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"Rude things people said during your engagement"

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Re: "Rude things people said during your engagement"

  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    25 Love Its 10 Comments Name Dropper First Anniversary
    chateaubradfield said:
    1) when I called my mother to tell her I was getting married, she said "to who?" ...my partner? The person I've been living with for 9 months and have been dating for a year and a half? She also RSVPed "tentatively coming"...ill post about that nonsense on another thread.

    2) a coworker--a very awkward man with little to no social skills but I've worked with him for years and felt obligated to invite him--said "I think I'll bring Anna rose as my plus one, since this is my first gay wedding, who better to attend with me than a gay coworker?" I had to tell him it's not a gay wedding. It's just a wedding. I don't drink gay coffee or drive a gay car. It's really just the same as all other weddings---music, vows, nice clothes, cake and food. And lots of booze. 

    Something tells me this won't be the last of these types of comments like the ones from your coworker.  I'm sure he meant well, but people often don't think before speaking.  You seem strong and level headed, so I am sure you will handle them well!
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  • laurad75laurad75 member
    250 Love Its Third Anniversary 100 Comments Name Dropper
    This wasn't said directly to me but I was standing right behind my FFIL at a party after FI and I got engaged.  I overheard him telling someone how shocked he was that FI proposed and how he always thought FI would marry his ex-girlfriend from 20 years prior.  Ouch.  
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  • RosesAreRed13RosesAreRed13 member
    25 Love Its 10 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    We were out with a group of friends soon after we got engaged.  I really dislike our friend's girlfriend...and like her even less after all this.  She began telling me and my FI divorce statistics based on data from how much the FI spends on the ring.  Are you kidding?  Divorce statistics? You don't even know how much he spend, nor is it any of your business!  Get out of here. Don't have time for you BYE!  It's a shame, because we would like to invite this friend, but we want no part to do with his girlfriend, so it looks like they will not be invited.  
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  • scrunchythiefscrunchythief member
    Tenth Anniversary 500 Love Its 500 Comments Name Dropper
    RosesAreRed13 said:
    We were out with a group of friends soon after we got engaged.  I really dislike our friend's girlfriend...and like her even less after all this.  She began telling me and my FI divorce statistics based on data from how much the FI spends on the ring.  Are you kidding?  Divorce statistics? You don't even know how much he spend, nor is it any of your business!  Get out of here. Don't have time for you BYE!  It's a shame, because we would like to invite this friend, but we want no part to do with his girlfriend, so it looks like they will not be invited.  
    Wow, seriously?  I absolutely love statistics and can't fathom doing this.  Maybe sharing an article on it here or on FB, but not to or about a particular person.
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    25 Love Its 10 Comments Name Dropper First Anniversary
    scrunchythief said:
    RosesAreRed13 said:
    We were out with a group of friends soon after we got engaged.  I really dislike our friend's girlfriend...and like her even less after all this.  She began telling me and my FI divorce statistics based on data from how much the FI spends on the ring.  Are you kidding?  Divorce statistics? You don't even know how much he spend, nor is it any of your business!  Get out of here. Don't have time for you BYE!  It's a shame, because we would like to invite this friend, but we want no part to do with his girlfriend, so it looks like they will not be invited.  
    Wow, seriously?  I absolutely love statistics and can't fathom doing this.  Maybe sharing an article on it here or on FB, but not to or about a particular person.

    Yeah, this is super rude.  Such a Debbie Downer. 
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  • MCmeowMCmeow member
    500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 100 Comments Name Dropper
    Not something anyone said, but since we're an interracial couple (Hispanic and Asian), a lot of older people stare at us as if we did something wrong, even more so now that they see a ring on my finger. Racists suck...
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    25 Love Its 10 Comments Name Dropper First Anniversary
    JediElizabeth said:
    I've posted this before elsewhere, but my twin sister has been the worst: 

    "Do you really want to invite all your friends? Don't you think they'd ugly up the reception?"

    "I always thought you'd elope in Europe. Why would you want to get married with all those people around you?" (Referring to family and friends)

    "If you're ceremony's longer than like 5 minutes, I'm going to be up there texting next to you."

    "Do you think you'll still be with him in 3-5 years?" (We had been together for 4.5 yrs at that point.)

    Me: "Our wedding will be great fun!"
    Her: "Your divorce will be even more fun!"

    She specifically says things to get under my skin. I laugh it off until I can't stand it, then I stop talking to her for 6 mos or so - not the healthiest reaction, but it's worked the best after 30 years of trying to deal with her behavior. 

    For the record, she is not part of the wedding party. The jury's still out regarding her place on the guest list. 
    Oh, family.  I swear, none of my family except my brother would be invited if I could get away with it.
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  • randomsloverandomslove member
    250 Love Its Third Anniversary 100 Comments Name Dropper
    I have a friend who I thought was a good friend (who was married at the time and is going through a divorce now) who kept making snide comments about how stupid we are to get married, it's a waste, etc. Even if we didn't talk about the wedding around her (which we didn't), she'd still make comments about how marriage is stupid around us constantly. If it came up that we were engaged (new/mutual friends asking based on the e-ring I wear), she'd drop something like, "I keep telling them they shouldn't get married."

    ...

    We stopped being friends. She happened to move around the time I decided I didn't want to hang out with her anymore, so great timing.

    I'm sorry that I have found someone I want to make my permanent partner and see myself growing with. I'm sorry your marriage is falling apart based on the actions of you and your husband, but don't take that out on my love and I.





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  • Knottie28432175Knottie28432175 member
    Second Anniversary Name Dropper First Comment
    My dad (has been divorced from my mom since I was in elementary) was the worst, as expected. He did the "are you knocked up??" thing like @RomanceManaged, even though we've been together for 4-5 years, have lived together for 2, and have talked about marriage for a long time. I'm finishing my Master's degree this spring, and he make comments like "well you should REALLY be excited for that because THAT is something that will last your entire life!" (insinuating that the marriage won't) He's generally a very cynical guy, especially about love/marriage, but still really annoying. :/
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  • nerdwifenerdwife member
    500 Love Its 100 Comments First Answer Name Dropper
    FI and are both young-looking, despite the fact that we are both 27 (and were 26 at the time we got engaged). My mom posted this picture of us from another wedding we attended announcing our engagement/congratulating us, and more than one person commented passive aggressive things like "what a nice looking young couple." One even wrote, "look like they are going to a sweet 16 lol."

    I'm sorry, what?! It's not even as though we are actually so young that it's incredible we'd be engaged, so that made the comments even weirder.
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