I am having a small, private wedding with just parents and grands in attendance. FMIL is taking it super hard and acting as if I am doing this to her intentionally, when FI and I decided long ago it's what we both wanted. To me it feels like she has to disagree with my/our decision about every last thing- and the latest is a cake. FMIL wants a cake at the post ceremony dinner out that we are having, but I almost never eat out and almost never eat dessert because of serious food allergies.
FI and I already decided to end our wedding with dinner, but now the idea for cake that FMIL wants to choose and order/cake from restaurant/cake I make and serve at post dinner cake and coffee thing is quickly forming. I cook, but I rarely bake because there is so little I can eat without a ton of substitutes, plus I don't like sweets. I also do not want to add baker/coffee and cake party hostess to my list of things to do before we leave for our room for the night and airport the following morning.
Do I stick to my guns and say no to a cake? Or, let her order a cake for everyone but me to enjoy? If do not want to jam myself with an epipen on my wedding day if someone forgets (because people get carried away or forget or are just dumb) and decides to smash wedding cake into my face.