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What else can I cut?

I've been engaged since 1/28/2010, so it's high time I had a wedding.  Main reasons it just hasn't happened yet are my parent's disapproval of my fiance, and the difficulty of planning anything a year in advance when you intend to switch jobs or are in a master's program.  But now that I'm in a PhD program and will be here for a while, and FH will be graduating in the fall, I want to get serious.  

My parents told me long ago that they had no intention of paying for my wedding, so I know I'm going to have to budget or DIY most of the day.  That works great for me, because I don't want many aspects of a typical wedding anyway.  In light of that, here is a list of things I'd like to cut, and I welcome any input on whether doing away with these items is feasible, or totally weird, or what.  

1.)  The bridal party.  I mean no bridesmaids, groomsmen, flower girl, or ring bearer.  I've grown apart from most of my high-school friends and have deliberately not made many more friends over the years, and my fiance doesn't have any close friends either.  There aren't any children in either family of an appropriate age to be flowergirl, and only one of an age to be ring bearer. 

2.)  Wedding arch/aisle runner.  What's the point of a wedding arch, just to be a background for all your pictures?  Why?  And why have an aisle runner when it'll just be stepped on (read: trip hazard).  The last wedding I was in, the aisle runner was a huge hassle because two young cousins of the bride were assigned to roll it out after all guests were seated, as the first bridesmaid (me) was walking up, and they couldn't figure it out and was a big delay in front of everyone.  Then the couple's child started wandering/twirling around in the middle of the ceremony and bunched it up and it was overall a mess.  People know where you're going to walk, and they know where you're going to stand.

3.)  Alcohol of any kind.  FH and I don't drink, and only very few family members drink on occasion.  

4.)  Favors.  I'm only having this wedding (instead of eloping) because certain family members said they wanted to be there.  I'm not going to bribe them with a knick-knack happy or small souvenir foodstuff just to get them to come.  The *wedding* is their favor.  

5.)  Wedding shoes.  I asked my best friend why I would want to get special wedding shoes, to be uncomfortable during an important event and have limited rewearability afterwards.  She said it's to take pictures of them, of course!  ... Buying shoes just to take pictures OF them, because it's tradition.  No.

6.)  Catering.  If at all possible, I intend to cook all the food for the reception the day before.  In lieu of having a bachelorette party, I'd invite all female family over the day before the wedding and we'd cook everything.  

7.)  Bachelorette party/bridal shower.  See above.  I hate being the center of attention, don't want to ask for gifts, and just forsee it being awkward for everyone involved.  But that one isn't actually wedding-day related, so back on topic...

8.)  Flowers.  I intend to make a bouquet of paper flowers (using sheet music from when FH and I were in band together) and any other flowers would also be paper flowers.  Centerpieces will be decorated stacks of books, since FH and I are huge nerds and like to read, and if needed I will make paper flowers to accent those.


That's all I can think of at the moment.  Does anyone else have any expenses they think are unnecessary?  



«13

Re: What else can I cut?

  • kylexokylexo Finger Lakes, NY member
    500 Love Its Third Anniversary 100 Comments Name Dropper
    I've been engaged since 1/28/2010, so it's high time I had a wedding.  Main reasons it just hasn't happened yet are my parent's disapproval of my fiance, and the difficulty of planning anything a year in advance when you intend to switch jobs or are in a master's program.  But now that I'm in a PhD program and will be here for a while, and FH will be graduating in the fall, I want to get serious.  

    My parents told me long ago that they had no intention of paying for my wedding, so I know I'm going to have to budget or DIY most of the day.  That works great for me, because I don't want many aspects of a typical wedding anyway.  In light of that, here is a list of things I'd like to cut, and I welcome any input on whether doing away with these items is feasible, or totally weird, or what.  

    1.)  The bridal party.  I mean no bridesmaids, groomsmen, flower girl, or ring bearer.  I've grown apart from most of my high-school friends and have deliberately not made many more friends over the years, and my fiance doesn't have any close friends either.  There aren't any children in either family of an appropriate age to be flowergirl, and only one of an age to be ring bearer. 

