My long-time same-sex partner and I got married last fall. It was a perfunctory city hall wedding, but after we announced it, we received many cards and gifts, which was unexpected. We had special wishes from everyone except my sister-in-law and her churchgoing family, which includes my husband’s goddaughter, a college senior. When I confirmed with my husband that they hadn’t done anything, he said he was trying not to notice. I understand his emotional bind, but I feel uncertain how to proceed. His niece is graduating soon, and of course we’d be expected to notice and give a gift. Not sending something feels downright petty, but at the same time I am unenthused. Is there a correct stance in this?
—Not Feeling Generous