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Wedding Woes

Tuesday :)

Morning!  What's up?

Tonight is Wooz's second-to-last art class for this session.  I think after we drop her off, I'll take DS to the park for some one-on-one.  Once I get the kids in bed, I have to get all of our stuff together for swim practice tomorrow.

I think we might skip the neighborhood pool party.  The kids have swim at 3:30 on Sunday, and then we were planning to head to the Whitewater Center, because they do fireworks at dusk.  Pool party is scheduled for Sunday, so something will have to give.

Speaking of dusk, DS did NOT want to put his pajamas on last night.  "But it's daytime!" he said.  I could not persuade him that even though it wasn't that dark, it was still bedtime.

In Luke-and-Leia twins news, there is a new twist.  Yesterday, Mr. Heff's manager was asking him and one of his coworkers a bunch of questions about Trainwreck's timeline:  how long he had known the GF, whether she was pregnant when they met, etc.  From what they gathered, it seems that Trainwreck's paternity leave may be based on him either implying or outright stating that he is the twins' father, which he is not.  (Which, we wondered about the logistics of taking paternity leave in his case, in which he is not the babies' father, has no legal relationship with their mother, etc.)  Apparently something tingled Manager's spider sense, and she started digging.  We'll see how this plays out.
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Re: Tuesday :)

  • Today is DD2's last day of preschool.  She has a program tonight, I am guessing like a graduation.  They're going to sing songs and then they'll show a slideshow and pass out certificates.

    After the program we'll head over to Son's baseball game.  It's the first HS game of the season and he's playing on varsity.

    The clutter is creeping up on me again and I'm starting to twitch about it.  We got our summer clothes out of the attic, so 4 tubs are sitting in the hallway waiting for winter clothes to go in them.  And the kids just keep bringing crap home from school.  Why is there so much crap?  I don't need the math and science workbooks that are 100% completed.

    As soon as I get my work done, I'm tearing into this mess.


    Heffalumpbleve0821mrsconn23charlotte989875
  • bleve0821bleve0821 The Shire member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
    Apparently, my competition for this job opening submitted an "identical" list as I did of reasons why we should get the job.  Not sure how it's possible for them to be "identical"--similar, sure, but I'll roll with it.

    Because of that, we're going to be subjected to a "surprise" interview, whatever the fuck that means.  I have had two interviews in my life, neither of them recent, and I did not get the sense that this is really a "job interview," so there's that.

    Today, however, I am side-eyeing these two old men in a sister office so hard.  The individual who had accepted this position several months ago can no longer can take it due to emergent family health issues, and for no less than 10 minutes, I heard these yentas discussing what that means for this individual and his career, and where the mom lives, and speculation on what's wrong with the mom, and how they're going to lose the earnest money on their house.  I thought for sure the issue had been beaten well to death, when one of the guys said, "I want to catch up with you later and talk about this some more, this sounds really interesting."

    AYFKM?  For starters, how is this any of your business?  And to follow up, HOW IS THIS ANY OF YOUR BUSINESS?

    I'm feeling a little prickly today.  


    "And when they use our atoms to make new lives, they won’t just be able to take one, they’ll have to take two, one of you and one of me..."
    --Philip Pullman

    charlotte989875
  • I remember my mom trying to put me to bed before the sun went down in the summer. Just standing at the window in my room, watching the older kids play kickball in the street. *le sigh* ;)
    tawillers
  • 6fsn6fsn member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    I see the allergist at 1 tomorrow. Until then I'm just trying not to claw my skin off. Im
    also praying it's something treatable and easy to avoid. 

    I just dropped 6lwt at basketball camp and we're at the playground. There at two moms going on about workout routines and tough mudders and all sorts of things I can't relate too. 
    MesmrEwe
  • @Heffalump, DefConn's room faces west...we ended up getting a room darkening curtain so we can put him to bed before 9p.  