    2.)  Wedding arch/aisle runner.  What's the point of a wedding arch, just to be a background for all your pictures?  Why?  And why have an aisle runner when it'll just be stepped on (read: trip hazard).  The last wedding I was in, the aisle runner was a huge hassle because two young cousins of the bride were assigned to roll it out after all guests were seated, as the first bridesmaid (me) was walking up, and they couldn't figure it out and was a big delay in front of everyone.  Then the couple's child started wandering/twirling around in the middle of the ceremony and bunched it up and it was overall a mess.  People know where you're going to walk, and they know where you're going to stand.

    3.)  Alcohol of any kind.  FH and I don't drink, and only very few family members drink on occasion.  

    4.)  Favors.  I'm only having this wedding (instead of eloping) because certain family members said they wanted to be there.  I'm not going to bribe them with a knick-knack happy or small souvenir foodstuff just to get them to come.  The *wedding* is their favor.  

    5.)  Wedding shoes.  I asked my best friend why I would want to get special wedding shoes, to be uncomfortable during an important event and have limited rewearability afterwards.  She said it's to take pictures of them, of course!  ... Buying shoes just to take pictures OF them, because it's tradition.  No.

    6.)  Catering.  If at all possible, I intend to cook all the food for the reception the day before.  In lieu of having a bachelorette party, I'd invite all female family over the day before the wedding and we'd cook everything.  

    7.)  Bachelorette party/bridal shower.  See above.  I hate being the center of attention, don't want to ask for gifts, and just forsee it being awkward for everyone involved.  But that one isn't actually wedding-day related, so back on topic...

    8.)  Flowers.  I intend to make a bouquet of paper flowers (using sheet music from when FH and I were in band together) and any other flowers would also be paper flowers.  Centerpieces will be decorated stacks of books, since FH and I are huge nerds and like to read, and if needed I will make paper flowers to accent those.


    That's all I can think of at the moment.  Does anyone else have any expenses they think are unnecessary?  



    All of this stuff is fine except the bolded. Expecting others to help prepare food to eat at the reception is a lot of expect. It's one thing if they offer, but that's assuming they show up, aren't sick, etc. You'd be better off having a cake and punch style reception or getting catering trays or something and just having snacks.

    Also, Bachelorette parties and Showers are thrown by those who love you, not you. They shouldn't cost you anything and you only have them if someone offers to throw them.

    I like the idea for your flowers and decor. Wedding arches can be made for cheap/free if you really want them though. My dad cut branches off a tree in our yard to make the arch for my sisters wedding. It was absolutely beautiful and meant so much more since my dad made it for her and her H.
    SP29STARMOON44
  • Ways we are saving money is by holding a brunch reception, no alcohol and no dj/dancing. Instead of dancing we will be setting up yard games. 
  • How many ppl are on your guestlist?
                 
  • levioosalevioosa Southern California member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    #6 is a hard no.  Your guests should not be required to pay or work for your wedding in any way.  There are also plenty of catering options that are cheap and don't require work from anyone.  Italian places often have great cheap catering options.  


    image
    [Deleted User]OurWildKingdomSTARMOON44
  • Agree with all PPs re: #6.

    When are you thinking of having your wedding? A Sunday afternoon may be less expensive than Saturday, and venues are often cheaper in the winter than summer. 

    kittykyat
  • CMGragainCMGragain member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    edited March 2016
    Have a mid-afternoon ceremony followed by a cake and punch reception.  This is very traditional.  Your grandmother was probably married like this. The cake can come from the grocery store, Costco or Sam's club.  Nobody has to cook.  If you want more, serve veggie trays and tea sandwiches or sandwich wraps.

    Asking friends and family to cook for your wedding is just as bad as asking for money.  Don't do it!

    Remember: what is needed for a wedding is a couple who is legally able to get married, a license, an officiant, and legal witnesses.  Everything else, including guests, is optional, but if you do have guests, you must have a reception.  My sister was married in a city park, wearing a borrowed dress and veil.  They served picnic food from the grocery store.  Great wedding!
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
    OurWildKingdomtigerlily6SP29
  • climbingwifeclimbingwife NYC 'burbs member
    10000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Do not invite your friends over to cook food for your wedding. 
    <insert Stephanie Tanner HOW RUDE>

    [Deleted User]
  • CMGragainCMGragain member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    edited March 2016
    Cost cutting suggestions that are polite:

    Vistaprint for invitations.  Yes, you need paper invitations!  You can also make them yourself, or buy inexpensive kits on sale at Michaels or Hobby Lobby.  RSVPs are optional.  You can use a website for that, but be ready to make some phone calls for people who forget to respond.

