they would be in your wedding party.

Jen4948

Like everyone else says, you don't have to accommodate every request from someone to be in your wedding party.  But you can invite everyone to a bachelorette party or shower, assuming you are inviting them all to the wedding, and they can all get ready with you.

SP29

Another option, is that one or two of them could sign your marriage license as your witnesses. 

You are not obligated to include all of them- it was rude of them to ask you to be a BM. 

kmmssg

When they mentioned this did you say "of course you will be a bridesmaid!?

Knottie1453771707

There was never confirmation when they would ask. It was mostly met with just nervous laughter.

Thanks everyone for your responses! I can see now what they did was rude and put me in an uncomfortable position. I shouldn't have to bend to their whims when it is my wedding.