    DH admitted to me today that he doesn't want a dog.  We don't mind being dog-sitters for FIL's dog, but neither one of us want to deal with being full time dog owners.  So maybe I will not hear about it again for awhile.  ;)

    Once we get our deck stained, we can start focusing on landscaping.  I think we just need to do clean and add more flowers to our front bed.  We were contemplating taking out a rose bush on the back of our house, but they are blooming and such a pretty color...we're going to read up on pruning/training the plant instead. 

    Our friend's daughter was officially diagnosed with a cancerous brain tumor.  They got most of it out, but there was some attached to her spinal cord that they couldn't get to for fear of paralysis.  The good news is that she was wiggling her toes and squeezing the doc's hand.  The bad news is that a) it's aggressive and spreads quickly and b) she's got a long road of chemo and radiation in front of her.  This cancer is curable with up to an 80% survival rate, but dear God, I would have such a hard time not thinking about the 20%+ chance my child would not survive.  DH is probably heading up there today.  I think I'll stay back with DefConn.  He might take the kiddo, since our friend has an older daughter the kiddo's age.  They probably won't let DefConn in to see her since she's in ICU. Plus he's 5 and has no concept of the situation. 
  • FI and I are going to look at more houses tonight. We have 6 more on the list.

    My mom and I decided that we are going to go pick up my dress on Saturday instead of having them ship it to me. Its only a 2 hour drive and we can visit her brother while we are there. I'm excited and nervous to be finally getting my dress :)

    Wedding Countdown Ticker Wedding Countdown Ticker
    tawillersMesmrEwekimmiinthemittencharlotte989875
  • 6fsn6fsn member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    @mrs.conn23 what a struggle. I'm sorry at the road ahead but glad it's got such a high chance of recovery. 
    mrsconn23
  • That's rough, mrs.conn.  Good medical/doctor vibes!

    Is it Friday yet?  That's kinda all I got.
    mrsconn23MNNEBride
  • Still feeling sick, working from home. 
    DK has an interview this week for an opportunity that sounds promising. His current company has been dicking him over in terms of salary/promotions (e.g. he's been given higher level work, more people to manage, etc. without a change in salary, despite already being under market) and he's been feeling like the environment is getting toxic. I support him if he wants to move, so hopefully something good comes of this. 
  • ShesSoColdShesSoCold bend over and I'll show ya mod
    Moderator 5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its

    I'm making a 90s/grunge Pandora station and loving it. I haven't heard Offspring since they were current.

    Image result for someecard betting someone half your shit youll love them forever
    OurWildKingdomcharlotte989875
  • I don't have a lot to add. I feel like I post the same thing everyday.

    FH and I went out for mexican last night. Tonight we have an exciting date to talk about finances. Wednesday, my friend is supposed to get into town but I have not heard if she has left yet, sooooo..... I am not holding my breath. Thursday, riding. Friday, travel.

    Work is dead right now but will be full speed when I get back.

     I enjoyed my HMU trial last night, there are just a couple things I will have her tweak day of. FH and I are starting premarital counseling the wednesday after I get back. He is finally seeing the benefit of going and not seeing it as me saying we have problems we need to work on.
  • kimmiinthemittenkimmiinthemitten Detroit, MI member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    Before I post about my controversial pity party I want to say @mrs.conn23 I'm sending all of the good vibes I have to her.  It sounds scary, yet so hopeful!  80% is a great prognosis.

    So I know you're not supposed to count money until it's in hand and you can't tell other people how to spend theirs, but that doesn't mean when someone falls back on a promise it doesn't hurt.  Quick back story:  my parents sucked at being parents and neither of them ever really provided for us growing up.  In the last decade or so, my dad has become far more responsible and out of not-spoken about guilt insisted on paying for sisters wedding dress and made a big deal out of it.  I should also mention that she's the GoldenChild who does no wrong and who I never live up to, despite being the one who lives here, and does all of the stuff that kids with aging and special need parents do (help them move, hospital visits, doctor appointments, etc). 