    Borrow your veil from a married friend.  They all look alike to most people.

    IPOD for music.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
    OurWildKingdom
  • Agree with PPs. A very simple wedding is easy to do, but hosting your guests properly is important. I love to cook, but I would never want to devote my whole day to cook food for a wedding that I'm in or going to as a guest. I'd also be worried about keeping the food at a safe temperature. Go with a cake and punch reception and it will probably be even less expensive than buying all the food that you were going to cook yourself.
    OurWildKingdom[Deleted User]
  • OurWildKingdomOurWildKingdom in the 216 member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    CMGragain said:
    Cost cutting suggestions that are polite:

    Borrow your veil from a married friend.  They all look alike to most people.


    That way you have something borrowed and (depending on how long said friend or family member has been married) something old.
  • MesmrEweMesmrEwe member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited March 2016

    Another "NO GO" on #6!!!!!!  Here's why (besides food safety) - you can go to Subway or KFC or Famous Dave's or the local grocery store deli or your local Chinese/Italian/ethic restaurant - and get 100% of all food catered in for a super reasonable price!  You don't have the food ingredient cost but you do get the benefit of their buying/purchasing power and their staff.  You also get your guests to be at your event as guests and not servants.  Bonus points if your local restaurant will have someone you can hire to stay with the food to bring it out/serve/refill and tip them generously.  Hiring a caterer also takes care of someone doing the bulk of the cleanup and many of the rentals (linens, china, silverware, glasses) for less than you can purchase/rent.  The day of the wedding you're the bride, you're the hostess, you don't have the time in the days leading up to the wedding to add this element and it sounds like your backstage crew isn't going to have your back nor should they be asked to work instead of enjoy the day.  In the incredibly unlikely event someone gets sick and you're the person in charge of the food, it's your liability, if someone picks up something from a licensed business, it's theirs...  Plus, many venues won't allow you to bring in DIY food.  Yes, order a cake from Sam's or Super Target using whipped icing (double the number they say you'll need because their portions are insanely small) to save on your budget.  Be aware you'll need to pick it up/deliver/set-up at the venue but if you're careful it can be done if you follow their instructions (and have access to a hatch type vehicle)...

    As for flowers, decide what you want to spend and have a florist make it for you if you did want real.  Yes, you can call a florist and say "I need a bout for FI and bouquet for our wedding, my budget is $$ for both" or if you have a small budget and want to work your paper flowers in you can do that too just to spice it up a bit... and you will have something nice (you can even order from places like FTD and have it delivered - FTD has a club that for ~$20 you get free delivery for the entire year on all orders). 

    As with any DIY project, do it because you love it and already have the supplies/materials on-hand.  Nickels and dimes add up to real money really quickly to the point that you often end up spending more money than it'd been to hire out something nice from a vendor who does it once and you don't have the cost of the value of your time.

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    OurWildKingdom
  • kylexokylexo Finger Lakes, NY member
    500 Love Its Third Anniversary 100 Comments Name Dropper
    MesmrEwe said:

    Another "NO GO" on #6!!!!!!  Here's why (besides food safety) - you can go to Subway or KFC or Famous Dave's or the local grocery store deli or your local Chinese/Italian/ethic restaurant - and get 100% of all food catered in for a super reasonable price!  You don't have the food ingredient cost but you do get the benefit of their buying/purchasing power and their staff.  You also get your guests to be at your event as guests and not servants.  Bonus points if your local restaurant will have someone you can hire to stay with the food to bring it out/serve/refill and tip them generously.  Hiring a caterer also takes care of someone doing the bulk of the cleanup and many of the rentals (linens, china, silverware, glasses) for less than you can purchase/rent.  The day of the wedding you're the bride, you're the hostess, you don't have the time in the days leading up to the wedding to add this element and it sounds like your backstage crew isn't going to have your back nor should they be asked to work instead of enjoy the day.  In the incredibly unlikely event someone gets sick and you're the person in charge of the food, it's your liability, if someone picks up something from a licensed business, it's theirs...  Plus, many venues won't allow you to bring in DIY food.  Yes, order a cake from Sam's or Super Target using whipped icing (double the number they say you'll need because their portions are insanely small) to save on your budget.  Be aware you'll need to pick it up/deliver/set-up at the venue but if you're careful it can be done if you follow their instructions (and have access to a hatch type vehicle)...

