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Children at bridal shower but not at wedding?

mkbobe90mkbobe90 member
edited March 3 in Etiquette
I’m 1 of 27 first cousins. All my female cousins, who I’m extremely close with, are invited to my shower. However, some have little girls I’d love to have there but I have a strict NO children policy at my wedding with the exception of our niece and nephews (all of whom are in our wedding). So my question is, is it ok to invite the girls to the shower but not the wedding? 

Re: Children at bridal shower but not at wedding?

  • I'm surprised that you are so adamant about not having kids at your wedding but would "love" to have them at your bridal shower. 

    If you are going to stick to not inviting these kids to the wedding, you should not invite them to the shower either. It's not right to invite anyone to pre-wedding parties without inviting them to the wedding, and if you invite the kids to the shower, it's bound to cause confusion and hurt feelings when they don't get to go to the wedding.
  • I'm with the others on this one. The purpose of a bridal shower really is to give gifts. Do not solicit gifts from people who are not invited to the event that those gifts are commemorating.
  • climbingwifeclimbingwife NYC 'burbs member
    10000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Don't invite them to the shower if they're not welcome at your wedding. 

  • I'll echo PPs.   Please don't have a child-friendly shower but not a child friendly wedding. 

    I get it.   DH's family is HUGE.   But that's a choice that you need to make.

    You won't be hosting your own shower but I'd just make it clear to the shower hosts that the only children invited to the wedding are those of your siblings and therefore only those kids (if any) should be invited to the shower. 
  • ei34ei34 member
    Seventh Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I have over 30 first cousins.  Everyone was invited to everything when I got married.  My youngest sister is getting married in June and she’s keeping things smaller.  Her shower is in a few weeks and only guests invited to her wedding were invited to her shower- including the children of our cousins (invited to neither).  
  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    10000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    edited March 6
    If you're not inviting the children to your wedding, then they shouldn't be invited to the shower, which, by the way, you shouldn't be giving or planning.

    Wedding-related events really aren't ways to "include" non-wedding guests.
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