    Well yesterday, 2 days before our family trip to visit said sister, my dad tells me that he doesn't have the money to pay for my dress.  It doesn't break our wedding budget, the half of me that is always waiting for the other shoe to drop expected it; but it hurts like hell and the irrational and emotional side of me is angry too.  FTR sister is angry for me too and told my dad how unfair it was that he made a promise he can't keep considering all of the things I do for him.  It would just be nice if for once he did something for me.  I'll be fine, today is my 24 hour pity party and I'll move on.  I am just pouty and recovering from a whiskey hangover as a result.
    image
    mrsconn23VarunaTT
  • bleve0821bleve0821 The Shire member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
    @mrs.conn23 all the good vibes.

    I have been summoned for my surprise interview.  Holy crap, I think I'm going to throw up.


    "And when they use our atoms to make new lives, they won’t just be able to take one, they’ll have to take two, one of you and one of me..."
    --Philip Pullman

    mrsconn23
  • kimmiinthemittenkimmiinthemitten Detroit, MI member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    @mrs.conn23 all the good vibes.

    I have been summoned for my surprise interview.  Holy crap, I think I'm going to throw up.
    Good luck!  You got this!!
    image
    bleve0821
  • @kimmiinthemitten, that really sucks.  I'm sorry.  And FTR, it doesn't sound like you were counting on the money, and it's understandable to be hurt.  Boo.

    @mrs.conn, lots of healthy kid vibes, that is terrifying.

    ::hands @AtomicBlonde one of those airplane barf bags::
    kimmiinthemittenmrsconn23OurWildKingdombleve0821
  • OurWildKingdomOurWildKingdom in the 216 member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    @mrs.conn23 all the good vibes.

    I have been summoned for my surprise interview.  Holy crap, I think I'm going to throw up.
    You're going to ace it! Let us know how it goes!
    bleve0821
  • So, I booked our hotel room for Authors After Dark, and I signed up to help host a breakfast for readers, and I'm all like crazy about it. It feels simultaneously like the stupidest way to spend a shit ton of money and like a really good step for my career. Which I guess sums up being a novelist at all, really. 

    I also get to go back to my writing office next week! FINALLY. I've basically taken a year off while H was out of work and I had three jobs and I was starting to feel really depressed about it all. Getting back on track and having that protected time to work is going to be heavenly. And I'm going to debut the next vampire novel at AAD, so I have a deadline to get it edited, formatted, and covered by July, so we can order physical books to bring with us. (For any of you following the series, it'll be a soft launch in July, so you'll be able to buy it for e-readers then.) 

    If I'm lucky and especially diligent, I'll get three books out this year, and then have some time to fuck around with some non-fanged ideas I have. And maybe I'll actually sell some shit this summer. 
    image
    Heffalumpbleve0821OurWildKingdommrsconn23
  • @6fsn I hope they can figure out what is making you so miserable.

    @AtomicBlonde Good luck

    @mrs.conn23 80% is pretty decent. Brain cancer has to be one of the most terrifying combination of words in the english language. 

    @*Barbie* hope you start feeling better soon!

    @kimmiinthemitten can I join your pity party? My bff was planning my bachelorette (and apparently a shower I didn't know about) but then he died. I didn't really want a "bachelorette party", but I was letting him plan/ throw it because it made him happy. So after he died I just decided to have a girls night since I had already booked my flight back home. Now my sister has decided to take it over and turn my girls night into a bachelorette party. My best girlfriend is trying to help but my sister won't return any of her calls. Then my sister calls me complaining because she doesn't know who to invite, idk how about the girls I was already planning on hanging out with and no one else. I hate when anyone in my family tries to organize anything because it just turns into a jumbled, confusing mess. My best girl has a good idea of a plan but if my sister isn't included in the planning/ get her way she will get all butthurt. This is not that complicated! 
  • Before I post about my controversial pity party I want to say @mrs.conn23 I'm sending all of the good vibes I have to her.  It sounds scary, yet so hopeful!  80% is a great prognosis.