    As for flowers, decide what you want to spend and have a florist make it for you if you did want real.  Yes, you can call a florist and say "I need a bout for FI and bouquet for our wedding, my budget is $$ for both" or if you have a small budget and want to work your paper flowers in you can do that too just to spice it up a bit... and you will have something nice (you can even order from places like FTD and have it delivered - FTD has a club that for ~$20 you get free delivery for the entire year on all orders). 

    As with any DIY project, do it because you love it and already have the supplies/materials on-hand.  Nickels and dimes add up to real money really quickly to the point that you often end up spending more money than it'd been to hire out something nice from a vendor who does it once and you don't have the cost of the value of your time.

    Only thing I'd like to add to this cause it's all spot on is about FTD. FTD, Teleflora etc are order networks and aggregators, not florists. They take a cut (between 10-30%) of all orders placed and send the order to a local florist. Always ALWAYS find and call a local florist for everything if you're going to do anything besides DIY for flowers. Not only are you going to get more bang for your buck but you're supporting a local business. This goes for not just weddings but birthdays, sympathy, Valentine's, mothers day, Etc.
    kimmiinthemitten
  • Dress: you can go inexpensive on the dress by buying a used dress, buying a white bridesmaids or prom dress, or just wearing what you feel comfortable in and already own

    Hair/make-up: These can be done simply by yourself with make-up you already own. There's some great tutorials on YouTube if you'd like suggestions. Just practice if it's not something you already do regularly.

    Photos: See if anyone you know has friends or family that is trying to get into the wedding photo business, or put a post on Craigslist. (Avoid asking a guest to be a photographer.) If someone is just starting out, they may be willing to work for considerably less than an established photographer.

    Food: Avoiding the #6, as PP have it covered. Get a sheet cake from Costco. They taste fantastic and are very budget friendly.

    "There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness." -Friedrich Nietzsche, "On Reading and Writing"
    OurWildKingdom
  • How many ppl are on your guestlist?
    With family alone, we're at about 100 people.  Some of FH's more distant family (those that live in Florida our out of the country) may not come, but all of my extended family will want to.

      JediElizabeth said:
    Agree with all PPs re: #6.

    When are you thinking of having your wedding? A Sunday afternoon may be less expensive than Saturday, and venues are often cheaper in the winter than summer. 
    Hoping for April 1 of next year, since it's the anniversary of our first date, and a Saturday and 100% of both of our families live out of town.  I know Saturday is more expensive, but some of my family will have a 10-hour drive and his family will probably have to fly.




    And I guess I just have a very different attitude towards cooking than many responders.  I enjoy cooking for holiday parties (12 people) by myself, or for Thanksgiving dinner (30 people) with the help of just my dad and an aunt.  Cooking in a group is more appealing to me than the "work" of attending a traditional bachelorette party, sticking to a schedule as you run around town, spending money on food and drinks and themed tshirts and whatever activities your bride wants to do for her version of fun.  And I don't have "12 closest friends" to invite, I just have cousins and FSIL's.  But I didn't consider that they wouldn't enjoy hanging out and cooking, so I will definitely consider that before making that the only option.  

    Although, accepting an invitation to a wedding definitely is accepting to "pay and work."  In my experience, you're signing up for hours of driving, paying for gifts, attending pre-wedding functions for multiple weekends, which can all be burdens to close friends or family of the bride.  I don't want to burden my family any more than I have to, so I won't count on them to help with the cooking.  

    And yes, I did plan on setting up all the food in the reception area before putting on my dress, but I didn't have someone pegged yet for food maintenence during the wedding itself. 



    Thanks so much for the tips on flowers (although I really just want to do paper flowers for the literary theme and just don't care very much about having real flowers), and dress and veil suggestions.  FH and I would love to be married outdoor so hopefully minimal decorations would be required.  




