Telling Your Boss that You're Moving Out of Town After the Wedding

trainerlaurak

Hey all!

I'm in a long distance relationship and we got engaged a week ago. Our wedding will be in about 14 months. I will be leaving my job and moving to my fiance's city (~4 hours away) as soon as we're married. When do I tell my boss? I absolutely love my job, my boss, and our tiny little company (~20 employees). I fully intend to continue pursuing my career in this field in the new city so I'd like to keep gaining relevant experience (i.e. not being put on the back burner for too long while they hire and train a replacement) but also not burn any bridges and be as helpful as I can for them during the transition. Anyone out there have any tips?

(I searched for discussion on this already, but couldn't find one. If you know of one out there, please direct me that way and/or let me know if there is a better board to post this on.)

PaperTigersx

What is your company's policy on resignations? Mine is one month. So if I was in your position (also a small company), I would let them know a month in advance. I wouldn't go into personal details in a formal letter, but state that I was appreciative of the opportunity the company gave me to grow, but life circumstances has led me to a new area and I would need to resign effective one month from now. 
With a small company, I would discuss privately with my boss that my new marriage was having me leave town. (I would personally do this because my job is small and close knit.) then hand in my formal letter. 
I would not send in a resignation letter before company policy. 
Good luck! 

crowsgirl15

thelovelylaurak said:

Hey all!

I'm in a long distance relationship and we got engaged a week ago. Our wedding will be in about 14 months. I will be leaving my job and moving to my fiance's city (~4 hours away) as soon as we're married. When do I tell my boss? I absolutely love my job, my boss, and our tiny little company (~20 employees). I fully intend to continue pursuing my career in this field in the new city so I'd like to keep gaining relevant experience (i.e. not being put on the back burner for too long while they hire and train a replacement) but also not burn any bridges and be as helpful as I can for them during the transition. Anyone out there have any tips?

(I searched for discussion on this already, but couldn't find one. If you know of one out there, please direct me that way and/or let me know if there is a better board to post this on.)

Much like PP, I would tell them when you're required to tell them, or perhaps two weeks before (my job requires 2 weeks so I would likely tell them a month before to give them a little extra time). Remember that this is business, not personal, even though you love the job and your boss. As long as you are both professional, it should be fine!

lyndausvi

I'm sure it's crossed their minds there is a possibility of you moving.  I doubt it would be a surprised.   Personally I would tell them about a month out.  They seem to have been good to you, so it's nice to give them a little more time.  

It really depends on the company and industry though.   I gave one company 7 weeks notice when I was going to move to the islands.  They appreciated the extra time.

When I moved from the islands I gave the company 3 months notice.  In that case, my husband worked for the same company and was transferred, so it wasn't a surprise to them.  I just wanted to work till the end of the summer. Which was a win-win for both of us because the boat shuts down for 6-8 weeks in Sept/Oct.  So they didn't have to find someone only to lay them off a few weeks later.

In some industries, giving notice basically means you leave immediately with 2 weeks severance.    

englishrose-2

You are perfectly entitled to leave your job when you like and don't need to feel guilty. I agree that you should wait until you are required to tell your employer, perhaps with a small extension as a courtesy.

charlotte989875

What are the hiring norms in your field? Are there particular times when it's easier/harder to hire and train someone? If my area we hire in the mid/late fall to start in the late summer/early fall of the following year. So I gave notice nearly 8 months before I resigned, even though I was required to only give a few weeks. I still had projects and was involved in the department, but it gave them time to hire the best possible candidate to replace me, rather than waiting to hire at an inopportune time. 

SP29

I agree to go by what is in your company policy/contract. Perhaps an extra week or two.

Submit a formal letter of resignation and keep it very professional. If you have a good relationship with your boss, you can get a bit more personal when you deliver the letter. Do remember this is business, not personal.

DH and I previously lived in another part of the country. DH was offered a job back in our hometown, and he accepted- partially because of the job, partially because it was back near our families, where we'd like to raise our future children. My contract stated I had to give 30 days notice. I gave about 2-2.5 months, but initially told my boss I was not entirely sure when my last day would be and she was cool with that. Eventually I had to pick a day so they could post my job position, but I knew my boss and teammates would be supportive, my reason for leaving was nothing to do with the job itself, I had seen how the manager handled other people leaving, and knew my job position is something that takes a bit of time to recruit and hire for, so I wanted to give more notice. DH was also required to give 30 days, and ended up giving his notice about 35 days in advance. His company terminated him with 30 days severance that very day. He was initially upset, as he had been a good employee and it was also just business, but that is the company policy (I guess they are worried an ex-employee could steal clients or documents).

MesmrEwe

One thought is "plans change" - you never know when circumstances might change such that you'll stay there.  I wouldn't say anything until it's close to the time to move, say one to two months depending on what the industry norm is and you've lined up your new position in the other part of the country. 

ernursej

Agree to wait until much closer to the date. Some companies may take your notice and let you go earlier so that you don't take company secrets etc. with you.