    So I know you're not supposed to count money until it's in hand and you can't tell other people how to spend theirs, but that doesn't mean when someone falls back on a promise it doesn't hurt.  Quick back story:  my parents sucked at being parents and neither of them ever really provided for us growing up.  In the last decade or so, my dad has become far more responsible and out of not-spoken about guilt insisted on paying for sisters wedding dress and made a big deal out of it.  I should also mention that she's the GoldenChild who does no wrong and who I never live up to, despite being the one who lives here, and does all of the stuff that kids with aging and special need parents do (help them move, hospital visits, doctor appointments, etc). 

    Well yesterday, 2 days before our family trip to visit said sister, my dad tells me that he doesn't have the money to pay for my dress.  It doesn't break our wedding budget, the half of me that is always waiting for the other shoe to drop expected it; but it hurts like hell and the irrational and emotional side of me is angry too.  FTR sister is angry for me too and told my dad how unfair it was that he made a promise he can't keep considering all of the things I do for him.  It would just be nice if for once he did something for me.  I'll be fine, today is my 24 hour pity party and I'll move on.  I am just pouty and recovering from a whiskey hangover as a result.

    That bites hind (...)!!!!! 

    <Pouring one well deserved for you!!!>


    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    VarunaTTkimmiinthemitten
  • kimmiinthemittenkimmiinthemitten Detroit, MI member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    Thanks everyone, I appreciate it! 

    @missJeanLouise that's not a pity party, that's awful.  I'm so sorry to hear about your best friend!  And yes, the party planning part does suck.  Can you say something to sister?

    Margarita happy hour for all of WW today (and because my sig meme isn't vulgar enough):


    image
    HeffalumpMNNEBridemissJeanLouise
  • bleve0821bleve0821 The Shire member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
    Thanks for the good vibes, guys.  They were most appreciated.

    The "surprise!" interview was... interesting.  I was not asked about my qualifications or my abilities or my merits. Instead, I was pretty much only asked about my level of interest in the position. Um, wtf? I am clearly more interested THAN THE GUY WHO SAID NO, WHY ARE YOU ASKING ME THESE QUESTIONS.

    At the end of this extremely bizarre line of questioning, I was informed that a "formal interview" will follow (oh, thank god). But, I was also told that I probably won't get the position because they're probably going to give it to Mr. No because they hired him a month before me, so he has seniority.

    ??????

    I feel like I need a margarita at least the size of my head.  And I have a strange urge to listen to Fatboy Slim on repeat...


    "And when they use our atoms to make new lives, they won’t just be able to take one, they’ll have to take two, one of you and one of me..."
    --Philip Pullman

    OurWildKingdomcharlotte989875mrsconn23
  • Just got back from the damn eye doctor.  My kerotaconus is getting worse (I've misspelled it, fuck it) and now I'm into a specialty contact that requires another doctor appointment for fitting.  They're putting me into a trial to try and stop the progress, no reversal, that I'm sure is just going to be fun.  Also, they dilated me, which is usually no problem, but it's freakin' painful right now and my eyes won't stop watering.  I'm thinking about taking this big work project home so I can work on it tonight when my pupils aren't so blown.
  • I agree with @kimmiinthemitten, everybody gets a margarita. *picture Oprah throwing them out to the crowd* 
    bleve0821OurWildKingdomVarunaTTkimmiinthemitten
  • My vacation was TOO SHORT and going back to work sucked today because I feel fat, tired, and broke. Although I didn't spend quite as much as I thought, so that's not as bad as it could be. I mostly bought booze, lol. We came home with two bottles of wine, two of moonshine, one of red velvet cake liqueur, one of gin, two of rum, one of Pimm's because it was the first time I've ever found it in a liquor store, and four tiny 'sample' type bottles. Plus (non-alcoholic but booze related) moonshine jelly, strawberry-basil simple syrup, and a candle made out of a recycled wine bottle.