    On the question of why I started by listing all the things I *don't* want instead of focusing on the things I do (like my FH tells me to...), it's mostly because the wedding industry bombards you with the statistic of the #31K average wedding and all of the traditions you're supposed to do, then the special ways you can elaborate on top of those traditions to make your wedding "special," and the thousands of details you have to plan just because you want to spend you want to spend your life with someone.  On the final question of why I just don't elope --  I'd love to.  My close family will be a misery at my wedding, I'm not into any of the traditional wedding activities and all I care about is officially getting to be with the man I love.  But I have family who have begged me to let them know when I'm getting married, even if it's just to come stand beside me at a couthouse, and my extended family would want to be there.  FH's family would want to be there too.  And as soon as we invite family... that's 100 people. FH and I are very private, introverted people.  We don't share news or stories of our relationship with many.  For once I wanted people to see we were happy, instead of just informing people after the fact "btw we eloped" like we had to keep it a secret, like we're still too afraid to live our lives despite what other people think.




  • levioosa said:
    They have driven 10 hours to your wedding and you want to give them sub-par food they have to work for?  Seriously?  You are being very unrealistic with this idea.  I'm sure you're a great cook, but once again, cooking for 100 people is a whole different ballgame than cooking for 30.  You will be miserable, and your guests will be miserable.  Save everyone the pain and just get it catered.  

    The reception is a thank you to your guests for attending the ceremony.  Etiquette is also not about tradition, it is about treating your guests well.  That means a seat for every butt, a plan B for inclement weather, and enjoying food without the threat of botulism.  Flowers, favors, and bouquet tosses don't interfere with your guests' comfort.  Those are things that can be downgraded or done without altogether.  
    I've already conceded that others may not be interested in helping me, and maybe it wouldn't scale up as well as I hope because I haven't done it.  But why would you assume the food would be sub-par?  Anything homemade would be far better than the cheapest Italian catering, Subway, KFC, or grocery-store trays as all recommended above.  Home-cooked is almost always tastier and healthier, and I will admit that it may be unrealistic but you don't need to be insulting.  

    And I'm only throwing the wedding *itself* to be polite.  I understand that a reception is part of that.  If the party exists, it has to be one that is worth everyone's time.  At the same time, the reality is that the wedding only exists for their sake.  
  • levioosa said:
    They have driven 10 hours to your wedding and you want to give them sub-par food they have to work for?  Seriously?  You are being very unrealistic with this idea.  I'm sure you're a great cook, but once again, cooking for 100 people is a whole different ballgame than cooking for 30.  You will be miserable, and your guests will be miserable.  Save everyone the pain and just get it catered.  

    The reception is a thank you to your guests for attending the ceremony.  Etiquette is also not about tradition, it is about treating your guests well.  That means a seat for every butt, a plan B for inclement weather, and enjoying food without the threat of botulism.  Flowers, favors, and bouquet tosses don't interfere with your guests' comfort.  Those are things that can be downgraded or done without altogether.  
    I've already conceded that others may not be interested in helping me, and maybe it wouldn't scale up as well as I hope because I haven't done it.  But why would you assume the food would be sub-par?  Anything homemade would be far better than the cheapest Italian catering, Subway, KFC, or grocery-store trays as all recommended above.  Home-cooked is almost always tastier and healthier, and I will admit that it may be unrealistic but you don't need to be insulting.  

    And I'm only throwing the wedding *itself* to be polite.  I understand that a reception is part of that.  If the party exists, it has to be one that is worth everyone's time.  At the same time, the reality is that the wedding only exists for their sake.  
    It's not about the quality of the food. It's about food preparation and storage for 100 people. If you have never done that before and are not aware of the necessary steps/practices to ensure safety, there is a very high risk of food poisoning. The food may taste amazing, and better than Subway, KFC, or grocery store trays...but that doesn't mean it would be safe to eat. 


    [Deleted User]
  • Sounds like eloping would be the best way to cut your expenses. It seems fairly obvious you don't want to be planning this wedding.

