Wedding Party

What will I do with my niece and nephew?

I have nowhere to put my niece and nephew. We are having a small wedding and my 13 year old is a groomsmen, my 7 year old will be ring bearer. The ceremony site does not allow flower petals of any kind to be tossed, so my 3 year old niece is out as flower girl, and I never really knew what to do with my 6 year old nephew, her brother. Do I have to leave them out? I don't want to do that, it breaks my heart. Help me! Where can I put them??

Re: What will I do with my niece and nephew?

  • They don't *need* to be in the wedding. It's not heartbreaking to not include them, and it may be easier for the 3 year old (or her parents) to allow her to sit with them or another family member. 

    If you're hell-bent on including them, she can carry a bouquet or wave a ribbon wand or something. The 6 year old nephew can also walk with the ring bearer. There's no rule that says you can only have one of each of those "roles," or that each "role" needs to be filled. We had neither, and we're still married.
  • I have nowhere to put my niece and nephew. We are having a small wedding and my 13 year old is a groomsmen, my 7 year old will be ring bearer. The ceremony site does not allow flower petals of any kind to be tossed, so my 3 year old niece is out as flower girl, and I never really knew what to do with my 6 year old nephew, her brother. Do I have to leave them out? I don't want to do that, it breaks my heart. Help me! Where can I put them??
    In the audience.

    They don't need a special role other than "guest".
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  • edited April 2018
    Most of the weddings I've attended have been in churches where no petal or confetti  throwing was allowed. The flower girls carried little bouquets. I have never seen flower girls throw petals, except on tv. You can have 2 ring bearers. Have each boy carry one ring. Or, you could call your niece and nephew 'pages,'  if they need a title. That is if you want your niece and nephew in the wp. If you don't, they can be guests, include them in the family pics. 
                       
  • So, ring bearer for nephew and bouquet holder for niece. I like it..Thanks guys

  • Most of the weddings I've attended have been in churches where no petal or confetti  throwing was allowed. The flower girls carried little bouquets. I have never seen flower girls throw petals, except on tv. You can have 2 ring bearers. Have each boy carry one ring. Or, you could call your niece and nephew 'pages,'  if they need a title. That is if you want your niece and nephew in the wp. If you don't, they can be guests, include them in the family pics. 

    I've actually seen it more often than not!  But then, I grew up in and currently live in temperate climate areas where at least half the weddings I've been to are outside.

    I've shared this before, but need to tell my own FG story.  My 5-year-old niece was my FG.  My mom was the one arranging the order with the flower shop.

    She asked my niece, "M***, do you want to carry a bouquet like your mom and your aunt?  Or do you want to carry a basket of rose petals and scatter them on the ground?"

    M's reply, with a slightly scolding tone was, "Grandma, I want to carry rose petals.  Because that's what flowergirls are SUPPOSED to do!"

    As an aside, I have a few pics from my photographer that I just LOVE!!!  She had my niece stand next to me and throw rose petals high in the air.  The photog perfectly captured pics with the rose petals dotting the scene.

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  • I think for church weddings, petal throwing is no longer a thing. I have only seen it done once recently. When I was a FG (50+ years ago) I threw rose petals in a church but don't know if that church still allows it. The one church that I attended where the FGs scattered petals was adorable. They obviously were taught to pick up after themselves because during the recessional the youngest FG stopped to pick up all the petals she had tossed! The congregation had a good chuckle. Once again the kids stole the show!
  • ei34ei34 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    I was married in a Catholic Church in 2013 and my FG threw petals.  I’d say it’s a 50/50 mix of throwing petals and carrying a bouquet or pomander.
    Ditto PP to just have two ring bearers.  I have a ton of cousins, growing up there were several times I was one of 6 or 7 flower girls  :D
  • You don't have to do anything with them. There's no requirement that every member of your family have a "role" in your wedding.

    But if you do want to include them beyond being guests, there is no reason why they couldn't be ring bearers or carry things that can't be tossed or scattered.
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