    I miss the food already. Everything we ate was SOOO good.
    image
    VarunaTTkimmiinthemitten
  • @AtomicBlonde this makes me so angry  for you! He turned it down! You don't get a do-over, you passed on it. (Sorry totally yelling at this guy in my head here). I think I remember you saying you thought they preferred to have a man in the position, any feeling like this is why they're giving him another shot? (If I'm totally making that up and not remembering it correctly, ignore me, I spent way too many hours in Home Depot today). 
    Heffalump
  • OurWildKingdomOurWildKingdom in the 216 member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    I agree with @kimmiinthemitten, everybody gets a margarita. *picture Oprah throwing them out to the crowd* 
    IDK, might want to duck the flying glasses.  :D
  • Thanks for the good vibes, guys.  They were most appreciated.

    The "surprise!" interview was... interesting.  I was not asked about my qualifications or my abilities or my merits. Instead, I was pretty much only asked about my level of interest in the position. Um, wtf? I am clearly more interested THAN THE GUY WHO SAID NO, WHY ARE YOU ASKING ME THESE QUESTIONS.

    At the end of this extremely bizarre line of questioning, I was informed that a "formal interview" will follow (oh, thank god). But, I was also told that I probably won't get the position because they're probably going to give it to Mr. No because they hired him a month before me, so he has seniority.

    ??????

    I feel like I need a margarita at least the size of my head.  And I have a strange urge to listen to Fatboy Slim on repeat...
    On a scale of 1 to 10, how punchable is this guy's face?

    I'm not advocating punching him, he just sounds like a guy with a really punchable face.  Either way, this is some extreme work fuckery.
    kimmiinthemittencharlotte989875mrsconn23bleve0821
  • kimmiinthemittenkimmiinthemitten Detroit, MI member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    @AtomicBlonde I'm all fired up for you. That is some bullshit right there. I vote that you make a strong case for yourself in the real interview and tell them that both candidates need to be considered by their merits and not the 30 days difference in hiring dates.   Have a bullet list of what you have brought to the table and if appropriate goals you have for the new position and then close that shit by saying something like "I really look forward to xyz about the new position. When do you expect to have a decision?"

    You've motivated me actually to go to speak to my bosses boss today about the position I want since my boss just dangles the carrot in every review. 

    Make a a case for yourself, don't back down and don't let them pass you by for what you want. If a man can get up and ask for it after turning it down then you can go in there and say "I've never wavered."
    image
    charlotte989875Heffalumpbleve0821
  • bleve0821bleve0821 The Shire member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
    edited May 2016
    @charlotte989875 My organization realizes there's a minority of women working for them, and in these kinds of positions, especially, and they're working really hard to change that.  Women are slowly matriculating into the field, but there's been some resistance from the other field workers (grumpy old men).  "Personalities clashing," as senior management calls it.  It's probably unfair of me to blame gender biases, but I know that there's a big concern over what to do if the female field workers start/grow their families, because after a certain stage in the pregnancy, they don't want her working in the field (legal and health reasons).  It happened recently, and there was this ungodly panic in the office to find a temp.

    I'm not sure why they're giving him a second shot (maybe they want to get rid of him?  He's not all that likeable...). I'd like to think that maybe he has some kind of qualification I don't that's making them re-consider him for the position rather than the gender issue.  But I definitely don't understand why senior management would tell me that in all likelihood he'll get the position.  That was just too much honesty, and while I'm gonna give it my all, regardless, I can't help but think, "What's the point?"

    @Heffalump 10, because it would make me feel a lot better.  1, because I feel like getting arrested may negatively impact my career advancement.

    ETA @kimmiinthemitten YOU GO GIRL!


    "And when they use our atoms to make new lives, they won’t just be able to take one, they’ll have to take two, one of you and one of me..."
    --Philip Pullman

    charlotte989875kimmiinthemitten
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