    I also agree with everyone else about food safety. I would probably not want to eat the food at your wedding if I knew it was self-catered.
    ShesSoCold[Deleted User]CMGragainInLoveInQueens
  • julieanne912julieanne912 member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer
    edited March 2016
    I just wanted to add something about the food thing.  My BFF/MOH had a "meet the baby" party for the baby that she and her H adopted.  This party was 2 weeks before my wedding.  When her sister and I originally started talking about the party, we decided to divide it up... I would prepare the food, she would handle the decor and invites.  I knew the guest list was long, but figured only about 20-30 people would show up.

    60 people ended up RSVPing to the party.  I was like you, I was like, well, I like to cook and I have hosted Thanksgiving and other parties before.  But the most I've ever had to prepare food for, for a party at my own house which was an "open house" style, was 30.  Once you get above that it becomes a whole different ballgame.  

    I spent 10 hours on Saturday prepping and cooking, another 2 hours on Sunday morning doing finishing touches and figuring out how to transport everything so it would stay at safe temperatures and without making a mess in my car, then had to drive an hour to where the party was being held and spent another 2 hours there getting everything ready.  I had some help at the party location but otherwise I did it all myself.  And that doesn't count the time I spent in the week prior putting together the menu, making lists, making sure I had adequate serveware (enough platters etc) and doing shopping at multiple stores to save money. 

    I was completely exhausted by the end of that weekend.  I pretty much couldn't function and my body hurt everywhere. Sure, it was probably a bit less expensive than hiring someone to do the food, but my time is also worth money and if I had factored in that cost, it would have been cheaper to hire someone.  

    So, whenever I hear brides say they'll just cook the meal themselves, I want to say DON'T DO IT!!!!  You'll have enough to worry about that day, and you want to enjoy the day, not stress out on something that is easy enough to source out.

    Also side note: I used a catering company to do BBQ buffet for my wedding. Their cost was very reasonable, the food was excellent (some guests still talk about how good it was), and the catering company took care of EVERYTHING... even plates, cups, napkins, clean up, literally everything, I didn't have to worry about anything relating to that on the day of.  It was by far our largest expense of the day, but also by far the best money we could have spent.  And, if we had gone the route PP's mentioned, we could have saved even more.
    Married 9.12.15
    image
    [Deleted User]InLoveInQueens
  • I've been to a wedding where the reception was very expensively catered, and the food was disgusting, so I understand that unenjoyable food can severely impact the event.  The redeeming quality of that wedding was the 5+ hours of dancing, but the demographics will be different at my wedding so that's unlikely.


    It's ok, y'all have good points.  I'm just upset because you've literally recommended I not hold the only social aspect of the entire event that I was actually looking forward to (cooking the day before with family).  But I get it.



    And a small wedding with just immediate families is the least preferable option -- that would have a full 50% of guests wishing the wedding wasn't happening.  Only my extended family is supportive of us, on my side.
  • kylexokylexo Finger Lakes, NY member
    500 Love Its Third Anniversary 100 Comments Name Dropper
    I've been to a wedding where the reception was very expensively catered, and the food was disgusting, so I understand that unenjoyable food can severely impact the event.  The redeeming quality of that wedding was the 5+ hours of dancing, but the demographics will be different at my wedding so that's unlikely.


    It's ok, y'all have good points.  I'm just upset because you've literally recommended I not hold the only social aspect of the entire event that I was actually looking forward to (cooking the day before with family).  But I get it.



    And a small wedding with just immediate families is the least preferable option -- that would have a full 50% of guests wishing the wedding wasn't happening.  Only my extended family is supportive of us, on my side.
    eeeek eeeek eeeeek! I would absolutely HAAATE being invited to a cooking party (I take no enjoyment it cooking and try to stay as far from the kitchen as possible.) Just because you like it doesn't mean your family/friends do too. I'd also be seriously side-eyeing if not outright telling you that it's rude to expect your wedding guests to work for your wedding.

    Which isn't even getting into the fact that you don't want to have this wedding and are hosting more than 50% of the guest list who is not supportive of this marriage! Slow down, reevaluate all of this! Seriously! If someone isn't supportive of your union, why are you inviting them? Why are you hosting them for a party to celebrate that union? No no no no no.
    [Deleted User]InLoveInQueens
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